I live in Mass. I think most people give $100 for a wedding gift ... at least that's what I do. You rarely see wrapped gifts at weddings in my area. Also, if you don't attend the wedding; but want to send a gift, what would you send? I take into consideration that they're not spending money on your meal.

To me, it depends on my relation to the couple. If it's a dear friend, I'm going to dig deep. If it a relation, I'm going to dig a wee bit deeper. If it's an aquaintance, I'll frame the wedding invitation with really nice matting so that it can hang on the wall and call it a day. $100 sounds a bit indulgent if I'm not close to the couple. I'll also go to the nearest closeout store and buy a quality piece of crystal for $50 or so. The only problem with that is if I'm not attend the wedding, shipping on leaded crystal is a beast.

Massachusetts is a high-econonmy state; that's why I'm asking. I wrote to a friend in South Dakota once and told her about my niece's wedding and said I gave her $150. She just about hit the roof. She told me they give about $25! I think that sounds too low ... for a couple who is attending a wedding and having a meal there. I think your gift should at the very least cover the cost of the two meals you're consuming at the wedding!

I actually am sending a gift of money to my cousin in Boston. I was thinking $200.00.

We are Chinese so it is always money! Also the etiquette is to give back how much she she would spend on your family. That would be through the roof!

I generally try to go by the thought that I want to at least cover the cost of our meal. I think $100 is average if it is myself and dh attending.

I am in MASS also. I give $125-$150 as a gift if both DH and I are attending. It depends on how close I am with the couple or if I'm related to them.

If we can't go to the wedding then I usually try to order something off of their wedding registry and have it shipped to their home. I don't spend as much in this case because we aren't attending the wedding and the bride and groom is not paying for our meal.

hmm...I feel cheap here..I go to Tuesday Mornings sometimes and get gifts. I spend around 50.00 if they are friends. I also like to give monetary gifts because it can help them with costs and what not.

Christi

OMG way down south here in GA you only get $100 from parents or grandparents.
I usually spend about $30 and buy something off a registry. That is a norm around here.

Also we don't usually do sit down dinners here. We have light hours- devors (sp?) and dancing or just a simple church reception.

I'm in NY...and I'm Greek...

Greeks here ONLY give money.....anywhere from $100-200 per person....depending on how close you are...


You won't find a decent catering hall here anymore for less than that per plate. I know you should give what you want to and not based on how much the wedding costs, but that's what I've always done.
And, to boot....I have a HUGE family.....we have weddings and Christenings (same cost) all the time....but my husband says it's all BORROWED money! You give it and then you get it back!

Lately, even the sweet 16's are getting to be a huge deal!

$100 or more would be what we would do.

Dang I feel really cheap. Usually I spend $25-30 depending on the person. I may spend more for someone I'm really close to. Usually I just pick some small stuff off of their gift registry and make them some sort of a gift basket. It looks like I spent all kinds of money when I really didn't.

Here, the you do good to get cake, punch, and maybe a few appetizers at a wedding. The normal gift is anywhere from 25-50. Family is slightly more, sometimes. Gifts for this area are useful; plastic bowls, pots and pans, towels. Registry is usually Wal-Mart, Target, and maybe a small local shop with pretty's.

I've been a bridesmaid at every wedding I've been to besides my cousin's wedding and she told all invites not to give a gift. I always have given my friends something around $50 as a gift. I would think that it's a huge favor for me to be the maid of honor for them...especially the last one I was in and she had a huge bridal shower. I made the cake for that (butterfly one in my photos) and the other bridesmaids and I made a really nice meal for it as well. We had to rent a hall because there were so many people coming (luckily her parents paid for the hall).

Also, don't forget that you give a gift at the shower as well.

Anyway...I don't think that around $50 for a present would be too cheap anyway.

I wish everyone had given us money for the wedding present...that would at least help pay for the wedding lol

We usually choose something from the wedding registry for under $100. If it is a family member, we will give cash of between $150 - $200.

On another note, we are Chinese too and when we got married in Dec 87, all our friends and family knew that we would be migrating to Australia in March 88 so they did not buy us any gifts. Everyone gave us money and we very generous. We actually got much more that we spent on the wedding and reception!! It pays to migrate after you get married!!

Um...should I get divorced then remarry my DH so you can send me a gift Barbara??? LOL

I'm from Queens, NY, and the last wedding I attended we gave $150, and that was just a co-worker of my DH's. Years prior, a good friend of mine got married and we gave her $400. I know, nuts, but she's also my DS's Godmother. In all honesty I think we tend to overgive, but you supposedly give what you'd expect back, I'll see if thats true when my wedding comes!

I've also attended Bridal showers and still given a gift at the wedding.

For those who posted that you do give physical gifts at the wedding....just curious...
Are bridal showers customary where you live? If so, do you give household gifts twice?

What we do is have the Bridal shower....give a household gift (lately, gift cards are actually welcomed)...and then give cash at the wedding...

I typically give something personal at the shower (lingerie, monogrammed towels, etc). If I give a physical gift at the wedding, it's typically off of the registry or a piece of leaded crystal. All of this just depends on how well I know the recipient. There's too much going on this time of year with high school and college graduations, weddings, babies, etc for me to fret too much. I have X amount of expendible budget. If you're fortunate enough to have planned your event when no one else has an event, you're more likely to score a better gift.

Around here you give a gift only once, if you make it to the shower that's all they get! The only gifts at the wedding are those that didn't make it to the shower. I knew I wanted to get married somewhere else!

If I give a gift instead of cash it will be something off of their registry.

I live in Ontario Canada, so take my response for what it's worth, but my husband and I usually give $200 for the two of us. If we take our DD, we add an extra $30 or so. Most of our weddings that we go to are for Italian couples if that makes a difference. We also look at what we received from that couple/person and go from there (that's what my MIL told me to do)...

Jen

In rural Illinois it is norm to give $30 to $50, dpending on your relationship. However, if you are from the city, you are probably going to give $100 to $200 on the average wedding. When I got one of those checks from a friend of my dad, I was in shock.

I wish I could afford to give that to each wedding we go to but I have to go by what I can afford. I can not see putting myself in more debt to give a gift. When I go to a shower I like to give a big basket of Christmas items. Most young couples don't have any christmas things and I love to shop for new christmas items. I buy lights and ornaments. Cookie cutters and potholders. Usually a ahnd towel and a kitchen towel too. I try to include both fragile and nonbreakable ornaments! Everyone has loved this. I always try to buy things to restock my supply after Christmas each year. For the wedding I will get a big Pampered chef stone and Pizza cutter.