The Bride Is Going To Be Upset But....
Decorating By Lazy_Susan Updated 18 Sep 2007 , 7:41am by Hollyanna70
The Bride of a wedding cake I am supposed to be doing for this coming Saturday is going to be upset because I sent her an email that I am not going to do her cake. And here is the story why I am not going to be doing it.... You tell me... am I right for not doing it?
Right from the get go she was pretty flaky. Some of you may remember me asking about an "Infinity Symbol" wedding cake. Well, luckily she changed her mind about wanting that! She decided to instead go with a cake to replicate her gown. I figured that would be fun 
She sent me a picture of her dress and it was nothing but a bunch of ruffles from top to bottom. I figured I would just cover the cake in ruffled fondant from top to bottom. She paid her deposit when she and her fiance came over for our meeting (which we had to reschedule several times due to her not showing up or calling the other times our meeting was scheduled. One time I sat her ALL day waiting for her to show up or at least call. AND I called her and emailed her to see if she was going to show up and had no reply) Anyway, when they came over they had their new little baby with them. My heart went out to them and I told her I would do their cake to feed 130 people for only $300. Basically, I dropped my charge for the fondant and lowered my per piece price. She left a deposit and they left.
Well, 4 days ago I called her because I need the remainder of the money. She apologized and said she meant to give it to me. I told her not to worry and just drop it in the mail to me (remember there is only a week and a half before her wedding). She insisted that she would just give the check to the brother of the bride whose wedding I was doing this past Friday (I was also a guest at the wedding). I told her again to just mail me the check but she insisted to give it to the brother. I had no choice and agreed to just get it at the other wedding. I, also, asked her for a back up design for her cake in case I was having difficulty getting the fondant to ruffle. She said that she and her fiance had decided to not use the fondant at all. They just wanted a chocolate cake with some "swirly things on the sides". I asked her if she had a picture that she could send me and she said yes. After our conversation, I emailed her with 2 pictures of what I thought she was talking about and asked her if this was the design she wanted. It's been 4 days now and I still have not recieved an email back from her nor has she sent me the pictures of the design she wants. Plus, wouldn't you know it! She didn't give the brother of the bride the check! She never even mentioned anything to him about it.
It's now 7 days until her wedding. I have no idea what she wants for her cake design and she owes me for half. I'm sorry... did I say half?? I forgot to mention that when I talked to her about the change to her cake she mentioned that I charge extra for fondant (which I usually do). Without thinking, I told her that I charge .50 per person for fondant and so she was going to deduct $65 from what she owes me. After our conversation I thought to myself that I never charged her for the fondant! Since I already told her I would accept it I figured I would just eat it and lose money on this cake. But now since I can't even get a silly email from her when her wedding is in 7 days, I just don't want to do it at all. I'd be afraid that after the wedding she would find something wrong and be my first "Bridezilla"! She knows that I work a fulltime job at the hospital and I just don't have time for all this. I like to have things planned out. I don't mind changes but come on! At least email me with the changes that you want! I'm not a psychic!!
Am I wrong or am I right? What would you have done? I feel so bad and at the same time I feel so relieved. Does that makes sense?
Lazy_Susan
She is definitely flaky-probably trying to plan a wedding on a very small budget, and yet wants everything that "everyone else" has. I would feel a little sorry for her too, but that's why it's easy for people to take advantage if we let them. I would hate for her to not have a cake, but she has not given you another choice. Tell her she's going to have to go to Walmart.
In our area of the country I walk into many businesses that have a sign on the door "We have the right to refuse service to anybody." I think you have the same right in this case due to the inability of the bride to give you the needed information and money for you to complete HER order. Thankfully (for her) there are grocery stores who can provide her a cake that they choose the design on in the timeframe she has left. I, personally, think I would have done the same thing you did were I in your shoes.
You are totally in the right....no question about it.
wants everything that "everyone else" has.
You are so right. The bride of the wedding that I just did said that this girl has used everything and everyone that she has used for her wedding. It's like she was planning her wedding through this other bride. But they obviously don't have the money like the other couple. I still feel bad but I just don't want to get mixed up in this.
She's obviously not interested or serious about her wedding cake-- would she do this about her own gown? Would she avoid putting down her final payment and a week before the wedding change her mind but not tell the seamstress what she wants done to her gown? Would she let the clock run down before doing something? Chances are, no- but brides are weird about cakes at times.
You have been very lenient with her- she missed tastings with you, you gave her a discount, and then even after that she tried to take advantage of you and get an even bigger discount behind your back? She's changed the design of the cake and can't even be bothered to you show you, her baker?! That's not the way things work and frankly, a bride like that doesn't deserve your hard-work.
Lazy Susan....
Easy.
Dear (insert Losers name here),
Please find enclosed the return of your deposit for a wedding cake.
Unfortunately, I am unable to assist you with your request and I apologise for any inconvenience caused.
Yours Sincerely,
Lazy Susan.
That's it - send it and let her go and move on to someone who is dead set serious in ordering a cake from you and has a plan that you can rely on and get paid for.
Good Luck.
Nope, you're not wrong. Most professional members here agree with the term of full payment within two weeks of the event, or no cake, and no deposit back.
Theresa
No money, no design = no cake.
She didn't sign anything, and neither did you - you are not obligated to make the cake for the flake! And don't even THINK about refunding a deposit! That deposit held the date so that you would have to turn other PAYING business away.
Sure she will get mad, blame you, and so on. That's what flakes do! Good luck with it all and keep us posted. 
You go girl! Now, I'm guessing that THIS e-mail might get her attention so make sure you let us know what she says. I'm dying to hear her pleas & excuses to convince you to do her cake...lol
Tammi
This sounds like the post on etiquitte hell. As I remember it, the woman attended a friends wedding only to find out that the friend had copied HER wedding right down to the program....all she changed was the date and the names. Even used her thank you to family and friends...word for word.
Talk about no imagination. 
No contract....no cake.
mommachris
I agree, no money then no cake. To me it's to late to get the money now. Why should you have rush out to buy the stuff, bust your rear to get everything done just because she now wants her cake. Sorry. Not in on time then no cake!
I also agree, no deposit back. That deposit is to hold the date open for her.
I totally agree with everyone. No cake and definately no deposit back. After all you left your time open for her when you could have taken an order for someone that would have been a serious customer.
You did the right thing.
I wouldn't do this cake either.
BUT......... you put yourself in this situation. By waiting around and rescheduling and underpricing yourself etc, you acted much less than professional. Of course if you don't act like a professional people are less likely to treat you as such.
[quote="mezzaluna"]I wouldn't do this cake either.
BUT......... you put yourself in this situation. By waiting around and rescheduling and underpricing yourself etc, you acted much less than professional. Of course if you don't act like a professional people are less likely to treat you as such.
OUCH!
Don't know if I agree with that scathing review, but just move on...no deposit return and no beating yourself up. Live and learn.
I wouldn't do this cake either.
BUT......... you put yourself in this situation. By waiting around and rescheduling and underpricing yourself etc, you acted much less than professional. Of course if you don't act like a professional people are less likely to treat you as such.
I respect your opinion. Everyone is entitled to one.
UPDATE
Now as for the customer's response to my email...
She blew it off as if I never sent it to her. She sent me two emails back. The first was a "forwarded" email that had my email address wrong that contained the 2 pictures she wanted me to see. In this forwarded email she said that she wanted to see "if" I could do one of these cakes before she paid me the rest of the money. Give me a break! The Wedding is in 7 days!!! "IF" So "if" I can't do one of them she isn't going to pay me? LOL Fine... I can't do them
Then she sent another email with a picture of the cake that Duff's team did that had all those verticle fondant stripes on it. Now... I would love to attempt that cake but not with only a couple of days notice. In the first email the pictures were of these very elaborate cakes that would take quite some time to make and ALOT more money.
She never even acknowledged the email that I sent to her saying that I wasn't going to be doing her cake.
So I sent her another email reinforcing the fact that I will not be doing her cake. And I advised her that she still has time to order a cake from one of the grocery stores or WalMart if she does it ASAP. I hope she takes me advice because if she doesn't she isn't going to have a cake.
I, also, told her in the email that I no longer feel comfortable with the trust in this arrangement. Which is very true.
[quote="mezzaluna"]I wouldn't do this cake either.
BUT......... you put yourself in this situation. By waiting around and rescheduling and underpricing yourself etc, you acted much less than professional. Of course if you don't act like a professional people are less likely to treat you as such.
OUCH!
Don't know if I agree with that scathing review, but just move on...no deposit return and no beating yourself up. Live and learn.
I agree, NanaFixIt, OUCH! Like it has been said, this is a learning experience and I believe you made the right decision to not do this cake. After having recently done my very first wedding cake (non-paid for a family member), I see what work goes into these wedding cakes. The time involved, the stress to make it just right, everything involved makes this a very big deal to wedding cake decorators. I told myself if I ever decided (one day) to take on making wedding cakes for extra money, it would have to be well worth it--not undercutting myself for sure because they are a lot of work! And if you have an uncooperative bride, I would do the same and not do the cake--not worth the stress. Your time is way too valuable.
I too tatally agree with you, she's just out to get you, come on a wedding cake is most important thing of the wedding, so if she;s not interested then hey not your fault, you did the right thing, hope you're not returning herdeposits as in my view she;s wasted lots of your time, you could have had another wedding cake order for that week you jnow and then what??
cheers
Naz
I always state:
"Deposit of $50 is required to secure the date. It is non refundable except on special circumstances"
I have had one bride email me "Oh my apologies but I forgot to send you the deposit" That was supposed to be 2 months ago. Unfortunately I had to email her to say I was now fully booked. She replied that she was very disappointed in me seeing as I had penciled her in and taken all her particulars. Also wanted to know why I had not contacted her. I replied I did not contact brides who had not paid their deposit as I didn't want to embarrass them or myself in case they had decided not to use my services. And she knew the rule and it was her forgetfulness that caused the situation.
I definitely would not do this cake. You don't need the hassle.
I wouldn't do this cake either.
BUT......... you put yourself in this situation. By waiting around and rescheduling and underpricing yourself etc, you acted much less than professional. Of course if you don't act like a professional people are less likely to treat you as such.
I respect your opinion. Everyone is entitled to one.
I agree, everyone is entitled to one, and it's wonderful of you to respect that one, but... That doesn't mean everyone has to voice their opinions, especially negative ones.
After all, mama always said, if you can't say anything nice.. etc. etc. etc. blah blah bah.. you know the rest. 
I wish you the best of luck on this, and I hope you're happy with any decision you make. You're one heck of a lady.
Good luck!
Holly
(psst.. Briarview, love the name. My son's name is Briar, so it makes me think of him every time I see it, and puts a smile on my face. )
I knew I was going to get flak when I wrote that.
It was my first reaction to reading the original post. My first thought.... maybe if she hadn't allowed thse people to walk all over her the situation would have been a different on.
And Hollyanna, just because it is a negative opinion doesn't necessarily mean that I have to hold it in. Playing the *mama says....* card is just plain cheap.
Just because I had an opinion that no one else had doesn't mean I shouldn't be allowed to voice it. Or maybe there is a rule somewhere here that says that if one doesn't agree with the thread owner 110% that one isn't allowed to answer.
Sheesh. Some people.
It'll be interesting to see how the couple reacts when it finally sinks in that they have to order a grocery store cake.
I knew I was going to get flak when I wrote that.
It was my first reaction to reading the original post. My first thought.... maybe if she hadn't allowed thse people to walk all over her the situation would have been a different on.
And Hollyanna, just because it is a negative opinion doesn't necessarily mean that I have to hold it in. Playing the *mama says....* card is just plain cheap.
Just because I had an opinion that no one else had doesn't mean I shouldn't be allowed to voice it. Or maybe there is a rule somewhere here that says that if one doesn't agree with the thread owner 110% that one isn't allowed to answer.
Sheesh. Some people.
It'll be interesting to see how the couple reacts when it finally sinks in that they have to order a grocery store cake.
As I said before, I respect your opinion. So for everyone... Lets please not turn this thread into an argument. Right now I need the support of everyones opinions.
Thank you,
Lazy_Susan
Definately run as fast as you can in the opposite direction! As far as heading this off at the pass in the future, I would give a lot of thought into writing up some sort of contract. It will just give you something to stand on if or when this happens again (God willing, it won't!). It also makes bride's realize that you are a business like everyone else they are dealing with. I'm sure they didn't mess around like that with the reception hall or the DJ! She has still broken your verbal contract so don't look back. Print off those e-mails you sent, put it all in a file and put it away! Good luck! -Lori
I agree, I would not do this cake at all!! She's been flaky from day 1 what tells you that when you deliver the cake she would find something wrong with it. Just by giving you the run around to get your money, I would drop her!!!!
It's sad, people don't realize we have to purchase supplies and prepare ourselves at least 1 week prior , no one is going to replace your $$$ or time.
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