Vent: My Family Expects Fablous Cakes For Nothing
Decorating By KMLRose Updated 20 Apr 2011 , 4:43am by cathyscakes
My cousin asked me to make her a birthday cake for 30 people for her sons birthday, then when I told her it would be $75 ($2.50 a serving) she asked if I could just make it for 15 people instead.
I have had the design finalized for over 3 weeks now and I now have to come up with something different to work with the price. Maybe I should just tell her to go to the grocery store and buy a run-of-the-mill cake if she's not willing to pay only $2.50 a serving.
Awwww ....... call me cranky but I'm thinking my response would be something like, "You betcha. I'll make it for $37.50 and only charge you an additional $37.50 for the design I created which won't be used." 
(Did I really just suggest that?) 
Actually, I was thinking of telling her I need the animals back that I hand molded out of clay since she isn't willing to pay the original price. Or would that be rude of me?
Actually, I was thinking of telling her I need the animals back that I hand molded out of clay since she isn't willing to pay the original price. Or would that be rude of me?
Well, I make my living with my art and my cakes so I tend to treat each business exactly like a business. In other words, if a cake client is dealing with a bakery downtown would they expect special concessions from them? No? Well, I am their chosen bakery and "out of my kitchen" doesn't mean my business less of a profession than the downtown one. I personally don't think it is rude to request to have something back which will not be used or paid for. On the other hand this is family and only you know what the response and consequences will be.
It will be interesting to see what others here have to say.
Actually, I was thinking of telling her I need the animals back that I hand molded out of clay since she isn't willing to pay the original price. Or would that be rude of me?
Well, I make my living with my art and my cakes so I tend to treat each business exactly like a business. In other words, if a cake client is dealing with a bakery downtown would they expect special concessions from them? No? Well, I am their chosen bakery and "out of my kitchen" doesn't mean my business less of a profession than the downtown one. I personally don't think it is rude to request to have something back which will not be used or paid for. On the other hand this is family and only you know what the response and consequences will be.
It will be interesting to see what others here have to say.
You're right. I don't understand why so many people are willing to cave in to familial guilt when the result would just be that they'll resent the entire thing. I also don't understand why you'd let family treat you so badly as to guilt you into doing something that you don't want to do, when you'd never let a stranger on the street do that to you.
Aren't we supposd to treat our families BETTER than a random stranger? That seems to be the tone of a lot of these "just do the cake for free" posts. If that's true, why is the "treating better" part limited to the baker doing something nice for the family emmber when the family member is obviously not concerned about taking advantage of the baker?
I think that people would be amazed to find out that some people will treat you just as badly as you let them treat you, regardless of whether they're family or not. When you start to stick up for youerself the users will be mad, but they'll back off after you stick to your guns. And if they don't and get mad at you, then they apparently don't think much about family sticking together, either.
I have a rule that the only ones that get free cakes from me are my grown children and my grandchildren. The rest get a 20% discount and if they don't like it too bad.
My oldest son and (the witch), trust me I'm being nice, decided to get married. They came over for dinner one day and she had the nerve to say to me. " We decided you don't have to buy us a wedding gift since your making our wedding cake for free."
I told her "Who said I was making it for free."
As Indy I am lucky with my family (at least the adults) when it comes to cost. For my nephews 10th birthday I made him a Steeler's helmet cake. It was a big hit and most of his friends didn't want to even cut it. My brother's mouth kinda hit the floor when he saw it too (made me chuckle a little to see). Then he turned to his son and explained to him how his cake was his present because of the time, money and love I put into it. I stepped back and looked around my brother and behind me etc. I got a puzzled looked from him so I told him I was looking for my real brother because there is no way it was him. I was shocked he actually got it without me having to tell him what I put into a cake. My family is so understanding it makes me proud of them when I read horror stories. Now when it comes to time frames of needing the cake they ask for the understanding goes out the window. lol Guess I'm lucky to get 1/2 of it.
Maybe it just depends on the family, I have 9 brother and sisters, 38 niece`s and nephue`s Im only a hobby baker, But if anyone in my family asked, There is`t anything i would`t do for them, There is allways one helping the other, Im not saying that everyone should do it.. But thats just us..Family is family
Maybe it just depends on the family, I have 9 brother and sisters, 38 niece`s and nephue`s Im only a hobby baker, But if anyone in my family asked, There is`t anything i would`t do for them, There is allways one helping the other, Im not saying that everyone should do it.. But thats just us..Family is family
Im with you here, family is family, I would never want to take a penny from anyone in my family, I would feel awful, its my family.
baking and crafting is something that I can do and why wouldn't I want to share my talent no charge with my family, they are not strangers.
I guess some other people feel different.
[quote="KMLRose"]I love the you don't have to buy us a gift. I've had that said to me and it drives me crazy. I would rather buy the gift and then get paid for the cake. The cake is more than likely going to cost me more in supplies than the gift is going to cost[/quote
Exactly! My siblings (6 of them) are famous for doing/saying this. I have 13 nieces and nephews. My siblings expect me to do cakes for their children every year as a gift. Um, ok but my gift (the cake) is usually worth at least $100. When my son's birthday rolls around, he's lucky if he even gets a card from them. I have recently vowed to stop doing free cakes for ANYONE except for my mom.
Maybe it just depends on the family, I have 9 brother and sisters, 38 niece`s and nephue`s Im only a hobby baker, But if anyone in my family asked, There is`t anything i would`t do for them, There is allways one helping the other, Im not saying that everyone should do it.. But thats just us..Family is family
I agree. Case in point: My mom called me yesterday mid day and asks me if I can do her a huge favor, "If I can I will". I never say yes to that question. Now this question comes while I'm at my full time job..."can you make a cake for tomorrow for your nephew?" As much as I wanted to say no because I work all day I said sure, what flavor? So I get home, cook dinner, clean up, visit with new neighbors, bake cake, let cool, take a shower and then decorate it. So yea, family is important and I do for them. I'm just thankful they know what I go through and she wasn't expecting a fondant covered cake with little gumpaste accessories. She knew she was getting a buttercream covered cake with buttercream decorations. And then I almost left that darn cake at the house when I left to delivered it before going to work. lol
Ahh, suesweet, your family sounds like mine! I do love to make all my nieces and nephews cakes as well( I have 6 nephews and 5 nieces, plus my 3 kiddos!) it is allways my gift to them. But like your family, my kiddos never get gifts from them! But they all come over and have dinner and a fabulous cake! My kiddos never complain, they are always greateful for their company, so I guess I shouldnt complain either!
I have a very large family, and I'm really lucky that they have no problem pitching in for cakes. I do this as a hobby as well, and want to get as much practice in if I want to do this as a business in a few years. But it is really expensive to give away free cakes constantly. So I will either keep my receipt and give it to my relatives, or give them the shopping list and let them get the ingredients. I always have everything in hand 2 weeks before the cake is due, and it's been working great. Maybe I'm just lucky, but this has worked very well!
I am very lucky when it comes to family. They have never asked for special cakes, ever. I am the one that offers for a birthday or wedding... And this is both sides of the family. I have said repeatedly that if I am able to bring a cake to the wedding then that is their wedding present. And I did drive across the state with a baked cake and the frosting ingredients, and gumpaste flower swags carefully packaged, in the back of my van for my SIL's wedding. It turned out gorgeous, and a year later she still brings up how awesome that was that I did all that work for her. (She also let me know that they ate the top tier on their anniversary, and it was still just as yummy!)
But I'm still a hobby baker, not running a business that depends on the money a cake brings in. My aunt asked me to do a cake for my cousins birthday, and the last line of the email was letting me know she was more than willing to pay and what would I charge her for the cake. So I told her. $30 for design A, or $40 for design B because of the modeling chocolate. She's my favorite aunt, and is therefore getting a family discount but doesn't know it. 
I usually don't mind making cakes for friends and family, but its getting expensive. I would like it if my family would offer to buy ingredients, or at least take me out to lunch as a thank-you. They do get use to me always have done it in the past kind of thing. I know its my fault, they do appreciate me doing the cakes, and always really compliment my efforts, so it is usually o.k. with me. I guess I'm just tired this week and got a call for a cake for this weekends birthday today, so wasn't too thrilled. I think what bothers me the most is I always made cakes for my kids when they were growing up, even if it was the character pan and a star tip, but people won't even try, you would think it would mean more to make your kids birthday cake, even if its the sugar decorations from the grocery store. The cake is just for a family birthday party, and my sister does bake, so you would think she could make a birthday cake for her grandson. I think she is too lazy. lol.
I told her it won't be much of a cake, and she was fine with that, so i'm thinking why don't you make it, but do I say it, no. Oh well, its my fault, and like I said I don't usually mind, its just happening too much lately.
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