I saw a post "Call me lefty" and thought...boy, I've lined up a few scars from doing dumb stuff. Ohh, I mean "Man stuff" according to my wife.
Thought it might be fun thread. I'll start.

1. I tried to impress a girl and jumped off a car while it was parked under a carport. Nail went in my head. But hey, Im normal! (a matter of some much debated opinion I hear). 16 stitches. Got the girl though (she felt sorry for me) Youth related
2. I threw a rock at my brother. Hit a tree and bounced back into my head. 6 stitches. Brotherly love.
3. Threw a rock at my brother. Got him. 60 stitches. Dad beat my arse. Still expressing love.
4. DIY wiring. Wiring my workshop light above my head. Pliers right into the ol eye. No stitches this time! Lucky not to look like Mad Eye Moody. New trend though...SAFETY GLASSES! Home related.
5. Hit by a car..while on foot. That sucked. Job related
6. Drug by a car. That really sucked. All 3 times. Job related
7. Broken ribs. Fighting. Job related
8. Broken fingers. Fighting. Job related
9. Dislocated elbow. Defensive tactics training. Yeah...that really helped. Some training. Job related
10. Rammed head on by a car. Sorta fun actually. Job related
11. Rolled my arm up in the automatic car window. Window broke. Alcohol involved. Dont ask. Youth related.
12. Kicked in the face. Broke a tooth. Job related.
13. Broke my right arm. Won the game. Got picked up on the teams shoulders....and they promptly dropped me. Ruined the moment. Youth. Rah Rah Rah.

Yup..still pretty normal!

I can only imagine what your company parties are like!

With the exception of my attack on Wednesday, i've only had a couple of mishaps:
Sister hit me in the head with a wrachet-that one rung my bell!
Fell out of bed while sleeping with my sister, cracked my head. Maybe I should stay away from my sister.
Tripped over a stuffed animal and broke my nose when I was 4
Broke a nail really bad when my girlfriend wrecked her dad's car while driving on a dirt road too fast chasing a boy she liked.

Oh. And there was obviously no turkey for Thanksgiving because I couldnt put it back in the oven after I'd hacked through it.

The turkey went into a soup pot and we had wine and side dishes.

It's all fun and games till someone gets a turkey in the eye!!!

Dale I hope that your job pays you good!! You are too much! I just love reading your posts!!

Me...

1. Brother hit me in the head with belt buckle and spit it wide open.
2. For revenge...pushed him off his big wheels and broke his two front teeth.
3. Was ice skating on a patch of ice in our drive way and fell and got a big painful goose egg with a cut on it on my forehead.
4. Most recently....Just a few months ago...got choked on cantaloupe at a restaurant. Hubby had to do the Heimlich on me at the buffet table!! Talk about frickin' embarrassing!! I have never walked back in that restaurant and now when we go out to eat the kids say "Mom you can't have any fruit!"

Those are my most traumatic things I can think of. Hugs, ~Denise


edited for my terrible spelling!

Can I tell one on my DH???? Of course, I never have anything happen to me!!!

My husband was playing hide 'n seek with our two boys. My daughter and I were in the house. We lived in a single wide trailer at the time. The boys ran under the trailer and my brilliant husband decided that he could do the same thing. Well, when he woke up he was in the process of getting twenty stitches across the top of his head. He had hit the beam that goes down the middle of the trailer. It shook the whole trailer.

I'm sure there is something that has happened to me, but it's much funner talking about my husband's exploits.

Dale..I think it's time to find a new job!!! LOL!

Ok, so mine aren't as accumalative as dale's are (thank goodness)

1) When I was little my parent's ran hog units. I was playing on top of a pile of feed sacks about 6 feet high and fell head first onto the cement isleway (i swear I am ok, however it is used as an excuse if I can't think of another, hehe)-under the age of 5
2) At a friends we were crawling off bunk beds and at the end they had a broken coat hook, caught it with the palm of my right hand and cut about 2", stoped within milimeters of my main blood vessel going through my wrist. Thankfully my friends mom was an emt, so no doctor visit for me and amazingly no stitches (i was throughly dissapointed) - around the age of 7
3) In junior high (two year is a row) I fell on ice, one in a skating rink the other on a side walk. First I broke my right hand, the next time I broke my left hand. And supposedly I broke the bone that is the hardest to break in your hand-some were between the end of your thumb and your first finger-but it was a bone that is in the middle of my hand-not near the outside.
4) The next year after my second hand break, I fell down the stairs at home and broke a couple bones behind my big toe in the right foot, was in a removable walking cast for 6 weeks.

So I think that is it, except for a few minor mishaps at work, but nothing to bad-no broken bones thank goodness, just a few scars.

Leily

That reminded me. Dh and I were going to a Mardi Gras ball and of course it had to start raining before we left. So I'm all dressed up and try to navigate the spiral staircase that led from our apartment and dh says "be careful, it's slippery" right about the time I slipped, put my heel thru my toe, broke it, cut it and ripped my hose. I still went-it was Harry Connick, jr's crew and I wasn't missing him or the parade!! Then I kicked the ironing board a couple months later and broke it again. So now I can tell when it's going to rain by my toe!!
The ball was great, btw! We were going again this year since it would have been our last year there but Katrina changed those plans!!

Now, where to begin...

1. Was cutting up chicken wings to make buffalo wings about a month ago when sharp knife slipped and cut off half my knuckle on ring finger...stitches

2. Broke left arm when I was about 5 from climbing...called myself helping my mom wallpaper...she didn't even want my help

3. Sprained ankle from walking down deck steps.

4. Went to Roses to purchase toilet seat...seats started falling from top shelf and I ended up with broken thumb and had to have surgery...didn't even get the seat

5. Outside playing barefooted and stepped on rake...had just gotten my ears pierced and they became infected along with my foot at the age of 8.

6. Numberous bumble bee stings...love to go barefooted when I was young.

7. Fell on stove couple of times when young...loved to climb.

8. Numberous black eyes from fighting neighborhood kids...hey, I stood my ground

9. Wire clothes hanger stuck up my nose in first grade...don't even ask

10. Stitches in forehead from car accident in 2003.

I will stop here because my list is getting to long

Well I only have one:
Celebrating my 20th wedding anniversary two year ago. House full of family cut my finger carving a turkey. finished my celebration in the emergency room was very happy until the next day when the pain kick in.

Ok these are the most resent. (last 6 yrs only)

3 yrs ago the day before thanksdiving washing machine had a tendancy to walk on me moving it back into place pinned my hand between washer and dryer breaking my hand. DH had to cook the entire meal because I could not.

4 yrs ago getting something out of the closet had my drill fall on my foot and break it.

6yrs ago after telling everyone in the house to be careful just washed the floor I was not paying attention and slipped on the floor and broke elbow.

6 yrs ago tearing down some trelles outside and I pulled it too hard and it fell on my both feet broke a total of 5 toes.

And leading the pack so far...by a nose...

Dang!!! I don't have anything nearly as exciting!!

!. Broke my knee cap and both bones in lower leg tyring to stop the glider on the swing set. INSISTED I was just fine and didn't need to go to the hospital (I was 5). Went and ended up in a cast for 10 weeks!

2. About 7 sliding down the stairs on my butt blowing in a wrapping paper roll as a horn. Hit the bottom of the stairs--wrapping paper roll went down my throat almost completely ripping out one of my tonsils. Because there was no ped-ENT doc on call that night--they sewed it back on instead of just taking it out!

3. 12/2/02 - car accident in my 6 month old minivan that I HATED from the moment I got it. Spun out in the snow and hit a tree. Broke collar bone. While sitting on the side of the road in the van waiting for rescue squad to arrive, ANOTHER van did the exact same thing hitting me head on. I jumped out of the van because by this point I was not seat belted. My van spun some more and pushed me face-first into the snowbank. LOVELY! It was my very first ride in an ambulance. OH, and I was 8 week pregnant at the time.

Thats about it for me. DALE--what do you do? Are you a cop? Your injury list sounds very much like a friend of mine who was an undercover drug detective. Quite an interesting career--not for the faint-hearted.

Lisa

Well my list is not as long or exciting as some, but certainly as dumb (LOL) ...

* crushed my foot in the spokes of a bicycle while double-riding with my sister... they had to cut 3 spokes before they could release my foot! (I'd been home from the hospital from a mystery illness for all of an hour so I was not interested in going ot a doctor either!)

* 2nd degree burns on my palm ... grabbed a bunsen burner ring about 10 seconds after turning off the burner (high school biology class!!)

* stabbed myself in the hand and went into shock ... trying to flip a piece of coconut out of the shell with a VERY large knife.. (I was about 10)

* gash in the back of the head... this one is REALLY stupid ... the phone rang one morning & I hopped out of bed too fast... got the phone and said.. "hello ... I don't feel very..." passed out and whacked my head on the radiator and then took a nice little visit to the hospital with a panicked boyfriend!

*screwed up my back ... tripped over the edge of the driveway at my in-laws' house (been there a million times, but I was carrying my 2YO son ... did a very interesting twist so I wouldn't land on top of him...OUCH!)

*popped an eardrum ... I sneezed underwater (need I say more?)

THIS is the funniest thread EVER!!! I'm dying of laughter...

i can't really think of any stories right now tho...except when i was a kid i was jumping around and i hit my chin on the stair rail and i got 2 stitches...no biggie...but thats it i think...

OK, I was talking to my mother and brother when I was younger, and was bragging about how smart I must have been and how great my vision is (10/10) when I ran into a wall, broke 3 of my right foots toes......

When I met my dh, I had two black eyes and a broken nose. I tripped in the dark and twisted my ankle - too painful to walk, so I fainted and landed flat on my face. Not a pretty sight!

Okay, I have a weak stomach and cannot even read the rest of these. Stopped reading after "leily". However, I too would like to know what kind of job Dale has???

I haven't had too much happen to me, but my DH has NUMEROUS injuries. One of the worst is when he was about 7 or 8 and he was mowing the grass with one of those old-fashioned lawn mowers that had the blades circle around. He wasn't paying attention and he ended up taking off his toe! (He was wearing flip flops). He still has his toe, but there is no feeling in it.

wow some of you have been through a lot. I agree weak stomach. I have only had a few injuries.

When I was like two I fell off of a riding toy shaped like a banana. Can someone says stupid. I mean who makes a riding toy shaped like a banana?? I rolled it forward , slid on my banana and crack my chin open on the cement. I busted it open once after having stitches also. I still have a litle scar there.
I have stepped on a nail. Blaim my dad who liked to fix houses. I used to have sprained ankles all the time! I just recently, yesterday, decided to reminicse about that and I have one now. Haven't done that since I was a kid.
The last thing I can think of is not my fault. Dh and I were messing around, well he was, shooting a bb gun in our back yard. I opened the back door and he pointed it at me so I slammed the door. He shot it anyways not thinking it would go through the door but it did and into my arm. I left it there for a week because he said it would "grow out" @@ A week later I was having outpatient surgery to get it out and had a couple stiches. We had been married exactly one month the day he shot me. I love to say that and make him feel like a heel.. haha

Well I also have to admit there are some strange injuries on here...but who am I to say because when I was young I was always very curious about weird things such as:
At age 4 or 5 I was watching my BIL fix a table lamp...well he left the shade off of it and I sat there wondering if it was hot...so I leaned over and laid my neck on it...YEP! It was hot...severly burned my neck...still have faint scars.
Age 8..was fooling around riding on a tiny trike that was wired together
turned it over...heavy wire gouged into my leg so I pulled it out...it slipped out of my hand went back into my leg below the first injury and then split my leg for about 5 inches..laid it open...stitches...BUT I kept my big butt off toys to little for me!
Age 6....this is the most stupid!!! The Electric men would come and work on the lines and they would leave pieces of coated wire that was different colors...well I would collect them and make jewelry. So one day I was on the back porch and I was making stuff out of the wire and I saw a hatchet laying on an old table...so I wondered if I could use it to cut the plastic coating from the wire...well I straightened a tiny piece took the hatchet and wacked it! Next thing I know the tip of my index finger was hanging by the corner! I never cried but I knew Mom would whip me for touching the hatchet...so I ran in the house and wrapped my hand in a pair of my new white underwear...bought for beginning the new school year...then I hid because my little cousin, who had been with me, had seen all of the blood and was screaming for dear life. Well needless to say Mom found me....and all that was holding the tip of my finger on was a small piece of skin. But she didn't whip me!
Sorry so graphic!
Debbie

LOL! at last...bertheren and sisteren in klutzyness!!

in our house the usual comment from mom was to the effect of:
"Now what did you do?!? Don't Drip!!!! Clean it up!" so much for sympathy

4-yr-old..."magic carpet" (throw rug) ride down hall, slam into door frame, and then smash 2 of 6 glass soda pop bottles at sitting by door. Large gash in head. Emergency room response by my dr and his nurse (my godmother): forget stiches, it'll heal, maybe the pain will teach him to be more careful next time (no, it didn't...very high threshold for pain here...needed and still need it!) added: shortly thereafter, sent hand through wringer on one of those old fashioned washers...thankfully nothing broken.

in quick succession around six: pealed skin off both knees (bicycle riding learning travails), glass in foot, nail through foot, bee sting in foot (and tonselectomy -- planned, not by cardboard tube(!) for good measure)

from 6-10 so many cuts and injuries, most involving knives, blades and glass that see mom's dialogue above.

10: the biggie -- fell on a picket fence, ripping right arm open at elbow all the way to the bone. first stiches (30 inside, 10 on top -- puts me in lead until nephew falls backwards onto glass-topped coffee table and does a number on his tookie) of course, this happened the day before we were to leave on vacation. Dr. said if I could get arm bent to point I could almost touch left sholder I could still go. Pain medication: aspirin -- see Dr.'s Comment for head gash at four (ya'd think he would have figured out by now pain wasn't going to teach me anything!) 6AM next day -- Mom--look-we can go!!!!! -- of course nearly got killed for waking her up so early

14: flipped out bike, gash to right knee, 7 stiches. Had to walk three miles to state park ranger station to call home.

since then no real big things yet, just lots of little misshaps (nails in hand, drill bit through finger -- both building sets, bloody salad due to chopping mishap, etc.

LMAO
Let's seee.... when I was around 6 years old my dad, myself and a friend who was up visiting with her parents were bowling at the local bowling alley across the parking lot from the building that we lived in (Red Wing MN The Pottery Building had apartments on the top floor that you could rent out..) well the bowling alley did not have shoes my size so I had to wear socks, Dad was being very good about not letting me carry this big heavy bowling bowl up by myself...welllll Dad that I was doing fine enough that I could carry the ball up by myself...NOT...I tripped on the step going up and konked my chin right on the ball and bit my lip all the way through, 4 stitches total- 2 inside and 2 outside....Dad flipped out!
Then a year or 2 later I was at a graduation party for someone in our congregation and I was racing a skateboard on the sidewalk....I wasn't paying attention and I ran into a bicycle and it ripped my left leg open right above my kneecap straight down to the bone...I have quite the scar because of the dumb ER doctor
Oh and then when I was pregnant with my son I landed in the ditch driving my car in bad weather because I thought "oh I can go just a little faster in this..it's not too bad....well that did not turn out so hot I ended up in the ditch and going for a ride to the hospital and then because of the "excitement" and because I was hungry I had to go to the Obstrestrics ward for observation (everything was fine...but I should tell you later about the hubby and how he reacted)..I'm sure there's more but I gotta go now..