I was ready to defend this woman until I found out she had already ordered a cake from Kroger's and paid for it with food stamps. I really don't understand why she wants her friend to have her own special little cake.
I do not begrudge anyone who gets food stamps or public assistance. I do, however, get upset when I see these things abused. I am on the board of directors for our local thrift shop and food pantry. I have seen so much poverty and unhappiness. I have also seen so much abuse of the system. We have people apply and lie about how many children they have or have more than one family claim the same children.
At Christmas we normally give out an extra food basket and a choice of either a new blanket or new bath towel. Last year I suggested that we give out a bag of hygiene products. Some on the board thought I was crazy. Said that these people wouldn't use the products. I told them they might be surprised. They can buy candy and soda and junk food with their food stamps but they cannot buy shampoo, toothpaste, deodorant, etc. I won the argument and we made up 100 hygiene kits. They chose them over the blankets. As I told them, maybe they just needed that extra boost to better themselves. People that learn better do better. Now those who thought I was crazy are taking the credit for such a wonderful idea and already stockpiling products for this year's hygiene kits. I don't care who takes the credit, I'm just glad we did it. 
I also work with Lions Club and see abuse of the services we provide such as eyeglasses, food baskets, etc. My good friend told me to give with an open heart. If they take it and don't deserve it, they will answer for it someday. You did what you should do. So, I try to live by that.
As for cakes for your children, I think that people have gone way over the top as far as birthday parties, cakes, goodie bags, etc. are concerned. I was very happy with the cakes my mom made me and my kids were happy with cakes I made them before I learn to do a little decorating. I know it is what makes the living of several on here but people get a little extravagant for a little child's birthday sometimes.
Now that I have ranted on every subject in the book, I will shut up. 
Didn't mean to steal your thread with my opinions. It just happened.
Diane
As someone who isn't ashamed of the fact that we get assistance when needed from the state I have to say something here.
I agree that there should be a few stronger stipulations on what is approved purchases for Food Stamps purchases, but at the same time I'm thankful that I can get a few things like soda and name brand kool aid for my daughter to drink instead of drinking soda or water that may have something wrong with it because I can't afford to buy bottled water.
My husband's ex-wife... she's the type that will take the child support paid for the children's care and spend it on a $70.00 shirt on ebay. She's made the mistake of telling me this repeatedly lol. Also she doesn't work, gets disability, gets another state issued check for some reason, and her husband makes the same amount mine does. They just signed the mortgage contract to buy their house last year. We're still renting. She is barely getting by on all the money they get, over $1000.00 more a month then we do, but wants to complain when everyone tells her to stay off ebay and quit buying "crap" she doesn't need like candels and smelly wax stuff...
Anyway I've been in and out of work since I was pregnant with my 8 yr old, mainly I can't work because I can't stand for more then 10 minutes at a time because I have 2 shattered discs in my spine plus 2 slipped discs higher up. I have a few medical problems that prevent me from working but at the same time not enough wrong with me that I'm eligable for disability. We've had food stamps since I was pregnant with my daughter. When he was making less an hour then he is now it was a little over $300.00 a month. Trust me that is no where near enough to feed 3 people 3 meals a day for 31 days. We were adding $100.~ to $200.~ a month to it in cash for groceries.
Now that he's making a little more an hour then before I was told I'd get a whopping $61.~ a month. I told them to keep it and give it to someone less fortunate then us. So now we have gone from not having to pay very much a month for food to having to buy everything each week and it's a very hard transition but we had no choice. We are glad that they finally drew the line because it was getting a little old having to go in there every 6 months and give them all the info all over again and then watch them screw it up. He pays $332.00 a month in child support for two children, that was put into effect when he was making $6.00 an hour, less then minimum wage here. They didn't care, they figured she needed it more then we did. What did she spend it on? Drugs. She got food stamps, over $400.00 a month for her and two kids... what did she spend them on? She exchanged them with a drug dealer for drugs.
I don't think this woman was asking for sympathy because she's a single mom or that she's on food stamps, but what I think happened is she's used to having to explain why the bills are late or why she needs a little assistance paying the light bill that month... everyone falls on hard times and if you don't consider yourselves lucky.
My parents never received anything from the government until they took in my sisters 3 kids, now all they get is.... nothing! The children get SSI because of their mother's condition, and they already had medical insurance thru the state. The people that actually NEED the help and deserve it... don't get it! and if they do they don't get any where near enough to make a difference.
I don't think anyone here has a right to say what people can and can not spend their own money on. Once you pay your taxes it goes to the government, you can't tell them what to do with it, how to desperce it, or how much each welfare case should get because you're better off then they are. You can't stand in line at the store and critisize someone who uses a food stamps card in front of you and buys a 12 pack of Pepsi or Coke and ice cream. It's none of your business what they are spending THEIR money on. If the state didn't think they needed it they wouldn't give it to them. The state puts stipulations on it, you can't buy beer or alcohol, you can't buy tabacco, you can't buy anything that is prepared and hot like fried chicken. You can purchase name brand products and soda and such things like ice cream, cakes, and deli foods. Why shouldn't "we" (the food stamp receivers) be allowed to buy name brand foods? Most of the time it's on sale cheaper then the store brand. I think everyone needs to close their eyes and think of what they would do if they fell on hard times and didn't know where else to turn. And yes I do know first hand and do agree that there are people milking the state for money they don't deserve but then there are people that really do deserve it and can't get any help at all!
I worked in the HR department at a brokerage firm and I was in charge of charitable events. We decided to do a secret santa. I got a stack of letters and anyone interested could come into the office and pick out their letter. There were people who left my office in tears because some of the letters were just that touching but then there were the other letters asking for Play Stations ect. and people were really were pissed off. They felt that the kids were in desperate situations and they just couldn't understand why these kids would want exspensive toys when they probably wouldn't have an electrical socket of their own to plug them into. They often laughed said derogatory things about the stupidity of the children and wondered out loud if the parents had put them up to asking for expensive toys because what five year old would want something like that ect.
I tried to be neutral and not get dragged in but I could not believe what I was hearing. I asked one of the manager's one day "What does your 7 year old want for Christmas?" He said "That is a different situation. My kid can afford to have expensive tastes" I didn't understand then and I don't understand now. Poor or not we all are subject to advertising ect. I don't think the fact that this woman was on food stamps has any bearing on her desire to live beyond her means. Currently it is a national epidemic. The foreclosure rate is the highest it has been in thirty years for a variety of reasons but at the core is the very AMERICAN desire to live beyond our means. Perhaps the fact that she is on Public Assistance makes it worse but not by much. I agree with a lot of what has been said but I feel as though some of you could be a little more compasionate in your judgements.
Indy I feel you I have a friend that is just barely making it. She threw a sleepover birthday party for her daughter and probably gave away goody bags that were worth at least $40 per kid for eight girls and gave away another $150 in prizes throughout the night. This would all be ok if she could afford it. She got most of the stuff on layaway from the local Avon Lady and had to borrow from me to make sure the girls had something to eat that night and breakfast in the morning when she realized that she had over exstended herself. She has four children, she is not on public assistance but lives in the projects (government housing) and barely makes ends meet at a very low paying job. there is no way she should have been throwing this extravagant of a party for her kid. If I had half a brain I wouldn't have given her the money for food and maybe she would have seen the error of her ways but what was more likely to happen is that those kids would have been pretty hungry.
I don't know what the answer is but I do know that limiting Food Stamps and other Government aid any more than they already are is probably not the answer.
Maybe she didn't trust herself to make a cake for her friend maybe this friend was someone like me who always tries to be there and she wanted to do something special (sometimes my friend thinks I need grand gestures of appreciation) but whatever the answer I really wish some of you would get off your I-am-so-much-better soap boxes. No two situationsa are the same. I have read many a thread about people who don't understand or appreciate what we do. Why can't she be one of those people instead of someone trying to get someone trying to get something for nothing with your hard earned tax dollars?
Okay, i've read all posts on this subject. My husband and i were both on strike at the same time. Our kids never wanted for food, we fed them, if nothing was left, we simply didn't eat. When at Christmas time, we didn't have money for gifts, i wrapped plain packages with nothing in them, and put them under the tree. My kids strung popcorn, made homemade decorations with paper plates, etc. They seemed to understand at such an early age, that we still loved them. We could've wrapped up rocks, and they would have loved them. That comes from teaching our kids that expensive things didn't matter. When it came to birthday cakes, there's nothing wrong with a cake mix. I had my dignity, and still do. Today, my daughter is married to someone that had everything given to him. He buys shoes for 200 to 300 dollars a pair. My daughter buys 10 dollar shoes off the clearance rack for herself. I'm so proud of her, my heart is busting.
I work in a bakery, and see people come in and buy wedding cakes with food stamps. And that same person has cases of beer in their cart. The way i see it, if they can afford to pay for that beer in cash, they can afford food for their family. My own boss is a bakery manager, and lives with her parents . She is a single mom of two. She's on wick. She makes twice the amount and hour than i do. I bust my butt just to pay for my medicines. I will however, be the first one to help a needy person. But it really gets my goat when i drive an old beat up car, because i live within my means, and work hard....just to see someone dressed up better than me, and drive better vehicles that me, and pay for everything with food stamps. If they really need them, i'm all for it. But they should have a limit of how long they could be on them. They should have to actively seek employment, no matter how much it pays. Enough said from me on this subject. Congrats to the author of this thread, you have a good heart. Indy Deb, totally agree with you. You and i grew up the same way. Hope your life is better. I know my kids became better adults as a result of NOT having everything given to them. They work hard for their money, and provide for their families the best they can. Here's to all parents who taught their kids responsibility and respect ....
Quote OhMyGoodies
I don't think anyone here has a right to say what people can and can not spend their own money on. Once you pay your taxes it goes to the government, you can't tell them what to do with it, how to desperce it, or how much each welfare case should get because you're better off then they are.
Sure we have the right to disagree with how the government spends our tax dollars. I think that is what we should be doing...sending them information like what is being posted here.
I would like to see them set up programs to train the people to do for themselves. How to eat on a budget, how to sew and make your own clothes, how to grow and can their own food, how to bake and decorate their own cakes and how to have a fun party without spending a lot of money.
I would deffinately donate some of my time to work with a program like that. I would lots rather do that than hand over some of my hard earned money to let them buy as they please.
I know my kids became better adults as a result of NOT having everything given to them. They work hard for their money, and provide for their families the best they can. Here's to all parents who taught their kids responsibility and respect ....
I agree with what you are saying but I don't think you know how hard it is to learn these values if you HAVEN'T been taught. Do we sit back and watch their children loose out on that one meal a day in school (tax dollar subsidized) because their parents are too immature/selfish to understand that they are really buying that expensive cake ect. to make themselves feel better?
My son wants everything he sees and I have literally gotten into fights with his aunts, grandmother ect to keep them from buying him things everytime they see him. They grew up with very little and in their own way think they are shielding him from the pain of wanting more.
Maybe food stamps should come with nutrition classes or budgeting classes. I don't know. I also suspect I am saying some of the same things you guys are because I am also frustrated and upset by the lady that goes to get a custom cake made for $15 because she is on Food Stamps but I feel sorry for her because she probably doesn't have any idea the damage she is doing to herself, her child and the people around her. I sense that a lot of you feel nothing but contempt and distain and that saddens me even more.
Quote OhMyGoodies
I don't think anyone here has a right to say what people can and can not spend their own money on. Once you pay your taxes it goes to the government, you can't tell them what to do with it, how to desperce it, or how much each welfare case should get because you're better off then they are.
Sure we have the right to disagree with how the government spends our tax dollars. I think that is what we should be doing...sending them information like what is being posted here.
I would like to see them set up programs to train the people to do for themselves. How to eat on a budget, how to sew and make your own clothes, how to grow and can their own food, how to bake and decorate their own cakes and how to have a fun party without spending a lot of money.
I would deffinately donate some of my time to work with a program like that. I would lots rather do that than hand over some of my hard earned money to let them buy as they please.
Awsome! And the name of the workshop shall be : How to throw your kid a wonderful party on a very tight budget. I love it!
I don't think anyone here has a right to say what people can and can not spend their own money on. Once you pay your taxes it goes to the government, you can't tell them what to do with it, how to desperce it, or how much each welfare case should get because you're better off then they are.
In my 52 yrs. of life I don't think I have ever heard a statement like that.
I grew up dirt poor. My Mother would walk the distance to work to save 35 cent bus fare. She did without for me. She would have rather starved to death then to accept govt. help. I didn't get free lunches. You paid your way or did without. It's called Pride.
She taught me that you can't help where you come from but you sure can help where you are going. I worked hard to get somewhere.
And, now I am more than better off. I live the life that some can only dream of but, I did it. With hard work and a dream, I did it. I didn't get gov't help or student aid. Strength of my Mother's words. I only wish my Mother would have lived long enough to see how far I've come.
I want my tax dollars to go to schools and programs to teach those who are not as well off to provide for themselves. Not to buy store cakes and beer.
Yes, I am better off than others but, I earned it and resent my hard work going to those who want to sit on their duffs and let my money support them.
The first thing I want to see my tax money go to is health care and birth control.
And that's all I've got to say about that!
Oh i understand alot. My dad was an alcoholic and beat me everyday of my child life. I didn't let him break my spirit, even when i got my first job, and all he could say was, "When you gonna get a real job ?" I made more money than him. I remember as a child, my parents bought my sister and i a set of bunk beds. I also remember when they were late on making one of the payments, the store came and took them back. My father came to my graduation, i was the first to graduate, older sister and brother dropped out of school, He came drunk and passed out on the bleachers. The last two years of his life, i was the one who took care of him. You only have one set of parents. He died of cancer. Last year, my mom died, the surgeon came in and said, " I went in to do a biopsy on that last node, and bit a big chunk out of her aorta and she bled to death." Trust me, i know of heartache and doing without. My own husband went into the hospital yesterday, a blood clot went into his heart and nearly killed him. Thank god, he's doing better today. My point is, i would love to help anyone who needs it, but as they say, "God helps those who help themselves." If i was getting paid to sit around drinking beer, and i'm not saying everyone does this, i would LOVE to sit at home and do nothing. I know there are people who actually need welfare, and i'm all for them getting it, but seek a job, and give themselves a chance at self respect and a better life.
Well, I read the beginning of this earlier and came back to a ton of pages...seems people got a little upset here...
I'm not holier than thou, I struggle, like many, heck, I didn't even have electric for two months at one point in my life, BUT, I managed, without assistance....
I think the issue stems from so many people knowing at least one person who abuses the system. Not to be mean, but until you can afford something, don't buy it, and CERTAINLY don't expect someone else to GIVE it to you.
I have a co worker who started giving away her work, found all sorts of reasons why she couldn't do her job requirments, etc. My company has put up with it....Well, then she drops HERSELF down to one day a week, and files for unemployment....and GOT it. She's also on food stamps, etc. And boy I can tell you, this woman can work the system. Got a free chest freezer (why I don;t know when she says she has no food) and a free fridge, she has a new computer, postometer, etc. yet she goes to Sal Val to get help with her electric bill. She gets people to buy her food, or give her stuff, and doesn't really bother to say thank you...
YES, I have a problem that I have to bust my butt to barely make ends meet due to various issues going on right now, and she is taking hand outs...Thing is, I probably qualify for assistance, but I don't take it because I feel there are people out there who need it worse than I do....She apparently doesn't have that issue......
We all get upset when we do without because we can't afford something, then someone else just buys/gets it anyway and expects others to pick up the slack for them.....It's not right....
As embarrassing as it is to only give a $15 wedding gift to a dear friend, that is the way it is, and the friend should understand what the gift and the 15 meant to the giver if they are that tight on cash....They shouldn't expect to get a 100 cake for 15 just because they are on food stamps...why do people feel so entitled?
Quote OhMyGoodies
I don't think anyone here has a right to say what people can and can not spend their own money on. Once you pay your taxes it goes to the government, you can't tell them what to do with it, how to desperce it, or how much each welfare case should get because you're better off then they are.
Sure we have the right to disagree with how the government spends our tax dollars. I think that is what we should be doing...sending them information like what is being posted here.
I would like to see them set up programs to train the people to do for themselves. How to eat on a budget, how to sew and make your own clothes, how to grow and can their own food, how to bake and decorate their own cakes and how to have a fun party without spending a lot of money.
I would deffinately donate some of my time to work with a program like that. I would lots rather do that than hand over some of my hard earned money to let them buy as they please.
Awsome! And the name of the workshop shall be : How to throw your kid a wonderful party on a very tight budget. I love it!
OMG, you so struck a cord with me! I live in a upper middle class neighborhood, and I have a friend who spends THOUSANDS of dollars on parties for her kids. A month ago, she hired a Thomas train to take kids on rides throughout the neighborhood for a 1st birthday party. There were about 70 people crammed into their house. And they didn't hire me for the cake! 
They also spend about $20 per kid for goody bags.
Anyway, this is all fine and dandy, because it is their money, but she is always giving me a hard time because I like the old fashioned parties, cake and icecream and streamers, some friends and family. She's always saying "you could afford this if you wanted to". Again, I'm a SAHM, so I CANT. It's just so frustrating!!!!
...I believe we (as a society) have done our poor NO favor whatsoever by enabling this kind of attitude. The pride of pulling up your pants and making your own way is huge. I'm sorry so many people are cheated out of it by the system.
I could not agree more. I was a single mom so I worked two jobs to buy my house, car and all the things that my baby needed. I did not rely on ANYONE or ANY AGENCY to be responsible for me. I had a great family support system so my daughter never went to daycare. Now I am happily married with three children. I am now a SAHM. It is totally sickening how people with food stamps come into grocery stores and buy the best of everything and never worked for any of it. I do have a friend who gets foodstamps. It's not from not working though, she keeps foster kids. She can't buy any prepared foods at the grocery store only groceries that need to be cooked, so I didn't even know you could buy a cake with foodstamps.
I would understand if a parent were buying a cake with the last smidge of foodstamps, pennies,cashing in soda bottles, or whatever could be gotten for a child to have a wonderful memory of a birthday especially when the hard times are lengthy and there doesn't seem to be an end....
The woman was ordering a BABY SHOWER cake!!! not a bd cake! oh wait....the baby shower cake may have been for her own child....
If I couldn't afford it(and there were many years ...YEARS go by that I wasn't) creativity kicked in and that made its' own memories...
She is shocked and she says "Oh, you know what, I think I just need to learn how to make that myself."
on the other hand, perhaps this will indeed motivate her to learn, and not only will she value the labor much more, but perhaps she'll discover a new skill set and get herself off the foodstamps. Ya never know... we might be watching her on the Food Network five years from now, and she'll say she got her start when... 
Maybe I should've listened to my husband and kept my comments to my self. But I'm not saying I'm sorry for what I said. Basically I think everyone needs to quit being so damn judgemental of those who are less fortunate then them. I know for a fact that not everyone on the "system" gets money and food stamps... you get one or the other here in MD unless you meet certain quilifications and then ya get both... basically it boils down to how good you can kiss it...
I have to say that I'm appauld at the way some of you think and speak of people that are less then you. You can say that you don't think less of them because they aren't as good as you but your words state differently.
I grew up like most kids... my parents both worked hard 40 hours or more a week jobs that treated them like crap and they gave us what they could. We always had a hot meal on the table. When I was 13 we moved to a nicer/bigger house. We were blessed to be able to do so, now 15 years later... they are so far in the hole they are about to loose the house. My mother quit cooking for us when we moved and decided she didn't care about anything but working and sleeping and fighting with dad. I've watched them go thru good times and bad times and almost get divorced. And I've sat back and wondered "Why me?" Now that I'm a parent I see what they went thru. They went thru hell and back for us kids - 3 kids no help from the state no medical insurance no nothing. Now a days, I have full medical insurance for my daughter issued by the state because we fall into a lower income bracket not because we're poor but because we are under that bracket by get this... $5.00 lol. But it's not a matter of sitting on my ass when I can go to work. It wouldn't benifit us for me to go back to work, we paid more out between gas and day care and then the yearly tax return was so small we couldn't do anything with it at all when I worked. So I choose to stay home. Yes we struggle just like anyone else does.
Some people don't choose that life. Some people can't actually go out there and get a good job. Some people can't get a job to save their life. Some people have been to every single place in their town that's hiring including but not limited to McDonald's and still can't get a job. Why you ask? Not because I don't want to work, not because I won't take the pain I'd have to take just to stand there all day long, but because of my appearance. Because I'm a little over weight or because they don't like the look of my clothes or because of the color of my skin. (I'm white the majority of the people in our fast food places... mexican decent - no offense to ANYONE!) But I did notice someone that couldn't speak a lick of english got a job that I was turned down for, the reason they turned me down, "We found someone that is better qualified for the position" How is it someone that doesn't speak or understand a bit of english is better suited to say "would you like fries with that?" when they can't even speak english!?
So yeah not everyone that is on the state assistance programs can just walk out the door and find a job just like that.
All I can say right now after reading the post and all the different responses to this is it brings back a lot of sad memories for me from many years ago during my childhood.. I am trying to express how I feel about this topic, but am having diffuculty with my response right now because of the tears I am shedding, the shakiness of my hands and the rapid heartbeat while typing this. I am not gonna go into the details of my childhood, their is no need, but I am a firm believer in that everyone has a right to their own opinion and beliefs.Life would indeed be very boring if we all agreed with each other!
Having said that it makes me very sad and angry when people read this post and then just start assuming things about this women and making up " scenarios" about what her intetentions are! Only she knows what they are, this one human being could be perfectly innocent/unwittingly not have an understanding about what it costs/time etc... If that was the case then I would feel mortified(so would she) if she ever came across these posts/reply's that are judging her and putting her in a bad light. If not her then anyone in her position!
I feel real bad now the topic is called "Cheapscape Alert"
SummerNoelle, I am sorry your husband lost his job and I pray he finds another soon. Please dont let that stop you from giving your daughter a second birthday party. a Birthday party for a child does not have to be expensive/elaborate. "Birth"day is just that , celebrating the day of their birth with close family/friends who love them. Your good at making cakes and Im sure you can make her something very nice that does not have to be expensive. Children dont look at birthday cakes/party's and think, yeah my mom loves me cause she threw me an expensive party with a big elaborate cake, but they will look back at the memories and remember they were important enough and loved enough that you wanted to celebrate their "Birth" Sending prayers your way.
Ginnycakes3, thanks for your kind words. I hope we can still do her party. You are right-we might have to hold off on gifts, but I have to admit that I have been buying parts for the cake for a couple of months-the brick imprint mat, the little Dora princess figurines, sparkling sugar and luster dusts...We can still have people over to celebrate HER, not our current financial state.
Ohmygoodies- Do NOT keep your thoughts to yourself! You are entitled to them. Arguments like this go on everyday in the country-healthcare, immigration, etc, who we should support, who we shouldn't, why and why not.
On a side note: We were brought up that moms who made their kids' cakes cared more--lol. My mom always made our cakes--nothing like what I see on CC. It was your basic made from scratch(or a dr-ed mix) with plastic figures--little castle or cars or such. I remember all of them andhave picts--loved my brother's Snoopy house cake with a plastic snoopy on top. Very simple but memorable. I don't think I ever had a store bought cake. There were 6 of kiddos, times could be tough, never on assistance.
Maybe this lady just really wanted to do something to celebrate a miracle--the future birth of a precious little one. How many of us have gone into a shop, knowing darn well we could not afford a single thing, but wanted to kinda dream(granted she may have been wasting your time, I know) and hope just maybe we could actually afford something, just something so we could forget what social level we were.
I just worked volunteering at a Back to School thing--the parents came in and were given vouchers for school uniforms and could pick out gently used clothing for them and their kids. School supplies were all packaged--all new. I had never volunteered for this org before, but I will be back. Everyone was so nice to "these" people and I did not see anyone treat them as though they were poor--we were all the same, wanting the same thing. We searched for a pair of 36 pants for a 7th grader. When we FINALLY found a pair, he was soo thankful. I think they may have been Polo and he was thrilled. Hey we were all thrilled.
I just think we need to try to treat all people with some kind of respect, even if this woman was totally out o her league.
Once you pay your taxes it goes to the government, you can't tell them what to do with it, how to desperce it, or how much each welfare case should get because you're better off then they are. You can't stand in line at the store and critisize someone who uses a food stamps card in front of you and buys a 12 pack of Pepsi or Coke and ice cream. It's none of your business what they are spending THEIR money on.
OH. MY. GOD.
If they are on food stamps, IT IS NOT THEIR MONEY - IT WAS PARTLY MINE BEFORE THE GOVT TOOK IT AWAY FROM MY FAMILY!
My husband fell horrendously ill 10 years ago and was forced to quit working for a year to recover. We plummeted from a comfy 75K/yr to ZIP. We were young, and stupid, and living in the moment, so we didn't have a year's worth of expenditures in savings to carry us through a situation like that like we *should* have, because we never thought anything like that would happen to us. I was a SAHM to our 3 young children, all under the age of 6. For three months while he was most ill, we used food stamps. I would shop at 3AM because I was so disgusted to be receiving assistance, and was so glad when it was over with, he recovered, and we recovered financially. Thank GOD we survived!!
But even having been in a scary situation, I still have EVERY RIGHT to vote the way I want MY tax money used, how it is dispersed, and how it should be restricted. We work our ASSES off to pay thousands of dollars in taxes per year - and you bet I want a say-so in how that money is handed out.
I'm going to unsubscribe from this thread now because I came here to look at pretty cakes...not be nauseated. Sorry, I do have strong feelings on this subject and need to back away.
To the person who originally posted, I wish you good luck with your sticky cake situation.
I don't think anyone is against food stamps. It is the people who misuse them or use that as an excuse to get everything else handed to them.
I don't think they automatically DESERVE my respect...I think they can earn that by shopping wisely and keeping themselves clean.
I don't think they DESERVE to have things they cannot afford. I think they need to learn to live within their means.
I know several people who have very little money. They budget carefully and are very do it yourself. I respect them and would never put them down or think I am better than them.
I think it is wrong that we live in a society that we feel we have to have everything everyone else has. I drive a 1969 Chevelle and commute 20 miles to work every day. People ask me why I don't get a new car. I tell them I could not have bought my house if I did. I bought my first house with no down payment. I love my house I have now and my old car. I earned them.
Do people think they are better than me? No they don't. I show up at work every day, on time. I am clean and well groomed. I have a house....and I am a darned good cake decorator.
Even rich people admire me for what I have done.
I don't want to contribute to those who want it all handed to them because they DESERVE it.
Please don't tell me I have no right to be upset when someone wants something they have not earned.
I have never had a problem getting a job. Just make sure you can do something better than the rest, go in with enthusiasm and full of energy. If you have no skills...work on it. I practiced cake decorating for 10 hours a day for 2 weeks when I knew I wanted a bakery job. Be willing to work hard.
I think I will write a letter to the government now and tell them I think it is time we stopped catering to the, I want a handout people, and save the food stamps for those who really need them.
wow....
is this really all over that a person on foodstamps can order cake from the grocery store??? WTH do any one of you care...honestly.....I could see if this was about trading foodstamps for drugs....or cash to buy beer, liquor...but cake??? Cake.....not beer....not cigarettes....not crack....but cake. 
Not one person in this thread knows this womans situation....not even the original poster......this woman could be ANY one of you.....she couldve had it ALL two months ago....she couldve been accustomed to living high on the mountain so many in this thread seem to have built their house on.....she could've had this great life...great house...great car...wonderful husband who provided everything to and for her while she stayed home and cared for her children...and bam he;s gone....she struggles to keep life as normal as she can, but it falls right through her fingers.... and she has to resort to a goverment hand out ....with that said...she could also have had a horribly rough life...maybe some caused at her own hand...maybe not...she couldve been living a life of hellish ways none of us could ever imagine and is working hard to turn her life upright and has been doing very well with the help of the goverment hand out she has recieved.....either way its cake for foodstamps...grocery store cake that Ive seen many post about being bottom of the totem pole cake anyway.....
at least it isnt crack....at least it isnt liquor.....at least it isnt cigarettes.....its cake. Something that is suppose to make people happy....something that is fed as a dessert sometimes main course for special events.....something made to celebrate a special time
I agree that not one person here can give a reason for why she even stated she was on foodstamps....from what I read...she never asked to pay for the custom ordered cake with them.....maybe her friend mentioned one of the o.p's cakes and she wanted to do what she could to get her one...and the $15 is what she had to use...not everyone out there is as cake intelligent as all of you....in fact I am seriously SO SICK AND TIRED of reading the "hahaha can you believe this so and so wants to make her own cake"......or the...." does she honestly think she can make her own cake" comments
I find it not only rude....but extremely offensive.
I am by far up to par with several decorators on this site....but I also know that Im beyond just two 9in rounds and a can of icing.....but I wouldnt be even that far if I didnt think at one time....."I can decorate my own cake...the way I want it cake for less than what I'd pay for a grocery store cake more less a custom baker"......two years ago my son wanted a hamburger cake ...he was dead set on a hamburger cake.....he found one he loved on coolestbirthdaycakes.com or whatever it is.....when I called around I was one of those "silly stupid" people who was shocked at the cost....i thought...ummm 50 bucks for a cake?????....dont get me wrong the table has turned and it will come I want to charge 50 bucks ......but I definitely havent forgotten where I came from....and if I ever find myself laughing at someone shocked at the price...I'll go back to it being a hobby or just for my kids...I never want to be that decorator.
Whoa my eyes are sore from rolling them so much at the holier-than-thou folks!
There are something like 40 MILLION people living in poverty in America. Yet you all think, because you "know someone on foodstamps" or "seen someone shopping with foodstamps one time" that you know anything about these MILLIONS of people. Give me a break. And I get so sick and tired of hearing these people saying, "oh I saw someone buying lobster with foodstamps, it's not right I can't afford it". Well do you know that impoverished people SELL their foodstamps to pay for rent deposits, utilities, medical bills, toiletries, gas, etc? NOT everyone you see paying with foodstamps are actually the people ON foodstamps. THEY BOUGHT THEM! I have bought them before to help out my SIL that needed money for emergencies. So I could have been that person buying name brand groceries and driving away in my new car. Good grief all the judging that goes around. I especially love the lady that judged other single moms for living on foodstamps then goes onto say how her family helped support her and watch her kids so she didn't have to pay a babysitter. Lucky YOU! Not everyone has parents that can do that. Yet you think you are better than them? You didn't do it on your own either!
Wow this really brought out the true spirits of some people.
Now...this is getting funny.
It is soooooo illegal to buy food stamps from someone.
Took the words right out of my mouth! I don't care who it is or what the circumstances are.......it's illegal. I had an employee who wanted to buy the soda for my bar with her food stamps and then let me pay her half price in cash. Told her that in no way would I do that.
Diane
Now...this is getting funny.
It is soooooo illegal to buy food stamps from someone.
Took the words right out of my mouth! I don't care who it is or what the circumstances are.......it's illegal. I had an employee who wanted to buy the soda for my bar with her food stamps and then let me pay her half price in cash. Told her that in no way would I do that.
Diane
I think you guys are missing the point. Yes she engaged in illegal activity. Yes you did the right thing by not doing os yourself but she is trying to illustrate the fact that things aren't always as they appear. We are looking at a snap shot and making crazy assumptions about this woman's character, hygiene, intelligence ect. I think that is what she is trying to get people to focus on. Not her illegal activities.
wow....
is this really all over that a person on foodstamps can order cake from the grocery store??? WTH do any one of you care...honestly.....I could see if this was about trading foodstamps for drugs....or cash to buy beer, liquor...but cake??? Cake.....not beer....not cigarettes....not crack....but cake.
...and the $15 is what she had to use...not everyone out there is as cake intelligent as all of you....in fact I am seriously SO SICK AND TIRED of reading the "hahaha can you believe this so and so wants to make her own cake"......or the...." does she honestly think she can make her own cake" comments
I find it not only rude....but extremely offensive.
I am by far up to par with several decorators on this site....but I also know that Im beyond just two 9in rounds and a can of icing.....but I wouldnt be even that far if I didnt think at one time....."I can decorate my own cake...the way I want it cake for less than what I'd pay for a grocery store cake more less a custom baker"......two years ago my son wanted a hamburger cake ...he was dead set on a hamburger cake.....he found one he loved on coolestbirthdaycakes.com or whatever it is.....when I called around I was one of those "silly stupid" people who was shocked at the cost....i thought...ummm 50 bucks for a cake?????....dont get me wrong the table has turned and it will come I want to charge 50 bucks ......but I definitely havent forgotten where I came from....and if I ever find myself laughing at someone shocked at the price...I'll go back to it being a hobby or just for my kids...I never want to be that decorator.
BRAVO!
Our government approves of people buying cake for special occaisions with Food Stamps. They can't buy any other type of prepared food but they can buy CAKE. You would think people here would be more compassionate about someone feeling the need for a "special cake" for a celebration. OUR GOVERNMENT approves so why are we having so much trouble with it?
How do you guys know that she didn't have the cakes she was buying budgeted in? Maybe she was saving a dollar here and a dollar there for a year. Would that make it better for some of you? She obviously was working on a tight budget. She didn't say I bought my son's cake with Food Stamps and the sky is the limit for whatever you can create for me. She said I have $15 What can I get for $15 and then she said I will try to do it myself. Why isn't this another thread about some poor smuck thinking what we do is easy? Why isn't this yet another thread about the struggle to be sensitive to our customers but not sell ourselves short? I have a few suspicions and non of them are pretty.
Before this goes on into Saturday morning, let me add that I wasn't judging this woman. I wanted to work with her, was fine with doing something inexpensive (for cash, not stamps). I would never turn anyone away because of simplicity of design, and I don't have a min order amount. Also, when she asked for things that were out of her range, I never told her that it was too expensive for her, I just gently told her the cost and explained why (hand sculpted gumpaste flowers, and lost of them, tons of time) and then suggested something else. I spent 20 minutes with this woman on the phone.
I don't think anyone here was being snotty about whether or not she should make her own cake. In fact, someone earlier on applauded that, because who knows? She could make a business from it, just like we all want to!
A lot of people here with customers have gotten frustrated because someone doesn't want to pay them, or has made the comment that they can make it themselves. There is nothing wrong with having pride in your work and getting frustrated when someone assumes that it is super simple and they can just pick it up in no time flat.
I happen to think most people can learn how to do this if they want to-so more power to them-but they can't do it on a Friday evening the night before a birthday party. I think that was all anyone was saying.
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