No More Cake Decorating For Me!?!?!

Decorating By suzyqqq27 Updated 31 Mar 2005 , 3:34am by galaglow

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suzyqqq27 Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 7:08am
post #1 of 21

Hi all,

I was making a cake for my nephew while my husband was watching our girls. He went to the washroom and I was at the sink cleaning up when my daughter Sydney (2 years old) got into my icing. She loves the colours. By the time I got to her she was covered with icing and hives...she's very allergic to eggs. I got her wiped off and had her epipen at the ready but the Benadryl fastmelts worked before anything terrible happened.

Anyway, my husband doesn't want me baking/decorating any more cakes at home. icon_cry.gif I love doing this and I know it was a terrible mistake but I don't want to quit. I've always been very careful with the eggs when handling them at the baking stage and get rid of the shells and anything they've touched right away but wasn't as concerned with the icing...apparently it's just as bad. Do most of your buttercream recipes have meringue powder in them? Do you know what the meringue powder is for? Can I leave it out?

He's really mad at me but perhaps if I came up with something sans eggs or meringue he'd let me continue.

Personally I don't think she'll ever touch it again. When we had cake later that night, she didn't want any. Usually we have to give her the "eggs are dangerous for Sydney" speech and let her have a different treat. This time she said right away, "I don't like cake!" I think the episode made her feel so bad (ingestion makes her vomit) that she won't go near any icing again...not that I would let her.

Please help,
Suzanne M.

20 replies
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PurplePetunia Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 7:58am
post #2 of 21

I'm really sorry about what happened. Maybe after some time passes, your husband will change his mind. I can sympathize because my girls have the nut allergy, and I bake cakes with nuts. thumbsdown.gif

By all means, in my opinion, you can leave out the meringue powder. I don't use it in my buttercream (half butter, half sugar and milk to thin) and I don't have any problems.
I find that the icing still does crust. The only time you might want to use the meringue is for doing roses and then you can air dry them. Other than that, I don't use it anymore since I finished my Wilton classes.

Take heart!! I'm sure your husband will understand how much you love your girls and how much you love cake decorating. I'm sure you'll both be on high alert from now on, too!! icon_smile.gif

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blessBeckysbaking Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 8:20am
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I'm so sorry that happen but the mp is just for the crusting and if you use more shortening then butter instead of 50/50 it crusts and smooths great. ioly use mp for royal icing. be blessed

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diane Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 9:43am
post #4 of 21

so sorry about your daughter. i'm allergic to milk products. i have an epipen on hand at all times. i've never had to use it so far. i get like that when i accidentally have something with milk in it. as far as the icing goes, eggs can be left out. i have never used eggs in my icing and it always crusts.

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flayvurdfun Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 11:57am
post #5 of 21

My icing isnt with eggs either.... and it also crusts.. I am so sorry things happened, but I am so glad nothing serious happened. For safe keeping, I even checked all the ingredients to make sure they didnt contain eggs... they dont. I am sure things would be ok if you continue to decorate.

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thecakemaker Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 2:10pm
post #6 of 21

That's terrible! There are so many icing recipes out there and many of them don't require meringue powder. Like you said - she probably won't touch your icing again and everything turned out ok. That's no reason to give up something you love. You probably all learned to be more careful and she will have to learn that there are some things that she can't have. My son's 1st sitter was at her wits end with him wanting to touch the oven whenever she baked something. I finally told her to let him touch it (on the outside where it was warm but wouldn't hurt him) and tell him "hot" so he would know what hot meant. He never touched it again when she told him hot. Maybe this will work the same way for you and your daughter. Good Luck to you and i'm glad everyone is ok!


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tcturtleshell Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 5:40pm
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I'm sorry about your daughter. Thank God she's ok. She will probably never get into things in the kitchen again. I'm sure you & your hubby had words so that probably made her feel a little bad about the whole ordeal. She'll understand not to get into things again.

Please don't let your hubby make you give up decorating! It means so much to you! Just assure him that you will be more careful & that he also has to be more careful.. he was watching them right? Remind him of that..

As for the meringue powder you don't need it unless your making roses or royal icing. Put it up in the cabinet & not worry about it! If you make a stiff enough icing you won't need it for roses.

I will say a prayer that things will come to a happy end!! We're all rooting for you!!! Don't quit!!! Hang in there! ~Tina~

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Ladycake Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 5:46pm
post #8 of 21

Sorry to hear about all of this..

Would there happen to be a way that your able to put a gate up for in the kitchen for when your making cakes that she cant get in there.. This way you will still be able to do it...

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Scott1004 Posted 19 Mar 2005 , 6:45pm
post #9 of 21

If you want to try replacing the eggs in your baking, you could try searching online for vegan cake recipes. These will be egg-free and are often better than the egg-included recipes!


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Chocophiliac Posted 20 Mar 2005 , 12:45am
post #10 of 21

Hi folks......
I don't really post on here but read this topic & had to. These kind of posts just get me so riled up!

This is totally ridiculous! First of all, I'm very glad your daughter is ok and thank goodness a disaster was averted with her medicine. But having said that, your husband sounds like a giant a$$. HE was supposed to be watching them so when she got into the icing it's all your fault!?! Now you aren't ALLOWED to make cakes anymore? Nice relationship. Who's he to tell you what you're allowed to do? So you're being punished because he made a mistake? How 'bout this: how about HE is not ALLOWED to have any eggs in the house at all because your daughter is allergic? See how he likes that! She could just as easily have gotten into his scrambled eggs or whatever when he got up to go to the bathroom & didn't watch her.

If he was truly that concerned there wouldn't be eggs in the house at all.
But that isn't the case because we all keep things in the house that could be a danger to children one way or the other, whether it be they're allergic or it's just a general danger. The point is, you keep the little ones away from those dangers.

But nope, this guy throws a temper tantrum at you when he messes up. Tell the baby to grow up, or send him my way so I can tell him what he can do with his eggs.

Again, glad your daughter is ok.

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briansbaker Posted 20 Mar 2005 , 2:13am
post #11 of 21

First things first..Thanks god Sydney is ok.. And I too had to carry a epipen. Allergy unknown. Just out of the blue I will swell up like a toad frog. hehe FYI never let mother-in-law stick you with a epipen..OUCH!!! $#@$#
Wow Chocophiliac you really had some opinion..hehe Hope you never run into this poor man!! suzyqqq27 If I were you I would keep hubby under cover until you know who icon_mad.gif cools off..
You know it was an accident. You cannot keep the children accident free. But you know $hit happens. Dang I am sure you felt bad enough, to top it off he's mad at you. Well I just have to say that if I were in your shoes I would try to talk to him in a good way and tell him how sorry you are and start crying you a$$ off. Just because from experience that works everytime. icon_twisted.gif And tell him you will be more cautious next time and that he needs to let you know when he will not be watching them. Because obviously kids are very fast and accidents happen so fast. Make him a I'm sorry, Your sorry, Sidney's ok , GET OVER IT cake..hehe

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suzyqqq27 Posted 20 Mar 2005 , 7:05pm
post #12 of 21

Thank you all for your responses.

Unfortunately I can't gate off my kitchen...we have an open concept house and it's too wide an opening to gate...otherwise I already would have. Good suggestion though.

Secondly, hubby has cooled off a fair bit. However, I don't think I put him in a fair light judging by some of the reply posts. He is under the impression that he shouted, "watch the kids for a second" or something of that nature when he went to the bathroom but I was running water at the sink and didn't hear him. It was an honest mistake.

Also, he is VERY vigilant about the egg thing and he won't eat any eggs...he'd never eat scrambled eggs around Sydney or even when she isn't around. He would actually prefer it if I got rid of every egg containing thing in the house but that isn't very practical. After he eats baked goods that contain eggs, he washes up and brushes his teeth before handling her. It's actually a bit over the top but that's how careful he is.

Things don't come off well on paper /computer screen sometimes like how you mean. I wasn't meaning to say that, "my man won't let me do something that I want to do" grunt, grunt caveman type of stuff. I was upset because there was an accident and he was thinking that I was being negligent. We make an okay income between the two of us (I'm on maternity leave right now) so the cake decorating isn't necessary...just something I really, his thinking was that I should can it to keep her safe.

We're still discussing this now and I appreciate all your help. I just didn't want you thinking my husband was some sort of conservative neanderthal.

Suzanne M.

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tcturtleshell Posted 20 Mar 2005 , 7:27pm
post #13 of 21

Oh, Suzy I didn't think anything bad about your hubby. I have one too & I know how they can be LOL!! You were just venting to us. I'm glad you shared this with us. Things happen. It will all turn out good in the end.

I had my sisters kids over yesterday. We decorated Easter cookies. My nephew is 3. He got his arm stuck in the chair he was sitting in. It was an accident.. we couldn't have prevented it. We got his arm out he cried a little & it was over. We went back to decorating.

You have to do what you have to do for your family~ We are not here to judge you! Sorry if my post came across at a judgemental post. ~Tina~

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Mchelle Posted 21 Mar 2005 , 3:36pm
post #14 of 21

I am so glad that your daughter is okay.PHEW!!!! I know that it was scary for you both. Hopefully you will find a recipe with no eggs in it and get back to the fun stuff. Hope everything works out.

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m0use Posted 21 Mar 2005 , 4:07pm
post #15 of 21

Very glad to hear your daughter got better. It sounds like your husband got like how my husband gets when something happens to our son- a little bit of a overreaction because of the situation as a whole. (Yes, I know the egg allergy is very serious.)
What I would do is find some icing recipes that don't require meringue powder (there are sooo many out there), then sit down with your husband to have a nice talk. Apologize to him about the situation (even if you are not at fault) and tell him that you found some icing recipes that don't need meringue powder and that will no longer put your daughter at risk. Also explain to him that since you found these recipes that you should be allowed to go back into decorating since you plan on using all kinds of precautions for your next cake.
Also have you and your husband and sit down with your daughter and talk to her. Even though she is 2, they take in more than some adults give 2 year olds credit for. Talk to her and make sure she understands that she can't touch Mommy's cake when she is baking and decorating because if she does she will get sick like last time. I am sure she will remember quite well what happened to her. After you talk to her make sure she understands the lesson, like, "Do you think you should touch mommy's cakes anymore?" (her reply would hopefully be no) and then say "Is that because you can get really sick if you do?" (hopefully her reply will be yes)
But how you handle the situation is up to you since you are the parent. I'm just offering my 2 cents since I am a parent as well (who has had her own share of scares) and do not mean to offend you.

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estherhead Posted 21 Mar 2005 , 4:10pm
post #16 of 21

I've been lurking but I just had to offer a bit of support since I cake decorate and have tiny tots myself. This is neither dh nor your fault. It isn't your fault. Tots are explorers and can't help it. It is no different than if she got into the medicine cabinent and took bad medicine and you had to rush her to the ER, which believe me I have both been to the ER (blood in urine from bladder infection), called an ambulance (daughter swallowed newspaper rubber band and stopped breathing,) and called poison control (bottle of SEALED Nyquil in VERY high cabinent that she climbed to get and figured out how to open!) We can only be so careful but it is a big bad world out there and they will have to figure it out sooner or later. And it is better sooner under the watchful eye of both mommy and daddy (who have things to save their lives at home.) And both dh and I have yelled at the other for seeming miscalculations but we both realize later when we've calmed down that we over reacted. It sounds like you guys have worked it out. But I agree with everyone in finding away around her allergies instead of giving up what you love.

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kate Posted 21 Mar 2005 , 5:33pm
post #17 of 21

You don't need the meringue powder in your frosting unless you are making royal icing. I've never used it in my buttercream and it works fine. Here's the recipe:
1/4 c. butter
8 heaping T crisco
1/2 c milk
flavorings to taste
cream these together then add 2 lbs. powdered sugar slowly, when combined beat for five minutes on high. You can adjust the milk up or down depending on what you are using it for.
Don't beat yourself up too much over the accident with your daughter. Everyone who has children can tell you of some accident that happened with them when they were that age. My oldest pulled a very hot cup of water down on his arm and burned it pretty badly when he was two. I had put it way out of his reach, or so I thought, and he got it anyway. They are so fast at that age and there is no way you can protect them from everything. Needless to say, I cried and cried and the nurse at the emergency room had to calm me down and tell me it was not my fault. Your daughter is fine and that shows what good parents she has. Your husband will realize he over-reacted, but show him the recipe with no egg products in it to ease his mind. And enjoy your cake decorating! Let your little one use the frosting with no eggs, she'll have fun with mom and you'll have lots of good memories.

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ump107 Posted 30 Mar 2005 , 9:45am
post #18 of 21

suzyqqq27 I am glad your daughter is ok allergies can be scary to everyone involved.

I know I am bumping a 9-day-old topic however Food allergies are close to home for me. I am allergic to nuts, legumes, and many other ingredients including Soy, and Carrots. Everywhere I go both Benadryl and 2 Epi-Pens go with me, I am fortunate that I am not so sensitive to allergens that I cannot be in the same room as them but if I have to bake or cook with anything I am allergic to I wear gloves are worn. I currently wear Non-latex gloves because my mother-in-law is allergic to latex (No Precaution is to Great). One thing that I do is list all ingredients used in all of my recipes and bring it with me to parties gatherings ect. That way the guests can review the ingredients that I used in case they have allergies. And as a small side note 99% of the boxed cake mixes and even Crisco has Soy in it. For cakes and food I am going to eat I have resorted to making all of my cakes from scratch and I found a shorting that is not made with Soybean oil.

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juliet Posted 30 Mar 2005 , 2:54pm
post #19 of 21

Hello. Just a little word to say that I didn't think your husband was being an a$$ at all. Sounds to me like he just got really scared for your little girl, and who wouldn't? However it was an accident and once he has cooled down, I'm sure you guys will figure it out. There are a lot of good egg free cakes and icing to be made out there! One of my best friends is vegan and they have really good options now.

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m0use Posted 30 Mar 2005 , 3:20pm
post #20 of 21

suzy~ Glad to see your back. thumbs_up.gifparty.gif

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galaglow Posted 31 Mar 2005 , 3:34am
post #21 of 21

I'm glad to hear your daughter is ok. I'm new but I wanted add my two bits. I've had food allergies all my life and have to be very careful, mine is nuts, oranges, etc. some things are easier to avoid than others. With something like eggs I wonder if removing them from your home altogether is a good idea...since she'll have to learn what foods are safe for her. Not at two years old, of course, but soon she'll be making food choices on her own and will need to be aware what to look out for.

I'm happy to hear your husband takes it seriously. Some people do not. My mother in law just about sent me to the Emergency Room by neglecting to tell me she had substituted orange marmalade for apricot jam in her Easter bread this year!

Don't beat yourselves up. Mistakes happen and she was lucky you knew how to manage it.

I agree it would be a shame to give up something you love, but if it comes to that, you may only have to give it up til she's a little older. Often children grow out of some allergies...hopefully this will be the case for your daughter icon_smile.gif

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