Ok, so I knew I had to come to CC to vent even though it isn't cake related. I am so upset! I posted a little while back when we were all saying what we are thankful for this Thanksgiving, and I mentioned that I found out the night before Thanksgiving my husband and I are expecting our first child. We've only been married 9 months, but have been together almost 3 years. Anyway, many of you know I suffer from IC and have serious complications from it. I talked over the pregnancy with my doctor, and he took me off my medicines and replaced them with other safe, effective treatments. Ok, so I call home to tell my mom thinking I might get some excitement out of her. Nope...here we are 5 days after Thanksgiving and she's telling me how the baby will be have something wrong with it because of my health, how I'm too young (I'm almost 25), how we don't have enough money, how irresponsible this was of me, I mean I could go on all night. She had nothing positive to say at all, and said she will not be telling other members of my family. She did this over my wedding too, and would not accept the wedding was actually happening until the day before. And again, she refused to tell anyone in the family until after the wedding. Now I know my mom has issues and can't find the good in anything, but she trashes everything good in my life. My cake decorating, my husband, now my unborn child. I'm so upset, my child will not have the spoil-happy grandparents like other kids. Why me??? I'm already on an emotional roller coaster, now I am worried I'll pass something horrible to my child. Any comforting words out there for a first time mom-to-be???
sweetie, i'm so sorry & i know i don't have the right words to make it feel better, please remember that this is your's & your husband's life, live it for your family, i'm sorry i can't think of the right words, bless you & your husband through this trying time w/your mom.
also CONGRATS TO YOU & YOUR DH
It certainly is a scary situation to be expecting your first child.....normally grandmothers-to-be are overjoyed, it's true. While, it's obvious your mom has issues, you need to cut yourself off someone so toxic. You need to find supportive people who will help you. Think about YOURSELF and your CHILD first and foremost. She may come around, that would be great. But if she doesn't, please don't let her negativity bring your spirit or your child's spirit down! A child needs a loving POSITIVE family.
I hope that when your mom sees what she's missing, that she will change her ways. Perhaps someone can have a chat with her. She may not realize how her words affect others.
Best of luck....we will always be here for you.
Congratulations! You need to take care of yourself and your little one now. Don't let anyone get you down, not even your mother. Listen to your doctor and follow what he says. As you said, your mom has issues and you don't have to listen to them.
DO NOT let anyone bring you down. You are having this gift of life for yourself and your husband and not for anyone else. If your Mum does this all the time then you need to learn how to block her cruel comments (I know it's harder than it sounds but trust me). If you are upset during your pregnancy, that is when your baby can be hurt. Look after yourself and your baby and don't worry about anyone else.
CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR PREGNANCY!!!
God Bless
Families can be trying! As the others have said, surround yourselves with positive supportive people. I don't see my Mom much for many of the same reasons. I would not have friends that treat me like that, why should I let my family?
Hang in there. You will have a great baby! Congrats to all of you! 
to your mom: every party needs a pooper, that's why we invited youper...party pooper! 
sounds like mom needs to grow up!
----------------------------------------
and for you --
congratulations! happy dance!
warning -- most babies look like wrinkled prunes when born ...but then they plump up (and some stay plumped up all their lives! -- don't I know!)
oh, pishaw...don't worry about what you're going to pass on to your baby -- except for love and memories and lots of TLC.
(and if IC means: Interstitial Cystitis....then your biggest worry if the baby gets it will probably be:
ok...need another bathroom in the house (unless racing each other to the bathroom also counts as exercise!) you've survived it, so.. what's the problem (well, yes...all the discomfort, but then you've survived it!)
now get busy...make baby announcements...send them out to the relatives (hmm...cookies??? with due date?...and in proper color if known?)
oh yes...and shop for the nursery...repaint/decorate, etc.
plan every b-day cake from birth to marriage and the wedding and grooms cakes too....and all the holiday treats for when you're room mom 
(! eek...so MUCH to do)
oh....and sleep...sleep...sleep....sleep...'cause the "baby-alarm" is going to keep you up, up, up many a nite once born!
it's going to be fine. you're going to be fine. the baby will be fine.
God Bless.
I have health issues too and let me say everything turned out just fine and more than likely so will your pregnancy too! Congrats on expecting, it is such an amazing moment in your life and please don't let your mother who seems to be being incredibly nasty at the moment ruin it for you! I would tell people who you KNOW will care and be just as excited as you are. This is a blessing for you both and also a wonderful time. Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!
clever_cakes311,
First of all, here's a BIG HUG!
Sorry, I don't know what IC stands for, but if you say it's a serious medical condition, I'm sure it is. However, you're being responsible and are seeing a physician early on in your pregnancy - so that base is covered.
Unfortunately, we can't make people behave/respond the way we think is appropriate. That being said, your Mom seems to be acting the way she always does when faced with life changes.
However, you are living your life with your husband, and taking your relationship to the next level.
How special and precious is the ability to create life - to make a family.
Neither you or your husband will ever be the same.
It's nothing like you ever imagined.
I've heard a baby described as "your heart living outside your body." It's so true....
I'm crying as I'm typing because I can't imagine my life without my children. I love them so much, and the grandbabies!
Life isn't neat and organized; I don't know that there's a perfect time to get pregnant. But you are and I'm so very, very happy for you and your hubby!
You and baby will be in my thoughts.
Jan
Nothing like the love of cake central to get you through the rough times! Ya'll are great! Doug, I think your post made me life so hard I almost cried. I guess that is a good idea, making announcements and sending them out to the family since obviously mom isn't going to do it.
Anyone out there want to be surrogate grandparents??
Well I didnt announce the baby till once she was born they come in your hospital room and take pics and offer you a great deal with the pics and the annoucments and what you want it to say. Its really nice. I just wanted to say that I had many health problems as well and was told by 4 doctors that I would never have a baby. Well when I got pregnanct it was a very trying time for me but all I could think of was how happy I was to break the odds and get pregnant and now she is a healthy 1 year old. Dont worry about anything you may pass one just think about how wonderful it will be to have a real family and just know that you will support your daughter or soon in anything they want to do. Oh yeah and dont worry about your age I am 20 parents thought I was crazy but I showed them my daughter had more things before she was born then I probably ever had in my life.
Tons of health problems here and I have a 3yr old and a 5yr old. Everyone tried to talk me out of it, pregnancies were ugly since I was on a huge dose of Prednisone but both kids were extremely healthy 6lbs 2oz and 7lbs 15oz.
I stopped after 2, the Prednisone made the last one's delivery a complicated nightmare and I was in unbelievable pain.
They are beyond worth it though!
Ulcerative Colitis here so we are looking to buy a bigger home with more bathrooms. Although it's supposedly not hereditary, it does run in families and I need my own bathroom anyways, even if neither of them ever have it.
First I just want to congratulate you!
Second, I don't know if anyone is every "ready" for a baby. I don't care how old you are. That's why God (or whatever higher power you believe in) give you nine months. that's so you kick it in gear and get "ready"
Enjoy every moment of your pregnancy it's supposed to be enjoyed. Best wishes and lots of luck and support!
edited to say nine months instead of nice...lol but the nine months are nice
Second, I don't know if anyone is every "ready" for a baby. I don't care how old you are. That's why God (or whatever higher power you believe in) give you nice months. that's so you kick it in gear and get "ready"
LOL I like that cocorum21.
C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S !!!
This is the second prenancy I'm 'hearing' of today and I'm jealous of course. I just loved being pregnant.....not the sleepless nights, and the pukes and all the other not so nice things afterwards. My kids are not babies anymore but when I look at them each day I realise how very fortunate I am to have them in my life.
My first three months I cried for just about everything and anything...blame it on the hormones. So, cry as much as you like and always remember that CC is here for you anytime.
HUGS
Congrats to you!!! and please don't this toxic person make feel bad!!!
I agree with everything that's been said in here!! We get enough worries when we first get pregnant without to have to think about this kind of person!!!
I agree with Doug send annoucements to your family!!! That would we so cool!!
**UPDATE**
So my mom may be starting to turn around. She answered some of my questions about pregnancy (really, I'm clueless. I've been looking up pregnancy terms online trying to learn all about it) Well, then I made some cute pregnancy announcements and said at the bottom "Be sure to call the new grandma-to-be and congratulate her!" 
Oh that'll really push her buttons....
Congrats Clever...
I had both of my daughters at a young age. Put it this way I had both of them and was married by the time I was 21. I am not only 22..lol..But I look at it this way age is nothing but a number. I get a lot of discriminating agianst because I look young and my poor husband looks about 17. I look around and feel that my babies are better taken care of then some people who have them at 40. I also think I am growing with them. When I was prego for my first daughter I wasn't happy at all. I always depressed and I was only 18 years old. My mom kept telling me you better be happy or your baby isn't going to be happy. Well she was right. My daughter was so collicy and I ended up getting a bad case of Postpartum Depression, which is the WORST thing I have ever been threw. With the second child I was extremely happy because I was having another little girl to play with and I already knew what to expect and she was the best newborn child ever. So the best advice I could give is to be HAPPY and your hubby will fall for the sick tricks the first time but not the second time...lol
Glad to hear about the about face with your mom. I'm glad you sent out the announcements. Go one step father, give yourself a (baby wisdom shower). New type of shower. Your invitations state that you need all the wisdom acquired from your guest about raising babies. In the invitation include a few index cards and ask them to write down the most valuable information that helped them with their babies. Get a decorative box that the index cards will go in and make sure their names are on the cards so that you can contact them if you have questions later. Don't be surprised if they also bring gifts.
Now, for your mother's attitude. When she starts putting you down again about your pregnancy just ask her when she got her Phd degree. She is probably jealous that you are doing what you want with your life and she doesn't have a say in it. Some people can not be happy unless they are making someonelse miserable. She might change and she might not. You should not let her put you, your husband, or you child in a negative light. Your doctors know your health problems and will advise you along the way. Be happy, don't stess out and remember there is a reason that you are a survivor.
Congratulations on your future family
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