So I had a really long post I was typing to basically get everything off my chest about my disaster from this past week when the site decided to have an error . I am not retyping all that .

This ended up being long but not as long and you don't have to read it. I just need to vent.

But basically if it could go wrong then it did go wrong . To the point where I don't know if I should be doing this anymore. My husband says I am overreacting. I am a perfectionist. I am never completely happy with my creations. I always see something I could have done better. But this was beyond bad for me. Our friends said it looked great. People at the venue said it was beautiful. I thought it was terrible . Not what I wanted for it and probably not what the bride envisioned. To top it all off I didn't get a single picture of the grooms cake or wedding cake when completed . And I am afraid to ask the bride if she has any. I had guests come up to me and tell me how gorgeous it was but it was not to my standards AT ALL . Not a single thing went right . I allotted two days for 15 sugar flowers. more than enough time for me to do them. I started on Monday and when Wednesday night rolled around I WAS STILL WORKING ON THEM. I kept breaking them or dropping and shattering them. They are so fragile. I wanted to bake Wednesday and half of Thursday if needed . I ended up baking all of Thursday and most of Friday. Mainly because my oven sucks once again, after I had got it fixed and has been working fine. It decided to act up again at the best time possible.

I am so disappointed in myself over this. I don't know if I should keep doing this. The no pictures thing is killing me too. I have some images of the sugar flowers and the bottom tier. But that's about it. The SPS system didn't work out. The pillars kept cracking when cutting them. Never had that problem before . The sugar flowers sank into the cake when transporting it. Never had that problem before. My MMF was a disaster kept sticking to the table and it took HOURS to cover the cakes. Never had that problem before. The bride paid for custom sugar lace on the cake but she couldn't get me a piece of lace from her dress. So I had to do it off of images she took of her dress. I made stencils and did hand brush emboidery. Didn't come out the way I think she was envisioning and definitely not the way I wanted . But she only sent me 3 pictures. When I asked for more she didn't get that email , so I never got extra detail pictures.

The grooms cake didn't come out at all like I wanted. Mainly because of my issues with my fondant. But the glasses I made to go with it dropped and broke, gelatin shatters too apparently .

one tier was a dummy and I am supposed to get that tier back but i am too afraid to contact her to get it back. I can't remember if they were going on their honeymoon right away or not. I am playing the wait and see game.

the way I feel right now I shouldn't be doing this be I probably ruined their day. My friends that transported the cake for me thought it was gorgeous. People at the venue thought it was gorgeous. One woman came up to me and told me that no one realizes how much time goes into making cakes.. So she either makes cakes, used to make cakes, or knows someone who makes cakes. She though it was beautiful and told me not to worry. It the guests aren't the ones that matter. The bride and groom do. She wasn't a bridezilla but she definitely had a particular image in her head .

The pic below is the cake she wanted but with my sugar flowers and her lace. Her colors were champagne, ivory, and blush. I had a blush swatch but no swatches for the other colors. I find out Thursday's afternoon that The reception in the wedding are in the same exact room! On her contract she put the reception was at 5 PM and didn't mention that the wedding is in the same exact room. I found this out when I called the venue to set up a drop off time. Which the woman there told me to drop it off whenever I wanted the door would be open. So I was dropping off the cake turn open venue with not a single soul in it. That didn't sound great to me. But the fact that my timeline just got shorter was worrisome. Then the bride called to see how everything was and I mentioned to her the whole 330 versus five thing and she didn't seem concerned. I ended up dropping it off at three completely put together but I didn't want to do that. I like to set up on site.

I am worried because the bride was not a bridezilla but she was very particular in what she wanted. I think she had a certain image in your head and I probably didn't deliver that. One of the tiers was a dummy. I was supposed to get this from her after the wedding but I'm afraid to contact her just in case she's upset. But they also might be on their honeymoon I can't remember if they were going on that right after the wedding .

I am mainly up a set with myself. I'm very particular on detail I feel like I didn't come through with this cake. To top it off, I had a small 6 inch gluten-free ombre rosette cake for friends baby shower on Sunday and I ended up not bringing it. Granted that was one of two cakes that was supposed to be there and the only people upset were me and the other gluten-free person. But the reason I didn't bring it was because I sliced a chunk out of my finger on my agbay. Because sleep deprivation and rushing is not OK when you operate an agbay. I am hoping that ends my week from hell because I started on Monday and had to end on the Sunday.

This is the cake she wanted with my sugar flowers and her lace and then the only images I have of what I did are below that. Hopefully this rant will make me feel better.

i'm sorry you cut yourself and that you had the week from hell -- probably  it's not as bad as you think -- especially when you say "not a single thing went right" i mean the cakes got delivered so that went right -- you received many compliments that went right -- a stranger even commiserated with you about how taxing making cakes can be that was not only right it was sweet -- 

not a single thing went right of the things you are focusing on though -- i get it i've been there -- and hopefully this one will make or break you -- so you can proceed happier one way or another -- 

some cakes just keep us overwhelmed and this was yours -- i hope you can refocus and learn to love your work -- sometimes we fill ourselves with so much expectation we have no room for anything else so our coping skills are muted/cut off -- you just need a big breather and this stuff about cakes being perfect is wearing you out so the only thing you can change is your outlook for going forward --

so best to you from me and consider 'best to you' from you too -- give yourself some credit for crying out loud -- if you got great compliments rest a little in that -- you think they were lying --

best to you but more importantly go look in the mirror and say "best from you to you" repeat it a few times...every day

oh and that's an important question to ask at every consult -- where/when is the wedding where/when is the reception -- see it was good that you learned that --

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this doing wedding cakes thing takes a steady hand and steely nerves -- it really does -- you may not be cut out for this brand of caking -- maybe you would do well with competition cakes where you could get every detail microscopically perfect or do non-wedding events -- but feeling like this every time would make me quit because it would effect everyone around me too -- so i hope you see your way through this -- but it's a hard row to hoe -- you have to roll with the punches

oh ow, I cut myself on the agbay before, just about cut my finger off. That alone would make for a bad week.

Based on the photos and the reaction of people, you don't have anything to worry about. Decorators are much harder on themselves and each other than the general public, and really, your flowers are prettier than the blah ones on the original cake.

Oh, sweetie, the photos you do have show beautiful work.  I can't imagine the complete cake was anything but lovely.  I'm betting that your week was just so exhausting that your feeling of the cake is skewed.  

Thanks everyone! Yeah,  I am being really hard on myself. I think my biggest thing is that I can't go back and see that I am overreacting. But don't worry I will know rather quick if she didn't like it, we are at a super small place right now where everyone knows everyone. If she didn't like it I will know when I go to a meeting for one of the clubs I'm a part of tomorrow. haha. I think that's part of the reason I was freaking out. Because if she doesn't like it, then I won't be able to sell anything here. I will have to wait until our next location which won't be until the beginning of next year. Even with that we are in a small "community" where everyone knows everyone so it would eventually get around state to state and even overseas. haha My friends did make me feel a little better yesterday though.

    The ones that helped transport the cakes for me told me I was crazy and that they thought they were gorgeous. One of my friends said she would have rather had the cake I made for her wedding than the cake she had. I just have a hard time trusting my friends that aren't my art friends. I know that sounds bad. But I am used to people being brutally honest with me when it comes to my work because they see what I see. I just notice every single detail. It's from 4 years of professors beating you down like you are in boot camp. hahaha

    Seriously though everything that could go wrong did go wrong haha. But as someone pointed out at least the cakes got there! This wasn't my first wedding cake but it definitely was the first cake that I had major issues with and I guess everyone needs to experience that one cake that will break you, to be able to move on. Plus my husband who is super supportive can also drive me up a wall and needs to learn when his "input" is appropriate.  

@-K8memphis  the crazy thing is, I have a whole section in my contract and consultation forms with reception time, drop off time, venue contact info, venue point of contact, etc. It apparently went over her head that the wedding and reception were in the same room. That's the only thing I can come up with. I have learned a lot from this bride though. So much that I have changed some things on my forms. I apparently just had super easy brides in the past and this one gave me a taste of what to really expect.

Thanks again everyone for your kind words! I just needed to "let it out." I was going to email the bride today about the dummy and tell her congrats. It's all I can do at this point.

With all the compliments you got, I am sure everyone loved your cake!! It sounds like everything that could go wrong did but you pulled through and delivered a beautiful cake!! It sounds like you are being too hard on yourself!! I bet the bride loved it!!