Another Cake Decorator Talking Bad.......vent
Decorating By gibson Updated 26 Sep 2006 , 2:00am by Derby
I really need to vent.........
I was doing a follow up call with one of my customers (is a repeat customer and just told me they will never buy another cake from our local store! Yaaayyyyy! 
) (the playstation cake and disney princess cakes I've done for her and will be doing her wedding cake next summer). Anyways, she told me that she got a phone call from another lady in town who does cakes and was wondering if she had anyone doing her wedding cake. My customer said yes and the "other" cake decorator asked who it was. She told her it was me. The other cake cake decorator then started to say not so nice things about me. Thankfully my customer told her that she was not worried and has complete faith in me. I tell you, my mouth hit the floor! I have never said a bad word about this women! I even told her that if I ever got to busy I would refer people to her.....definately not anymore! 
Her husband works at the local recenter and has access to who books the hall for weddings and such and then goes home and tells his wife and then she calls whoever booked the hall to see if they need a cake done. I really don't agree with this, I am a member of our chamber of commerce and have a business license (I think she has a business license too but she is not a member of the chamber) but because her husband works at the recenter (not even in that department he takes care of the ice arena and thats it!) he looks and sees who has the hall booked. Maybe it's just me but I don't think it's right.
My customer told me that a while back (before me) she ordered a cake from this lady and was charged quite a bit and was not happy with the cake at all. It was a bowling theme and she did half a bowling pin and half a ball. She didn't even make it 3D! I didn't ask the price but my customer was not happy at all with it.
This lady doesn't even know how to make flowers! She wanted me to teach her!!! Not anymore!!! You couldn't pay me enough to teach her!
I am so mad! All I keep telling myself is that I can do better work than her and I'm the one becoming a Wilton instructor (I'm so excited I'm leaving on Thursday! 
).
I don't know if I should leave this alone or if I should contact the rec center and let them know this is happening. I don't want to be petty or anything and I wouldn't have really cared before but because she's not "playing" nice maybe I shouldn't either! (but I don't want to sink to her level either!) I'm just worried about what else she's saying about me.
Just had to vent, sorry it's long!
I don't know if I should leave this alone or if I should contact the rec center and let them know this is happening.
I wouldn't contact the rec center...have your friend do it. Seems to me the right to privacy has been broken.
Don't fret about what she's saying about you. What goes around comes around.
I would definitely take action. Not to get revenge (because that is not the right way to look at it, in my opinion). It seems that this woman is slandering you. I think what I would do, initially is contact this woman myself. May it clear to her in no uncertain terms, and in a nice calm voice, that you have information that she is calling people from a list that her husband has at work. And furthermore, that she is talking about you and attempting to ruin your reputation as a cake decorator and business owner. I would not argue with her or even give her a chance to rebut, I would just calmly tell her that you don't appreciate it and that you WILL contact the rec center and an attorney if she doesn't stop. Period.
Take time to think about what you're going to say. Don't react but be proactive and take the bull by the horns on this one. I hope this takes care of your problem (her). Things like this are just so uncalled for.
Bleh people like that are so annoying!
If it were me, I'd leave it alone, as far as calling the center. I believe one of the best things to have people say about me is to have them remember me as someone "who never says anything bad about anyone." Even when every one else is hacking on someone, I'd rather be the one who didn't. 
Not that I always am...but I keep it mind as a goal.
Plus, if she's that type of person--she'll only say worse things about you and more often, if you step in.
AND I think most people would rather not do business with someone who is catty and slanders people without reason.
On the rec center thing, oh well. It's a pretty tacky way to get business, what she's doing. Most customers like to have a choice, and they also like word of mouth referrals. All she needs is a few more unhappy, overcharged customers working "for" her, and you won't need to worry about her "stepping in" too much more.
If she's said things that are really unfounded and unbelievable, and you really want to settle it, call her personally and confront her. As in, "If you have something to say to me, you need to say it now or be quiet."
That's all I have to say about that...
Let us know "the rest of the story" 
You have SO much more dignity than this lady does, and apparently you're much more talented too! 
It's one thing to advertise a business and let people make their own decisions, but it's quite another to solicit business by snooping and then calling people to be nosy. That's just not good business practice. If I were the bride and someone called me out of the blue asking questions about who was doing my cake, and then making obviously very childish remarks about the (more mature) decorator because their toes had been stepped on, that is the LAST person on the PLANET I would have do my cake!
This irritates ME and I don't have anything to do with it! Ughhh I just want to slap people like that.
I agree with LilBlackSheep - if your customer is willing, she should call the rec center and speak with the manager. Have the customer ask if it is rec center policy to give out the names and numbers to people who hold events there. Tell them who called and they'll figure out which employee is invading her privacy.
Or maybe you could work with the rec center to become a "referral." When someone books an event, maybe they can hand out your card with the contract??
I don't know if I would confront the "other" decorator - you may just start an all-out war. I wouldn't, however, refer any business to her or help her out any way!
I would definitely say something to her about the comments she made about you; if you don't, she'll continue to do it. I'd do it in person, too.
Is the rec center registry public information? If not, I see a conflict of interest there. If it is, I'd start checking it out each week so that you can contact the brides, too!
I would think carefully and wait a period of time before doing anything. Right now you are running on emotion and when we try to deal with some sitations when running on emotions we can make them worse not meaning to.
I would not contact this lady yet. What you have is hearsay, and if she is doing this now I really don't see her stopping, especially is the conversation ends in threats either way.
Would the lady that you talked with be willing to approach the recenter about the situation? Did she give them permission to give out her information to anyone? If not, she has a better chance getting something done there. The people that run the recenter need to know that someone is getting information from their books. It may mean they need to put the books up somewhere where not your average joe can look in them.
Does the recenter offer a package deal? Maybe you can talk with them about handing out your card or information to the brides to be. Let them get your infromation first. And if the place is willing out that information it shows that they trust you, and so should the bride to be. You can always make up a flyer that had pictures of some of your cakes as well as testamonies from past brides or people you have done cakes for.
If this lady is making up lies about you, she is a sad person. It could be she is jealous of your work, or just not sure of her own work. She doesn't think or feel that she can compete with your cakes on an honest, fair level.
If you do feel the need to contact her in the future, do not call her. I would send her a letter, not even an email, but a letter. Keep a copy of it for yourself. Be honest and use facts in the letter. Tell her you have heard from one of your customers that she said so and so, and that you would appreciate her not doing that. Don't be ugly or rude in the letter. If you show anger or she perceives anything you say as a threat, she will feed off that and more than likely it will not go well.
I wouldn't talk to her via the phone either. If she feels the need to contact you I would get it in writing. That away if this does go further, god forbid, you have prove of what you said and what she said.
Personally, if I had a random phone call from someone trying to drum up my business . . . and I figured she got my info from the rec hall I had rented . . . I would be placing a VERY angry phone call to the company. Her hubby is definitely crossing a line . . . unless the wife has a conract with the rec center.
If I were in your shoes though . . . I would place a kindly worded call to the office at the rec center. Ask them politely if they have anyone they have contracted to use for cakes. If they say no . . . mention, thats odd then . . . because on of my customers just recieved a phone call from so and so and her information was obtained from your hall specifically.
Sometimes being super sweet and playing innocent lil ol me is the easier way to get things done . . . . my honey loved it when I did this with the contractors who remodeled our house. I sure got a lot of stuff done/fixed ASAP using this method . . . sometimes batting an eyelash is the least stressful way to deal with people. 
just ignore the nasty comments because you ARE BETTER than her and than that, But (and this is a strong BUT) have your client call the hall and report this. This is called Slander and on top of it is a horrid business practice to have. The hall needs to know for your sake and other decorators sakes!
Don't sink to her level. It will truly pay off for you. Obviously it is paying off for you. You've gotten a wedding cake order that she thought she was going to get and you are becoming a Wilton instructor.
Her comments about you will bite her in the butt.
I guess I can be ''hot headed'' at times. My reaction would be to ask your customer to call the center & ask why her name & number were given out and about the call from 'so & so'.
After she does that for you, I would ask her if she would stand behind you when you contact your attorney. Slander should never be allowed.
That woman is just a nasty, bitter person and I wouldn't let her get away with it.
Just my 2 cents!! Good Luck
Gibson, I'd have to agree with the majority about dealing with this lady. Your customer was called and solicited. That is a violation of reccenter policy, I am sure, I would have your client call and complain to the manager of the center. The ice rink guy has no right to go into the other departments to get names and number for his wife. He has NO REASON to go into another persons department, unless the person in charge of the hall allows him to, and then thats another whole can of worms. In any event, you should not call the center yourself.
As far as this decorator is concerned, remember, she has to go fishing for clients. Advertising and fishing are sooo different and you don't need to fish because your cakes speak for themselves. Don't lower yourself to her level, but if you h\\should ever happen to bump into her on the streets just calmly look into her eye and hock a big lugie right into it!
Debbi
I wouldn't worry about this to much. The woman is must be desperate for business if she'd solicit orders. I bet it ticked her off to have your client tell her that she has full confidence in you as a decorator. After that I bet she'll think twice before badmouthig you to someone else. However, if it happened again I'd be confronting her nicely and let her know you know what she's doing and it'd better stop. I bet her mouth hits the floor then! You do beautiful work! I wouldn't worry about the likes of her.
Wow, these members are tough!
My opinion is the same as most - your client's privacy was violated, and she should be the one to report her privacy being violated. As far as this other decorator and her husband, they are both guilty of conspiracy, libel, and slander, and I would seek the advice of an attorney. Even if all he does is write a threatening letter, it's worth the hundred bucks to shut them up. If it continues, then you have grounds for suit.
Theresa
Thank you all for your support and great advice! I would love to ask my client to call the reccenter and complain but don't know if she would do that. How do you ask someone to do that? I don't want to compromise our relationship either.
I am going to talk to the reccenter manager about putting some of my brochures (that were made my on of the CC members here and she rocks!) at the reccenter so when the brides are booking the hall they can have my brochure. They also hold birthday parties there so I will be talking to that department as well. If she wants a war she's got one! LOL!I think that will be enough of a shock to the other decorator. She would never do brochures or business cards for that matter. I will try to be the better person but if it gets any worse or if I hear anything else I will be confronting her personally. She lives 2 houses down from my inlaws. I will handle myself well and with confidence when confronting her! I will be working very hard to make sure my name gets out there. I am becoming a member of the arts council and have donated a cake for their craft fair (which I am also attending and raffling off another cake for a door prize - my name will be heard by all! LOL!) that they will raffle off and keep all funds. I will keep you all posted if anything else should happen.
Thanks again, I'm really glad I can turn to you all!
Yeah, I think the hall should know what their employee is doing. That is illegal to disclose information about the people (phone, adress, etc.). You could get him in a lot of trouble.
As for the decorator, she sounds like a lot of the old school cake decorators I have met, that think they are God's gift to cakes and think everyone else has no clue.
Has anyone else noticed that some cake decorators are just nasty people!!!!!!!!
Okay, I went and talked to the reccenter guy and asked him if it was public knowledge he said he couldn't see why it was a problem for anyone to know so if I wanted I could ask the girls to see the book. Now the phone numbers and address's are not public knowledge. I never said anything about the other cake decorator. I also asked him about putting some brochures out and he said it wasn't problem and he would also give me a recommendation I could put in the brochure.
I also found out that the chamber of commerce had an open house and didn't contact me for the cake but contacted the "not so nice" decorator. I was fuming that they didn't use me because I'm a new member to the chamber! I talked to him and he aplogized profusely (I was very nice about it) and will keep me in mind for any future events.
I'm so discouraged even though it all sounds so positive I'm thinking it's all political.....I could be wrong though!
just fyi - in most cases names and addresses and phone numbers are considered public information (meaning it is something you could just look up yourself anyway like on the Internet or in a phone book) and not subject to privacy laws. Not saying this is true in this case, but it could be.
You have a valid point, jmt1714, but unless I read incorrectly, this other cake decorator knew that the person who was calling was getting married, and specifically tried to solicit business from her. The only way she could obtain that information is from her husband.
Theresa
I wouldn't call the rec center, yet. But, I would call the other decorator and set up a lunch "appointment" stating that you would like to discuss potential cake decorating with her. Then meet with her face to face and tell her in no undercertain terms that you will not tolerate her negative behavior. I would stand your ground and tell her that you have no intention of badmouthing her to anyone, however, if you hear of her badmouthing you again, that you will contact the rec center and bring it to their attention what her husband is doing and that it may be violating privacy laws.
GOOD LUCK WITH WHATEVER HAPPENS!!
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