I think the one thing we all need to keep in mind here is we all have different levels of experience on this site. There are people on her posting their 1st cake and people posting their 1000th cake, of course their is a difference in the appearance.

Everyone of us has our own unique decorating style. I have been decorating for at least 15 yrs, but I specialize mainly in doing sheet cakes (I am branching out, but sheet cakes are my comfort zone and it is what most people in my area are looking for). there are others on here that specialize in fondant cakes (which I am in complete awe of - you guys are amazing, truly inspirational!)

I am an admitted comment junkie...I love to receive comments on my cakes. But it can be hurtful if you receive criticism when you are not looking for it. If I have a cake that I am not happy with, I always add in the description when I post "constructive criticism welcome". That doesn't mean I want someone to tell me my cakes look like crap (which somedays, I feel they might - being hard on myself here!). That means if you see something I could improve on, please let me know.

I'm not sure PMing someone with "how to" tips would always be welcomed. The newer decorators need our encouragement, none of us started out on the level where we are now.

I don't know if this has been said or not, but when I see a cake that's "not that great"...I try to look for something they really did great on the cake.


If I can't find anything to comment about, I simply don't comment......after looking through their photos to see if they're a new decorator; but.......BUT a lot of the time I've seen people say this is my first time with fondant or my first time with fbct or my first time baking ever......and it's absolutely wonderful!

It really does hurt me to think that I have upset anyone on here. As I said I NEVER wanted to do that. In fact that was the furthest thing from my mind.

When I said "sad" cake I was thinking of my own cakes not anyone here. What I was thinking was "I wonder if everyone just posts nice things about my cakes to make me feel better or if they really mean it".

Seeing how everyone said they would never tell anyone their cake is bad (because no cake is bad) was nice to see. I know I've never seen a cake here (besides my own) that I thought the person was so bad they couldn't get better. I mean we all can get better. Even the person who is the best on this forum can get better. Gee I wonder who would be picked as best here since there are so many super great decorators. I doubt if we could pick just one.

I think what we all need (me mostly) is to look at our work and be happy with what we can do. As time goes on and we practice more we know we will get better. Some of us (me) will never be one of the great pro decorators but who cares. As long as we have fun, enjoy what we do then we have just as much right to be proud of our cakes as the next person.

When someone is rude (my sister) just say "Well it's a good thing this cake is not being given/sold to you then" and carry on.

Not everyone is brave enough to even try to make a cake let alone spend the hours, money and hard work to get better. So unless they do I don't think they have a right to speak a word to us unless of course it is in praise.

Joanne

Joanne,

Sweetie, your cakes are all very good. Some of them are even FANTASTIC!!! I don't think anyone was offended by your comments. Sometimes we all have cakes that are not quite as we hoped. But you are right. No cake will ever be perfect and we are our own worst critic. And for petes sake, if Collette Peters can find flaws in her cakes.....then I will never make a 'perfect' cake!

You have the right attitude about your sister. Just let her think what she wants and move on. She don't like it, she don't have to eat it! My mom used to always have some comment to make about my home decorating choices. She was a big fan of off-white and beige for walls. I LOVE COLOR!!! She was always saying things like, "Well I wouldn't do it that way." or "Gee, don't you think that is a bit much?". I would just smile and say, "That's okay! You don't have to like it since you don't live here."

After a few years, ok several years, of that she got the hint and quit critiquing my house. And guess who has a Purple master bath, sage green kitchen and a terra cotta orange laundry room at her house now ?! Guess I wasn't so crazy after all!

Now, go make yourself another awesome cake and feel better!

Definitely NOT offended here!

And personally speaking, I have never left a "pity" compliment, if I typed it I meant it! There is beauty in every cake on this site!

okay, i had two thoughts going on at once in my previous post. i don't think you should be blunt with someone if there cake is "sad", hence, the "if you don't have anything nice to say" but i do believe in constructive critisism.

I remember posting something similar a long time ago that stirred up controversy....but I took the opposite view. I thought that even if there is a "sad-looking" cake, try to find at least one nice thing about it, and make a comment. When I first started, I really looked for encouragement on these boards to keep going. I got it, and am so grateful for it, because it helped developed the confidence to get better.
I don't think people should lie, or be phony, but one could always try to see the bright side of a cake, even if its: "I like the color you chose for that border". The fact that you are leaving out, "...but the rest of the cake is a total disaster" is ok. We are all human, and we all need to hear good things from time to time.
I don't think people should spend all their time commenting on bad cakes either, but if you run across one once in a while, wouldn't hurt to point out at least one good thing on the forsaken thing!!

I think I've done a little bit of everything - the thing we gotta remember sometimes when a picture comes up - it might be someone posting to the "ugly cake" forum that can't seem to attach their picture so they put it in their portfolio!!!

I don't comment on cakes that I think are really bad..... but if there is something good about the cake and I can say something, I will. I have also left some little "tips" every now and then - which I guess I could just PM instead.... like "I love this cake - I think it would be really cool if you had added purple as well w/ the color scheme but overall I love it!" - I hope that hasn't ever offended anyone! It was just another "idea" that I was sharing.... guess i can share it somewhere else.

I've only had one really nasty comment on a cake - I posted one cake and got an e-mail that someone had "commented on my pic" and I got all excited- then when I got to the page the person had written "that is the ugliest cake I have ever seen - those colors are hideous!" I mean, I understand some color schemes aren't going to be everyone's cup of tea.... but I DID write in my description that it was a very last minute cake that I did for FREE and I pointed out my own mistakes, etc.... so it wasn't like I was posting it and the title was "THE BEST CAKE EVER"...... I knew it had some flaws but that comment really riled me up - if you DON'T have something nice to say - just don't comment. If you do have some CONSTRUCTIVE criticsm, I wouldn't mind it - if someone had said "not my type of color scheme but the bow came out really good - I think maybe if you used _____ color instead next time, it would turn out even better!" - THAT I could have dealt with.....

The worst part is that the comment was someone who had NEVER posted another thing on this site and they NEVER posted any pics.... it was like a new person who just joined and then left a nasty comment and left.... so I couldn't PM her and tell her to keep her nastiness to herself and if she had something CONSTRUCTIVE to say, I was all ears.........but I deleted the picture along w/ her comment and then just uploaded it again YEAH for the delete feature!

If someone is asking for opinions then I give mine. It might be positive or negative but Ill be sure to word it properly as to not hurt the feelings of the original poster. But Im not going to lie. Ive seen a lot of these ego booster threads and frankly I dont care for them, generally because I dont notice Im posting on one until its too late. Im sure its because my home away from home on the internet is a debate board where your brutal honesty is expected at all times. Its a much different environment here, much more chipper and happy so sometimes I forget to put on my think nice hat and I just lay it all out there. Its not until I realize that everyone on the thread has posted something nice about the cake in question except for myself that I realize what kind of thread Im on. And then I feel like a complete jerk.

This is sort of like that does this make me look fat question everyone runs from. Do you tell the truth and hope not to be flamed beyond recognition or do you lie and let you beloved walk around looking about 20lbs heavier than they should? Id prefer the truth so just for future reference if I ever ask for opinions on a cake I expect brutal honesty!!! Besides how will I ever learn to correct my mistakes if none are ever pointed out? Or when I complain about the obvious ones people come running with lies and sugar coated suggestions. My opinion is just be honest.

The unspoken rule on my debate board is if you dont want honest opinions dont ask for them. But if you do dont get upset and offended when someone gives you theirs and it isnt completely positive. Of course one should always be considerate when offering up an opinion. There's giving an opinion and then there's just being plain mean.

Personally, I post my 'new decorator pictures' just to keep the level of decorating down!
NO one will look at MINE and be intimidated! They'll say "MAN, if she had the guts to post THAT, mine will look GREAT!"

7yyrt-

T

ROFL You crack me up!

BTW--Love your little palm tree cookie! Makes me want a sugar cookie. On a beach. Far away from here!

I think it's ok to give critcism IF someone has asked for an honest critique and IF your comments are genuinely meant to help and be constructive and IF your work is along the lines of the person's who you're commenting about. For example my work is pretty different and I would appreciate comments from anyone who liked or worked in that style, but someone who makes very delicate flowery wedding cakes would probably think my work a bit OTT - in which case their comments may not be so helpful to me as they might not 'get' my style. If I see a cake that's not so good I don't feel the need to say anything at all unless someone deliberately pm'd me to ask me, I would keep schtum. I'm a teacher by profession and you need a relationship with someone to really help them with criticism.

I agree with the original poster. I think that many of my cakes as sad, but I am my worst (or next worst) critic. My husband is in the running for the worst for me. I know that I could have done better but I always procratinate on making my cakes. So that the sad look is for me. I haven't posted any pictures here yet. Have to do some reading on how to do that. But I do teach the WM way and can and will use incourging words for othere who ask. I don't think I have here but in class I do all the time. I have never told a student that their cakes are sad. Because they are learning something new. I my self love to learn new sugar art all the time. I have yet to perfect any. Even BC. I dabble in all sugar art. Master of none. So sad can be used for my cakes by me and any other who wishes too. It won't hurt my feelings if I ask for imput.

Joanne,
I think your cakes are great. I have an older sister who wouldn't say anything good to me if I was painted in 14kt gold with eyes made of diamonds. I have come to realize her opinions are like bottoms some should never be seen or heard.
As far as the "sad" cake comment. No matter how you word it some people are going to get defensive. That is their insecurity.
I haven't posted pictures because my cakes to me look horrible. I am practicing to get better. My customers tell me they love them. I have to be confident in my work to post a picture; I'm not there yet. Stop worrying about others opinions. If you love your cakes; that's what matters. If someone wants an honest opinion & they ask me; they should be prepared to accept what I think. So, if I persoanlly don't like a cake; I don't post.