What Is A Typical Wedding Gift In Your State?
Lounge By LittleLinda Updated 22 Apr 2007 , 2:27am by LittleLinda
Here in the Pittsburgh metro, standard wedding gift is between 50-100 dollars. Its very rare that you even see people bring real gifts to a wedding anymore. I recently went to a friends wedding, had champagne flutes from Disney World engraved (personalized), bought a bottle of champagne, added a candle arrangement, and a few 1st christmas together christmas ornaments, arrived and was surprised that my gift was one of 5 total!!!! Several recent weddings were the same. As for the bridal shower, people almost always buy something off the registry.
Now that I'm getting married this year, and with all the bills, I hope that people give money to pay for some of it!! My fiance asked if we can just register for money. LOL I told him you can't ask people not to bring presents! Men.....sigh.....LOL
I'm in southern MI, bad economy here so everyone is tight on the purse strings. I give anywhere from $25--$100 depending on who the person is. Family and friends always get more---aquaintances or friends I'm not really close to get the smaller amounts. I gave my brother $100 for his wedding gift, but I also was in the wedding and made the dessert table items (which cost me close to $300) Also gave the bridal shower and gave a present worth $100 then. Yikes!!! Now that I think about it, I spent a lot on them. But I love them and they are worth it. Most people here give $25 - $50. The people who can give more generally do.
Wow I have been googling for answers to this question! I was wondering if cash would be appropriate. I am from Queens NY originally and from a hispanic family. BUT I married into an Irish family and was wondering if cash would be considered an insult.
Usually in my hispanic family we gift $200 for a friend or regular family member. For the very close and special family members it would be anywhere from $300 - $500. For instance $500 for an upcoming cousin who is my daughter's God mother and my daughter is in the bridal party. Siblings get more than that! I have two brother's in law and one sister and thankfully so far not one of them looks likely to settle down anytime soon!
HOWEVER, now that we live in a small town we wouldn't gift more than $100. ONLY Special military friends would get the $200.
tiersfromheaven (love that catch phrase!) Lucky you found this thread, it probably saved you some money now that you moved!
Bridal registry suggestion for you brides-to-be: My sister-in-law did a stupid thing ... she had just about every kind of glass she liked in her registry ... she ended up with a shower FULL of different glassware! I think every thrid gift was a set of glasses! It was lousy for her! Pick a pattern and stick with it on anything you don't need two or more of.
Another thing she said was that she was afraid to put anything expensive in her registry because she thought it made her look greedy. So, she got a bunch of inexpensive things for the shower too. Don't forget that many people like to pitch in and get big-ticket items.
We usually give between 25-50$ in cash to weddings we attend ... of course the family members that we are very close to we usually end up giving in different ways such as throwing the showers, buying the food etc ... but I am pretty sure, at least with my husband and me, after you are married and doing the house thing with the everyday life activities we wouldn't be able to remember who gave us 5$ or 500$!!
I'm in NY too....and 100 bucks is about right if you're giving cash. But there's nothing wrong with getting things off the registry.
Also....I love getting the bride and groom a set of one of a kind, handmade wine glasses (IF I really like them!)
As for gifts being cheaper in the south.....it is ONLY because receptions are no where near as elaborate as they are in the northeast (from my own experience living in both areas). The receptions in the south (that I have been to) rarely include dinner or dancing. It's usually just dessert and coffee. So 25-30 bucks is fitting.
About $50 in gift or cash is normal around here. I actually was invited to a wedding where the very specifically stated that gifts were not welcome and you were expected to send CASH because they wanted a big screen TV in return for all the money they were spending on the reception! 
I sent a gift 
(did not like the people in question but was rather obligated to attend).
I prefer offering to make the wedding cake for close friends, than choosing and wrapping a gift.
the very specifically stated that gifts were not welcome and you were expected to send CASH because they wanted a big screen TV in return for all the money they were spending on the reception!
That sounds ignorant to me!
the very specifically stated that gifts were not welcome and you were expected to send CASH because they wanted a big screen TV in return for all the money they were spending on the reception!
That sounds ignorant to me!
Sounds ignorant??? How 'bout COMPLETELY RUDE and void of ANY sort of character!
the very specifically stated that gifts were not welcome and you were expected to send CASH because they wanted a big screen TV in return for all the money they were spending on the reception!
That sounds ignorant to me!
Sounds ignorant??? How 'bout COMPLETELY RUDE and void of ANY sort of character!
rlsaxe: Don't sugar-coat it now, say what you feel! LOL!
I think the reason that a lot of weddings have less and less actual gifts on the table is because it is good manners to have a wedding gift delivered to the bride or bride's parents home before the wedding takes place. Its also very proper to give the groom cash at the wedding . . . although money dances are technically a no-no. (Even though they are popular I cringe at them . . . I'm such a 90 year old trapped in a 30 year old body.) Bridal showers are appropraite places to give household gifts unless the shower is a special theme, such as lingerie, outdoors, etc.
I am giving a bridal tea this Sunday and I have completely lost my patience with peoples complete lack of manners! The invites were handmade by me and took almost an hour for each one . . . they clearly stated at the bottom "Kindly respond by April 15th." The only people who RSVP'd were family . . . all of the friends had to be called and asked. I actually had to tell someone who had bought new jeans and a tank top for the party that I would appreciate it if she came dressed a bit more appropriate for a spring tea-time shower. I also had to tell someone they couldn't bring a gift basket of items from an adult store--the bride is not that kind of girl, she would be horribly embarassed, and its a bridal TEA for goodness sakes! Its not like I booked the Chippendale dancers! Argh. I just got done telling my mom that from now on . . . birthdays, engagements, holidays, etc . . . the only gift I am giving will be a copy of the Emily Post Guide to Manners.
Argh. Don't get me started on Thank You Notes! 
ohhhhh thank you notes! The women at my church gave me a baby shower for my when my son was born last September (second child). Before I opened the first gift, they had all agreed ahead of time (all 36 of them) that their first gift to me would be that they did NOT want me to write out thank you cards for them. It was a nice gesture on their part, trying to help me out with time issues. But there was no way I could do that! I was raised to send thank you cards when someone gives me a gift!
Two weeks later, so many of them would see me in church and reprimand me for sending out the thank you's anyway.
It's all how you're brought up. Manners is a dying art.
I know I'm probably backwards in thinking this, but I will spend much more on a gift if I'm not attending a wedding than if I am. The way I see it, if I don't go I'm saving money and can therefore spend more on a gift. I don't think how much money is spent on my dinner should be any consideration what-so-ever. And it shouldn't be expected if you throw a fancy reception to recieve more in gifts. You invite people because you want them to be with you and you give gifts because you want to. It just bugs me what people "expect" these days. That being said, for family and friends I'd spend $25-$50 if I go to the wedding and $100 or more if I'm not. Someone who's closer to me I'd spend more.
It is improper etiquette to assume that your guests should giev you a gift that is at the same value that your reception dinner costs.
HERE HERE!!!!!
It may be an unspoken rule in some circles, and certainly you want to spoil your closest friends and family . . . but its not my fault that a bride chose to throw a reception that costs almost $200 per plate!!! When you factor in the expenses to the guests--clothing, hotel, gas, gift, etc . . . just to attend a wedding is expensive. Now add in the cost of being an attendant--throwing the shower, having a bachelorette party, bridal luncheon, wedding gift, shower gift, paying for the dress, hair, shoes, etc . . . its mind boggling!!!
I'm happy for people when they get married, but I 100% disagree with spending so much money on a wedding and expecting too much of the people around you. I remember hearing one time that people spend more time and money planning the wedding than they do planning for their marriage and future. What a bummer . . .
[quote="KatieTaylor77 Now add in the cost of being an attendant--throwing the shower, having a bachelorette party, bridal luncheon, wedding gift, shower gift, paying for the dress, hair, shoes, etc . . . its mind boggling!!![/quote]
Asking somebody to be a bridesmaid should be taken seriously. Very close friends and very close family members. It is very expensive to be a bridesmaid.
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