Well I am at the stage where I need to decide whether I want a third and final child!! I am only 38 and neither one of us has been fixed.My husband tells me the other day he would like to have another one but I'm the one who doesn't want to ...My two kids are now 6 and 4..Am I silly to think about a newborn..starting all over again.....I am kinda feeling like my kids grew up and I never got to enjoy them and being lonely once they are both in school all day.Hubby says it's too late there is too much age difference...I say no there isn't..

Thoughts anyone!!!



Laurel

Well, my twin sister and I were born when our Mom was 38.

We have a brother (four years older) and a sister (ten years older) who have both always been very special.

Also my two kids, both boys, are seven years apart.

As an aside, I have regretted a few choices in my life - but never my decision to have children

HTH

My sister is 4 years older than me, and I never felt it was too much of an age difference.
DH sometimes says he wants another baby, but I just don't. That's just me. Our kids are 5 and 7 and I just don't want to start over again.
No one can make the decision for you, but no, it's not too late. If you really feel that you want another child, then go for it. I don't think the age difference is an issue. My DH's family is so spread out that he has a brother 7 years older than him and a nephew 7 years younger than him.
On the other hand...your kids are in school all day, but they're not grown up, you still have many years to enjoy them.
Make a list of all the pros and cons. Write everything down, no matter how ridiculous or frivolous it seems, then sit down with DH and have a heart to heart. Go with your heart.

I think its a great age difference my kids are 4 nearly 5 years apart and I love it I feel like I got to devote a lot of good time to my son before my DD came along and now my son is older and in school all day so I get to devote the same attention to my DD who is 3 now plus my son helps so much with her and teaches her so much my Dh and I want a 3rd but for some reason are having trouble conciving even though the first two we convieved right away If you want to bless your life with anther child the age difference should not be a concern.

My daughter and first son are 4 years, 4 months apart, and my 2 sons are 3 1/2 years apart. We both really wanted a third child. But, if I knew then what I know now, I would have stopped at 2. I love my son SO much, please be clear on that, and I've never trade him for anything, but life was much harder and more complicated with 3 children. There was never enough of me to go around, and he wasn't an easy child. He's an absolute love now at almost 16, kind and easygoing, but it was a long road to get there.

It is never too late. Yes, it is always hard to start over, but it doesn't sound like it has been that long since your last baby. The age difference is not a big deal either. My boys look at their little sister differently, but it is a good different. They adore her and play pretty well with her. Often better than with each other.

I knew I was done after 3 horribly ill pregnancies. Actually I knew I was done after the first, but we wanted 3 kids so I got tough. It was the best thing I could have done.

Good Luck! You'll make the right decision.

Well, it's certainly not too late. But, what works for one family doesn't always work for another. I always wanted a big family, like 8 or more kids. But, I've been battling depression since I was in 8th grade and I realized after our 4th that even though I'd like more kids, I just can't handle it emotionally. You see both me and my husband came from 2 kids houses, but have lots of aunts and uncles. Hubby's sister killed herself before I met him and while it may seem morbid, one of the reasons we wanted a lot of kids was that if one or more died there wouldn't be just one left. Sounds horrible, but hubby grew up witha sister, but is really like an only child now.

Age differences are all relative too. I used to think it'd be great to have our 4 we have now and then have just one later on in life. But, I finally decided I was happy with our family and hubby got snipped. If we ever change our minds, we'll adopt. I'm adopted and I've always wanted to adopt myself.

I was 37 when #3 was born & not ready to quit. However, my dad had cancer & died 6 mos later & I got fixed before #3 was 1 yr old. I now (43) regret that decision made in grief - I would have liked another one.

Also, I was 6 & 8 yrs younger than my sisters & we are pretty close. It's almost like being an only child, because they got married when I was 11, but I helped raise their kids, so it was a good difference.

Good luck & best wishes with whatever you decide. (Have twins & then age difference really won't matter! ) Every child is a blessing!

As many people have said, it is totally a decision that you have to make for yourself and your husband and what is best for your family. But my sister and I are 5 1/2 years apart and we've always been very close. When we were little, we were far enough apart to be at totally different stages so there was never any competition between us. Then by the time she was in high school, we got to be more "friends" and we've been close friends ever since. Whatever you choose, it will work out for the best. If you really want another baby, I say do it! Some people just have one or two and know in their heart that is enough and others really want to have a larger family.

My hubby is one of 5 and my neighbors have 5 kids, when I asked my MIL and my neighbor how they managed all those kids, they both said the EXACT same thing...that the 3rd kid was the hardest, not that the child was the hardest per se, but that it just seemed like a lot more family with a 3rd kiddo...but they each went on to have 2 more but said it wasnt bad because by the time the 4th came, the 1st born was old enough to help out a lot.

We are done at two children but there is a 4 year difference in age and I LOVE it. I had wanted them closer together but my husband didn't see the point since he was 6 years younger than his brother. My oldest reads to his brother and plays with him and when my oldest is in school I can do things with the younger one.

If we had decided on a third I would have made sure that there was at least a 4 year difference again.

If you want another child don't let the age difference stop you, you might find you like it better than the age difference between the older two.

I am at the exact same point in my life as you are. I am 30, and our boys are 6 and 4. I would love to have a little girl, but almost feel like we would have to have 2 more children instead of just one more. Even numbers just seem so much easier than odd. right now, we can get a season pass to an amusement park and we all have someone to ride with. My boys are 22.5 months apart, and my youngest will be 5 in August. We would be looking at almost a 6 year age difference. It almost feels to me like I waited too long to decide, and now we should just stick with 2. We'll see! Good luck in your decision!

My children are almost 5 and almost 3. They have birthdays next month. DH and I were talking about having another one. Lo and behold if I wasn't already expecting. We are still fairly young though. Not sure how we'll handle another but we'll find out in October.

JuLinda

Congrats butterfly!!!!! Good luck to you and your family.

I too am having to decide to have another one or not. I am 39. I have 2 girls, aged 13 and 3 and a son 10. The 13 and 10 yr old are from my first marriage. #3 came along as a surprise...but a good one. Now I'm starting to think about the older 2 growing up and being closer as they are truly brother and sister while my youngest is from my second marriage. I don't want my youngest to be 'alone or left behind'. We both want another...I'm worried about my age..argh!!! and of course the money.......

I had my 5 th child when I was 40 ( she was a surprise ! ) there is 8 years difference between her & my youngest son, 16 years between her & my oldest son - all 4 of my boys love her to pieces - I don't think age gaps matter too much - would I have another baby closer to her ? In a heartbeat but I'm a single mum, so I don't see that happening !

I agree with another poster.....going from 2 to 3 kids is much different than going from 1 to 2, but I wouldn't change it for the world. My last (and 3rd) child was a complete surprise.....we sold all of our baby stuff in a garage sale the weekend before we found out she was coming! I thought my life was complete with my 2 older sons, but she rounded us out and I'm so grateful for her! That being said, it is really a personal choice and I wish you only the best, whatever you decide!

My DS and DD are just over 2 years apart, and I couldn't be happier. They are now 9 and 7. DH had wanted to have another as he was the baby from a family of 6. I couldn't bear the thought of having another. Both pregnancies were very bad. Plus DH is 52 and I'm 37, so I had my tubes tied. Best thing I ever did. I also agree about the 3rd child thing. I like even numbers.