ROFLMAS!! Doug you are too funny!! Your donderhead name was the best. I don't remember the last time I have heard that name. That totally made my evening since it has been an insane one at that.

Thanks again Doug for the chuckle!! And for all you great ideas!! I know that I would not want to be on your naughty list that is for sure!!

I just wanna post to say I love this site. I have had such good luck with questions and people anwering them. I have only been on one "steamy" post, and guess what I did this morning? hit the stop watching this for new posts button. I feel much better now! I must be real emotional today because this whole post makes me a little teary ! Thanks to all out there who have been helpful, because that's what makes me love this site. And thank goodness the bugs are worked out because I go insane when I can't cruise the site for new info.
by the way I am also a "lurker" because I spend all my free time on this site, when my husband is walking in I quick X out because he thinks this is all I do

great tonimarie! now you've got everyone wondering what "steamy" thread you're referring to! (Don't list or link it! that would just perpetuate the argument!)

I didn't know about anything going on either. I guess the saying of "No News Is Good News" is true! Sometimes ya just don't need to know. In my opinion: CC is a place of knowledge and connecting with people who have had some of the same struggles, some who will prevent me from FURTHER struggles and being able to receive and share advice on how to create a work of art through cake. Life is too short to be ticked off and lose focus of the very reason this site was created. Some of us are so passionate about what we do, that we don't have time for people's attitude to affect whether we're coming back. I say let's keep learning, giving each other support, and Create CAKE, CAKE, AND MORE CAKE! Happy Baking Everyone!

No problem aligotmatt!! It's just that after someone quotes a term I used in my post, I feel like maybe I offended them or something! Just wanted to be sure people know where I stand!

I love it here too, but like others, some days you just have to click that little X in the upper right corner and go do something else for a while! Hmmm... I guess that's when I bake those cakes!

LOL Nope not this old dog Debi... I think I'll stick to the nice threads

I am NOT unstable!! I'm just *interesting*.

I think you are all so nice in shareing you crafts with others, i to will when my sis comes and does it for me, would love for you to see my work.but mean while i will look and learn and brag and thank you all for all your help, yes doug thank you i dont want to be on your list...(wonder the name of his list he,he...)

As a member who was on everyday for two years straight...and looked at every single cake posted that day.....I have to to admit that in the past year or so I found it very hard to come on in the past year and WAIT FOREVER for the site to load to read some of the post on here! I remeber being new....and still feel I have alot to learn and share! I am very willing to do that but sometimes its not worth waiting for each page to load for bickering.
I know I have missed alot in the past year and I think its odd when I hear of people gone and stuff like great post loss of 08...... I really love and miss this place. But with the drama I have in my real life its not worth wasting minutes for it elsewhere!

Other than that if the site seems to move pretty quickly then I stay longer and try to look and answer questions but i think alot of the problems comes from a combination of the two........speed and tack.

On the other hand i think its great when people point out flaws and critique. because I am the kind of person that learns from my mistakes...and i hate when people hold back and give you the cookie cutter response on thats great!!! espcecially when you know the "average non-cake decorator is gonna say that" sometimes I see people say constructive stuff and get bashed, even when i thought there post was very helpful and nicely put.

In the end its a fine line to cross because we all want to gain different things from here and feel different!

I agree. Some of the posts do get nasty.

One post in particular, this was my first time really posting in a thread. And, I stated my two cents like everyone else. Before long, I saw my post stripped apart. There were numerous posts quoting bits and pieces of my post and making sarcastic remarks and saying if they were the OP, they would be offended by what I said. All because I didn't necessarily agree with everyone else. When I defended myself and stated that was not at all what I meant, I was then attacked again because everyone wanted to take up for the veteran and I was bashed again. At that point, i was done and never to return. Until one person PM'd me and said, I understand your pain. I too have been jumped on and everyone acts as if its no big deal. But, you were attacked and you have to learn to leave those posts or not post at all. That is exactly what I did for a while. I felt this place had a mob mentality... Then I realized, its just cake!

I think with all the postings, we have to learn how to respect each other, no matter what level we are. I see a lot of posts defending veterans and saying how great they are. I'm not saying they aren't because I'm sure their knowledge and posts have helped me. (So, please don't take it that way. You are great!) However, be careful. Because at the same time, you may be pushing someone else out who may also have something valuable to offer. And, as adults, I think we can all take care of ourselves. I don't think its necessary to defend or take up for anyone. Just understand that newbie is not the enemy! Sometimes, we just don't know.

We also have to be careful when we complain of people being nasty, we sometimes respond nasty. This just perpetuates the behavior. It doesn't resolve the issue or make the person nicer when they get a negative response in return. It just keeps the nastiness going. It may not be necessary to respond to the nasty posts. Ignore them. A post telling people to play nice is not going to make them play nice. Some people are kind and have a conscience... Some don't... I know I'm from the South. When I speak with customers from the North, I always hang up thinking how rude they are. But, they don't mean to be...

If the comment isn't true, then its not about you.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Maybe it's something we all need to remember. And when you read something that inflames you, makes you blind with fury, take a deep breath, walk away from the keyboard, remember that there are bigger issues in the world and in each and every one of our lives. And while we are all entitled to voice our opinions and beliefs, lets not forget that we can all temper our views with compassion and tact.

i tried to write my reply a couple of times, deleting it and rewriting and deleting and rewriting because i just can't find the words.

i just hope that no one's feelings get truly hurt by anyone on this board, because no one deserves it. i keep it my policy to help as much as i can, or point someone in the proper direction if i can't help. i like to spend my time in the unanswered topic thread to see if i can at least help someone.

in anycase, i think those who care shine and those who don't care eventually straighten out or leave when it's no fun amymore.

i have no idea where i am going with this. i am sorry that people feel they need to leave and hope nothing but the best in everything they choose to do. i hope cake central can flurish and continue to grow and i sincerely hope we can all be friends (corny as it sounds), because there are many people on here, who are worth it!

thanks for listening

I have to admit, I haven't come across much of the drama. But, I spend most of my free time in one specific forum. So I was kind of thinking things may just be getting blown out of proportion.

Then I read that Shirley left and people were mean to her.

I found the thread and it made me sick to my stomach how horrible people were to that kind and giving lady. Just so much disrespect towards her.

If I missed that thread I am sure I have missed many others.

I know I have had someone be very rude towards me and I allowed myself to get sucked in to the negativity. In this kind of environment (the net) its easy to do. So I know I am guilty also.

I think some people haven't grown out of that negative attention issue from childhood. Stop "rewarding" sh&t starters with attention and ignore them.

I hope I dont get tarred and feathered for this but at other forums the mods usually have some sort of system. Like 3 warnings and then your banned or suspended...maybe something like that would stop posters from nit picking.

yeah, but then you get into the discussion of "nit-picking" vs. "healthy discussion" vs. "just a different opinion". Whole 'nuther can of worms.

I used to be on this site daily.....but I found myself getting bitter.........there just seemed to be way too much JUDGING of each other... I would read posts and be in TEARS because I felt badly for the person whose opinion differed and was under siege..... and it was then and there I decided that I seriously had to curb my CC addiction. I still love the galleries, I still check out the Lounge now and then, but post SOOO much less than I ever used to.

Sometimes I think when we get to INVOLVED in the drama, we just need to take a step back and excuse ourselves from it all. Its just not healthy for us!!! Don't get me wrong, the internet is great.... but after watching yesterday's Oprah, I am feeling a bit guilty over my internet addiction, I wonder am I giving my "real" relationships the quality time and attention they need, or am I checking out by getting too involved in cyber ones???

When I was fairly new to cc I was attacked for something I said. Something I said about caking was turned around, I never figured out how, into having to do with something SO not about cakes. The person went on and on about it at me and I just left. It took the pleasure out of the whole site for me. I AM a sensitive person but I don't take everything personally. I love this site because the people here are great. That's why I came back. And lo and behold that one person had left.

I lurked here for a while before I became a member which of course is fine and many do it. It does seem to me that on occasion there has arisen a topic where people seeming from nowhere have chimed in with some very rude and/or mean comments. Don't get me wrong here, there have also been plenty who have been extremely nice. It's very aggravating to me when people pop out of the woodwork, so to speak, to make ugly comments or "fan the fires" of discontent. I find the vast majority of the members here to be courteous, helpful, fun, engaging and creative and thankful AND I appreciate you all!!

As far as saying "Thanks!" I find that doing that as a personal note thru pm's is much more well personal and effective than only doing it in the comments in the galleries. For one thing, if I leave a question with a comment on your picture I won't know you answered it unless I go back to your pic to check. Heck, I never remember to do THAT. I've made some great cake friends thru pm's and gotten and shared a TON if fun and helpful info that way. The recent down times have prompted me to start building an e mail list of ccr's I want to be able to stay in contact with.

I'll shut up now. For now.....Ã

There are some seriously "overzealous" *ahem* people on this site. I don't read or post near as often as I used to because of the drama I experienced simply from defending someone and trying to get the attack on her to stop. I even posted under a different name for a while because some of these people seemed to be digging for "dirt" on me in an effort to cause problems for me with my local health department (good luck with that! LOL!). And all because I had the nerve to go against the mob (and yes, that's what they had become).

I just now noticed the button "Report as a bad post"... I think I will be using that button in the future. LOL!

I truly believe in freedom of speech, but your right to say what you want ends where my right to enjoy this site (free of drama) begins.

I have seen my share of drama on these boards. It can get plain nasty. People say things purposefully to hurt someone when I don't think the person meant any malice by what they had done or said.

Most of us on here are women. Remember grade school and high school? This is the very thing that went on then. Aren't we grown women now? Some people just haven't grown out of it (and I have no specific person I am saying that to).

I"ve taught myself a little but the things I have learned here so far are invaluable!! I have learned so much in such a short amount of time. I'd hate to see anyone getting their feelings hurt and not coming back. I', new so I don't know what I am missing, but I hope I don't loose the wisdom of any of you!