Finally Got A Backbone!!!! (Super Long Vent)

Decorating By summernoelle Updated 2 Jun 2009 , 12:55am by sarahcupcake

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summernoelle Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:37pm
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I am sure some of you will have your jaws drop open by what I just said to a client, but I tell you what, it felt awesome. Also, this wedding has solidified my decision to not do weddings anymore. For some reason, people think this gives them license to treat others terribly.
So today I made the wedding cake for the lady who gave me all the problems with the gluten free cake. Everyone kind of thought she was more trouble than she was worth, but I did the order anyway. Also, to summarize, I never met them in person. This was all over the phone and email-no tastings, etc.
I show up at the reception hall and there was a woman there screaming on the phone. They are mad about the flowers, and are being extremely abusive. I kind of bristle, put the bottom tier of my cake down, and go back to get the next layer. When I come back, she is now screaming at someone in the room, who had just put up some pretty gauze around the room with twinkle lights. It was beautiful, just gorgeous, but they were telling him it looked horrible, that he had done a terrible job, that he needed to fix it NOW. The man was pretty flabbergasted, and was trying hard to make her happy.
I get to work on my cake, and they make their rounds over to me. They are angry about the color. In my defense, they told me they wanted "red". That was it, just red. She never sent a swatch. So, I dyed my fondant Super Red, and then dusted it with Super Pearl to make it look like ribbon. It cut the brightness from it, but was still red. The color of the flowers was a dark, deep, almost black red. But like I said, they hadn't told me this or sent a swatch.
The grandma of the Bride was there, and started screaming at me. Telling me it wasn't red, and I told her I had dyed the fondant red, but it just wasn't super bright because I dusted it with shimmer powder. She was furious, told me the whole cake looked like crap, that it was ridiculous. She then started going to other people in the room saying "She didn't order a cake to look like this!" and "What color is this?" Someone remarked that it matched the color of one of the flowers in the arrangements, and she said "Well, I guess that is the only positive thing about it."
She was standing next to my table while I was working, and continued to bring people in, show them the cake, and tell them it was hideous. icon_sad.gif It was ugly, I did a terrible job, I was a HORRIBLE decorator.
Finally, I can't believe I said this, but I put my piping back down and said
"Do you even want this cake?"
And she stared at me and I said "Because if you are so unhappy with it, maybe I should just take it with me."
She said "Well what are we supposed to do?"
I said "You can go down the street and pick one up at Albertson's. You guys didn't give me a fabric swatch to match, you just said red. And this is red. I'm not a mind reader, and the way you are speaking to me is very disrespectful."
She paused for a minute, and then said "No, we want it."
So I said "Well, you need to leave me alone then and let me do my work. Otherwise I will be taking this cake with me, and I will send you a refund minus the deposit."
Hmph! After that, the guy who was hanging the gauze told the grandma she had to leave, because we were working hard and she was distracting. She didn't leave, but did come up to me and compliment me on my armadillo.
When I was leaving, the man with the gauze was waiting outside for me, and told me this woman had been a nightmare from day one. He said he had never been treated so badly EVER, and patted me on the back for telling her to back off.
I hope this didn't get me into more trouble, but I tell you what, it felt awesome!!!
Here are the two pics. The red is a little off in the photo, but I promise it WAS red (DH vouched for it when we saw it, and even commented on the red bows. The white fondant here in the pic even looks yellow). And also my adorable armadillo. icon_biggrin.gif

114 replies
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mixinvixen Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:46pm
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you can only bite your tongue so much before you end up with permanent damage!!! i think you took things much longer than i would have, and it sounds to me, by your retelling, that even when you let if fly, you remained firm but still respectful.



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4kids Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:50pm
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I for one am proud of you. To me, you sounded very professional and respectful while at the same time insisting that she stop.

Your cake is beautiful, and I am sure... red!! I would love to see what she could have gotten at Albertson's that would look anywhere near as good. Some people........

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-K8memphis Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:53pm
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I am sincerely button busting poud of you.

(That poor woman is a miserable soul isn't she.)

You did great.

You for sure not doing weddings anymore?

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-K8memphis Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:55pm
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And the cake is as beautiful as the armadillo is cute.

I mean how many decorators can cute-ify an armadillo??!!

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wasabi106 Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:56pm
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I think it soundslike you handled yourself VERY well. Some people are only happy when they are making others feel bad, and it sounds like in a way you stood up to her for everyone she was abusing. Your cake was beautiful & red, smf the armadillo was A-D-O-R-A-B-L-E!!!!!

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sweet_teeth Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:57pm
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First off, it's beautiful.

Secondly, I do not think you were rude at all, and handled yourself very well.

Congrats on the backbone.. I know it can be hard! Annnnnd... all your work is beautiful so don't let her snarky comments get to you icon_smile.gif

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Bijoudelanuit Posted 31 Jan 2009 , 11:58pm
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Your cake is stunning! I'm so sorry for the verbal abuse this woman put you through! (And so proud that you stood up to her!) Great job on all the above!

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jdconcc Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:02am
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Your cake is beautiful and definitely red, DO NOT let some miserable woman stop you from creating your works of art. If we give her the benefit of the doubt and think that maybe she was stressed out beyond endurance by the magnitude of the day (I'm being very generous just to make a point) how bad will she feel now to think that not only has she spoiled her memory of what should have been a perfect day but also to have insulted a REALLY TALENTED person by personally attacking her work... well if I was her I'd feel really, really small by now and want to hide in a hole. YOu on the other hand should not give up, you cake is gorgeous, be proud of it and rise above. (on the other hand if she's always that miserable, lets just pity her and then you can be proud and rise above it!)

Sorry that really upset me that someone could be so cruel, I know how excited I get before a delivery and that kind of response would be crushing. Am sending you big hugs xxx

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luv_to_decorate Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:05am
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Your cake is very beautiful. You still treated her with a lot more respect than she showed you. I don't think I could have let her talk to me and been as nice as you were when you told her to back off. I think I would have been taking my cake back with me. If you had started packing it back up, I bet she would have been begging you to come back. Don't you know how miserable that whole wedding was? What a way to start a wedding! icon_rolleyes.gif

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4kids Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:05am
post #11 of 115

I wonder... was it the bride who was doing all the screaming or just her grandma? I would pretty irked if someone was screaming at the vendors at my wedding...unles she was participating in the screaming.

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indydebi Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:08am
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I also agree that you handled yourself firmly and professionally.

Just because you've paid for my time and my cake, doens't mean I've prostituted myself to have to take anything and everything that you want to dish out.

On behalf of all cakers everywhere, I applaud you!!

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jsclar03 Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:14am
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Your cake is beautiful and it sounds like you respectfully told her to back off...good for you!

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grama_j Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:16am
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Everything Indydebi said......... thumbs_up.gif

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jammjenks Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:22am
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Add me to your cheering section! I hope you don't swear off weddings altogether. 99% of them are not like this.

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stephaniescakenj Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:24am
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so after the fact, this story is hysterical!!!! certainly not so while it was transpiring but I would not have been able to hold my composure for more than a minute! Your cakes came out great!
I remember the original thread and it sounds like this was a headache all the way. Let's just hope she doesn't come back and insist on refunds or start bad mouthing you. Keep an eye out for any bashing just in case...

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Carson Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:25am
post #17 of 115

The cake is awesome, I'm glad you didn't let her talk to you like that!!! I only wish I would do the same (but thankfully never had to!) If this does happen to mean I will know exactly what to say!

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snowynight Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:29am
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I don't think I could have been as respectful as you were. My hat is off to you for that. Your cake is beautiful and your armadillo is so cute. Keep creating your beautiful, beautiful creations and don't let these miserable people get you down.
Hold your cake banner high!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Rocketgirl899 Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:31am
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way to stand up for yourself.

I think you did it in a great manner.

Next time.. set up a video to record you setting u p the wedding cake.. then put it on youtube so we can all get out the popcorn!

Uhh. It wasn't your cake (it was awesome) she was complaining about everything but I am so glad you had the balls to do this.

I wanna do wedding cakes eventually.. but can i put a sign on the door.. no bridezillas? lol. that is the only thing i dread. that, and mothers getting cakes for their first child's b-day.... scares the crap outta me!

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mkolmar Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:32am
post #20 of 115

I wish I new how to do one of those clapping emoticons for you. I'd have a whole football field posted on here. Way to go and stand up for yourself.
Your cake is absolutely lovely.

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m1m Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:32am
post #21 of 115

You go girl!

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summernoelle Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:34am
post #22 of 115

Wow, thank you guys so much! I knew coming here would make me feel better. But telling her off felt great, phew! Now hopefully she won't ask for her money back on Monday.

Also-the bride's mom and grandma were the ones there. The Bride was at the church.

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eldag0615 Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:35am
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Congrats! Everything Indy said plus your cakes are BEAUTIFUL.

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lanibird Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:40am
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You handled yourself perfectly! If it'd been me, I'd of just shoved her head in the cake. icon_lol.gif

I agree with what Indy said. They paid you for a cake, not for their own personal abuse taker.


Edited to add: Beautiful wedding cake, and I'm lovin' that armadillo!

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Idreamofcakes Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:43am
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Summer I always love your posts. I have never seen you disrespect anyone! I am very proud of you and ditto what everybody else said.
I think you handled yourelf very well, I don't think I would have put the piping bag down. I would have a given her a closer look at how red it was and decorated her face for her icon_surprised.gif Some people just don't know how to be happy, and think everyone else should be aas miserable as them. Your cakes are gorgeous as usual, keep caken honey, your gifted.
Did I just type that?? Oh i'm sooo sorry...NOT! Now you all know why i'm not in business icon_razz.gif

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summernoelle Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:45am
post #26 of 115
Originally Posted by Rocketgirl899

Next time.. set up a video to record you setting u p the wedding cake.. then put it on youtube so we can all get out the popcorn!

I just read this. Funny! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

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Jenn2179 Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:55am
post #27 of 115

Well my hat is off to you and I hope that this old mean witch does not stop you from making wedding cakes for other brides. They will be missing out on a beautiful wedding cake and should all give this woman a beat down for stopping you from doing wedding cakes.

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Teekakes Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 12:57am
post #28 of 115

The meaning of "Class"-----------Informal; Elegance of style, taste, and manner, excellent, skilful, or stylish, SUMMERNOELLE

You were a class act in how you conducted yourself with this rude lady. Hats off to you for not lowering yourself to her level! You rose above her rude and nasty remarks in a very tasteful manor and I am very proud of you!!! thumbs_up.gif

Your cakes are beautiful and my monitor shows the red bows very well......they are red. The yellow color of the cake is an obvious lighting issue and not the color of the cake.
The armadillo.......I LOVE THAT ARMADILLO.............It is the cutest animal cake I have ever seen!! icon_biggrin.gif

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summernoelle Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 1:00am
post #29 of 115

Teekakes, seriously, one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. icon_smile.gif

Mostly I am weary of wedding cakes because so many Brides have that princess thing is exhausting. And SO stressful. And yucky tasting. There is just something easier about party cakes!

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tonicake Posted 1 Feb 2009 , 1:02am
post #30 of 115

I hope when I grow up, I can be just like you! I seem to let people treat me like poop! (I try not too!) It drives me nuts! I just want every one to be happy. I'm so proud of you and thank you for setting such a great example!

Your tiered cake is beautiful and I absolutely love the armadillo!

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