that's bull. you do not have any obligation to go to a shower of some person who doesn't know you and wouldn't know if you were there or not. tell your hubby to shut his cake hole and not volenteer you for that crap any more. i'm now annoyed at him for you.
dang i have some serious pms.
i'm also one of those people that have a dream where my hubby's a jek and i'm still p-o'd at him when i wake up for a while.
i confess to kinda like the stupid games. of course we play some hilarious ones in my family. i do agree that the stupid games are not funny if you're not in a big, tight knit group like my loud family.
don't go. nuff said!
How's this for tacky....my SIL had a HUGE bridal shower in July of 2005...on the order of 100 guests. Of course she got all of the rediculously expensive things that she registered for. The marriage lasted exactly a year before she left him...in the brand new house they had just moved into about a month before! She moved back in with mom and dad, taking all of the furniture etc. and putting it in storage, and is still there a year later (she's 30 years old for crying out loud). Now she's pregnant to another guy, neither of them are divorced from spouse number one (his marriage lasted 7 months!) and my dear MIL is planning a combination bridal/baby shower 
Um....SIL has no plans to re-marry even after the first divorce is final but mom won't hear of it. I guess it's too embarrassing for her to have a grandbaby out of wedlock but not too embarrassing to actually be planning something like this! Can you imagine getting an invitation to such an event? TWO gifts! It wouldn't be so bad if she hadn't just had a bridal shower, but this scenario is beyond tacky. Gotta love those in-laws!
Heeheeheee! I know. This is nothing unusual for them. Another major social faux pas happened last summer....my three SIL's decided to throw the MIL a 60th birthday party. Sounds nice except that they invited everyone they knew (even though these people didn't know their mother), asked all of the guests to supply a covered dish since they're too cheap to actually have it catered and too lazy to cook for a party themselves, AND asked everyone to bring a gift since it was a birthday party! And people actually showed up with food and gift in hand! The three of them sat around the whole time drinking their beer while the guests set up the food and the tents. Some hostesses they are. Unbelieveable. I truly don't know how my significant other was spawned from these people....
I hate showers myself. I especially hate being the honoree, I just don't like attention all that much. I don't even like to be sung the happy birthday song on my birthday, (we just skip it all together). I was married and now I'm divorced but engaged to another man (love of my life BTW 
). He has never been married before but I absolutely refuse to let anyone throw me a shower even though his family is all for it. I will not have the same family and friends who bought me gifts for my first marriage buy even more the second time around. My plan is for me to give my bridesmaids a "thank-you-for-participating-in-our-special-day-luncheon" instead.
My best friend on the other hand is a little tacky. She is about to pop out her third girl and her mother has thrown her a shower for babies #2 and #3. I threw the shower for the first and that's where I drew the line. She registered and everything! Her mother got the invitations in the mail a whopping week before the wonderful event and we played stupid games, the whole 9 yards. Bleh. Here's a kicker...
She absolutely refuses to use hand-me-down anything but just last weekend she told me that she hopes my first child is a girl because she has so much stuff to give me that I won't have to purchase a thing for my child. Not that I wouldn't accept whatever she wanted me to have, I just wanted to say to her, "Hello Kettle this is Pot and you're black."
mjw15618-I've got a shower story to share.
One of my DH's very distance cousin's was getting married for the second time to a girl who was never married before. I got an invitation to the shower and was forced into going by my MIL.
Now, not only had I never met or heard of these people before but I they had declined to come to our wedding. My MIL made me go out shopping for the perfect gift with her the weekend before and was upset that we didn't want to spend more than $50 on people I have never met before. But, that is another story.
Anyway, we went and it was a formal sit down, catered luncheon. On the first course there was a piece of blue cheese that looked like and walnut so I ate it not realizing. I am deathly allergic to blue cheese and started going into anaphalatic shock. I try to tell my MIL , who is sitting next to me, that I am dying. My throat was closing up and I was passing out. She ignored me. I guess she thought I was kidding. Finally, as I slumped in my chair, the MOB realized that something was wrong. She gets me an epi pen and saves my life. My MIL just laughed the whole time. It was a weird reaction on her part but I think she felt badly that she hadn't figured out what I was talking about. Anyway, so after I nearly die of blue cheese and embarresment, we go ahead with the rest of the shower.
A couple of months pass and we never get a wedding invitation. Aparently they never even got married. Nope, they didn't send back the gift either.
So from now on, I refuse to go to showers, I just send a gift
Wow... I've been to a total of 2 wedding shower in my life and hosted 1 baby shower. And none of these had more than 20 people and the baby shower was co-ed. One wedding shower was hosted by a lady not even invited to the wedding and the other was attended by all the mother's friends who didn't even know the bride.
I never knew they could get that big (I have a close small group of friends and am a family outcast so....) Just the sheer thought of someone asking for a Big Screen TV is outrageous to me. The thought that people register makes me laugh - it is such a ply to get more gifts!!
It is like the Doe and Buck (did I get that right) parties (fundraisers) that are popular in eastern canada, in my mind, not only do people get to buy a wedding gift, a shower gift, and a but are also supposed to support the couple in paying for the wedding.... sigh. I guess I'm a cheap 26 year old!
The only positive side of big parties is that they need big cakes... and we make bigger money 
Oh... and can anyone answer the question if it is common for parents of bride and groom to invite their friends to the wedding even if they've never met the couple? My one friend had to bump her guest list up to accomodate all her parent's friends!
Oh... and can anyone answer the question if it is common for parents of bride and groom to invite their friends to the wedding even if they've never met the couple? My one friend had to bump her guest list up to accomodate all her parent's friends!
It's not uncommon if the parents are somewhat influential, or have high ranking jobs with a lot of personal relationships with business associates.
My husband and I were invited a wedding like this. Hubby was "up-there" in bank mgmt and another "up there" co-workers's daughter was getting married. We went to the wedding because he had a close, personal relationship with the parent.
However, the story turns out to be funny! When we got to the church, I saw 2 of my great aunts there! Turns out I was related to the bride and didn't know it! 
I love showers! I think it's all so much fun. Maybe it's because every shower I've attended is for friends or family who are all awesome. We are all laid-back and bend over for other people. It's the country and the etiquette of the area. I've never heard of showers with 50 people. That's crazy! Now, my family usually has co-ed bridal showers so that means at least 30 people attend. I also love the games. I think they're so much fun but I hate the toilet paper game. For some reason, though, all my friends love it. 
I enjoy throwing them, buying the gifts, and eating! In fact, everyone I know thrives off them. In fact, I'm getting ready to throw one and I can't wait! Maybe it's just where I'm from. Or maybe I'm just young! 
This past May, I gave a wedding shower for my nephew and his soon to be wife. I sat them down and told them that I had given my SIL a wedding shower when she and my brother got married and now I was offering a shower to them, (nephew and fiance'). I told them I was giving a couples shower and that they could invite whoever they wanted. Well, they came back to me with a list that was about 75 people. Their wedding was about 200 people. I told them that I was editing the list down to about 30 people because that was as many as my house would hold comfortably. Then, they told me that they wanted me to put in the invitations that they were regisitered at Bed & Bath, Linnens & Things and Target and they would gladly welcome gift cards from Lowes, Home Depot and Walmart and especially Best Buy. They also had another registery for expensive china and silverware that they wanted me to include. I chose to only state in the invitation that they had registered at Target, Linnens and Bed and Bath. I also refused to play games at the shower. Now as showers go, I would have to say that it was a hit. I had two types of punch, one was a regular fruit punch and the other was an alcoholic punch. Guess which one was consumed first and I had made a double batch. By the time they were married, I think they had four other showers given by different people and yes, they invited me to the other showers. I guess they had no idea how much expense goes into giving a shower with all the food and invitations and decorations. I put out a full spread so that nobody goes hungry and that there is something that just about anyone will enjoy. I love cooking for other people, so once in a while fixing an assortment of dishes is actually enjoyable.
Now, my son is getting married next May and would you believe that they really do not want a shower. They say they feel weird registering at stores, because they don't want to look greedy. 
Did anyone see the Bridezilla this season where the bride only picked rich people to come to her wedding. She said she expected at least a $50 gift from everyone. What is wrong with people?
My friend just got married and sadly she put down Kitchen Aid mixers and a Playstation and such. I hate when people do that because they do come off greedy. When registering, the lady actually said to put stuff like this down. They also registered for just about everything (even exercise balls, etc.) because of the same reason. They were afraid people would run out of things to buy. At least, that's what the lady told them at the store.
Therefore, I think a lot of this outrageous registry stuff comes down to pressure from the stores to sell their items. Naive bride and grooms fall for it (and I know there are tons of them from reading the posts).
aswartzw-Yes! I saw that episode of Bridezilla and when the bride said that my husband started yelling at the tv. I couldn't believe there are people out there that would think that way.
About a playstation being on a registry........I am speechless!!!! What is the world coming to?! People have really become greedy.
I wish more people would focus on pre-maritial counselling and less on what they can get from the shower or the wedding. A good foundation for a marriage will last longer than anything you could ever get at a shower.
I've got a good registry one.
My maternal grandmother's family is HUGE and my great grandmother is still living. Until she went blind she would crochet doilies for gifts, she doesn't have much money and has almost 100 great-grandkids. Well one of the great granddaughters was getting married and they had a "bathroom" shower where they sent out invitations telling people which gift to get the bride. Great grandma got one telling her to buy red hand towels and she was MAD, she said that she was going to give what she normally did and they could put it in the bathroom if they wanted.
mjw, my aunt didn't throw a shower before my cousin decided to get married but she was terribly embarassed that her daughter moved in with a guy without being married. She is very religious and had been saying for years that they were raising their kids right and all the kids would enter into marriage pure so she started telling everyone that my cousin was getting married in the spring to cover her embarassment a little. Since the cousin wasn't living close she didn't hear about it for a while but she chewed her mom out and then the aunt had to live with having told people this when daughter didn't get married for at least another year after the projected wedding date.
I think I know which bride you are speaking of on Bridezillas. I am ashamed to say that she is from the same area that I am from in north Texas, we maybe live 15 miles apart. I've never met her or seen her in public or anything but as the show was following her around, I always knew exactly what part of north Texas she was in. That was the only fascinating thing about her episodes to me. Other than that I always wanted to smack that smug smirk right off her face. Believe me when I say that most people I know from this area have a little more charm and tact than that chickface has!
I watch Bridezillas all the time (as much as their behavior ticks me off) because I just can't tear my eyes away from it and, I always pray that there will be at least a brief shot of the cake of course. I'm always in shock at how they act. I just hope that maybe, just maybe it's all an act once the cameras are turned on and when they go back to watch "their" episode they are very ashamed of themselves. Probably not though. Even if they don't act like that on a regular basis that behavior is pulled from somewhere inside and there is always the potential that they could go postal at any given moment. SCARY!!! This season's brides seem especially bloody awful if you ask me. I wonder if the producers ask them to turn on the angry demands so that they have something to work with once it's time for editing. Probably not though.
Re: Bridezilla (or any other "reality" show) ... it's amazing how low people will go and how they will degrade themselves for a free trip or their 15 minutes of fame.
I can't help but wonder how these people are going to feel 20 years from now watching their antics.
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