Send Me Instructions @... Tell Me How You Did This!...

Decorating By sadsmile Updated 19 Feb 2010 , 12:33am by Deb_

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sadsmile Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 4:15pm
post #1 of 53

Usually I am a little tongue-in-cheek sarcastic or just teasing a friend and having a good time. I am not being back handedly sarcastic or trying to be itchy so read with a grain of salt my fellow cakers.

Often I see comments in the galleries that read simply: "Send instructions to [email protected]" or "Tell me how you made that and email me off this site at my personal email!" The poster is most likely not being demanding or pushy, but it kind of reads that way. Maybe in the excitement over the cake they forgot to comment about what they liked about the cake...?

I don't know about you guys but when I see a cake I love and am inspired to try a technique from I PM the caker (that's short for cake maker or artist extraordinaire- cause most of you are!) and attempt to introduce myself and compliment their work especially the details I am flipping over. I really try to examine the photos and figure out the details myself. I think it's fun to figure things out on my own. I will ask specifics for things I don't know and the almighty Google can't help me with like what specific cutter was used for that flower. (oh hey look my snarks back, maybe this won't be so bad after all
icon_wink.gif )

It just doesn't hit me right to see short comments that almost demand for instructions. I don't know who you are. Am I really going to type out a complete loooooong list of instructions for everything that went into a cake that took me 10 hours and a whole heck of a lot to figure out how to do in and make it work the first place? That's a lot of info!

Even to explain one part of something can take 500+ words to adequately describe. I may not mind sharing some but that's a lot of giving for not even a nice comment under my photo, when I don't know you from Adam. Oh and you say you are not a regular on this favorite community site of mine and you want me to send my instructions to your private email. icon_confused.gif Sure! No problem- it's right on the way, immediately!

Am I the only one who feels like that?

Some don't even like to share, and hey that's OK too. It's a trade thing ya know. So don't feel bad if you don't want to give away your road map to the hard work you just accomplished.

I am more then happy to answer questions (the limited amount I have received on the few cakes that others have liked) when a person PMs me and introduces them self and asks specifics or asks if they are on the right track to achieve a similar look.

Believe me I don't mind at all to see cakes similar to mine after all I got inspiration from somewhere too. It's really rather nice I am genuinely excited to check back with someone I have helped in my limited knowledge and see the cake they have made. That is pretty darn fun for me!

Cake is nothing but a bunch of layers right? There's the cake, filling, the icing or fondant, the shapes, and the colors and special details.

Try looking at it with imaginary x-ray eyes and see it from the ground up.

"Oh that board looks to be an inch thick with a ribbon around it and it's covered in fondant or paper, the cake is round and covered in green fondant and the next layer is a smaller square covered in pink oh it has a lovely pearl boarder... but what I don't know and can't figure out **after reading the caker's description** is that doohicky right there that is so pretty! I am going to have to ask about that part...

Sends a nice comment about the cake and then starts to type out a PM to ask about that special part that is hard to figure out....

See that really wasn't so hard. I guess all I am trying to say is... "You'll catch more flies with honey than you will with vinegar."

Am I right? thumbs_up.gif

52 replies
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dailey Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 4:33pm
post #2 of 53

well you are not alone in your frustrations! i don't mind sharing at all *but* 9 times out of 10, i DO NOT get a "thank you"!! i really *hate* that. mainly because i am not good at explaining and it always takes a good 5 minutes for me to type out the info...and then nothing. i hate to say this but there have been times where i've gotten PM's and i haven't answered them for this reason. of course, this is only if i don't recognize the name or they have zero post made. if its someone that i see on here often, i *will* always respond : ) ♥

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TexasSugar Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 4:34pm
post #3 of 53

I'm okay with the questions on how you did something specificly being posted, because it is great when the OP comes back and gives an quick answer so you have an idea, and it is there for others to see.

But when you have 5, 10, 20 or more people that just post their email and send me instructions, then that means the person posting it is going to spend alot of time (if they even do it) sending out emails to all those people, and in alot of cases not even getting a thank you in return.

I do see it differently if someone actually makes the effort to PM or email me and ask me a specific question on how I did something. That means that they probably really want the answer, rather than that was a cool idea, I'll file it for later and maybe use it some day.

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aej6 Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 4:39pm
post #4 of 53

"Often I see comments in the galleries that read simply: "Send instructions to [email protected]" or "Tell me how you made that and email me off this site at my personal email!"

I was JUST thinking about this the other day and how rude it comes across...meant that way or not, it sounds so entitled!!


"It just doesn't hit me right to see short comments that almost demand for instructions. I don't know who you are. Am I really going to type out a complete loooooong list of instructions for everything that went into a cake that took me 10 hours and a whole heck of a lot to figure out how to do in and make it work the first place? That's a lot of info! Even to explain one part of something can take 500+ words to adequately describe. I may not mind sharing some but that's a lot of giving for not even a nice comment under my photo, when I don't know you from Adam."

WELL SAID!!!

I often think just the same as what you have written when I see such comments! Now let me be clear that no one has ever asked me for anything (and I have very little to offer...hahaha!) but when I see those comments written by others I feel the same way as the OP.

To those who get such requests and respond with instructions, you are kind. To EVERYONE that responds to ANY request, written as mentioned above or in a kinder, gentler way....THANK YOU! The sharing on this board is amazing and is greatly appreciated; I couldn't even entertain the idea of trying these things without all the information on here that is offered and shared by posters.

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sadsmile Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 4:50pm
post #5 of 53

Too true... most of us are trolling the boards with helpful hints and answers to questions, ready to share. The encouragement in here blows me away!

I love this site mostly because of you... all the members are so terrific. This vent was just festering for a while. icon_rolleyes.gif

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thecakemaker Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 5:05pm
post #6 of 53

I'm with you on this one! I've done two tutorials and have answered endless PM's as to how to do something i've done. I love to share and and glad when i'm able to help someone with something they're having trouble with. Take a look at my first cowboy hat cake - I still get PM's and comments on this one on specific questions which is fine BUT the "e-mail me directions at __________ e-mail address and nothing more? - if they would read any of the comments they would see where I have replied multiple times that there is a tutorial and where to find it.

Don't get me wrong - there are a lot of people that have PM'd to thank me and even linked their creations so I could see them - which I love but I really don't care for the ones that seem like demands.

Debbie

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_Jamie_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 5:47pm
post #7 of 53

It's a matter of once one person posts "please send instructions to cantfindthegooglebuttonforsh*[email protected]"...it opens the floodgate. Like, oh cool! She's sending instructions! Me too! Me too!!

Lol.

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_Jamie_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 5:56pm
post #8 of 53

Right...a PM about a specific part is much more useful to everyone involved. I sent very detailed instructions the other day about something and have yet to hear if it worked or was it helpful or a gosh darned thank you period!

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foxymomma521 Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 6:08pm
post #9 of 53

Well said!

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sadsmile Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 6:08pm
post #10 of 53

Oh that's a good point Jamie. If someone has been kind enough to send you what you were asking for it's great to reply with a thank you. And when you are finished with your project it would be cool to let them know how it worked for you and if you posted your pics let them know so they can go check them out. thumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gif

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3GCakes Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 6:12pm
post #11 of 53

I very much agree---especially about the whole send me instructions as to how you created the universe. Especially with a private email address.

Here are some things I try to do, and I find helpful when people post pics/answer questions:

WHen a cake is described in the "cake description"....

ie: 10-8-6 inch layes, covered in fondant, Jem cutters, glued on with gum glue...etc.

I understand a lot of people don't have time to write really lengthy descriptions, but it would sure help to throw out a bone sometimes. There is such neat stuff being done.

I like when short answer questions are answered in the comments, such as:
"Hey I love your cake....which size cutter did you use?"

Cake maker: Thanks ! I used 6 mm.

So that what size cutter is not being sent to the cake maker 10 times via PM...it's right there for everyone to see.

And Thank-you's for the info .....should that even have to be said? icon_smile.gif

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FullHouse Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 6:26pm
post #12 of 53

Agreed. thumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gifthumbs_up.gif I've always been amazed at the "send instructions to xxx" and wondered anyone actually does, it does sound entitled. I'm sure some on here are just that kind and generous and will help no matter what. Me, not so much. Not that I have all that much to offer, but I am happy when I can help via forum posts or requests such as "Please can you share some tips regarding xxxx". Demands for help thumbsdown.gif .

While on this topic, a HUGE thank you to all of you who have shared invaluable information!!!!!

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FromScratch Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 6:30pm
post #13 of 53

You'd think it wouldn't (about the thank you's)... but it truly does.

I have no problem helping people either, but I don't like the "TELL ME HOW YOU DID THAT!!!" comments... especially if I spent hours trying to figure it out on my own.

Most people I have shared instructions with have been great though... PM-ing or emailing me when they made the cake to show me how it came out. I love seeing that! icon_smile.gif

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CakesByLJ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 8:21pm
post #14 of 53

All so true.. most requests I get I am very happy to accomodate, and I love helping when I can. But, if I fail to respond to a request... well, you can figure out why.. icon_smile.gif

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susanscakecreations Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 8:35pm
post #15 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by _Jamie_

It's a matter of once one person posts "please send instructions to cantfindthegooglebuttonforsh*[email protected]"...it opens the floodgate. Like, oh cool! She's sending instructions! Me too! Me too!!

Lol.




stop..........I'm going to have to go to the bathroom................I TOTALLY know how you feel!!!!!!

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sugarcheryl Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 8:38pm
post #16 of 53

Wow maybe I'm naive but I just can't believe people would do that. I would like to believe in there excitement and haste they do not realize how it comes across. Still sadsmile I'm glad you brought this to out we need to be considerate of other people time and respectful. Thanks thumbs_up.gif

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pattycakesnj Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 8:42pm
post #17 of 53

I agree with all your comments but I have sent a few pm's over the years asking for help, and nothing (except the other day about making a martini glass, Marilyn has been extremely helpful to me), not even, sorry it is a trade secret. I am always answering pm's for all kind of info. Yes it takes time but isn't that why we are here glued to our computers for hours on CC, to learn and teach others.

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Deb_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:06pm
post #18 of 53

Great idea Sadsmile to bring this to everyone's attention.

I have seen some of those comments too. Sometimes though I wonder if it's a cultural thing and English may not be the persons first language so it comes across a little rude.

I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif

CLEARLY English was not this persons first language. It made me laugh though.

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_Jamie_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:13pm
post #19 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by pattycakesnj

I agree with all your comments but I have sent a few pm's over the years asking for help, and nothing (except the other day about making a martini glass, Marilyn has been extremely helpful to me), not even, sorry it is a trade secret. I am always answering pm's for all kind of info. Yes it takes time but isn't that why we are here glued to our computers for hours on CC, to learn and teach others.




I answer them too, happily. Sarah's point is the broad sweeping "[email protected]" comments. Different situation. icon_smile.gif

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diane706 Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:18pm
post #20 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif




HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif

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Deb_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:22pm
post #21 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by diane706

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif



HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif




lol I know they lock the best threads lately!

When I received this PM my first thought was to respond with a simple "I WILL NOT"

But then I realized the person may not see the humor in that. icon_biggrin.gif

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_Jamie_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:23pm
post #22 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by diane706

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif



HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif




That's because someone with a fake user name came along and stirred the pot. icon_biggrin.gif

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Deb_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:25pm
post #23 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by _Jamie_

Quote:
Originally Posted by diane706

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif



HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif



That's because someone with a fake user name came along and stirred the pot. icon_biggrin.gif




I know I hate those wimps! Wondering if it's our long lost you know who? from 10C

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_Jamie_ Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:27pm
post #24 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_

Quote:
Originally Posted by _Jamie_

Quote:
Originally Posted by diane706

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif



HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif



That's because someone with a fake user name came along and stirred the pot. icon_biggrin.gif



I know I hate those wimps! Wondering if it's our long lost you know who? from 10C




detective.gif Could be!

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Spuddysmom Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:31pm
post #25 of 53

Good thread! Totally agree with OP - thanks for bringing this up. "Please" and "thank you" are so under-used these days!

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sadsmile Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:42pm
post #26 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by diane706

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif



HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif





ROFLMBO! I am going to have nightmares off star tipped monsters now.


Fall off your hand will. Guarantee I do.

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diane706 Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:47pm
post #27 of 53
Quote:
Originally Posted by sadsmile

Quote:
Originally Posted by diane706

Quote:
Originally Posted by Deb_


I once got a PM from a member that read something like "You will tell me how you made that castle cake" icon_eek.gificon_lol.gif



HeeHee! ....or else I will sic my star tip on you and you will be assimilated!! (A little reference to another thread a couple of you participated in). I'm kinda sad that thread ended. icon_lol.gif




ROFLMBO! I am going to have nightmares off star tipped monsters now.


Fall off your hand will. Guarantee I do.




LOL!! We totally hijacked your thread... sorry sad! I'm so glad you brought this subject up. It's so true.

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sadsmile Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 9:59pm
post #28 of 53

Diane you neva have 2 apologize for funny when I am around... A little humor injected goes a long way in my book! icon_wink.gif

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Sugarflowers Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 10:23pm
post #29 of 53

Thank you for posting this. There have been times that I have received requests for how to make the flowers in my avatar. I'm flattered that people are interested, but it's not an easy thing to describe. The thing took me 6 weeks to make!

It really annoys me when I get this request and I tell them that they can purchase the DVD with written instructions and I never hear from them again or get an order for it. The making of the DVD took a full 8 hours to tape, then it took the camera operator about 2 weeks to edit and put into proper DVD form. I typed the instructions to go with it that comes on a CD. I think that is at least 10 pages of instructions. It wasn't a cheap project either!

I will help with questions that are limited and nicely requested. Like most people here, I don't have all day to type instructions for something I made who knows how many years ago and made it up as I went along. Almost everything I do is made up as I go along.

Thanks again for posting this.

Michele

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bobwonderbuns Posted 16 Feb 2010 , 10:28pm
post #30 of 53

My issue is with people who ask then you never hear from them again -- like YOU'RE WELCOME!! icon_confused.gif (Ya couldn't even say thank you???) icon_confused.gif

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