oh my! You should suggest her wedding song be "You're So Vain" by Carly Simon... she doesn't care about anything except how she looks!
you are getting payment for everything upfront I hope... I wouldn't trust her as far as I cold throw her... speaking of which... lol!
Are the 3 dresses from weddings that didn't happen? Don't you kinda feel sorry for the guy she's marrying? 
And she thought, since you're so close she can make it in no time.....even 30 min past the appt time. I would love to see a pic of this girl b/c I have a mental pic of her---kinda Jessica Simpsonesque
it's funny you mention that she is foreign- my cousin is teaching in Korea and married someone from there. They came back to Canada for the wedding ( then moved back) She was amazed at how far in advance you had to do things! She apparently went looking for a wedding cake the week of ( the only week they were here before the wedding) and was shocked. She said there you could go in a day or two before. She was stunned at how slow paced our lives were here. She said you rush around all the time there and can buy things with very quick turnaround.
They ended up getting a cake from the grocery store.
She was stunned at how slow paced our lives were here.
she's calls that slow paced? 
When I have to book a year in advance, I dont' call that slow paced. I call that having to get on the ball and get it done NOW or it won't get done. I can't go along at a "slow pace" and get everything at the last minute...... I have to "hurry up" and get it all done ahead of time.
How interesting the different viewpoints are!
Even the McD's party rooms/ parties are booked 3 or more months in advance...lol.
So, she will carry the cake (because she has no flowers), CAN changed the dress when she smears it (because she has 3 
) and the venue will be the parking lot at the local JP's office?
I guess it would be fast paced for the bakers not the clients .lol. She was just remarking about everything being slow to her. Hell I remember my cousin talking about how rushed everything in the cities there was. He once saw someone who had his foot run over by a car and the driver got out and yelled at him! She said we even moved slow here. But to her basically it came as a surprise that she would have to plan everything so far in advance . They did manage to get things like flowers , and a gorgeous venue for the wedding ( it was booked a little bit before by family here - not within that week lol- more like a month or two in advance. )
I know a wedding can be planned in a quick time period. The bride can't be picky at all though. I planned mine in less then 6 months. I was working and going to school full time and graduated 2 weeks before I got married. Picked out a dress off the rack , got a pre packaged flower deal at the florist. Got a venue - everything... but had I been picky about any of those things it wouldn't have worked . lol.
Bride scheduled for a tasting and design consult today at 3pm.
But that's just backstory. Here's the BEST.
"I was late because I didn't realize how close you are to my house."
You are so close that she got lost on her way!!! 
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