Tentative Wedding Date?

Business By MamaMia808 Updated 2 Aug 2011 , 8:11pm by MamaMia808

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MamaMia808 Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 8:30pm
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i recently participated in a wedding expo and got an email from a bride I met there. She is asking to order some cupcakes and a cake for this September. Then she says, "The challenge: We are getting married this September, but don't have a date and may not have a date until about 1-2 weeks before the actual date. What is your cancellation policy? Are you flexible if I give you a tentative date, however, it might be pushed one week later?"

I'm pretty new to the weding business so I wanted to know if this is common. I can't for the life of me figure out how that would work and how ANY vendor could pull this off. I have already responded that I don't feel comfortable commiting to her order since I might have to make everything twice if the wedding is pushed back a week. Appropriate?


8 replies
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luckylibra Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 8:58pm
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Are they military maybe? I could not set a firm date for my wedding due to the ship schedule for my fiancee as they were not firm on a date they were going to be back in port..He had a two week leave when he got back but we were not sure which two weeks.. good luck

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cai0311 Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 9:03pm
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The bride isn't booking her wedding cake and cupcakes, she is booking a spot on your calendar and you happen to be making a wedding cake and cupcakes for her. I don't understand how a bride can't know her date when it is only one month from the the wedding.

I personally wouldn't feel comfortable with this either. I think you made the right call.

Also, I have never heard of this before. I have had brides call saying "we are getting married sometime next year and are checking prices" but it is more for budget info than anything else.

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ranae5463 Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 9:07pm
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I agree with libra - could very well be military - being amilitary mom myself and have many military mom friends, many weddings are plannined for the very small amount of time they get for leave. I've seen many weddings get changed by a week or two with only a week's notice. Very possible it's military.

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Ashleyssweetdesigns Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 9:22pm
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Being in the military is one of the only reasons I could think of for her needing a tentative date. Otherwise you should not commit yourself to her. Have an open discussion with her about it to find out why her date is 100%. Then you can decide if it's right for you.

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bakingatthebeach Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 9:37pm
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This is what happened to me when I got married 20 years ago, our date changed 4 times in the month before planning. My sister in law who lived out of state kept calling after we set a date that they couldnt come because of this, so we changed it to a date she could do, and then she would call and say, no, son has a soccer tourney, etc, etc. After the 3rd time, I set a date and stuck to it (mainly because the hospital said I couldnt change my schedule request...again) so when she called and wanted me to change it, it wasnt happening, MIL mad stating I was going to have all my family there but my husband wouldnt have anyone. I told her I would change it but everyone would be there....except for me cause I would be at work! My roommate did my cake so that wasnt an issue.

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TexasSugar Posted 1 Aug 2011 , 9:44pm
post #7 of 9

Why not ask her, "Do you mind me asking why you don't have an exact date?"

If she replies back it's military, then you know she has a good reason why.

I have a friend on facebook that is waiting for her husband to come home. She knows when he will be in, but from my impression, they aren't allowed to tell people exactly when they are coming home. She's been very vague on her postings. Plus plans can always change.

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cai0311 Posted 2 Aug 2011 , 5:19pm
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With all due respect, I don't care why a bride (or anyone for any event) doesn't have a solid date. And why this bride doesn't have a solid date is not why the OP started the thread.

I only take on 1 to 2 orders per weekend (I want to have a life and I work full time). I may have an opening August 20 but not August 27. I personally won't take the order without a firm date because I may have to cancel the order due to availablility. If the client only gives me 1 week notice of the date change and I have to cancel because the new date is already booked, then they only have 1 week to find someone else. Not fair to the client either.

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MamaMia808 Posted 2 Aug 2011 , 8:11pm
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Thanks to everyone or your input!

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