I am a home baker and I hold my tasting at the local coffee shop, I had a wedding consultation/tasting today with a couple, whom by the way is getting married in less than 60 days. The bride asked me "Are the cakes on your website, cakes you've made or did you just swipe them from somewhere". I was very offended by this statement, I remained a Christian and assured her that I had made the cakes.
I could not get this out of my head for the rest of the consultation. If you have to question someone's integrity, why would you want them to make your wedding cake. I thought she was rude. Am I over reacting?

Wow...I can't believe she said that! I think you handled it very well...I would have had to tell her she had some nerve to ask such a question!

Yep, you're over-reacting. It seems to be common for people to swipe pictures from the Internet and claim to have done the work themselves. The bride doesn't know you so you can't take it personally. She's interviewing you for this important role in her wedding just like you would a doctor before letting them perform surgery. She wanted to make sure you can deliver the cake you are showing her.

I agree with Jonny cakes 1966. A lot of people do take pictures and I believe that it happen to me on my wedding day. I think the lady who made my cake took pictures from other people because the cake tasted great but looked ok not like the cakes on her website.

I think it's ok to confirm "Are these all your cakes?"
But I think it's over the line to say "Did you swipe these?"

Part of the consult is for the bride to get a chance to interview you and what you can do for her. Her wording was poor but I think it's fair for a bride to ask if all the work you show is your own.

And in fact, I'd have said, "Excuse me?" & if they didn't take it back
or smooth it over or amend what they said--I'd close the consult.
Mmmbubye!

I think I'd be offended, knowing they were mine....but being offended doesn't mean losing your cool, or your sense of humor.

It's probably a questions faced more and more in this day and age. You weren't ready for it this time, but next time I bet you'll have a response ready that not only dispels the myth, but sells the cake.

What a classless, rude broad.............. And no, it wasn't ME in disguise

I agree, I'd have probably said, "Excuse me?" and if she didn't squirm a bit and back pedaled, I'd have probably been booked.

There's a right way and a wrong way to ask a question, especially about another person's integrity--and THAT was the WRONG way.....

If my "filter" had been out for servicing, I most likely would have whispered, "Yep. Stole every one of those images. Never made a cake without stars piped on it or more than 2 inches tall in my entire life, but, hey, you gotta' start somewhere, right? Why NOT with YOUR WEDDING CAKE? Now, how high are we goin' with this puppy? The sky's the limit, baby!!!!

Rae

I believe it was poor wording on her part. I think she needs a class in tact. But hardle yourself professionally and just say "Yes, this work is my own. I dont believe in misrepresenting myself". And leave it at that.
Over reaching? No, I think I would of been thrown off too if someone said it to me that way. And if you did post pictures of other peoples work, you probably would lie to the bride and say it was anyways! If your THAT dishonest to do something like that and not atleast put "These are examples by so-so (with their permission ofcourse) of things I can do." But personally, if I wanted to show an example of something and have it on my website, I would recreate it myself in the first place!!

I think life's too short to over-analyze what people say. Sometimes people say things that sound worse than what they mean. And if you have to ask if you should be offended then the answer is probably "no".

Nah, I wouldn't be offended. It's a common problem these days. It may have been worded tactlessly, but it's a legit question. I've had brides ask me if ALL these pictures are mine. I answer, "Of course! Why on earth would I show you pictures of someone else's cakes?" In an incredulous tone of voice.

I'm sorry if they implied the photos might not be your's...that came across rather rude. Your work is obviously good if she's interested in you in the first place.

What exactly does "remained a Christian" mean? I'm not Christian, but I am spiritual/religious... I guess that statement confused me a bit.

You're overreacting. I tell brides to ask if the pictures they're being shown are the work of the baker, or if they came from other places. You'd be surprised at how many people have photos from other people on their websites, including pictures from books. I had one couple recently tell met that they'd been to a tasting where the woman had pictures torn from magazines in her album, and pictures that were printed off the computer. They also said that it was pretty obvious which ones were her own cakes, since there was a huge quality difference between those and the ones she'd taken from other people.

If she'd asked me that I probably would have thought it was funny, since I think the word "swipe" is amusing. I also would have told her what I tell other people who ask if I've made all of the cakes in my albums, which is that they're smart to ask.

I have been asked many times if the cakes on my website were my work. I don't get offended by it. I just say of course they are I only put my work on my website.

At one time, I would have thought it an odd question because in my head "who uses pictures they didn't make?"

I would get so mad at hubby when he'd make a point to tell people "Every photo on her website is food/cake that she's actually made." I'd be exasperated because "why the heck are you 'defending' me in something that no body does!?" I thought that by pointing it out, it was sounding like he "protests too much". I NEVER imagined anyone doing it any other way.

Then I started coming across catering, cake and other sites that DID use canned photos and I understood.

It's a legit question.

Jenn, I just checked out your website. Beautiful, beautiful work!

Debi, how the heck DID you get almost 25,000 posts on here? I feel like I run my mouth and I STILL only have 200!

I think it could have been said much nicer...she sounded pretty rude about it. But I've had similar doubts from clients...they say "Will my cake look just like the one on your website?" Which is alot nicer way to ask the same question. haha.

From your point of view its only natural to get offended but you have to see it from her point of people. People do misrepresent other peoples work as their own

It's a reasonable question just a dunderheaded no class way of asking. I'd have probably become suddenly busy.... my tolerance is at an alllll time low at the moment!

Itâs called tact (discretion: an intuitive sense of what is right or appropriate) and it is a dying art these days! The Bride could have used a little!

YOINK! (ok, I'm done...)