hoping to find some other cake lovers with issues like mine...
Dad is in in-patient alcohol rehab, and I am having major issues with his release, and my role in the process... seeing a therapist, but think my fellow CC'rs would have some positive advice.
anyone else dealing with major family issues that seem to be interfering with your passion for cake?? And your role as a good wife?? (no kids yet, but hoping for the future) Guilty feelings for putting cake business above all else.
Maybe a post for another forum.. but I feel a strong support group happening here.
any adivce would be welcome,
xoxo
SB
It sounds like you're going through a lot right now. Here's a (((hug)))! My only advice is to take care of what's the most important to you. For me, cake is a hobby, but sometimes it is therapeutic to just work on a cake and feel like I am accomplishing something.
My family is is having really tough time right now too. I have 1 grandmother who was just diagnosed with cancer and my other grandmother is having heart problems and mini strokes. My dad is dealing with depression. My brother's girlfriend just had a baby and it has been in the hospital for 2 months. In the meantime, he is trying to get his life together and get off all drugs/ alcohol. It's a 14 hour drive to get home to see them. We're dealing with the fact that we've been trying to have a baby for 3 years now and are going to have to see a specialist that is a 6 hour drive from where we live.
What has gotten me through the stress is God and my husband. Prayer changes things and people. Be open and honest with your husband about what you're feeling and also listen to him when he shares his feelings.
We'll be praying for you and your family!
Jennifer
At least he went into rehab. My MIL has never gone into rehab and is getting worse with her drinking as she gets older. She is losing weight because her drinking is more important to her than eating a meal. None of her children want to confront her about her problem, so they do nothing except shrug their shoulders. My way of dealing with her, (I live next door) is to put my dh and ds first. We do not go over to visit if she is drunk or drinking. No holidays together until after she sleeps it off. So my only advise is they live their life with their choices and you live your life with your family first. Give him credit for at least getting help, just don't let him drag you into his problems. Be there to listen, just don't enable. Okay, off my soap box. Good Luck
It might sound mean but you can't put your life on hold, you do need to spend time doing what's best for YOU.
I stay out of my parents lives for the most part because of my father's drinking, that man is functional enough that he's never going to seek treatment because he can fool himself into thinking he doesn't have a problem. My mother knows that forcing him to go won't really help if he doesn't think he has a problem but she has managed to get him to cut back (once he starts he can't quit).
I understand how you feel...my Gma has had several mini strokes and is in rehab now and has several mental things going on. She has been diagnosed with Sundowner's Syndrome and calls me several times a day to tell me I have to come and get her straight.
Every day, every call, the same questions: Who put me here? Why am I here? When am I going home? and my personal favorite conversation with Gma is about bathroom habits. I feel so guilty b/c every time the phone rings and I see her number, I feel my temper start to rise, want to eat anything and everything and just let it go to voice mail. I have had 32 calls in one hour from her. Not to mention the ones at 2:00, 2:03, 2:08, 2:15...in the AM because she can't find the nurse's button and "you have to come here and find it for me!"
So I guess I use my cakes to escape all that. I am good about visiting most of the week but by Thurs/Fri. I am cakin' and can't get by.
I feel ya! Cake is therapy! Maybe that's how you work through your stress. Your escape. Makin' em and eatin' em. I know it's mine along with sewing. (Unfortunately I couldn't have picked hobbies that were not so messy.) Sounds to me like you have a lot on your plate. My father is an alcoholic who also smokes marijuana regularly and is married to a young lady who has very serious mental health issues (she has 2 kids). They live in absolutely deplorable sp? conditions (by their own choice, the house was nice before they moved into it) and have 2 sweet G-ma's whom I love dearly but since I am a nurse I make regular trips to look at "growths" and talk bowels. I just remind myself of a better time when I was younger and with them and realize that they won't be around forever. As for my Father I gave up on that years ago after several attempts to be a part of his life. I said to hell with it, I tried. All you can do is try and deal with it the best way you know how. Keep your chin up hon. (((Hug)))
Yes AuntieElle--
I am a physical therapist assistant and anything medical, everybody comes running to me. I have tried to convince my mom and aunt that LTC is Gma's best option but they are not willing to go that far yet.
But I am looking forward to the convention and have 5 FREE days from the telephone.
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