No Need To Reply I Just Want To Vent
Decorating By galdamez Updated 12 Apr 2007 , 3:06pm by galdamez
My husbands aunt and his grandma are celebrating their birthdays together (been that their birthdays are only 4 days apart) the party is in two weeks and I wasnt asked to make the cake. 
I havent been decorating cake for a long time and I know that Im not that great but how else am I going to get better. Im a bit sad and it really hurt my confidence. I wanted to make a cheetah print handbag (inspired from the pictures in the gallery) I dont want to offer to make it because what if they dont like my cakes. There is no need to reply I just wanted to get this off my chest. Thanks for listening.
I know how you feel. My husband's family never asks me to make cakes. I even offered to bring one to Easter and they said no!! So I won't offer again!!
maybe they don't want to impose .... maybe someone else was in charge of the cake and it just slipped right past them that you make cakes .... maybe they are not aware that you are chomping at the bit to want to make a cake for them.
I always offer to make the wedding cake as a gift for my nieces/nephews and I offer to do catering for them at cost. If they accept my offer.... great. If they choose to make other arrangements, I'm fine with that. I want them to WANT my food, not to feel obligated to it. I don't take it personal. (Besides, when they make other arrangements, then I actually get to be a guest at a wedding!)
What about making a small individual cake for the birthday person(s) as your gift to them? When I threw my husband a 40th birthday party (some years ago!) I was surprised when 2 of the guests walked in with a small cake for him! My first thought is "didn't they assume I'd have a birthday cake for him?", but it was a nice contribution to the party!
Galdamez - You have a right to feel hurt. But there may be a good reason why you weren't asked. Is travel involved, a lot of people involved, another family cake maker, family owned bakery, daughter always made the cake scenerio, etc.......
Anyway, don't let it get you down. Adopt someone at the nursing home who does not receive visitors and start bringing in some cake. It would be so much more appreciated in the long run from a person who does not have that luxury..... 
Edited for spelling
Anyway, don't let it get you down. Adopt someone at the nusery home who does not receive visitors and start bringing in some cake. It would be so much more appreciated in the long run from a person who does not have that luxury.....
That is a GREAT idea!!! I have such a soft spot for people in nursing homes who have nobody visit them. It makes me so sad. You've inspired me to do that. Thanks!
Hey, my family is like The Kennedy's. In fact, we call my Uncle's home.. The Compound! LOL Everyone has an assignment (same assignment for EVERY event). My younger cousin is the photographer, her mom brings veggie and fruit trays, my older cousin does the punch and, of course, "I" do the cake. So, imagine my surprise when at Easter my uncle says "Beth, you bring the appetizers"! LOL No harm, no foul. It is traditional that my older cousin brings a "Bunny Cake" to the Easter Celebration and others brought sweets. I brought my spinach dip and mexican cheese dip and was happy!
Don't take it personally. It's family!
Beth in KY
I have the same problem with my in-laws. They are by no means too far away. I don't know whether to be offended or to take it as they think I am too busy. We always celebrate birthdays as a family at the grandmothers house and she always buys a store made cake. I am not sure why she does this, but it really aggrivates me. Again, I am not sure if she thinks I am too busy and doesn't want to bother me, but it is rather offensive that she doesn't even ask me if I am too busy. You have to know my in-laws though.
Everyone has an assignment (same assignment for EVERY event).
Beth in KY
This is how my side of the family is.
I know how you feel. My sister didn't order birthday cakes from me for her 2 kids this year. She ordered from Wal-mart!!! I was so hurt. What makes it worse is that she has 2 parties for each of them. One for friends from school and one for family. Wal-mart got all of her orders. She told me she couldn't afford to order their cakes from me this year??? I think she really just didn't like the fact that I get attention from it. She's a bit on the jealous side. Try not to take it personally, I know it's hard.
We have everyone bring what they are assigned, and for Easter I was to bring the cake. Mainly because after Easter dinner we were celebrating my son's first birthday which was that day. My mom-mom made a cake just for the fun of it, knowing that I was bringing the cake and everyone ate hers and were surprised when I told them there was a birthday cake for my son.
Another 2 cents pleaaaase.......I know when my Grandmother was little it was extremely wanton to purchase anything from the store if you could make it at home. So mom always had a homemade cake for her birthday. When I was growing up and my mother wanted a special surprise she would get us a store bought birthday cake because she liked being wanton.
Being an artist and very creative, I always made my sons treats to take to the school for his birthday. His friends thought we were poor.
Don't take it personally, sometimes it is just a generation thing like my grandmother. 
And other times it is purely a selfish reason, just like me wanting to bake it or like my mother wanted to prove she could afford to purchase the wanton bakery cake.
I'm sorry to hear this galdemez. Just try your best not to take it personally.
And flavacakes......I can't believe you OFFERED to bring a cake and they turned you down. Sometimes in laws are just plain difficult!
Oh I hear ya!! They are VERY difficult! 
I have yet to charge for a cake. I do it mostly for fun. I should be getting the invitation in the mail any day now. My husbands aunt is very fun and over the top, thats why I was thinking of doing the cheetah purse (this will be my first attempt at a purse) Im kind of hoping that they just forgot all about the cake and will ask me as the party gets closer. I get along great with my in-laws, but it would hurt my feelings if I offer to make the cake and they turn me down.
Maybe I just need to relax, not stress, stop worrying and have a cupcake. 
Freedom lies in being bold.
Your right I think Im going to do it, I will ask her. The worst that can happen is her saying no. if she doesnt want me to make the cake its ok after all it is her birthday. I just cant let it get to me. Lets hope I get the invitation today that will be the perfect excuse to call her and ask.
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