i am in culinary school to be a pastry chef i work at a hospital and everyone knows i am in culinary school. so this one lady who working in my department was all i want to do cakes but i dont bake how hard can it be. so i let it roll of my back whatever. then i show her my cakes now they are not great but are getting better i have only been doing cakes for a year and 1/2 so i was showing her my progress. she laughed at all of my cakes to my face no the less saying she was going to hire me to do her dd birthday cake but once she got a load of my cakes she KNOWS she is a better cake decorator. now slapping some icing on cup cakes is the extent of her decorating skills. i was just deeply hurt by this.
i am always more then happy to give tips on stuff but am i wrong not to help her?? she informed me that she bought a 20' industry pan to make her dd cake and she is expecting 50 (she will be swing in cake) not to mention its not going to fit in her oven nor will it bake correctly with out heat cours??? its a surf them so she envisioned a wave coming up out of the cake and all this stuff that cant be done if you have never picked up a piping bag should i just tell her to buy a cake?? she also informed me she has a wedding cake order for june THIS YEAR i dont think she relizes time, and skill that goes into them.
so all in all how do you deal with people like this??????
Anyone who has the audacity to say she can do it better (and probably believes it too) than you and hasn't asked for your advice, probably needs the opportunity to learn the hard way. Some people can only learn that way anyway.
P.S. I saw your cakes and they are great!
I agree! People don't realize how time consuming cakes can be. Let her see how good of a decorator she really is. If the cake she makes stinks, you will probably never see a picture of it!
Don't let her get you down on your cake skills! Everybody starts somewhere, and taking classes will help you get the basics down.
She doesn't need any tips, she knows it all. Let her fall on her face.
Bless you heart. It sounds like this lady is jealous of your skills. I personally wouldn't want to help her, but I might "warn" her that she needs more skills, time to do the cakes she has decided to do. Next time she is rude to your face. Ask her if her mom taught her what rude was? I ave trouble keeping my pie hole closed around rude people. I always question their manners to their face. Good luck in school. Just remember that when your done, you'll blow her away.
I would agree. Your cakes are great. It sounds like she is only going to learn this lesson the hard way. The nerve of her! Why should she benefit from all your hard work and knowledge for nothing?
Well first of all... your cakes are great!! Period. I would tell her that i cant wait to see her cake and then i would start bugging her about a picture about a week after the party! I wouldnt help her personally, if someone was that rude to me i wouldnt offer up any helpfull tips, i wouldnt even tell her that the 20 inch pan isnt going to work!!!!!! And when she fails, i would laugh at her and make it known that if she had hired you she wouldnt have ruined her dd's birthday! (hopefully at this point she will tell you that you hurt her feeling and i would ask her how she thinks you felt when she laughed at you!)
this must be why my DH tells me i can be a witch with a capitol B 
Let her learn the hard way that this is not easy. I had someone do the same to me. She made the cake for I party I would also be attending, she said "it can't be that hard to put together a cake" Well she gets to the party and it was ugly, she didn't even level the cakes. All of my friends were waiting to try it, because she kept saying how good her cakes were. The cake was horrible! All of the plates had at least half of the piece left on them. No one finished a whole piece. Then she asked me to teach her to decorate and bake cakes, I was to busy for her! I love helping people, but she was putting down my cakes that I work very hard on. Don't feel bad, you are not wrong!
Erica
I have a name I use for people like that. I'm probably not allowed to repeat it here 
All I can say is, when she embarks on her cake decorating debut sit back and enjoy the show!
Ignore her. She sounds like a rude and tactless mare not deserving of any help from you.
Oh, please do not help her.
I can't wait to hear about the results of this one! A 20" pan, huh?
When she comes to you and says it does not fit in her oven, tell her to get some legs and a screen, and use it as a barbecue grill.
And when she asks for help, tell her what I was once told by a very rude chef, "Sorry, trade secret."
Theresa 
so all in all how do you deal with people like this??????
...you handle it with respect, dignity and class. IMO, (I'll prepare to get flamed) there is no need to be vindictive. It's a tough world out there. Rude people are around every corner...but it doesn't mean that rudeness should be returned. Everyone has their own story...you never know what happens behind closed doors. There could be a variety of reasons why she acts in a rude manner. I'm not saying you need to be her best friend or her sous chef, but maybe an occasional positive, encouraging response to her questions will make you feel good about YOURSELF. It sounds like her self esteem is lacking. 
From what you've said, she already is heading down the wrong road w/ her cake. You can have confidence that you are a better decorator (pix are nice, by the way). But, the ultimate person to get feelings hurt is her child who will have a yucky cake. So, IMHO, help a sister out. You may be surprised to find she will show kindness and gratitude in return. You can always use humor in your response to her..."I'll help if you stop busting my stones about how you are a better decorator (while winking and smiling). I'll step off of my soapbox now and continue perusing the posts so I can vicariously live through Dear Abby... Take the high road...with this approach you never can go wrong...you will always feel good about yourself.
The nerve!! I wouldn't give her the time of day!! You should also let her know how ugly she is!! I do believe she's fixin' to learn a huge lesson!! Sit back, relax, & enjoy the show! She deserves to learn the hard way... oh... I hope you didn't tell her about CC... 
Don't take it personnally. Some people just don't know how to be nice. I don't think I would be rude to her, whats the saying "kill her with kindness". As far as helping her, I personnally wouldn't and if she wants to know why just explain it to her. Your cakes are good and I am sure in a few years we will probably see you on the food network cake challenges, so keep up the great work.
I do agree with cupcakemom on this point. Sounds like she is lacking is self-esteem. Therefore, you would be wasting your energy to dwell on this. YOUR cakes are lovely and YOU are going to be a Pastry Chef one day.
However, I don't think you need to help her for these reasons. One: She won't listen because she THINKS she is a better decorator than you. Two: It may be necessary for her to RECOGNIZE what her skills (or lack there of ) really ARE!
We have a lady at our church who used to work at Kroger and did some cakes. She really thought her cakes were great! But, when the wedding pics developed...the cake was leaning and she didn't put the flowers on them like the bride wanted. She only did 2 wedding cakes. One for her nephew's wedding (family, gift, etc.) and one for another girl in our church. They didn't say a word out of respect (they are really good kids) but, I felt sorry for them.
Neither she or her sisters EVER compliment anyone because "we wouldn't do it that way". They are now elderly but were like that when they were young too. Know how I KNEW I had arrived? When someone told me how they RAVED about MY cakes! TA DA!! I can die a HAPPY WOMAN! LOL
Remember: Take the high road!
Beth in KY
Agreeing with thecupcakemom and berthola. I've learned that giving respect even in the face of disrespect, eventually shifts others, but more importantly, makes me feel good about me... we are each the author of our own lives and as such, our own authority in the end.
Happy decorating!
In my experiance with people like this (and believe me I've had my share) the thing to do is Not let her know her words affected you. In the long run that will get to her more than anything. She wanted to get a response from you. That's what rude people live for. As for helping her...I would not. Let her figure it out on her own since she thinks it's so easy. Of course you can still send daggers with your eyes when she's not looking! Send some for all of us too!!LOL
I would probably say "can't wait to see your pictures, that's gonna be one BIG cake! - hope the pan fits in your oven" and let her figure out the rest.
Then if she fails, it's not because you didn't warn her. You don't owe it to her, but it's the decent thing to do.
Also, I wouldn't ever talk "cakes" with her again or show her any more of your pictures. She obviously has issues and you don't need to be at the receiving end of her ignorance.
Good luck with cullinary school!
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