What Should I Say To Her??? (Long, Venting, Sorry)

Decorating By summernoelle Updated 2 May 2007 , 3:07am by AngiesIdea

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oceanspitfire Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:03pm
post #31 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarolAnn

No way I'd make it for free, especially after all this. She said no, she'd make a diaper cake so that's exactly what I'd let her do/atttempt to do. It's in her court now. She was probably expecting you to come down on your price anyway. Somebody does that to me and they can find another cake. It's no skin off my nose. I'm not playing games anymore.

Sorry if I sound crabby, but I do get tired of even hearing about other people being treated this way.




I agree on that one. You start using your cakes (offering freebies) as peace offerings to rectify other situations, those are going to be expected, then when someone has to pay for one they'll be all choked. Keep your business separate.

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melysa Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:06pm
post #32 of 94

excuse me for a moment while i ponder....besides the whole issue...what is that about NOT having a real cake at a babyshower? thats like taboo. celebration...cake.../ cake....celebration. they go hand in hand icon_smile.gif

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summernoelle Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:15pm
post #33 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by melysa

excuse me for a moment while i ponder....besides the whole issue...what is that about NOT having a real cake at a babyshower? thats like taboo. celebration...cake.../ cake....celebration. they go hand in hand icon_smile.gif




Well, I forgot to tell you that she told me she is going to try to make petit fours. icon_lol.gif Let me emphasize try. Good luck with that!!

My DH had the same response when I said that about making the cake for free. He got pretty irritated and told me to tell her sorry, but no cake!

Thanks for advice!!

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nrctermite Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:29pm
post #34 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by melysa

excuse me for a moment while i ponder....besides the whole issue...what is that about NOT having a real cake at a babyshower? thats like taboo. celebration...cake.../ cake....celebration. they go hand in hand icon_smile.gif




I have to agree with the above comment - i mean cake is a must for everyday especially celebration icon_biggrin.gif LOL I just like cake

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ChristaPaloma Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:29pm
post #35 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by grama_j

Hey, if she can afford a "diaper cake", she can afford a REAL one..... she will have MORE than 50.00 in the other one....




Probably a rationalization on the 50 bucks, but I would think she will have at least an appreciation for the work involved when she does this.

Like others have said, it's about perspective and everyone has a uniqe one... to some people....50 bucks on cake is exhorbitant.... and that's OK... it really is.... she just should have told you that instead of waiting so long.... but that's her growth I guess...

But the free cake thing isn't necessary....c'mon...ya jus really wanna make cake huh? icon_biggrin.gif lol.... don't we all lol....

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ChristaPaloma Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:32pm
post #36 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by homecook

OMG! I can't believe you hit send....I'm sitting here with my eyes wide open icon_eek.gif and my hand clamped over my mouth tapedshut.gif

I hope it works out! I wouldn't do the cake, though.

My favorite thing to say when something I *may* have said that *may* not have been, um, complimentary, *may* have been said to the wrong person, is this:

"Yes, I said that. It's not a secret!" tapedshut.gificon_twisted.gif




hah I like that! ....

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justsweet Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:47pm
post #37 of 94

Sorry to hear what happen about the order.

I see no need for you to make a cake for FREE and she would not get back to after placing the order. Let it go, you said sorry.

By the way you really hit "reply" on purpose (JUST KIDDING), I thought that was so funny but now she will know how you feel.

You said she is going to make petit fours, make sure you are busy that day.


icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

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summernoelle Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 10:52pm
post #38 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by justsweet



You said she is going to make petit fours, make sure you are busy that day.


icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif




Think you are right about that. Those can be tricky!

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mizshelli Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:07pm
post #39 of 94

What the heck is a diaper cake??????????
I am flummoxed!!!!

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summernoelle Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:09pm
post #40 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by mizshelli

What the heck is a diaper cake??????????
I am flummoxed!!!!



It's a cake made out of stacks of real diapers. They are tiered and can have baby supplies like , daiper cream, shampoo and soap in them.

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bethola Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:09pm
post #41 of 94

Oh you poor dear! I made a TERRIBLE mistake in an e-mail when I sent a message to MY SON regarding a touchy subject with my friend (at the time) who is my daughter in law's cousin. Sent it to my son's e-mail....daughter in law picked it up! OOPS! STILL paying for that one 10 years later!!

I'm sorry this happened to you. BUT, I STILL wouldn't give her the cake.

Beth in KY

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mizshelli Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:15pm
post #42 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by summernoelle

Quote:
Originally Posted by mizshelli

What the heck is a diaper cake??????????
I am flummoxed!!!!


It's a cake made out of stacks of real diapers. They are tiered and can have baby supplies like , daiper cream, shampoo and soap in them.





Are you serious??????? I would love to see a picture, I'm gonna go google........

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mizshelli Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:18pm
post #43 of 94

HOW in the WORLD would that cost so much??!?!? Geez Louise, get a real cake you can eat already!!!!!!! I have never seen that done until now............I am so glad. I hope that lady has a real cake at her party so they don't eat the diapers.......lol

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Jopalis Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:24pm
post #44 of 94

Don't make the cake! You came here for advice...you got it. I would apologize for inadvertently venting on her but that you were upset... You could explain that considering the history of the relationship with her and her daughter you never expected this....

I just did the same thing on a message today but it wasn't a bad one. Meant to send to hubby and sent to someone else as a reply.

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pastryjen Posted 23 Apr 2007 , 11:35pm
post #45 of 94

About the petit fours - I agree you better be busy that day and when she asks to borrow a cup of icing sugar, you better be all out!

Just goggled a diaper cake - boy, that's ugly!

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indydebi Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 12:38am
post #46 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by pastryjen

....Just goggled a diaper cake - boy, that's ugly!




Oh geesh, I can't imagine spending any time, let alone money, building one of these! if that's what they like, okey dokey for them, but I'm not into "cutesy" crap.

"Cute" I can tolerate. But "Cutesy"? ..... no way!

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summernoelle Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 12:39am
post #47 of 94

Well, luckily, I didn't end up offering the cake. And after reading everything everyone has said, I definately won't be.
Still no response from the apology, though!
I'll let you know if she says anything.

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Janette Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 12:58am
post #48 of 94

icon_surprised.gif My heart jumped in my throat when you said you hit the key. I think we have all had that moment. I still shutter when I think about "she's standing behind me, isn't she, moment"

I have to tell you I worked for a company with about 4,000 employees when a HR Mgr sent out an e-mail. A manager that knew him personally sent a smart reply to "send all". That poor man never lived it down.

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summernoelle Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:08am
post #49 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by Janette

icon_surprised.gif My heart jumped in my throat when you said you hit the key. I think we have all had that moment. I still shutter when I think about "she's standing behind me, isn't she, moment"

I have to tell you I worked for a company with about 4,000 employees when a HR Mgr sent out an e-mail. A manager that knew him personally sent a smart reply to "send all". That poor man never lived it down.




I liked you signature at the bottom of your post. How true is that today!

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Kitagrl Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:16am
post #50 of 94

Thinking about how she pays money for some things and not others... some people think that decorators make too much "profit" or markup on cakes. After all, a cake only costs what a box of mix and some powdered sugar? icon_lol.gificon_confused.gif And most people don't realize that fondant is around $3-$4/pound. Don't know what kind of person she is, but if she is the type of person to come ask you for more money for expensive fund raisers, she may be the type of person who doesn't want to pay you what she thinks is a large profit "just to make cake". Seems to be the mindset of alot of people.

And yeah I went in with another lady to do a diaper cake one time and we tried to keep it cheap and we both put in $25 to make it. The sky's the limit on those.... whew! And I do think they are cute...but when you think about it, what new mom wants to have a whole bunch of bent diapers sitting around loose and not in the package?

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Janette Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:19am
post #51 of 94

I made a huge diaper cake for my Daughter and it was a mint. All those little Do Dads add up.

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Kitagrl Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:20am
post #52 of 94
Quote:
Originally Posted by Janette

I made a huge diaper cake for my Daughter and it was a mint. All those little Do Dads add up.




Not to mention it actually takes ALOT of newborn diapers to make the shape! (And diapers are not cheap, I hope I have my toddler out of them before the next one comes!)

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jamhays Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:24am
post #53 of 94

Here's a question.....who wants to go to a Baby Shower to eat a diaper cake?? icon_biggrin.gif

Real cake tastes MUCH better. hahahahaa

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Janette Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:26am
post #54 of 94

Now that you mentioned it

I used cloth diapers (you wouldn't remember) and when I went to buy the diapers for the cake I went into sticker shock. But then new Mothers aren't changing diapers every 5 min. and the washing - forget about it.

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Janette Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:28am
post #55 of 94

jam, have you been sniffing flour again icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

I was so thinking the same thing icon_razz.gif

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Kitagrl Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:28am
post #56 of 94

These diaper cakes are extremely cute but it would have been cheaper to buy the $50 cake!

http://www.lilbabycakes.com/babycakes.htm

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Sugar_Plum_Fairy Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:30am
post #57 of 94

Summernoelle, from a purely selfish standpoint, I would say maybe you should make the cake and enclose plenty of business cards. Maybe in the long run you'll get more orders out of it.

I would say simplify it a bit though - bring it down a level - just make a really nice sheet cake with some cute baby shower themed fondant decorations on top, or just save the fondant and not use it on this cake.

Just the selfish part of my brain thinking outloud. But don't feel obligated to make it just as an apology.

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Janette Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:34am
post #58 of 94

I looked at their cakes and they look nice with all the ribbons and bows but there really isn't much to them. And by the time you pay the shipping.

You can make one with trial size items and baby toys you get at the $1 store and it wouldn't be too much. The cost would be in the diapers.

Mine was so much because I bought expensive items to go on it. Only because it was my Daughter. I did put lots of ribbons to make it look even fuller.

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summernoelle Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:41am
post #59 of 94

Kitagrl,
She does do fund raiser stuff, and is constantly having Pampered Chef parties and things like that. And she is looking for new jobs all the time, like watching neighborhood kids or working at retail stores on the weekends (she stays home like me with her kids), but she also spends all the time, too. (Yes, I know everyone, it really is NONE of my business.)
So I do think that she is thinking that I am trying to be greedy and make money off her, when really, the cake I was going to make was worth that much.

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Kitagrl Posted 24 Apr 2007 , 1:43am
post #60 of 94
Quote:
Quote:

So I do think that she is thinking that I am trying to be greedy and make money off her, when really, the cake I was going to make was worth that much.




That's probably exactly it...she is the one who wants to make the money and get the deals, she does not want you making money. However nobody realizes fondant costs an arm and a leg and the profit on a nicely done cake (esp in time invested) is not nearly as much as many other job ventures.

And speaking of rip offs....Pampered Chef.... icon_biggrin.gif

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