So this may seem a little long but I need to vent before I hurt this man. So my husband and I bake every thrusday and friday and he has been helping be bc I'm on bedrest. Now this morning he wakes me up and says what do we need from the store because I'm making a list. I told him what I remembered and he left. Now he comes back and says that he only got one dozen of eggs. I say we have 4 already but are short a few eggs so he says he has to go back to the store for that and I told him to grab some brown sugar and a bar of german's chocolate. So he comes back no eggs but has brown sugar and chocolate. So he says dont worry I will go back. So I start mixing and realize we dont have enough baking soda also.

So I add the baking soda to the list along with another bar of chocolate. Now he leaves and calls me and ask what kind of chocolate and I tell him. Then he calls again but the phone fell between the couch and I couldnt reach it because I'm five months pregnant and cant get under the couch. So he gets back and says "I wanted to buy baking soda but couldnt find the container that we already have". So I say honey I brought that plastic container in NYC and I cant find it up here. I've been saving it and just refilling it to keep it fresher longer." I then said "You brought the last baking soda and saw me refill it and spill all over the counter" He then gets mad at me and starts yelling and telling me that I had the attitude of "Like DUH" Like he should have known. I said you should have known because I told you and you just forgot. It's no big deal you just forgot but dont yell at me and blame me for you forgetting. He was so mad and just stomped off and told me I just dont get it and I'm reflecting. I dont get what the heck he is talking about. I just got so mad and started crying because I know that this is not my fault. I told him that he is upset over something else and dont blame me. He told me why dont I ask him what is wrong instead of deflecting. So I say "Well what is wrong? Why are you so upset" He then says forget it because he shouldnt have to point me in the right direction and make me care about why he is upset. What?

I dont get it and I'm really pissed now. I told him just because he is in a bad mood it doesnt mean that he should make me angry so I can be mad with him. I'm telling you I've had enough. I think right now that he is acting like a jerk and an idiot. I'm going to go to the store myself so I can just leave him!!! Is it just me or has he lost it? Are other husbands this stupid? I just feel like crying and dont know what to do.

Don't we all want to kill our husbands at some point every day? Every home improvement project that we have goes tragically wrong, and costs us mega money to fix. Most recently, dh was replacing our broken front door knob, and drilled a hole in the wrong spot, ruined the door, and it's going to cost us like $1200 to fix it.

Hang in there, honey. STILL on bedrest? How much longer?

Sounds like my husband. HE screws up, then gets mad at me. I think they get embarrassed when they do something stupid and you know about it, so they get mad and take it out on us because they are embarrassed. Men are just big babies with ridiculously fragile egos.

Hopefully I won't be on bed rest much longer. I really am just ignoring him right now. I dont feel like being bothered with him.

You all know that men get PMS too right? They just refuse to admit it, so they blame their moodiness on us. I only wish they'd get the period part too..........that would fix 'em! Can you just imagine them trying to get a tampon up their wienies?!

Karema sweetie, IT"S HIM NOT YOU!! Take care of yourself and that baby.

Well he finally apologized. He said that he was frustrated with the kids when he took them shopping because they ran around the store screaming and were horrible in the car. He also said that he was frustrated that he couldnt find the baking soda. I accepted his apology and told him that if he is having a moment he needs to tell me. Throw up a white flag or something and let me know he needs a moment away from the kids. He said ok he will. So for now that's over.

Thank you ladies for making me feel better. I really did lol when I read about them sticking tampons up their weinies. I then thought they should have to have childbirth as well and be pregnant for at least one child. That would really fix them.

I have been married for 23 years . I learned a long time ago If I want something done and done right to do it myself. I don't even ask anymore.

He will surprise me every once in a while and do something that doesn't piss me off, but not often. haha For the most part I just let him go to work and bring in the $$$ and I do everything else. That way there is not much to argue about.

We all get like this with our DH at some point. And I am sure being pregnant isn't helping! Don't worry, this will will get better.

Always so nice to hear that I am not the only one in this boat.

My guess would be that maybe your tone was amused or frustrated when you spoke to him, and to him it sounded mocking or scolding. Or maybe your tone WAS neutral, but as someone said, he was embarrassed about being such a fool.

I live on a farm. One day, my husband said he was going to take the garbage to the dumpster (we didn't have one in our yard at the time, so he had to go about 3 miles to use the county one). He was gone for FIVE HOURS! The other thing he does is he will go and help our neighbour. He will tell him how long he will be -- say 45 minutes. He is ALWAYS at least twice as long. I don't care, but eventually I will start to think, well, what if there was an accident and he is lying injured in the field, so I will eventually cave and call him. He will answer the phone and say, "Oh, I'm done now, I'll be home in 5 minutes", as if he has just that minute finished whatever task. In the background, I can hear the neighbours kids and the conversation, so I KNOW that he is sitting at their kitchen table visiting. Good grief.

My favorite funny hubby thing is when they are going to fix something or build something, and they give you their "estimate" of what it's going to cost you. After 14 years of marriage, I automatically multiply whatever bargain price he gives me by three.


Sorry Kareema, didn't mean to make it about me! I guess since we've all got 'em, we all need to vent about 'em once in a while!

Your hubby should totally know by now not to mess with a preggo mamma!!

My husband goes somewhere and takes hours to come back as well. One day he had to go to work and he had been thinking about quitting for a while because he was misarble. Well he gets ready to leave the house and tells me he is stopping by his sisters to ask her if she is coming over our house because she doesnt have a phone.

Well he leaves and around 2 hours later his job calls looking for him. I say he left at 7:30 am and should be there. Well at 10:30 they were still looking for him. I was so worried. I called the police station to see if there were any accidents. I called the hospitals. I called his mother. I called everyone I could think of.

Well in He walks at around 11:00 like hi honey. I went off on him thinking something happened to him. He just looks at me and says "Well shouldnt you give me a hug since you were so worried and I'm ok?" That man almost died that day!

My husband is the one who, when I asked if he could vac the stairs after I cleaned the basement, 4 bathrooms, all the bedrooms, and polished the furniture, gets the leaf blower instead! Scared the hell out of our golden retriever (blew her, too, which was an explosion of hair) and blew the dust/dirt/hair all through the house, and the exhaust filled up the house with a rank smell and also set off our smoke detectors.

Debi's husband said he was a dumba$$, too!

Karema,

It's got to be tough to be on bedrest. I can't imagine what it must be like. I never had any problems with my pregnancies. Please keep in mind that what I'm replying to is based on just what you wrote. Obviously I don't know the whole dynamic of your marriage.

Is it possible that being on bedrest and having to bake is just a little stressful? Is it possible that when you talk to dh it doesn't come out in the nicest manner? From your message I heard you have a dh who is willing to help you bake, go shopping (and take the kids, HUGE kudos for that) and then go back 2-3 times when he screws up. And maybe, just maybe he gets upset when it seems like you're criticizing him? Sure, he shouldn't have yelled and had his little hissy fit, but I honestly think that he wasn't the only one needing to apologize!

Have you told him recently how much you appreciate his help and his willingness to do these things? A little compliment can go a long way. So can a little humility.

Have you told him recently how much you appreciate his help and his willingness to do these things? A little compliment can go a long way. So can a little humility.[/quote]

So I should thank him for what I have to do everyday? Not that I dont appreciate what he does and I often tell him thank you, but I've never gotten why we as women should pat them on the head everytime they go to the store to buy stuff for the house they live in or take care of the kids that they help created.

I always appreciate what my husband does but he also takes for granted that I do this all the time and wonders why I'm so tired when I'm at home because like he says "You get to sit and relax when you are at home." I've been a stay at home mom for 5 years and my husband rarely wants to lift a finger. He hates dishes, laundry, sweeping vacuuming cleaning the bathroom or making dinner. I've been running around after that man for years and cleaning up his clothes off the floor and cleaning the toilet when he doesnt think to do so.

I also have cooked dinner almost everynight and do the laundry. I did all of this while doing a business to make extra money for the family when we both started this business and he decided he didnt feel like doing it anymore. So I got to be on bedrest for a month and he gets all pissy? While on bedrest I still baked because he lost his job and I have to support the family. So should he help? You bet he should! He should help with everything that is needed to be done without a complaint because like he said "He is at home everyday and he does get to relax." Right?

Now all that being said, I love my husband and I'm glad that we are doing this business together. I'm proud of him that he has finally stepped up to the plate and started helping out alot more. Was I annoyed that day we got into the argument? NO! I found it hilarious and was saying it jokingly. He didnt like the fact that I found it funny but it was funny. It wasnt any thing to get upset about. So he forgot that I brought the container in NYC, so what? My husband is the one that always asked me "why cant you go to the store with the kids while I'm not here? It's not that hard for you to get things done just put them in the car" I wish he would take his own advice.

Now I graciously step off my soap box! LOL

debi and karema, you two just made my day with those last two posts

Yes, we should pat them on the back. And YES, they should be kissing the ground we walk on! My point is that it's a two way street. I have four kids and I'm a stay at home mom and I've had my own business. Guess what? I'm a little familiar with things. You know what else? I've got a dh who is sometimes clueless and doesn't always get what it is to be me! You know what else? I don't always stop to think what it is to be him. What it is for him to be the sole or main source of money or the stress that can cause. See the two way street? I'm not saying pat him on the back and walk away. I'm saying pat him on the back while you're asking for a back rub.

In the past, I got pissed enough at dh and how he didn't get me that I walked out the door and stayed at a hotel for a couple days. So, he got my message pretty quick, but honestly my message was not delivered in the best manner. Right now I've got a dh who doesn't get home from work and think his job is done. He helps with chores, helps with the kids, and I can leave the house for a day or more and not be afraid of what I'll find when I get home. Does he still sometimes treat me like I have it easy. You bet. Do I still sometimes treat him like he has it easy? Absol-freakin-lutely. I still think we mothers have the hardest jobs on earth.

I just think that we need to give what we also want to receive. And sometimes we need to ask for what we want to receive on order to get it.

Koolaidstains I do agree that we both should care about each other. It sounds to me that our situation is a little different right now. When my husband did work I use to tell him how great he was. Now that he is not working I still tell him how great he is. My point is that we both have our roles and it pisses me off when he makes light of what I do then when he has to do it his whole world ends. If the thinks it's easy to take the kids out then why should he get upset when he takes them out. Do you know how many times I've gone grocery shopping with my kids then come home and make dinner, clean up afterwards and then put them to bed? Hundreds of times. He should understand that just because he has to keep going to the store for his mistakes doesnt give him the right to be pissy about it. Brush it off and keep on going. I know for a fact that I dont take him for granted and that is why we have a strong marriage. Does he get on my nerve sometimes yes! That was the point of my op. He did something that irked me and I wanted a friend or two to console me. The point is that he snapped at me and ruined my day by yelling and going off on me for no reason that had anything to do with me.