A little backstory-- my husband's ex wife and I have a tense, yet civil relationship. They have been split for 9 years, DH and I have been together for 8 (married for 6)years (his son with ex is 9 1/2) We see each other at least weekly due to our custody arrangement.

So, EX is getting married and sent me an email asking if I could make a wedding cake for her, but here are the catch's

*the wedding is in Florida and the cake will need to drive with them and the 4 kids(one being a 4 week old baby) and luggage in small SUV
*here are some links of one's she likes and can I do them (simple icing with seashells- I got the condescending tone on this one)
*her and the fiance can't decide between lemon or yellow and may need a tasting
OK- here's the best part......

THERE ARE ONLY GOING TO BE 12 GUESTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!WTF

I realize that I have a different take being so close to the situation, but really? A tasting for a 12 person "wedding" cake? And to ask all of this of your EX-HUSBAND's new wife?

sorry, I just had to share with other cakers---

I think *Ex-lax* comes in lemon flavor!

sorry couldn't resist



I don't know if I could bake a Wedding cake for an ex......hmmm No, I couldn't do it, you're a good sport for even entertaining the possibility.

I think we're gonna hear some interesting stories about this one in the near future.

I think I could do the cake but she is asking for a little to much for me. Yeah got to LOL at that one.

So....12 servings=a 6 inch round for party servings.

Charge her $25/slice.



Love to see the look on her face when she sees a 6 inch round on her table.

I think I would politly let her know that she should "p/u" her cake somewhere close to the venue. Oh, I'm sorry did that sound condesending?,lol. I mean really, why should you even bother. Maybe to keep the peace, you could just be too busy. JMHO as an ex.

What does your husband say?

hubby just laughed when he read about it being driven to Florida.

I MIGHT have considered doing something (for the sake of our oldest), but with the cake being driven to Florida, I just don't think its a very good idea.

DUDE

That's high-larious!!

my DH has an ex, too. I feel your pain

Take the "ex" out of it and it's still an order that you wouldn't do, for all the logical reasons.

That is funny!! but to keep the peace you could find a decorator here that is close to her venue to do the cake for her.

But seriously - why even have a wedding cake fore 12 people??

I mean we only had like 25 people, but we did the smallest cake that the decorator would do - still fed 75, but I wanted a wedding cake. I probably would have done something else for only 12 guests!!

6 inch with a dozen cuppies???

Send her to Mara's shop (risquebusiness - she used to be a member). I'm sure that she could come up with something from her repertoire which would describe the bride to a T!

Theresa

Oh, that is funny! My ex-husband girlfriend has been telling me for years that I WILL be making their cake when they get married....I have done a couple of orders for her so I had no problem with it - they would be charged the same price as anyone else.....

Well, she made the mistake of well and truly pissing me off a couple of months ago and I won't have anything to do with her now. My son tells me (thru his laughter - he's 15 so it's not like he's a little kid stuck in the middle) that she is so upset that I we aren't 'friends' and all she cares about is making up so I'll do the dang cake! (and keep sending cakeballs, which I also stopped doing).

I just cannot wrap my head around all the hoopla for a 12 person wedding cake.

I have had the same thing happen to me years ago. My first husband got caught cheating and I filed for divorce. He had the nerve to ask me 3 months later if I would be willing to make their wedding cake (they had to get married; she was 6 months pregnant). I didn't know what to say at first but I finally agreed just to get him to quit bugging me. I ended up not having to do it because they never got married. However, I have made all 4 of his aunts wedding cakes (lol) and just got finished making her daughter's and son's wedding cakes last month. Some people never cease to amaze me.

in sharing ex husband stories.... he called me and asked to borrow my cake equipment so HE could make a wedding cake for someone he knew. The man had never made a wedding cake ever. The most he ever did was take one out of the oven once for me. I told him I had no idea where it was ... it was all buried in storage in my parents basement at the time. I should have dug it out and loaned it to him just so I could see what a cake wreck he would put out!

By the way, he told my kids that he taught me everything I know about cakes and cooking. Even tho' they were little kids, they knew how funny THAT statement was!

It sounds like his ex is a little nutty! You all don't get along and yet you're supposed to make the cake for 12 people? And they want a tasting?? Hands down, wouldn't do it. But I love Summer's suggestion of $25/slice. Haha.

It's just selfishness run amuck!

I have an ex and he and his wife are like that. But knowing I am one that can't say no I have done SO MUCH for them. I loaned them two of my cars, they got thrown out of their house and my husband and I let them move in with us for a few weeks while we helped get them another house, we have loaned them money, and even gave both of them a job (only for them to go where I work part time and tell them that we screwed them out of money).

The moral of this is....DON"T DO IT! I don't care if she gets mad...JUST DON"T DO IT! You will regret it. The madness of you saying no is going to cause less problems for you than her saying you overcharged her or the cake was poorly constructed (after that long hot drive), or it tasted bad (after it has sit in a hot car for lord knows how long.

Take it from the Doormat of all Doormats here...DON"T DO IT!

Wow...ok after reading all the posts on this (ex-lax being my personal favorite) the question to ask yourself is this....

If it were a complete stranger asking you to do the exact same thing would you do it? If yes then by all means bake the cake; if not then politely tell her that you are already booked and wont have the time.

Some times there is keeping the peace (in the same situation with hubby's ex) and at other times it is just plain out and out foolish to think that it is even possible (again with hubby's ex)...Koodo's to you for trying

lol... I like the lemon exlax...but then again..Is just a chocolate on chocolate what you need.
Edna

When my ex remarried, he hired security guards to make sure I didn't do anything to them, stupid and expensive for him to do. I'm not sure why he thought I would try show up and embarrass myself and my kids who were there!

Not likely to ask me to bake a cake for them, but if they had, and I had, I sure would have loved to use the lemon Exlax!

I don't have an ex -- but this is still funny!

I don't have an ex -- but this is still funny!

I agree... take the fact that you know them out of the picture, and if you wold say no that's not possible then just say no that's not possible. Offer to help find her a decorator in the area if you are feeling super nice, but you don't own her anything.

I have made cakes for my ex's girlfriend... I see nothing wrong with it as we get along well (my ex and I). If he were to get re-married I would make his cake if he asked me to, but there is no animosity between us so that's different. A tasting for a 12 person wedding cake? Ummmm... no. I would tell her she could buy a sampler if she wanted to taste something.

Ok- so this was my response

While I appreciate you considering me to make you wedding cake, there are a few concerns that make me think it might be better for you to find a decorator closer to the venue. First, transporting a cake (especially if it is multiple tiers) can be tricky, and even more so when driving such a distance. While I'm sure you will have the AC on for most of the ride, if the sun is hitting the cake box for a while, it might affect the icing and the chocolates that the seashells are made from. Also, for only 12 guests, it will be hard to have more than one tier. I'm assuming you want more than one tier because all of the pics you sent had multiple tiers. If you'd like, I can check with some of the decorators that I know in Florida and see what kind of availability they have. I'd just need to know which town you will be closest to (I wasn't sure if you were staying in the park or not) and the date that you would actually need the cake.


Sound good?