I just thought I would share what my little boy surprised us with today...here is what was said between DH and DS who is 5....
DS:"Daddy pretend I'm Donkey (from Shrek) and ask me if I want some coffee"
DH: "Okay, Donkey do you want some coffee?"
DS: "No" .... "Donkey would never say no to coffee"
DH: "Why not?"
DS: " Because Donkey thinks Coffee is the best thing on the whole DAMN planet!"
LOL Hubby came into the room where I was to tell me what he said...I laughed so hard. He hasn't ever said anything like that before. Apparently Donkey says this line in Sherk. Of course when DH told DS we shouldn't say that word the poor thing broke down in tears and wouldn't stop crying, i tried to console him... while secretly laughing to myself. 
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Awww!
According to my father, my first "real" word (other than mama, dada, baba) was $h!t. 
Apparently he was working on the car and I was playing nearby and heard him say it. Next thing he knows, I'm pretending to "fix" my toy car and repeat what I heard my dad say.
He is always so proud when he repeats this story! (And, no, that's not sarcasm, my dad's just a bit odd! 
)
My DS first swear was the F bomb. My youngest was having terrible nosebleeds and one night he had a really good one. He was about 14 months so he struggled with DH and I while we tried to get it to stop. It was 2am he was covered in blood I was covered in blood DH was covered in blood.
My 3yr old walked in the bathroom took one look at the scene and quietly declared "Oh, F***." Very matter of factly. It was perfect. DH and I are trying desperately not to laugh, while explaining we don't say that word and still trying to stop the bleeding!
Just thinking about it still makes me laugh!
When my daughter was 2 she came down the stairs in her long nightie and wearing a tiara...carrying about 10 dolls and stuffed animals. I held my breath that she wouldn't fall (she was about 5 steps from the bottom before I saw her) when, on the second to last step down she went! She just bounced down on her bottom, but all the dolls and animals went flying. She got up, adjusted her nightie, put on her tiara, looked at all the dolls and animals scattered around, shook her head and said "son of a B*TCH!"
I spit out my soda.......
Now, my oldest son would hammer on his Little Tykes tool bench when he was two and it would be "bang....bang....f*ck.....bang....bang...f*ck" I sat him down and said "ADAM....that is NOT a nice word and you can't say that!". He got all teary and said he HAD to say it! When I asked why, he said boys have to say it when they're building a house! At that point my husband bit his lip and practically ran out of the room! That father/son bonding time was really a great idea!
Jodie
I learned the down-side of having a toddler with advanced language skills. When my daughter was 2, I had rented "Good Will Hunting" and was watching it during her nap. Really good movie, but uses the f-word a lot! She happpened to wake up a little early, and there was just about 15 minutes left of the movie, and I had to return it that afternoon, so I went ahead and finished watching it. She was playing in the adjoining play room and didn't seem to be paying attention at all, or so I thought.
Over the next couple of days, I heard her use at least 3 different variations, in perfect context: f-ing, f-you, don't f with me! 
I felt like the worst mother ever. I decided to just ignore it rather than call attention to it, and fortunately after a couple of days of not hearing the word again, it disappeared from her vocabulary, at least for another 10-12 years that is.
OHH how life is so clean to a child 
My daughter is the youngest of 6 kids and the only girl. the boys had always been good with their speech and I can never recall hearing them swear but my daughter was a different matter.
She sat at the dinner table playing with play doh when all of a sudden she shouts 'b@ll@ks' I was so shocked and my husband sat and explained that it was a naughty word but she continued to use it for a while.I tried to work out where she had heard it. Blamed the boys as they are much older than her. My whole family then turned on me and said 'mum it is you that says it' I protessted wildly until I realised I did say it alot when decorating cakes
Now she just says 'BUZZ'
well, when my son was little, maybe 3 or so, we were in the grocery store and all through the store he kept saying s@#T so trying to ignore him and the looks from all the old ladies. I kept saying chips you want chips?
My youngest first swear word was the f bomb and he was maybe 4 or 5 then he ended up with some soap in the mouth (sunlight dish soap) not much just a little on my finger to get my point across. Well about a week later, my oldest went to a friends house, and his mother sent home cookies, one bite from the youngest and he starts spitting them out yelling they are soap cookies. They were lemon cookies and boy did we all get a laugh out of that. To this day he doesn't realize why he really doesn't like lemon flavored anything.
My SIL(Wendy) was 4 or 5 in England and there was a woman she didn't like because the woman was always telling lies about all of the children in the neighbourhood. So one day Wendy tells my FIL (Peter) "Dadddy, that woman's a f***ing liar and I don't like her". He tell her "Wendy, that is not a nice word to use." She says to him "sorry, Daddy. She's a f***ing fibber and I still don't like her".
He said he almost p*ssed himself because he was laughing so hard.
My husband and I were at a friends house one night and the dad was trying to teach his 5 year old son how to say rediculous. All the kid kept saying was daddy dickless daddy dickless. It was so funny. We were all trying so hard not to laugh but we literally had tears in our eyes. He was trying to tell his son that is not how you say it but that's all his boy could say. Kids say the funniest things. Gotta luv em! 
When one of my nephews was around 2, he was playing in the yard with his Papa and had an "accident" and pooped his pants. As my dad (Papa) walked my nepnew to the house to get him cleaned up, my nephew looked down, shook his head and said with all seriousness "Shi!t." It was just so literal my dad couldn't help but laugh. 
What kind of cake?
When my brother was little he couldn't procounce tr sounds it was always and f sound. My teenage sisters loved to have him say truck.
When my daughter was about 2 1/2 the house got too quiet and I went to look for her. Our french doors were open and she was sitting on the back porch holding her little doll up with one hand, pointing in its face with her other little hand saying " Buck you, Buck you". She couldn't pronounce her f's either. I was laughing so hard I had to go sit down before I could go back and tell her it was a bad word.
My youngest first swear word was the f bomb and he was maybe 4 or 5 then he ended up with some soap in the mouth (sunlight dish soap) not much just a little on my finger to get my point across. Well about a week later, my oldest went to a friends house, and his mother sent home cookies, one bite from the youngest and he starts spitting them out yelling they are soap cookies. They were lemon cookies and boy did we all get a laugh out of that. To this day he doesn't realize why he really doesn't like lemon flavored anything
And this is why I can't use palmolive dish soap!!
My son's first was the f bomb too. He was 2. We went to dairy queen for ice cream. He got upset about having to leave. When we put him in the car he yelled "gavin's not going f-ing home!" when we got home he was still mad. He has a favorite teddy bear and DH tried to give it to him and he said "don't want f-ing bear!"
My sister called me a "farta$$" when she was 2. One time she was in first grade and I was cleaning out her school folder and found a piece of paper that said Tiffany is b!tch!
One time she was in first grade and I was cleaning out her school folder and found a piece of paper that said Tiffany is b!tch!
.... Sounds like something I would have done!
My oldest nephew always had trouble with the word "frog". It came out as the f bomb. I'm 8 years older than him so when he was having trouble with that word I was like... 11 or 12 so I, of course, thought it was the funniest thing in the world. I think I got in more trouble for trying to make him say it, than him actually saying it
Awww!
According to my father, my first "real" word (other than mama, dada, baba) was $h!t.
Apparently he was working on the car and I was playing nearby and heard him say it. Next thing he knows, I'm pretending to "fix" my toy car and repeat what I heard my dad say.
He is always so proud when he repeats this story! (And, no, that's not sarcasm, my dad's just a bit odd!
)
OHHH I had to write you because my dad's (he's 80) favorite story is when he was outside working on something and I was sitting in my sandbox and he hit his finger with the hammer I ran inside (I sorta remember this) and got my peg board (it's a old toy that you used to hammer the pegs down one way and then turn it over and hammer them back the other). He said I hammered my finger jumped up grabbed my finger, hopped around my sandbox, and kept yelling "Hot Dam#, Hot Dam$)...he loves to tell that story also....same type of dad I guess....
well, when my son was little, maybe 3 or so, we were in the grocery store and all through the store he kept saying s@#T so trying to ignore him and the looks from all the old ladies. I kept saying chips you want chips?
My youngest first swear word was the f bomb and he was maybe 4 or 5 then he ended up with some soap in the mouth (sunlight dish soap) not much just a little on my finger to get my point across. Well about a week later, my oldest went to a friends house, and his mother sent home cookies, one bite from the youngest and he starts spitting them out yelling they are soap cookies. They were lemon cookies and boy did we all get a laugh out of that. To this day he doesn't realize why he really doesn't like lemon flavored anything.
That's halarious!
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