I ran into an aquaintance today and he mentioned to me that he had been tasting my cakes lately. I responded with an "Oh?" So he tells me that he has been the guest at a number of homes lately who have had my cakes as the dessert. He then says he doesn't normally like cake. I asked him if my cakes had changed his mind, and he says, "No, not really." 
So, okay, I know, I know....I asked him if my cakes had changed his mind. But why even bring it up if you don't have anything nice to say??? 
Kathi
Well at least you know your cakes are out and about. I guess you could just look at it that way. 
Well he did say, that he "normally" doesn't like cake, but if he ate yours and remembered, themn he must've liked them, otherwise he would've declined the second cake. Some people just cannot admit to liking something or cannot give a compliment. Either he is a glutton for punishment for having eaten something he normally avoids or he has difficulty admitting to actually having found cake he likes
ok...
that's NOT a dis!
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just why do women think they have some kind of magic wand that will change us men into their perfect ideal of what a man should be????
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he doesn't like cake.
but ---
he was nice enough to mention he'd seen them and even tried them -- He acknowledge your work. He didn't do the typical man thing of not seeing it or noticing it.
so, he still doesn't like cake.
at least he didn't say they made him hate cake more!
----
I was thinking the same thing Doug ~ at least he doesn't hate cake even more, lol!
Doug I think she was just wondering why he even bothered to bring it up if he wasnt going to say anything good about it. Its like when my father would say to my mom "Oh you got your hair cut." THen he wouldnt say anything else which led her to believe he didnt like it. If he liked it he should say "Oh I noticed you got your hair cut. It looks nice." If he didnt like it, then he shouldnt bring it up!!
I think most woman just want to understand why a man thinks the way they do. Probably, viseversa!
Okay Doug I'm sorry! It wasn't meant as a comment against men. I just didn't understand why he would say anything at all, if he didn't like them. I didn't even think of the possibility that he was trying to acknowledge my work.
Obviously, I stepped on some toes without meaning to. I'll go back into lurker mode now!
Kathi
Doug's comment reminds me of how my dad responds to things ... 'yeah, sure I ate it but it does't mean I want it every day!'
In fact, while I was reading your post I was thinking "that is so my dad!" Honestly, I think he was complimenting you -- in a "guy sort of way".
My dad's birthday is on Wednesday ... he loves my cakes, thinks they are the best cakes around, BUT he doesn't want a cake for his birthday. A year or so ago I would have thought that was an insult. Now, I just realize he's being honest -- He loves my cake but he want one.
Doug's a man ... and I think Doug's right.
kathik,
take it for what it was, a "guy" compliment. If they don't like something it don't exist. If they do like something then they mention it. That's bout all you can hope for I reckon. LMBO!!!!!! I think it's just a guy thing. No offense Doug it's just that guys think different than women do. Which is ok. We don't need the whole human race bein PMS (potential murder suspects). 
Doug I think she was just wondering why he even bothered to bring it up if he wasnt going to say anything good about it. Its like when my father would say to my mom "Oh you got your hair cut." THen he wouldnt say anything else which led her to believe he didnt like it. If he liked it he should say "Oh I noticed you got your hair cut. It looks nice." If he didnt like it, then he shouldnt bring it up!!
I think most woman just want to understand why a man thinks the way they do. Probably, viseversa!
Okay Doug I'm sorry! It wasn't meant as a comment against men. I just didn't understand why he would say anything at all, if he didn't like them. I didn't even think of the possibility that he was trying to acknowledge my work.
Obviously, I stepped on some toes without meaning to. I'll go back into lurker mode now!
Kathi
It's a GUY thing -- hey we noticed -- that's enough as far as we're concerned. more than that, probably ain't going to happen!
just the fact that we even took the time to notice is our version of a compliment! (lame as it might be considered by the fairer, less Neanderthal gender)
(and if I might rant a bit -- in this day and age, lots of men AFRAID to saying ANYTHING -- for fear of "sexual harassment accusations" and just having learned, silence is often the better choice. No matter what we say, we're wrong it seems.)
and no need for anyone and especially you Kathi to lurk..
I've just got to defend my gender!!!
It's one against --- let's see -- oh, about 100,000* women on here!
(oh my gosh -- 100,047 registered members! -- and hey -- WHERE's DALE!?! and the other guys! -- what, have they abandoned me and CC?)
I ran into an aquaintance today and he mentioned to me that he had been tasting my cakes lately. I responded with an "Oh?" So he tells me that he has been the guest at a number of homes lately who have had my cakes as the dessert. He then says he doesn't normally like cake. I asked him if my cakes had changed his mind, and he says, "No, not really."
So, okay, I know, I know....I asked him if my cakes had changed his mind. But why even bring it up if you don't have anything nice to say??? Kathi
Kathi, unlike all the other comments I've read here, I have a different take on this conversation, and it goes something like this:
[Fred is standing in the aisle at his local grocer. He spots Kathi and thinks, oh, rats! I've got to say something nice to her about her cakes.] "Hi, Kathi. You know, I've been at a number of homes lately where your cakes have been served as dessert. [whew; that wasn't that hard.] You know, I don't usually like cake." [okay, that wasn't so difficult, either.]
{Kathi responds:} "Hi, Fred. So good to see you here. So, did you like my cakes? Have my cakes made you change your mind?"
"No, not really." [not as a rule, but, man, were your cakes yummy. I usually wouldn't take cake, but after that first one, well ... every time one of your cakes has been offered, I am finding they are all pretty tasty.]
So, why can't men just say things like that instead of stopping short? I would like to be able to give this guy a break and believe that he simply stopped himself from telling you ALL the truth here: that he likes YOUR cakes, but as a rule doesn't really care for cake that much.
And, even if he's not a total convert, the fact that he's noticing you are getting lots of orders from your friends is really something in and of itself (at least he's noticing something!).
Hang in there, it's all good!
Odessa
I think I see where that guy's coming from and at the same time I can empathaize with how you feel. I do think it's a way of saying "Hey I tried your cakes! Even though I don't lilke cakes I tried yours just because they're yours. I still don't like cake but I think yours were pretty ok."
What you seem to have heard was "I tried your cake and didn't like them"
Mars and Venus in action!
If I had a penny everytime one of the men in my life throws a Martian comment, I'd...have enough money to buy a KopyKake projector.
Just my 2cents
Don't be offended. My husband, who is very attentive and generally dotes on me, is the same way. He just had his first grandchild in February. My husband has never really been one to like babies. He thinks they are boring...so we get home from Father's Day brunch and I asked what he thought of his grandson. He said" He's a good baby...but he's just not that interesting, maybe later when he can go to a football game or something it'll be more fun to play with him." and that is his grandchild!!!!!!!!!
At least he said it to me and not his daughter.
lol sounds like my dh everytime I bake him something I have to actually ask "so how were the brownies.cookies,cake whatever" and he says " oh they were good hun thank you" lol he works with all men and when he brings some baked goods to work I still have to ask "so how do the guys like ...... " and he says oh they loved them can you make such and such tomorrow" lol typical male answers dont be offended most of us women have come to expect the non commital responses, I think men consider them answers of self preservation for fear of saying the wrong thing.
Manswers! I love that!
Self preservation - yes! That's what it is!
Ya learn somethin new everyday on CC and it's not just about cakes 
Ok, ladies, I hate to "switch over to the enemy" but I have to be on Doug's side on this one. It's just a guy thing.
THere was an episode of Roseanne where Fred showed Dan the ring he bought for Jackie. Roseanne finds out he saw it and starts asking all kinds of detailed questions about it. Dan's answer to every single one was "I don't know." He saw the ring..... details are not important.
So, the guy not only saw your cakes, but he ate them repeatedly. A self professed "not a cake lover" ate them over and over. I'd say that's a great compliment.
My husband has a VERY irritating habit of tasting new dishes, new cakes, icings, cookies and proclaiming them 'Not bad". I finally told him how irritating that was because when he proclaims them "not bad", then it sounds like he was EXPECTING it to be bad and since it's not, then he is proclaiming that it's NOT bad! It's like he's reversing the insult before he states the insult!
Of course he thinks I'm nut. He said, "Look, I COULD say 'It's not horrible!' Would that be better?"
We just chalk it up to Mars and Venus!
It's now a joke between us. His highest compliment is "It's not horrible"
I agree that there is definitly a difference in the communication styles between men and women.....given the fact that he seems to have approached her with the "I tasted your cake" thing even tho he doesnt like cake. (definitly a compliment), is it really off base to suppose that there might be an attraction of some sort and he used that as a conversation starter. Like "Hey...I like you and I want to talk to you, I know you like to make cakes so I'll start with that.?
I guess I will take this as a male compliment. My husband reminded me this man is not very socially adept, so perhaps that plays into it as well. I really hope that he doesn't "like" me, since me davens (prays) every morning with my husband and 15 year old son. 
I guess I've been a little extra sensitive lately and took his comment negatively. I need to try to work on this.
Kathi
I totally understand that this is like a a german speaking french to a scottish man.
Men say logical things that usually are stated facts. We read into this emotion and feeling when none was intended.
So thank him and know some man who doesn't "like" cake has repeatedly eaten yours and took the time to mention it to you.
So he liked it some what or he he wouldn't have eaten it, men don't usually eat something they don't like. Especially more than once! 
I love Odessa's take on his answer!! LOL
Manswers is also good. I have a friend who was recently married. She gives her new hubby "stupid tokens" for his really off the wall comments or answers to questions. She buys a new dress (she HATES shopping and goes to 15 different stores and FINALLY finds one she thinks looks nice). She comes home and he says, "I guess I need to get something else now so I won't look overdressed." 
I'm sure you know how that one ended...stupid token paid.
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