You dont need to give her a reason, NO means NO!
That's exactly right. For heavens sake, only four-year-olds persist with "WHY?" when they've been told no. If she persists you just need to be a broken record and say, "No, I can't make a cake for you." " But why not?" Because I can't. And this conversation is closed." Period. No explanation. Your reasons are simply none of her business.
Geez, what nerve.
I had a student that didn't come to school when the rest of the class had a party for MY birthday, but, she did get me an anniversary gift. So, in HER case it was No to birthdays and Yes to anniversaries. However, she was a dear person and would NEVER ask for a free cake!
Beth in KY
Better yet If she asks why. Tell her cause you said so. And respond w/so stop asking me!
Tell her you are on a "free cake freeze" due to the economy.
I like this...I think I am gonna use it from now on! I gave away like $100 in free cake this weekend because I can't keep my trap shut and offer cakes when I really don't need to. I don't mind doing cakes as gifts and for family, but if I am not even invited tothe event...why am I giving it away???
Tell her you are on a "free cake freeze" due to the economy.
I like this...I think I am gonna use it from now on! I gave away like $100 in free cake this weekend because I can't keep my trap shut and offer cakes when I really don't need to. I don't mind doing cakes as gifts and for family, but if I am not even invited tothe event...why am I giving it away???
OMG! They didn't even invite you. I at least got invited. Yeah! We all need to get together and start a cake therapy club
We could call it just say no!
OP that you for all that you do so we have the freedom to do what we want. Without the spouse support the millitary is almost useless. It takes a lot for our troops and our families. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Indydebi I have a solution for the economic crunch this country is facing. We need to stimulate the economy. We need people to buy things. We need to get you to answer and tell it like it is for a doll. Then when the dumba$$ show up and we are left speachless we get our "lil deb" doll and pull a string, push a button or whatever and let your wisdom flow. You can improve our economy. Oh, wait, I am sure you will just give them away free to all us! NOT
Unfortunately, I had a similar conversation with a casual friend the other day. Last month I took a chocolate Guinness cake to my Bunco group. Anyway, she asked what I'd charge for a purse cake for Mother's day. When I told her, she said, "Gee, that's a lot for a cake...could you do something similar for less?" I gave her my per slice price and she said, "Oh, I don't know..." so I told her I could just give her the recipe if she wanted it, and she said, "Oh, no. That'd be a disaster." So I replied, "Well, what I do is custom cakes." and she dropped it.
This is where I wish I had Debi's quickness and nerve because what I wish I'd said was, "Well, you're a real estate agent and I'm getting ready to sell my house. I think a 6% commission is an awful lot, so will you just do it for me for 1%?" I just wonder how she would have responded to that comparison.
I also felt like telling her if baking it herself would be a disaster, and she needs to hire it done, then she's going to have to pay a premium price for that just like anything else. I just paid a bunch of money to have my house painted. Sure I could have done it cheaper (except for the visit to the ER after throwing myself off a ladder...) but I didn't want to. It was well worth every penny of it to have it done by a pro. Same with me, lady!!
Tell her you are on a "free cake freeze" due to the economy.
I like this...I think I am gonna use it from now on! I gave away like $100 in free cake this weekend because I can't keep my trap shut and offer cakes when I really don't need to. I don't mind doing cakes as gifts and for family, but if I am not even invited tothe event...why am I giving it away???
You too Merissa? I made a baby shower cake today (REALLY didn't want to, but said I would in a moment of weakness) and guess what? I'm not invited to the baby shower! Here's a kicker....it's at my church and it is my HUSBANDS extended family! Oh well, think I'll treat myself to a date with ME somewhere quiet.....for a CHANGE! LOL
Beth in KY
Tell her you are on a "free cake freeze" due to the economy.
I like this...I think I am gonna use it from now on! I gave away like $100 in free cake this weekend because I can't keep my trap shut and offer cakes when I really don't need to. I don't mind doing cakes as gifts and for family, but if I am not even invited tothe event...why am I giving it away???
OMG! They didn't even invite you. I at least got invited. Yeah! We all need to get together and start a cake therapy club
We could call it just say no!
Well this time might not have been a good example of not being invited (though it has happened before!) I actually offered the next cake free because we borrowed something from them. Pretty good deal for them really! So then when she ordered the cake, she said I shouldnt have said anything because she didn't recall me saying that. But I insisted, I like to be a woman of my word I don't know if we would have been invited or not, but it was the same day as DH birthday, so we had plans anyway. Plus it was for a first communion, so I wouldnt have expected to be invited to such an occasion. But still I have given away a few birthday cakes and not been invited. Not that I EXPECTED to be, but still I feel like when a friend orders a cake and one time a long time ago they gave me some $5 thing, that I somehow owe them a free cake! Seriously, I do need therapy. sorry I hijacked. "Just say no" sounds like a great group. Seriously, we should start a club in the the "lounge forum" Maybe we could all grow some cake balls. Or maybe that is what we could call it "cake balls." Yeah. "cake balls."
Tell her you are on a "free cake freeze" due to the economy.
I like this...I think I am gonna use it from now on! I gave away like $100 in free cake this weekend because I can't keep my trap shut and offer cakes when I really don't need to. I don't mind doing cakes as gifts and for family, but if I am not even invited tothe event...why am I giving it away???
You too Merissa? I made a baby shower cake today (REALLY didn't want to, but said I would in a moment of weakness) and guess what? I'm not invited to the baby shower! Here's a kicker....it's at my church and it is my HUSBANDS extended family! Oh well, think I'll treat myself to a date with ME somewhere quiet.....for a CHANGE! LOL
Beth in KY
What?!?! yeah, that is bad. really bad. You do deserve a date with yourself.
We're all a bunch of saps....but I think I'm the queen today! A dear friend called me a week and a half ago for a cake for her 6 year old nephew for yesterday. He wanted a monster truck....Grave Digger of all things. Now, I told her I couldn't. I had an ear/sinus infection, testing at school all week and 3 cakes to make and decorate to donate to our Memorial Trivia Night. It was a very full week!
She begs.....I say the only way I can POSSIBLY do it is if I make the truck out of RTK so I could make it the weekend before, and then a simple sheet cake. Plus she has to pay for me to buy the black fondant, and all the ingredients. Next phone call is could it be a 2 layer 11 x 15 sheet cake? Sure...whatever.
So, dummy me, start on this truck. I mean, he's six.....I want it to be really cool. I spent 8 flippin hours on the truck and it's pretty awesome. My fault... I know! I carve out the sheet cakes and cover them in "sand" and make the truck look like it's jumping. The ingredients come to about $70 after paying premium for the fondant at the only cake decorating store here. She picks up the cake and CRIES because she's so happy with it. Asks me how much it would cost if I was charging, and I tell her at least $200. I'm promised "some extra" because she knows I spent so many hours on it, all as a favor for her sister and nephew.
Today I get a check....for $100. Wow....$30 for about 11 hours of work. Gawd......and, all my own fault. I know it....no one has to say it! When am I going to learn?
Jodie
It is one of the shortest words in the english language..(probably the first word we learn) LOL... and yet it seems to be the one word NO ONE fully understands! I too had a customer try to plead and beg her way into me making a cake for her for next weekend. When I stood my ground and told her in no uncertain terms.. I am FULLY BOOKED, she got rather insulted and practically hung up on me. Oh well.. I will not allow myself to get stressed out by overbooking anymore.
"I'm sorry, it's just not possible for me to do that"
Any whining about "why not?" or whatever get the response "Because it just isn't possible. I'm sorry."
The. End.
Yes I believe we all do need help. My husbands cousin wanted me to make a cake for her granddaughters first bday. I said no, I'm working six days a week right now, I only have sunday off and the party is sat. She asks, " well when do you get off". I'm usually home by 2:00, oh the party won't start til 3. Ok, I'll decorate friday night and just go over when I get home. Then they want a wonder pets cake, have to carve the boat. So last week I get all the cakes baked, frozen, and buttercream made, only thing not done is the fondant. The party is next weekend. I get the invitation in the mail sat. and the party starts at 1:00. I call her and say, hey remember I won't even be home yet? Tell her I baked the cakes and everything already."Oh, I forgot! Oh well, guess will just have to do something else for the cake" No sorry for you trouble, nothing. I didn't even want to make the cake! Maybe something cute and girlie, at least it would have been fun. But the 1 year old has a favorite cartoon! Good luck finding someone else to do that.
You know when my husband left for Iraq someone asked me to do a cake for free as well. They thought "it would take your mind off of the fact that your husband isn't home, you might not miss him if you're really busy making my cake". I told her that I thought I could find enough to do to fill up my day without making her a free cake.
I know it's a difficult time for you and moving doesn't make it any better. I hope that your move goes well and that everything arrives intact and that everything you own shows up.
God Bless, from another military wife and will keep you all in my prayers.
It can be hard to say no without guilt but, if you are trying to make some money out of it how are you ever going to make $$$$ if you keep giving away your stuff, people will more than likely be less inclined to pay for your services after they have been getting them for free!!!
A friend of mine asked me to make her a cake for her son's 4th birthday, a pirate ship, automatic reaction, sure of course i will. She did say she would pay for the ingredients.
Well, after thinking about it for some time i thought hang on, this is probably going to take me a whole day maybe 2, making everything from scratch, started feeling resentful, then i started whinging to my husband, and i asked him as we are invited to the party could the cake be our present to the 4yo? If we paid for the ingredients or if she paid for them, i am giving up alot of my time it, isn't just a sheet cake with some icing.
He didn't think so but i did, what do you guys think?
DONT FORGET BARTERING!!!
i must say that i am very happy with the arrangement that i came up with and that was that i would make her son's cake free of charge and her partner (a qualified electrician) would install the power points that i have had sitting there for for the last 2 years. Now i am thinking should she pay for the ingredients for the cake since i have already bought the materials for the electrical work ??? hmmm??
I love how non-military wives (or people in general) tell us what we need to do to "take our minds off of" our spouses not being here...
I always like to ask them, "When's the last time your wife or husband was in a foreign country fighting a war, how did you get to be the subject matter expert on how to pass the time while your spouse is in a combat zone?"
Keep your chins up ladies, you have plenty of sisters and brothers who are praying for your spouses safe returns because we were once there (or are there) ourselves.
I would just simply say "I am sorry, but I am unable to do a cake for you right now"
I would not give her an excuse. It seems to me that she doesnt mind making you squirm. You giving an excuse is just her seeing you squirm some more.
It will take a HUGE weight off your shoulders if you just say no WITHOUT an excuse. It took me a while to ask for the proper price for my cakes. i Always felt guilty for charging so much for "cake" then I realized that it is not just "cake" I am charging for. When I finally said no to people and quoted a proper price, it was a huge relief for me.
She said no she didn't have the funds for it. (Like I've got money laying around the damn house)
Her: "No, I can't do that ... I dont' have the funds for it."
Me: "Oh let me help you out, then. I'll just turn around and bend over to make it easier for you to pull the dollar bills out of my a$$! Because that's where I keep all of my extra money!"
Dumba$$es.
HA HA HA HA HA!
I love how non-military wives (or people in general) tell us what we need to do to "take our minds off of" our spouses not being here...
I always like to ask them, "When's the last time your wife or husband was in a foreign country fighting a war, how did you get to be the subject matter expert on how to pass the time while your spouse is in a combat zone?"
Keep your chins up ladies, you have plenty of sisters and brothers who are praying for your spouses safe returns because we were once there (or are there) ourselves.
I have had a lady tell me that my husband "left" me when he went to Iraq! Needless to say, I told her how the cow ate cabbage in no uncertain terms!
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