I Noticed Something In The Gallery
Decorating By Jadensmom Updated 5 Mar 2007 , 2:12pm by karennayak
Come on, people, do you post pics because you're proud of them or because you are fishing for compliments or displays of gratitude? The thought that before someone adds a pic to their favorites gallery, they must thank the poster, is a little childish, no?
Sometimes I answer questions and sometimes I don't. If someone has asked for a tutorial on how to do something and I don't have time to write a lengthy dissertation on the subject, I ignore it. Call it rude or call it effective time management, whatever. I share when I have time.
The fact that people get their feelings hurt when people don't lavish praise on their work has always seemed to me to be quite...oh, I don't know...narcissistic?
The one thing that does kind of bother me a teeny bit is when someone PM's me for information, I supply it, and then never hear anything back. Posting pics or templates to the gallery - I don't expect anything because I know it's a public gallery. No -- big -- deal. 
I work in a grocery bakery and I always do my best on each cake I decorate. Then the cake goes into the cooler to await pickup. There has never been a cake picked up while I was working...the gals working the evening shift usually are the ones to give the cake to the customer and many times, when the cake turns out really pretty or well-done, I wonder what the customer's reaction was..was she pleased...did she comment on how pretty the cake was...but you never hear anything from the other shift..and it just seems like begging for compliments to ask, well, what did the customer say?? Was she happy?? So you have to get to the point that you yourself take pride in turning out a great product. JMO
Welcome to CC!!!!
Here's a topic that I have spoken of in the past because I received a pm about it that felt like a backhanded slap in the face.
I usually post a photo in the gallery, and then start a thread about it. In the threads, people comment...people ask questions....I don't think there has ever been a thread that I did not respond to...or that I did not thank everyone. It's really nice to get commetns on your work..especially if you're just starting out.
I get notified when someone leaves a comment, but when it is a question about the cake, I usually pm the person BECAUSE....as stated previously...the commentors do NOT get notified if I answer the question in the comments section....therefore it might seem as if the question went unanswered. I encourage people to PM me with questions just in case I miss it in the comments section. Furthermore..(at the risk of sounding conceited)....I cannot tell you how many questions I get on my cakes on a daily basis. At busy times, I have left some pm's sitting in my In Box for WEEKS....BUT I have never let one go unanswered...and I always apologize for the delay. So , if someone thinks I have ever been ungrateful....I think you shouldn't judge until you have been in my shoes.
I usually post my answers under my photo instead of PMing it...one reason is because I assume the person will come back and check unless they leave their email address for me....secondly, because I figure maybe somebody else will have the same question, and maybe others will appreciate reading the public answer....also that way I only have to answer it once time. 
Come on, people, do you post pics because you're proud of them or because you are fishing for compliments or displays of gratitude? The thought that before someone adds a pic to their favorites gallery, they must thank the poster, is a little childish, no?
Sometimes I answer questions and sometimes I don't. If someone has asked for a tutorial on how to do something and I don't have time to write a lengthy dissertation on the subject, I ignore it. Call it rude or call it effective time management, whatever. I share when I have time.
The fact that people get their feelings hurt when people don't lavish praise on their work has always seemed to me to be quite...oh, I don't know...narcissistic?
The one thing that does kind of bother me a teeny bit is when someone PM's me for information, I supply it, and then never hear anything back. Posting pics or templates to the gallery - I don't expect anything because I know it's a public gallery. No -- big -- deal.
I'm not trying to be snippity here....but I just noticed that you are saying you will not write someone if you do not have time...yet if someone does not reply to your PM, you think its rude? Maybe they are just as busy as you are?
Personally I'm with adven...I might not have time to write immediately...but I will keep the notification in my inbox to remind me to write until I have time. Usually I get it done within three days or so. I don't get as many questions as adven, LOL, but when I do, I try my best to answer (even though sometimes I'm not much help) because I am self taught and had alot of questions, and its how I learned. And I still have questions, and am thankful for those who take the time to help me grow in this art!
Come on, people, do you post pics because you're proud of them or because you are fishing for compliments or displays of gratitude? The thought that before someone adds a pic to their favorites gallery, they must thank the poster, is a little childish, no?
Sometimes I answer questions and sometimes I don't. If someone has asked for a tutorial on how to do something and I don't have time to write a lengthy dissertation on the subject, I ignore it. Call it rude or call it effective time management, whatever. I share when I have time.
The fact that people get their feelings hurt when people don't lavish praise on their work has always seemed to me to be quite...oh, I don't know...narcissistic?
The one thing that does kind of bother me a teeny bit is when someone PM's me for information, I supply it, and then never hear anything back. Posting pics or templates to the gallery - I don't expect anything because I know it's a public gallery. No -- big -- deal.
Cakepro...i gotta agree with you on this one.
I mean...getting a comment is nice, but to me not necessary. And if I asked a question and it wasn't answered i would just figure someone was busy or didn't see it. I guess i never put that much thought into what goes on in the galleries...its a nice place to put your pictures or look at others for ideas, but I don't really get excited about all of the "rules" of it.
I'm not trying to be snippity here....but I just noticed that you are saying you will not write someone if you do not have time...yet if someone does not reply to your PM, you think its rude? Maybe they are just as busy as you are?
It does seem like a contradiction, true...but I figure, if someone posts a question in the gallery, 99% of them never come back to see it. Sometimes I'll answer the questions on gallery pics, sometimes not.
However, if someone contacts me directly to ask me a question, especially with a request for instructions that take some time to compose, and then never responds to my reply to them, I think that's a little rude...but I have the memory of a goldfish so it's quickly forgotten.
I never ignore PM's, even if it takes me a few days to get to them. The difference I am talking about is generalized comments/questions in the gallery vs. direct communication via PM or email.
Take it as a compliment that someone added your cake to their Favorites. IMO needing comments is a bit much.
saying "thank you" is not a bit much
With all due respect, I think expecting a "thank you" everytime someone uses one of the 82 templates you posted is a bit much. 
You posted them for people to use, right?
Guess we'll just have to agree to disagree, but thanks in advance if I ever use one of your templates! 
saying "thank you" is not a bit much
With all due respect, I think expecting a "thank you" everytime someone uses one of the 82 templates you posted is a bit much.
You posted them for people to use, right? Guess we'll just have to agree to disagree, but thanks in advance if I ever use one of your templates!
WARNING -- vent ahead
call me old fashioned (just not old --yet!) but
I was taught when someone gives you something to use, you say THANK YOU -- simple polite manners
which leads to the whole issue of our modern I'M ENTITLED and I DON'T HAVE TO SAY THANKYOU TO ANYONE FOR ANYTHING --- its MINEEEEE !!!!!! by divine right is would seem.
our society is morphing into a very surly, narcissistic group of self-seekers who are so enamored with how GOOD they are that they feel no obligation to others let alone the need for decent manners.
I lay part of blame on my own profession -- education -- with its whole "self esteem" movement -- the child is wonderful and everything the child does is wonderful and gets a gold star -- no matter how bad or a piece of doo-doo it really is --- well there got the standards down the toilet!
and we see the effects -- 50% divorce rate, hate crimes, etc. -- after all "I" come first!
interesting -- someone mentioned in another thread that spouse had given up major "tool/toy" so person could get more cake stuff -- but I wonder has that person ever given up getting cake stuff to allow spouse to get a "toy"? (even that annoys me -- the spouse's tool if but a "toy"???? well couldn't the same be said for all the cake stuff WE accumulate!?!? in the eyes of others or spouses?
-------
YES -- I do think -- and many others seem to agree what with all the whining about "so-n-so copied MY cake and didn't give ME any credit for inspiring them or ask MY permission or say is was a copy of MY design" going on in thread after thread. -- Seems we all agreed you MUST give credit where credit is due
and saying Thank You! is the simplest way of doing that.
Doug, will you come and teach at my son's school??
Doug, will you come and teach at my son's school??
do they need a theatre teacher who'll set high standards and demand dedication and high quality work?!
(oh, yes ....and how's the pay? do they offer "combat" pay for fighting all the snow you've been having!?!?!?!)
(grew up central IL so....familiar w/ the general territory!)
I've no idea what they need in the way of teachers but I'd just love to have my son in contact with someone in the teaching profession who cares that they grow up with common sense and good manners, second only to parents who should care even more!!
Well being new here, I will start this off by a huge "Thank You". Unfortunately, I have not left comments at every cake or a thank you for every photo. So knowing now that maybe I should I would like to thank all the posting members of CC as there are way to many that I should be grateful too.
I too have just gotten a few photos posted and had so many incoming emails with comments and not questions that sometimes it was hard to get to them.
Now I have had the experience of being PM'd and have answered those people a few times. I have not gone back to check my photos to respond since I have been too busy looking at all of yours.
I know that cake baking is time consuming and I did not know that all photos needed a reply or response or comment. Plus don't forget about the addiction too which takes time of reading all the posts and problems.
As for printing the photos well unfortunately, I like keeping in space since it does not take a tree worth of paper and I for one would rather have the real live tree standing that a pile of beautiful photos collecting dust until I want inspiration again.
So thanks so much for all the photos. I do not copy cakes but they inspire me on the dullest of days.
Regards,
Claire
Hi,I am new ,I have been a member since last September and I just had time to figure out how to upload pics. I recieved a lot of comments and questions, which excites me greatly.I just have not figured out how I am suppose to reply. So bear with us new comers till we figure out the ropes. Thanks
I for one have been enjoying looking at your cakes!!!! I think I have commented on several....Welcome to the forums as well!
Doug, I agree with you 100%!
Where my view diverges from yours lies in the expectation of receiving thanks for things I post here in the gallery...I post my stuff freely for all to use and don't expect to receive thanks. *Shrug* If I did, I'd probably have my panties in a bunch all the time. LOL
Well said Doug!!!!
My son just started talking....and one of the first things I wanted him to learn to say was please and thank you (course they sound like peas and dank you right now)......and its not just manners.....I think we offen forget common courtesy....the galleries in my opinion don't need "rules" we just need to remember common courtesy, treat others as we would like to be treated and mind our manners............what's wrong with all that????
PS I know some of you fabulous cake decorators get a ton of questions and comments...I don't expect that I always get answers to my questions....I understand you are busy people!!!! Aren't we all? That is another example of common courtesy....assume that the person is just too busy, not that its a blatent attempt to be rude to you. Somewhere along the line I think we forgot to think the best of people first.
Doug, I agree with you 100%!
Where my view diverges from yours lies in the expectation of receiving thanks for things I post here in the gallery...I post my stuff freely for all to use and don't expect to receive thanks. *Shrug* If I did, I'd probably have my panties in a bunch all the time. LOL
ah....but that's the POINT of good manners
that we set EXPECTATIONS for how people SHOULD behave ...
and then hold them to the expectations.
and when they don't we point out that the behavior is rude, uncouth, and unacceptable. it's called discipline -- both self and provided by others.
it's when we start making "allowances" -- excuses in different clothes -- that it all falls apart and we end up in the quagmire we're in now.
I will not say that I post pictures to get comments but they are nice to recieve if someone apperciated your work or even sees where it could use improvments I like to hear that just the same as I will leave a comment on a cake that struck me. it would be nice to know who the people are that added my cakes as there favorites just so I could thank them for the kind gesture. A little story I IM someone a month ago with a question about an fbct and they just got back to me today and yet I was still thankful they were able to write me back you do not know what is going on in someones life im happy that even though its to late for that particular cake this persons advice will help me in the future. and as far as common politeness goes we would all like to think that everyone here on cc are wonderful giving heartfelt people and I would stand to bet that most of us are I have truly been blessed with some of the help I have recieved from very kind people on this site. yet on the other hand there are some nasty people too I once recived and pm that was about me and clearly someone had meant to send it to someone else and had sent it to me on accident the letter went on and on about how awful and annoying i'am how I didnt play the game right I have since not been able to join in on any of the games in the lounge because I fear what people are saying behind my back. I know thats off the subject but it goes along the lines of commong curtosy I guess in today's world we cant expect everyone to have it even if they should.
I once recived and pm that was about me and clearly someone had meant to send it to someone else and had sent it to me on accident the letter went on and on about how awful and annoying i'am how I didnt play the game right I have since not been able to join in on any of the games in the lounge because I fear what people are saying behind my back. .
heather...OMG!!! That is just horrible. I hope you set that two-faced back stabber straight! Of all things...GAMES???? Now I've heard everything! 
I once recived and pm that was about me and clearly someone had meant to send it to someone else and had sent it to me on accident the letter went on and on about how awful and annoying i'am how I didnt play the game right I have since not been able to join in on any of the games in the lounge because I fear what people are saying behind my back. .
heather...OMG!!! That is just horrible. I hope you set that two-faced back stabber straight! Of all things...GAMES???? Now I've heard everything!
I did reply to the pm I simply said im sure you did not intend for me to recieve this email and im sorry that you feel I was disrupting your game had you simpy informed me that i was playing incorrectly I would have corrected myslef I didnt know the games were so particular. I had hoped she would feel bad that I had recieved the PM and write back to apologize but no such luck.
I once recived and pm that was about me and clearly someone had meant to send it to someone else and had sent it to me on accident the letter went on and on about how awful and annoying i'am how I didnt play the game right I have since not been able to join in on any of the games in the lounge because I fear what people are saying behind my back. .
heather...OMG!!! That is just horrible. I hope you set that two-faced back stabber straight! Of all things...GAMES???? Now I've heard everything!
I did reply to the pm I simply said im sure you did not intend for me to recieve this email and im sorry that you feel I was disrupting your game had you simpy informed me that i was playing incorrectly I would have corrected myslef I didnt know the games were so particular. I had hoped she would feel bad that I had recieved the PM and write back to apologize but no such luck.
You did the best thing. I'm sure she was mortified even though you got no response. Ha! I still can't believe it.
I do think manners are something that is sorely lacking, also discipline is not the norm these days, so many parents have the attitude that children must be free to do whatever they want to. I believe that if children are not disciplined & taught manners, they grow up NOT knowing there are bounderies, they have not been taught right from wrong so hence the, BAD language, bad attitude, bad manners & so many times this leads to worse things. Don't all jump on me at once!!! I must say I think it is sad that some people add a photograph to their favs. without commenting on the cake. That is just my take on the subject. I nearly didn't write this post as it seems I only open my mouth to change feet & it is never my intention to be rude.
I do think manners are something that is sorely lacking, also discipline is not the norm these days, so many parents have the attitude that children must be free to do whatever they want to. I believe that if children are not disciplined & taught manners, they grow up NOT knowing there are bounderies, they have not been taught right from wrong so hence the, BAD language, bad attitude, bad manners & so many times this leads to worse things. Don't all jump on me at once!!! I must say I think it is sad that some people add a photograph to their favs. without commenting on the cake. That is just my take on the subject. I nearly didn't write this post as it seems I only open my mouth to change feet & it is never my intention to be rude.
here here!! gmta!
...but that's the POINT of good manners
that we set EXPECTATIONS for how people SHOULD behave ...
and then hold them to the expectations.
and when they don't we point out that the behavior is rude, uncouth, and unacceptable.
LOL, well I guess you ought to make the first picture in your gallery a big warning poster telling people you expect them to send you a personal note of thanks for the use of your templates, and if they fail to meet your expectations, their behavior is rude, uncouth, and unacceptable. *Shrug*
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