More Stupid Advice To Brides!!!

Business By indydebi Updated 16 Mar 2013 , 6:47pm by BeesKnees578

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bisbqueenb Posted 30 Jul 2008 , 10:56pm
post #31 of 74

Here is the site:javascript:emoticon('icon_eek.gif')
Shocked

http://www.vagazette.com/features/custom/bridal/after/va-bridal-reception,0,3319866.htmlstory?coll=va-bridal-after

just in case you all want to see all of the article.javascript:emoticon('thumbsdown.gif')
Thumbs Down

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Alligande Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 11:59am
post #32 of 74

The cake advice is not the only bad advice. so is the info about tents. I don't know if this applies across the country, but since the Station Fire in Rhode Island, all fabric etc used in tents has to be fire retardant. It is strictly enforced here and I do know other states have adopted much tighter fire codes since that horrible fire.

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bethola Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 12:30pm
post #33 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Quote:
Originally Posted by varika

Wow, that article has some crappy advice in it! Like, renting linens and table places being more expensive than buying them--huhWHAT?


My local Sam's sells banquet linen tablecloths in packs of 3 for about $21 (approx $7 each). Or you can rent them for approx $7 each at the local party rental company.

But .....

I bought some linens to keep on hand, thinking it would be cost effective when I had a small (50-ish) event to use my own linens.

Then I took them to the cleaners .... icon_eek.gif ..... omg, it's cheaper to throw them away and buy new ones than it is to clean these things! Then you have to store them ... do you have any idea how much space 15 or 20 large tablecloths take up? Especially if you're a bride who isn't really planning on setting up 15 or 20 tables in her living room any time soon?

Yeah ... renting a linen for $7 is more expensive than buying the $2 plastic one .... but let's get real and compare apples to apples here.




OH YEAH! Found this out when I was going to take the church linens I borrowed to the cleaners. UHHHHH ARE YOU KIDDING? $12.00 EACH to launder? That was 4 years ago by the way. NOPE! Rental all the way....$4.00 each (just rented for this weekend) and WE DON'T DO LAUNDRY!

Re: Plasticware. I used it at my wedding 36 years ago and more and more of the girls at our church are doing that. Easy, fast, and the family doesn't spend HOURS cleaning up afterward. Sorry indydebi most of them can't afford a caterer. Plus, there is only one in our area and.......that's another thread! icon_biggrin.gif I say, whatever works....DO IT!

Oh and to the original post......DUM-O!

Beth

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terrig007 Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 12:44pm
post #34 of 74

IndyDebi, I just got around to reading this past Sundays Washington Post and this sounds like it came from there. They were profiling some couple in MD. Anyway, they talked of cake dummies as well. They didn't mention the amount of work that went into one unless it was pre-made already and they used that (they suggested the dummy with a real cake on top to cut). They went on to make equally stupid suggestions like having Uncle Harry take your pictures and using Aunt Jean's camcorder. I sent a letter to the Post this morning regarding this article. Wonder how many others they received?

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onceuponacake Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 1:04pm
post #35 of 74

i had a consultation with a bride she emailed and said she absolutely loved the cake..it was the best she'd ever tasted but she did have another appt with another cake decorator who quoted her $120.00 for a wedding cake for 100 and could I lower my price? icon_confused.gif

I told her glad you liked the cake.i know cost can be an issue, but i bake fresh, frosting is fresh, you want a premium flavor and you get a free anniversary cake on your first anniv.

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Curtsmin24 Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 1:42pm
post #36 of 74
Quote:
Quote:

The cake advice is not the only bad advice. so is the info about tents. I don't know if this applies across the country, but since the Station Fire in Rhode Island, all fabric etc used in tents has to be fire retardant. It is strictly enforced here and I do know other states have adopted much tighter fire codes since that horrible fire.




I agree. They have been real strict about everything up there. I was there last month and was shocked to hear that after 1:00am no entry or re-entry to bars and clubs downtown. That was new to me.

I don't like that article either but look at the economy. I was fine before but I am finding myself struggling right now. I wouldn't be getting married if I couldn't afford to. I had a simple wedding, me and hubby and that was it. Then again we were living in California then and both of our families were on the East coast. We were not paying for all of them to come see the ceremony. No one was there so it was very intimate and we had a romantic afternoon and evening without the headache of planning for a year and spending a lot...... I got a really nice size ring instead.

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aswartzw Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 2:45pm
post #37 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by terrig007

They went on to make equally stupid suggestions like having Uncle Harry take your pictures and using Aunt Jean's camcorder.




What's wrong with this?? More than likely, at my wedding, this is exactly what will happen. It's not stupid for someone trying to stay within a budget. Spending $4K on pictures and videography is stupid. Like seriously, who is ever going to watch their wedding video enough in their lifetime to warrant that kind of $$? Or spend that much on pictures that can be ruined in a flood, fire, etc.

I'm sorry but $20K for a wedding is stupid. That's a down payment for a house. Or I can buy a car with that. Weddings have gotten so obnoxious that I don't even enjoy going to fancy weddings. Simple weddings are so much better.

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aswartzw Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 2:59pm
post #38 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by rdiesing

Sandra Lee was quoted in that article. I never really liked her. No particular reason, just rubbed me the wrong way. Now I have a reason to hate her! Oooh, Ina Garten would kick her butt in a "semi-homemade" cake contest!




I don't really like her either. I like some of her ideas for decorating but my mom says that woman must always be drunk b/c she's always making drinks. icon_lol.gif Can you tell we don't drink in my family? LOL Plus she never gets good reviews on her food.

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michellenj Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 3:26pm
post #39 of 74

Personally, I would rather pay someone to video and take photographs of my wedding, because I would want my family members to be enjoying themselves at my celebration. Plus, in the event that there is a malfunction with the equipment, the professionals usually have a spare or some other way to take the pictures. And that way, if something happens, at least the hard feelings aren't within the family, they are a business transaction and you might have legal recourse.

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Aliwis000 Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 3:35pm
post #40 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw

Quote:
Originally Posted by terrig007

They went on to make equally stupid suggestions like having Uncle Harry take your pictures and using Aunt Jean's camcorder.



What's wrong with this?? More than likely, at my wedding, this is exactly what will happen. It's not stupid for someone trying to stay within a budget. Spending $4K on pictures and videography is stupid. Like seriously, who is ever going to watch their wedding video enough in their lifetime to warrant that kind of $$? Or spend that much on pictures that can be ruined in a flood, fire, etc.

I'm sorry but $20K for a wedding is stupid. That's a down payment for a house. Or I can buy a car with that. Weddings have gotten so obnoxious that I don't even enjoy going to fancy weddings. Simple weddings are so much better.




Your response is somewhat hostile. Why? Do some people go too far in their wedding spending? Yes. Must one always keep their head and understand that when working on a budget (as most of us do) that you might have to give up some of the things you want to make others work? Of course. But calling people who wish to spend 20K on a wedding (which is 10K lower then the national average I heard 2 weeks ago) 'stupid' is slightly rude. You are totally entitled to your opinion but some people feel differently and the plates they eat off of, and the food that is one them, and the out come of the pictures of their day are important to them. Going into massive debt for a wedding is not smart but if you have the money and are willing to spend it on what you want, why not do it?

Alicia

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aswartzw Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 4:03pm
post #41 of 74

I don't intend to come across hostile. I'm sincerely sorry if I do. I just get frustrated by people bashing wedding columns and calling them stupid (as the PP mentioned) simply because they don't agree with them. This is the only reason I even mentioned the word "stupid" as this is not in my common vocabulary. I swear it isn't! icon_surprised.gif

In a way, I guess I do take it personally because whenever somebody else comments on brides using Costco cakes or stuff it's a horrible thing and people won't ever remember their wedding cake (as PP said).

So many people talk horribly about grocery store cakes or Costco cakes and make it sound like that cake doesnt' even matter. I have been to many weddings where the grocery store cake tasted better and looked better than bakery cakes.

I just getting tired of seeing so many threads on here putting wedding advice down b/c it's supposed to help the bride do things on a budget. It's one thing for a bride to expect a bakery style cake on a grocery budget (and I'm apalled by this also) or a dummy cake (that is pretty crazy advice) but I feel like some of the comments on here can really make people with small budgets (like me) feel inferior b/c plastic tablecloths aren't as good or such.

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aswartzw Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 4:10pm
post #42 of 74

[quote="Aliwis000]You are totally entitled to your opinion but some people feel differently and the plates they eat off of, and the food that is one them, and the out come of the pictures of their day are important to them. [/quote]

This is my point exactly. You make it sound like none of this stuff is important to people with a smaller budget. On the contrary it is, those with smaller budgets just have to get creative. If pictures weren't important to them, why have them at all? They are so they have a family member take them who likes to do this stuff.

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Denise Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 4:38pm
post #43 of 74

The advice in the article was fine if you are on a really tight budget. Heck, anyone can bake a cake or make desserts to set out, spin their own DVD's to play, make their own invites, etc.

But if someone is after a "look" those just won't help unless your aunt is a cake decorator, your cousin is a pro photographer, and grandma is a dress designer extraordinaire, and brother just happens to be a chef.

For some people that happens. My nephew is getting married next year. His fiance's aunt owns a bakery in Houston, I am a cake decorator and my son who is super close to his cousin is a budding chef who has been the head cook at a local restaurant. So some of the issues may be taken care of but those are few and far between.

As for weddings that cost $30k or more, I have made cakes for those weddings and so has some of my local cake decorating friends. For some people $30k is nothing. I have an extremely wealthy cousin whom also LOVES to throw parties. When his daughter gets married, I will make the cake (for free gratis) and I am sure the sky will be the limit - and his sky is pretty big. He just built at 14,000 sq. foot mansion and he has people wanting to use the lawns for bridal portraits. So for him to drop 100k on a wedding would be no skin off of his backside.

When my daughter gets married...it will be at HIS house using his party stuff!! LOL that is the beauty of having a darling cousin whom is also loaded.

I say that if someone can't afford it Walmart is just fine - but on the other hand - don't expect me to make you a cake with quality ingredients and hand sculpted gum paste flowers for what you would pay at Walmart. You get what you pay for...be it cake or dress!

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terrig007 Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 4:49pm
post #44 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw

Quote:
Originally Posted by terrig007

They went on to make equally stupid suggestions like having Uncle Harry take your pictures and using Aunt Jean's camcorder.



What's wrong with this?? More than likely, at my wedding, this is exactly what will happen. It's not stupid for someone trying to stay within a budget. Spending $4K on pictures and videography is stupid. Like seriously, who is ever going to watch their wedding video enough in their lifetime to warrant that kind of $$? Or spend that much on pictures that can be ruined in a flood, fire, etc.

I'm sorry but $20K for a wedding is stupid. That's a down payment for a house. Or I can buy a car with that. Weddings have gotten so obnoxious that I don't even enjoy going to fancy weddings. Simple weddings are so much better.




There is nothing wrong with this but you better make sure that the Uncle takes decent pictures and that the Aunt's camcorder works as well. My cousin had her new husband's Uncle take the pictures, they were horrible and this guy professed to be a great picture taker. Another friend borrowed her cousin's camcorder-for whatever reason there was nothing on the tape. Good for you if that's what you want, this is a free country and people can buy a house instead or what have you. I had the video and the big photographer but I also worked two jobs for it but it was my choice to do so. There are some who want more than a simple wedding and you shouldn't mock them for doing so. It is the day for the bride and groom and it's their wishes that should be granted whether it be a big wedding or a small wedding. I was just trying to point out that the paper was giving some misinformation about the cake situation and that not everyone has luck with Uncle Harry's camera skills. Hope that you do have luck with your family camera skills if you go that route. It certainly is your choice but that is no reason to be so snippy about people who decide to go the other route.
I'm sorry if you took offense to my using the word "stupid" because a lot of the advice they gave I thought was. Again, that's my opinion and if you're offended by it, well I thought a lot of the advice was stupid but I don't believe we were reading from the same article as this was a different one linked than the one in the Washington Post

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varika Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 5:11pm
post #45 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw

I don't intend to come across hostile. I'm sincerely sorry if I do. I just get frustrated by people bashing wedding columns and calling them stupid (as the PP mentioned) simply because they don't agree with them. This is the only reason I even mentioned the word "stupid" as this is not in my common vocabulary. I swear it isn't! icon_surprised.gif




I personally think this is bad advice, in this particular column, because it's poorly researched and clearly biased toward a particular store. (Walmart is mentioned at least twice and no other store is mentioned by name AT ALL.)

Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw

In a way, I guess I do take it personally because whenever somebody else comments on brides using Costco cakes or stuff it's a horrible thing and people won't ever remember their wedding cake (as PP said).




From a standpoint of decorating, that...really tends to be true, from what I've seen. At least in this area, the grocery store doesn't give you much range in decoration. You get one of their templates, and that's it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw

So many people talk horribly about grocery store cakes or Costco cakes and make it sound like that cake doesnt' even matter. I have been to many weddings where the grocery store cake tasted better and looked better than bakery cakes.




You take a risk with any decorator, from the decorating standpoint. The taste of it, for me, isn't as much of an issue, though the cake flavor at my grocery store is limited pretty strictly to yellow cake or heavy chocolate. My only objection to that advice in the article was the implication that it would not LOOK like a Costco cake, and it's going to. If that's not important, or if that look satisfies the bride and groom, that's fine. But don't tell me that bargain-basement plastic shoes are going to look exactly like $100 Steve Maddens, either. I'll probably go with the bargain-basement shoes, but not because I expect they'll look like Steve Maddens.

Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw

I just getting tired of seeing so many threads on here putting wedding advice down b/c it's supposed to help the bride do things on a budget. It's one thing for a bride to expect a bakery style cake on a grocery budget (and I'm apalled by this also) or a dummy cake (that is pretty crazy advice) but I feel like some of the comments on here can really make people with small budgets (like me) feel inferior b/c plastic tablecloths aren't as good or such.




It's not that plastic tablecloths aren't as good. Plastic tablecloths are a completely different look from linen tablecloths, though. Yes, if you go with the cheapest plastic plates, plastic silverware, and plastic tablecloths, you will not spend as much as you would on rented linens and fine china. You will also not have a fine-china look to your reception.

Just to give you an example, if I were using plastics, I would probably do an outdoor reception, or at minimum a garden-party or barbecue-themed wedding. Maybe even a luau. I would splurge on Chinette plastics as opposed to white paper plates, and I would plan my menu to accomodate the weaknesses of those plates. I would get really festive tablecloths and decorate them to match my theme. And then people would come and go, "Wow, this is an AWESOME WEDDING!"

I would NOT buy paper plates and plastics and try to set them up to look like the most elegant restaurant in New York City, because it wouldn't work. The plate you eat on DOES affect your feelings, even if you don't realize it. If you're trying to put lobster bisque into a styrofoam bowl, and filet mingon on cheap paper plates, people are more likely to remember it as dry or tasteless or cheap than they are if you heap barbecued ribs and brisket on a paper plate. And if you put barbecue ribs and brisket on fine china, you're likely to get the same feelings!

There's nothing wrong with tight-budget weddings. There IS something wrong with not understanding that you get what you pay for, so make sure you know and plan accordingly.

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Solecito Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 5:39pm
post #46 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by varika




It's not that plastic tablecloths aren't as good. Plastic tablecloths are a completely different look from linen tablecloths, though. Yes, if you go with the cheapest plastic plates, plastic silverware, and plastic tablecloths, you will not spend as much as you would on rented linens and fine china. You will also not have a fine-china look to your reception.

Just to give you an example, if I were using plastics, I would probably do an outdoor reception, or at minimum a garden-party or barbecue-themed wedding. Maybe even a luau. I would splurge on Chinette plastics as opposed to white paper plates, and I would plan my menu to accomodate the weaknesses of those plates. I would get really festive tablecloths and decorate them to match my theme. And then people would come and go, "Wow, this is an AWESOME WEDDING!"

I would NOT buy paper plates and plastics and try to set them up to look like the most elegant restaurant in New York City, because it wouldn't work. The plate you eat on DOES affect your feelings, even if you don't realize it. If you're trying to put lobster bisque into a styrofoam bowl, and filet mingon on cheap paper plates, people are more likely to remember it as dry or tasteless or cheap than they are if you heap barbecued ribs and brisket on a paper plate. And if you put barbecue ribs and brisket on fine china, you're likely to get the same feelings!

There's nothing wrong with tight-budget weddings. There IS something wrong with not understanding that you get what you pay for, so make sure you know and plan accordingly.




Very well put!!!

And in my opinion, a lot of us think that such articles are bad advice because makes peolpe think we are insane to charge what we do for cakes, and hurts our business.

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aswartzw Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 6:11pm
post #47 of 74

Totally agree, varika!!! thumbs_up.gif Excellently put.

I just think so many CCers have had enough bad experience with brides that it's easy to be extremely critical of these wedding advice columns. But I just want them to know by being critical of these budget ideas they are coming across critical of those who must use these ideas for their own weddings. It does hurt! icon_redface.gif

In my hurt (many criticized ALL my family's, friends' and acquaintances' weddings, including my sisters!) I overreacted and used some harsh words that I really didn't intend and I do apologize. I have only attended 3 weddings with cloth tablecloths and 2 with a buffet. All the others have been potlucks, cheap plastic tablecloths, etc. They were all beautiful and the bride and groom were happy and didn't miss anything.

For those who can afford more expensive weddings, I'm happy for you. I'm sure they were gorgeous and you had what you want and you will remember it all. I was simply upset by the reasons previously stated and I wrongly lashed out.

Terrig, I did read the post. Outside of the stingy bride keeping those on her list who will buy better presents, the crazy fake cake, and the shared flower thing (what???) nothing else was wrong with the suggestions. In fact, they've already been done by my friends and their weddings were gorgeous!!

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lillicakes Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 6:11pm
post #48 of 74

It isn't the idea of helping people save money that is objectionable, but the giving of bad advice. Advice that is based on incorrect factual assumptions (flour, sugar, butter....makes shortbread?) is worse than advice that is just "bad" because it doesn't match someone's opinion.

Event planning on a budget, as many things in life, has to be about balancing priorities. For people watching their nickels, they need to save when they can and pay the long price when they have to, for the things that are really important to them.

For some couples, the big ticket item is the ring, or the gown, and the heck with the rest of the reception. For some it is the venue, or the flowers, or whatever. My personal feeling is (and was at my wedding, which was an awesome party and definitely the best thing in the whole marriage....), I want people to have a great time and have fond memories of the occasion. To me, that means they need to be comfortable, entertained, and fed well. I wanted a swankier feel (waiters carrying hors d'ouvres around after the champagne toast and so on), and decided that I would rather have less people and be able to invest more in the ambience and the food. That was my choice. I have also gone to some outdoor weddings that, while more casual, were excellent in term of my "have guests get good memories" requirement--an event can be festive and enjoyable without being formal, as long as the theme and variety of food, drinks, setting, etc. are consistent. Cheap in price doesn't have to mean "cheap."

Anyway, since a cake is part of the ambience and part of the food, it is up there on my list of priorities. Therefore, I think it is reasonable for people to invest in the cake. But not everyone feels that way.

Someone posted a Judge Judy clip about a case over a dry wedding cake, and Judge Judy said "no one eats the cake." A lot of people don't eat the cake, because they have been trained from attending other weddings that wedding cake is noxious. The brides I have worked with wanted a cake that looked nice, fit their theme, and tasted good, with the taste being probably the most important part.

I guess the short point is, if a person has cake on the "low priority" list, they might be receptive to the point of view in the article. If a person values the cake more highly, I don't think an article like that is going to convert them.

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terrig007 Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 6:21pm
post #49 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw




Terrig, I did read the post. Outside of the stingy bride keeping those on her list who will buy better presents, the crazy fake cake, and the shared flower thing (what???) nothing else was wrong with the suggestions. In fact, they've already been done by my friends and their weddings were gorgeous!!




I'm glad that they all had lovely weddings. I was in no way trying to put down anyone and their thoughts or ideas. Not everyone wants a simple wedding but you said they were the best. It's each individual's choice and I've been to just as many simple weddings as other types. I had fun at each type and they all were special. As you are tired of people who say things about those weddings which are less formal, I'm tired of people who lash out at those of us who had weddings that were more formal. It does get tiring hearing from people who had a good time at my wedding how much it cost and how we could have done X, Y or Z with what it cost. So I hope you understand that in no way I was putting down what a bride or groom wants for their special day.

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aswartzw Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 6:24pm
post #50 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by terrig007

Quote:
Originally Posted by aswartzw




Terrig, I did read the post. Outside of the stingy bride keeping those on her list who will buy better presents, the crazy fake cake, and the shared flower thing (what???) nothing else was wrong with the suggestions. In fact, they've already been done by my friends and their weddings were gorgeous!!



I'm glad that they all had lovely weddings. I was in no way trying to put down anyone and their thoughts or ideas. Not everyone wants a simple wedding but you said they were the best. It's each individual's choice and I've been to just as many simple weddings as other types. I had fun at each type and they all were special. As you are tired of people who say things about those weddings which are less formal, I'm tired of people who lash out at those of us who had weddings that were more formal. It does get tiring hearing from people who had a good time at my wedding how much it cost and how we could have done X, Y or Z with what it cost. So I hope you understand that in no way I was putting down what a bride or groom wants for their special day.




icon_wink.gif

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jibbies Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 7:11pm
post #51 of 74

icon_surprised.gif
I think I just stumbled across one of those threads we were talking about yesterday. icon_lol.gif

Jibbies

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marknelliesmum Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 7:13pm
post #52 of 74

At the risk of getting my head on a plate ( would that be a classy or cheap wedding? would probably depend on the plate used! icon_lol.gif ) I think people in general can unwittingly hit a raw nerve regarding this topic. Obviously the decorators have a living to make and it must be very tiresome having brides wanting a $2000 cake for $150 or being compared to cakes which do not have the same effort and expense put into them. Also some people's 'bargain basement' items are another persons 'top of the range' because that is just life. We all have different tastes and incomes and have the right to choose what we like or dislike. On several threads I have read comments which could be misconstrued as mean or a bit uppity regarding eg. walmart cakes but i genuinely don't think anyone is having a go at people on a budget that is different to what they themselves can afford. Something has usually happened and the person is venting their frustration at their time being wasted or whatever and as i said unwittingly makes a comment that can cause offense when none is intended. I think we all need to be a bit less sensitive as sometimes it's hard to articulate what you are trying to say without causing offense to someone.
That said if this has caused offense to anyone....tough! icon_mad.gif Only joking icon_lol.gif I do sincerely apologise if I am talking out of turn since I just barged into this thread. This place is such a helpful, wonderful site - it just makes me sad when all the kindness, help and support gets overshadowed by someone getting hold of the wrong end of the stick.

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varika Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 7:52pm
post #53 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by marksmum

At the risk of getting my head on a plate ( would that be a classy or cheap wedding? would probably depend on the plate used! icon_lol.gif )




Ow, my brain! Two conflicting snarks for response...

1) "depends on whether you had your hair done or not!"
2) "Wow, that cake could cost more to make than the five-tiered thingee!"

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marknelliesmum Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 8:01pm
post #54 of 74

icon_lol.gif Fair point - well i've never thought of myself as classy and i'm not a girly girl so there's little chance of my hair being done and zero chance of me wearing makeup... so i guess the cake will be stunning! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

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indydebi Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 8:32pm
post #55 of 74

we're kind of zero-ing in on the photographer thing here, but I tell ALL of my brides, "You can skimp on anything in your wedding but do NOT skimp on your photographer!"

The music will be a faded memory, the food will be eaten, the flowers will be dead, but your pics are what you will be looking at on your 25th anniversary.

True story from a photographer friend: Bride wanted to hire him. Mom wanted "Uncle Bob" to do the pics. Uncle Bob missed the cake cutting, missed the bouquet toss, missed shots the bride specifically wanted of great-gramma, missed the couple leaving in the limo .... 'coz Uncle Bob found a comfy seat at the bar and spent most of the night there. Uncle Bob probably took less than 100 pics at this wedding.

Mama spent over $100,000 on this wedding (photographer was told this by the bride) but went all cheap on the one thing that lasts forever. She spent that much money on this event and didn't want to pay to document and record it.

I think someone already said it but I'll throw it out again. I'm not against having Uncle Bob do the pics, or Aunt Sally do the cake .... IF THEY KNOW HOW TO DO THOSE THINGS! If your car breaks down, you wouldn't have cousin Billy-Bob fix your car if Billy Bob isn't a mechanic and knows nothing about cars!! But for some silly reason, it's logical to ask anyone who owns a camera to take pics. I own tools .... but I can't fix a car.

I also find it frustrating that brides want the Waldorf Estoria setting, but that's all they can afford so they do everything else in the plastic tablecloth and paper plates motif. It just doesn't work.

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mommyle Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 9:17pm
post #56 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by rwarhank

Quote:
Quote:

Remember, all cakes are created equal â flour, sugar, and butter


You know "All men are created equal-snakes, and snails, and puppy dog tails...




Honey, that's why men wear pants... So we can tell them apart!!!

Adding in...

My mom had her BIL take her nursing graduation photos years ago. She was a beautiful sight and so thrilled. He hated to tell her that he forgot to put the film in the camera...

At my wedding a couple of years ago we had a professional photographer, who took some excellent shots, and all of the shots that we wanted. We also had all of our friends' cameras and SD cards and loaded all of the photos that they took into my computer, and you know, I bet that half of my wedding album has photos from friends and family in it. I highly recommend one person to be responsible for the "important" shots and to direct the photography (you know, the important group shots and so forth), but by all means, use all the great photos you can!!!

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Solecito Posted 31 Jul 2008 , 9:36pm
post #57 of 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by marksmum

At the risk of getting my head on a plate ( would that be a classy or cheap wedding? would probably depend on the plate used! icon_lol.gif ) I think people in general can unwittingly hit a raw nerve regarding this topic. Obviously the decorators have a living to make and it must be very tiresome having brides wanting a $2000 cake for $150 or being compared to cakes which do not have the same effort and expense put into them. Also some people's 'bargain basement' items are another persons 'top of the range' because that is just life. We all have different tastes and incomes and have the right to choose what we like or dislike. On several threads I have read comments which could be misconstrued as mean or a bit uppity regarding eg. walmart cakes but i genuinely don't think anyone is having a go at people on a budget that is different to what they themselves can afford. Something has usually happened and the person is venting their frustration at their time being wasted or whatever and as i said unwittingly makes a comment that can cause offense when none is intended. I think we all need to be a bit less sensitive as sometimes it's hard to articulate what you are trying to say without causing offense to someone.
That said if this has caused offense to anyone....tough! icon_mad.gif Only joking icon_lol.gif I do sincerely apologise if I am talking out of turn since I just barged into this thread. This place is such a helpful, wonderful site - it just makes me sad when all the kindness, help and support gets overshadowed by someone getting hold of the wrong end of the stick.





Amen sister!!

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aswartzw Posted 1 Aug 2008 , 3:57am
post #58 of 74

Indydebi, it's so funny. I know as many people who's photographer's ruined the wedding and they were professionals! icon_eek.gif I know of some who forgot the film or the flash ended up not working or they just did a really awful job on the photography. In the end, the couple wished they had a family member take it b/c they would've done just as well in the end (if not better!) icon_lol.gif I am disappointed more often than not in the wedding pictures I've seen by professionals (must be the area!)

And I didn't even know videographers existed until 8 years ago! icon_redface.gif

I guess it just depends on what we've all been exposed to, what we're used to, etc.

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Chef_Stef Posted 1 Aug 2008 , 5:35am
post #59 of 74

"All cakes are created equal" ..... icon_confused.gif *snort* I don't THINK so


And yes, do be careful with the homegrown photogs, or you could end up like DH and me, watching our wedding video, which lasts...precisely until he reaches for the ring. At which point the ...freakin' camera battery DIED because Favorite Old Family Friend was too busy using the dam thing all night the night before at the rehearsal dinner, and filming us all getting ready for the wedding (me all cranky and everything). So we have...HALF a wedding.

I'm still mad after 17 years, and the poor guy's dead already. You'd think I could let it go...

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terrig007 Posted 1 Aug 2008 , 11:01am
post #60 of 74

Homecook, my cousin has been married 21 years and having her husband's Uncle take those terrible pictures are still a sore spot and that guy has been dead for 15 years.
Indydebi, is absolutely right, at the end of the day and for years to come the food is gone, the flowers gone and the cake has long been eaten but on our anniversary we pull out the video and pop it in the VCR and even though we've been married 8 years my wedding album is still on my coffee table and I probably look at it once or twice a month and wonder what happened to that young, somewhat thin looking girl? icon_wink.gif
Heck even my friends who are divorced treasure their pics and in a few cases they had to have them copied for their ex husband's (again through the original photographer) as many deceased relatives & friends were in that album and each wanted pics of these people who were close to them.

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