What If You Know A Cake Will Be Ugly?
Decorating By pouchet82 Updated 9 Aug 2013 , 4:13pm by smittyditty

Pouchet82, you my friend, are a saint! Had it been a regular client, you would not have had the stress and bullsh%t involved and I'm sure you've pulled out your hair over this... just the design alone! Anyway, her cake will be as tacky as she. I am not yet licensed (working on it and other things involved) so all the cakes I do are for cost only. I spend A LOT of time working on my cakes (have not done a wedding cake yet), I cannot imagine making a cake like that and actually being allowed to be paid and then receive treatment like that. O'well... I look at it as one less free cake to make and two less birthdays to remember.

AWhat a mess. The bride apologized to me profusely and told me how much she appreciated that this gift was coming from the heart, and still wanted us at the wedding and wanted the cake, then her fiancé tells me he ordered a cake this afternoon. Now the question is, will they make it to the wedding, or will it get called off??? It's revenge of the drama llama

ADO NOT go to the wedding, and definitely don't buy them a gift unless it's a copy of Emily Post.


I would still go as a guest, if for no reason but the see the cake, and see if I could figure out how much money they spent.... BWwahahaha!




What a mess. The bride apologized to me profusely and told me how much she appreciated that this gift was coming from the heart, and still wanted us at the wedding and wanted the cake, then her fiancé tells me he ordered a cake this afternoon. Now the question is, will they make it to the wedding, or will it get called off??? It's revenge of the drama llama
What a mess indeed! The fiance' is willing to pay someone else to do the cake but you were suppose to do it for free? i don't think Emily Post could help them.


I thought I would update everyone on the change of events with this cake. The groom, who is very good friends with my husband, texted him saying that we should be giving the wedding cake to them as their gift. Yes, a cake to serve 270 people for free. The last time I checked, a cake that costs zero dollars has zero servings. I had told them all along how much it would cost, now suddenly they're telling us how much we should give as a gift. I was so upset and disgusted that I told my friend she can go to a bakery and find someone else to make her cake. Needless to say I am no longer invited to the wedding (insert bridezilla emoticon here).
I'm furious. Apparently when making a cake for a friend, even if your husband is in the wedding party, you still need a contract and a deposit. Lesson learned.
I'm still reading comments. On this one I totally support you. I was sitting here thinking to myself there is no way I would do a cake for someone so ungreatful. We are talking about an $800 (low-end) cake. I can't wait for her to go to a bakery and find out what they "can't" do for her and how much. That was some nerve for them to want it as a gift.

I would NOT go to the wedding. DO NOT MAKE THE CAKE.
Someone else can take a picture of the cake and post on facebook. Her behavior was horrible. Yes I accept apologies, but she is obviously only had a change of heart because she now realizes the cost of the cake.
Simply put just say that you made other plans and that your life "doesn't change on at the drop of a dime." yes thats a pun and yes its intended..
I would not let my husband go either.
She stood her ground and made your life miserable she can now reap her rewards.

A
Original message sent by pouchet82
What a mess. The bride apologized to me profusely and told me how much she appreciated that this gift was coming from the heart, and still wanted us at the wedding and wanted the cake, then her fiancé tells me he ordered a cake this afternoon. Now the question is, will they make it to the wedding, or will it get called off??? It's revenge of the drama llama
Is she still expecting that the cake would be their gift?

AYes I agree. Send a card with the printed out amazon page of the emily post book.

AI apparently have no heart now too. After being a supportive friend through her struggles with infertility, getting her doctors appointments she would have not gotten otherwise, and supporting her fiancé through a cancer diagnosis, I have no heart. I'm hurt beyond words. They are the two most ungrateful spoiled princesses in the face of the earth, and they totally deserve each other. So not worth my tears, but yet I can't stop crying

Well its very understandable why you are crying. You know you aren't like that. It hurts to have someone say such awful things that aren't true. You aren't crying over them you are crying because they have emotions toward you that you try to avoid. Hence the reason you have a heart and did all those wonderful things for them. So just know that what you are feeling is not a reflection of you its just bad people. You did everything right and they just suck. All of us in this thread have shown you that. We don't need to know you as personally as those two to know you are nothing like what they have said. You are not out of line to have asked what you did. Friendships are equal, not givers and sponges. Hold your head up and wipe those tears, do not let them get the best of you.


AJust be glad you found this out before giving up all your free time and money on a cake they wouldn't have appreciated any more than all the other very generous and thoughtful things you've done for them. People like that are not qualified to say who is and isn't a good person.

AI missed something... in post 61 the bride apologized profusely and wanted you both at the wedding. Now you have no heart...what happened in between? It seems a shame to lose a long and close friendship over a cake. I hope you can dry your tears and blame their actions on wedding nerves and attend the wedding and wish them well. Clearly your relationship will have changed over this but hopefully you can remain friendly after having gone through so much together. Oh and do not consider for a second making the cake.

Obviously the cake they ordered was a lot more than they anticipated (market value), putting the true value on the gift you were GOING to give them. Reality bites!
I sincerely hope you aren't going to do the cake.
The fact that she is groveling (sp?) now means she still wants her free cake. Would she have apologized otherwise? I question that.

Maybe the bride apologized but the groom was too prideful to say sorry. The OP did say the groom ordered a cake maybe he was snotty to the OP.
The OP then says she isn't making the cake and the bride says she has no heart.
All speculation but something was lost there...between apologizing and saying she has no heart.
Even if she has crazy wedding jitters...she needs to apologize out of sincerity NOT her checkbook otherwise its not a true apology. This will come up later if its not sincere the OP will feel it and the next time something comes up in the friendship this will all pour out or worse just resentment. I say don't go to the wedding its not like the bride was that torn that she wasn't attending. She used it against her to get what she wanted.
Also wondering if bridezilla had to apologize because Mommy was going to have to front the cost?

AI was too upset before to type out the whole story, but here it goes. Yes, yesterday bridezilla apologized and said she still really wanted the cake. Me being the heartless person I am felt bad and didn't want to screw them out of a wedding cake last minute, whether they deserved it or not I didn't want to be the one to ruin their day. Then bridezilla called me to inform me that groomzilla ordered a new cake, but it wasn't what she wanted. Trying to be the heartless b*tch that I am, I knew this was more about groomzilla's pride, so I offered to speak with him to try to mend the friendship between him and my hubby. Groomzilla said he would call me when he got home from work last night but never did. This morning I find out he didn't call because bridezilla's dog was dying. Fine, I completely understand that. This morning he tells my hubby he will speak to him after he goes to pay for the cake, hubby tells me to text bridezilla to make sure this is what she wanted, so I did ( after texting her that I was sorry about her dog). Her reply was that I have no heart and to leave her alone because her baby is dying (her dog). I cried all day, it's one thing to put a price tag on our friendship, but after everything I have done for her, irregardless of the cake, I don't think it was fair of her to say. Apparently she realized she was wrong, because she called me 2 hours ago sobbing about how sorry she is and wants to fix things, how she wants us at the wedding, but doesn't want a gift or the cake. I'm not sure what I will do now, definitely no cake, that's for sure. I told her I think we both need a few days to cool off, and she needs a few days to deal with things with her dog ( she's putting her down tomorrow). Sorry, I know this is a novel. My mom said its better than a soap opera.


Wow. This is why I don't watch soap operas. I can come to CC and get my fix for drama and at the same time get cake advice!
Pouchet82, I think she is the heartless b*tch for saying you don't care about her dog.
Anyway, good advice about taking a few days to cool off, for the both of you.
Good Luck!

ASounds like its all gotten a bit out of hand, best to just step away for now. Don't take her words to heart, you didn't do anything wrong and she knows it as much as you do.

AWow puochet that is better than a soap opera. I don't know how great your relationship was before all this but She is way immature. It's one thing to let emotions get crazy with Wedding and her dog but her statements were way out in left Field. I think you made a great decision and I'd just use the time To compare your life without this friend in it. I find drama loves drama. Meaning people like this find a way to make things Way more dramatic than they need to be. Good luck to you. (Hugs)

AIt seems that unless you're doing something for this couple (be it making a free cake or setting up doctor's appointments), they have no use for you. They seem so eager to exploit you. Think about it; after she apologized and said she wanted you and your husband at the wedding, everything was fine as long as you were doing the cake. As soon as she found out you weren't doing the cake (or so she thought) she turned on you AGAIN. As hurtful as it may seem, some folks are better off out of our lives than in.
For your own peace of mind though, I would suggest you forgive her and take a step back from the toxic relationship. Some people just need to be loved from a distance. You could attend the wedding (if hubby and you so please) as a sign that you've forgiven and moved on but forget the cake.

AI'm only just new to this forum, but I've been reading every post on this thread and it's really been a tragic drama. I'm so sorry this has been such a traumatic experience for you. X Anyway, the older (and wiser *wink*) I've become, I've come to realise that weddings really are a complete load of s**t. It's great business for you cake makers, I understand. But seriously, at the end of the day, it's ultimately about one committing themselves to another one. Now, I'm no math expert but I do know that one plus one equals two. Not 100+ guests and a $20k+ deficit. If a cake is the straw that broke the camels back, then I worry for the couple. If you can, smooth things over with them, you will feel better in your heart. Let them buy another cake. Go to their wedding. Have a great time. Make peace and move on. It is just a small moment in time and in a few months it will all be distant past. :) Stay strong.

A
Original message sent by vgcea
For your own peace of mind though, I would suggest you forgive her and take a step back from the toxic relationship. [B]Some people just need to be loved from a distance.[/B] You could attend the wedding (if hubby and you so please) as a sign that you've forgiven and moved on but forget the cake.

IMO, forgiveness will be the best thing for you and your husband. If you can see your way clear to attend the wedding, go and have a good time. Your friend seems to be under a lot of stress that she is not handling at all. Sometimes people lash out and say and do stupid things to those they know will still be there for them in the end. Kids to it all the time. Most often, the right thing to do is the hardest. I truly hope this works out for you.
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