Alright i totally had a bad feeling about this one from the start. I met this person back in April. we scheduled to meet at 11:00am and a location, i showed up 15mins early like i always do,to find them sitting at the table waiting alreadying, when i asked if they were waiting long, they said "our appointment was at 10" (i totally had my agenda in my lap and wrote down the time, and recited it back to her when i was on the phone with her. whatever.) I apologised.
When we were on the phone I also said that i would be bringing samples, asked her what she'd liek to try. She said cake wasn't really her thing, i directed her to my website... for a list of flavours, and insisted, they must be something that she likes. ok, we agreed on 2 flavours, thats all she wanted to try. plus truffle samples.
ok by the end of the meeting, i gave a steal of a deal, with a wedding cake, tortes and individual cake favours. not truffles.. she still took the truffle samples. fine.
I contacted her at the end of june (her wedding is 2nd week in august) to remind her i still needed picture of her and the grrom for their topper..
she sends me them, and says she wants to meet as she wants to sample torte flavours. alright. i tell her i can provide her with 2 -5" tortes complementry.
Plus she wants to try wedding cake flavours... ????? i gave her smaples at the first meeting in april ????
she calls me tonight at 9pm, I am a home based business but... honestly??? 9pm. i have a family. and leaves a msg, yeah you gave us cupcake samples... we want to try wedding cake flavours. (???)
I call her back and explain, I do my samples in the form of cup cakes to give people an idea of what the cake will be like. she says, "well, to be honest i didn't like those flavours you gave us and i want to try the tortes, cos i want to make sure i will like them, cos everyone has their own taste"
"and i want to try wedding cake flavours" WHAT????
i feel a bit insulted, but i guiess not everyone is going to like all my flavours, but seriously. she said to me in the begining that she didn't really care too much about the cake flavour anyways... now 2 weeks before the wedding we have another meeting to try MORE cake flavours??? why didn't she tell me she didn't like them in APRIL??? i am sick to my stmach over this. i have a feeling she's "honeslty not like the tortes" and want to try more, and more.. ya know what i mean???
what do i do.. she gave me a deposit in april for $100 because her mom liked the price.
i directed her back to my website to view the flavours, and she souldn't stunned on the phone.. i have typical flavours listed.. vanilla, chocolate.. lemon.. the i get into fancy onces.. what is the problem here. 2 weeks before the wedding in the contract, everything is suppose to be CONFIRMED. maybe i should have followed up sooner... but. it was almost 2 months before the wedding when i asked about the pictures...
please help me.. i want to say forget it, and give her her deposit back but its $1000... order. thats a big one for me. :\\
I would probably tolerate her idiocy for $1000......but I feel your pain. If you feel like this will be a huge train-wreck and she will dislike the cake (or act like she does) to get a refund, you might want to give her $$ back. She sounds like a bit of a 'zilla..........
2 weeks before the wedding and you have nothing confirmed?
If it's your policy to return the money...I would send her a certified money order , signed reciept requested mail and let her go.
No matter what you charged her if she is a Bridezilla, you are going to feel cheated.
Let her run her game on someone else, you gave her enough samples.
Maybe there should be a change in your website, "first samples are free"
"Other samples available at 4", 5" 6" pricing"
Why would you be turning on your oven , investing time and ingredients and not get paid????
$1000 for how many servings? that makes a difference!
she sounds difficult. you should be helpful, but also put your foot down..
with that...instead of telling her what you cant do, tell her what you can do. also, give her a deadline and be serious. she needs to make her mind up, and fast. as in the next day or two, and she should also pay the remainder when you finalize it...dont wait until the wedding to collect. make a contract and get signatures..spell it all out so there isnt anything she can come back at you with. perhaps have her mother choose and finalize. she may be more realistic.
Maybe ask her what she didnt like about the other flavors in hopes of helping her pick some better choices. Like maybe it was too rich ect. or ask her if she has a favorite dessert...maybe you have a flavor like it or can find one. Explain to her you would like to pin down a flavor soon because you want everything to be perfect for her and feel you are a little behind schedule on the details. Apologize for that. Sometimes people act like jerks because they feel they will get more or better product than if they act nice and you can walk all over them....not that you would. It isnt your fault and she is being crazy but can you afford to say no to a good order. besides she may be really stressed and come down from her mean streak and give you a ton of referrals or order more from you. You never know.
I would look at it this way. Is it worth your trouble? You have enough on your plate with kids and other orders, you need to put your foot down. Tell her that you can not do any additional samples abd that at this point, 2 weeks before the wedding, she needs to make her final decisions on her flavors. I don't know how your payment schedule works, but my brides usually have to pay their balance either 1-2 weeks ahead of time. At that point no more changes can be made to the order. I say if you tell her that all decisions need ot be made and are final (in a nice, but firm way). If she doesn't like it then simply say that you will be returning her deposit and good luck in finding someone to do her cake. This may sound a little harsh, but I'm guessing your like me and don't need the additional stress of this woman! Good luck with whatever you decide. Keep us posted.
I would look at it this way. Is it worth your trouble? You have enough on your plate with kids and other orders, you need to put your foot down. Tell her that you can not do any additional samples abd that at this point, 2 weeks before the wedding, she needs to make her final decisions on her flavors. I don't know how your payment schedule works, but my brides usually have to pay their balance either 1-2 weeks ahead of time. At that point no more changes can be made to the order. I say if you tell her that all decisions need ot be made and are final (in a nice, but firm way). If she doesn't like it then simply say that you will be returning her deposit and good luck in finding someone to do her cake. This may sound a little harsh, but I'm guessing your like me and don't need the additional stress of this woman! Good luck with whatever you decide. Keep us posted.
Yeah.. I'm with melysa.. $1000 for what? She is doing tortes and individual cake favors.. that's a LOT of work.. if she can't decide after all of this time then she needs to be put in her place. there's 2 weeks to go.. I'd tell her she needs to come to a decision when she has her next samples or you will not be able to make her cake. She needs to be an adult about this.
I don't really have much experience in this area but I say stick by your contract otherwise she will try to get as much out of you and leave you with a really short amount of time to get the actual work done. She's trying to get all these cakes from you for nothing! 
Is she taking them home with her or is she trying them in front of you. I'd be wary if she was taking them home. Probably taking them for family and friend gatherings. Don't let her burn you. If you've written down what she's already tasted just remind her and if she asks for it again advise her, like the other ladies here have said, that you are going to need these two weeks to prepare the perfect wedding cake for her rather than cake samples.
Good luck and let us know how you go.
I can't get over the cupcake thing, does she think they will taste different in another form? Yup, sounds like a Bridezilla to me.
i can understand this to an extent. (well i don't personally understand it) my husband, before our wedding, asked me if we could have birthday cake instead of wedding cake because birthday cake tastes better. non-cake people are sometimes clueless about cakes and what's in them and think that there is a a recipe out there that says cupcakes, one that says wedding cake, one that say birthday cake etc.
TWO WEEKS BEFORE THE WEDDING?! 
I would tell her that she needs to make a decision now! AND stick with it. You need to start preparing for this and can't do it all at the last minute. I realize that it is $1000, but will the trouble end at the wedding? She sounds like she will continue with her poor attitude even after the big day. You have to ask yourself if you are willing to let this one go for your own sanity. Good luck! Let us know how it goes. My thoughts are with you! 
When I got the tasting samples when I was meeting with my cake decorator, she gave us samples from leftovers of cakes she had done that week- we didn't get to try the carrot cake we wanted to try because she didn't do one that week- but boy were we happy we still chose it because her other ones were all good.
Maybe you could try something similar and let her know that you already gave out our your samples that you had from leftovers for cakes you did this week? (She doesn't have to know there weren't any). But you would be happy to charge her to make her a trial cake- especially since she receive several samples already. I would then make sure that you get everything in writing with her signature (even a drawing or a picture of what she wants) and then take LOTS of pictures of it when you are done and it's set up, just cover your butt wherever you can--- that is if it's worth the hassle to you.
I don't have a lot of experience selling (just about none) cakes but I was a bride within the last 3 years so I've been on the other side. I've also been in the flower business and had to deal with bridzillas. We always verified everything, got signatures and took pictures if they were real trouble.
Good luck!
I don't mean to play devil's advocate here, but if you back out on her two weeks before her wedding, she's going to have a hard time finding someone else on that short of a notice. PLUS, from the way she sounds if you do tell her you can't do it she'll probably bad mouth you to everyone within hearing distance. Just a thought.
I don't mean to play devil's advocate here, but if you back out on her two weeks before her wedding, she's going to have a hard time finding someone else on that short of a notice. .
in my opinion, its the other way around. its TWO WEEKS (!!) until her own wedding and she is being undecisive and uncooperative. she needs to be responsible and make some decisions without being so demanding.
(i had a nice tone in my voice 
dont be offended.)
It's two weeks before the wedding...she's already tasted your samples. SORRY, you do not have extra samples on hand and will be unable to provide her with any more, period!
Ask her to please choose from what you have already given her or choose from the website (sorry if she didn't ask to taste those samples back in April).
You are not a bakery with everything at your fingertips, you are a homebaker who has given her 4 months to decide what flavors she wants.
Bottom line, decide what flavors without more samples.
I dont have a business and you are all more knowledgeable than I am in this aspect, but I can say as a customer...if you refused period to help me at all. I would go with you because I would have no choice, but I would never recommend you. There is nothing wrong with putting your foot down, but put it down softly with a little compromise and make her feel like you are making this decision in her best interest.
I would tell her she needs to come on X day and you can let her try 1-3 (what you feel comfortable with) samples and that she needs to come to a conclusion about the flavor and details at the end of the tasting. Make sure she knows this is because you want everything to be perfect for her and make sure she knows you normally wouldnt allow any more samples but want it to be just right for her special day.
Next time you can avoid this situation by placing a details deadline with the bride on the contract she signs when she gives you the deposit. Make sure they know you only give out X amount of samples until there is an extra charge and that all flavors and decorating details have to be set in stone by X amount of time after the consultation any changes after that will have an extra charge and there will be no more changes X amount of time before the wedding.
Actually, you should have nipped this in the bud MONTHS ago!! I don't mean to sound hard, but YOU have let this situation develop to where it is now.
Put your foot down... no more samples and she needs to decide yesterday.
I require payment in full 5-6 weeks before the event.
Call and tell her you've provided more samples than you usually do for receptions and that she needs to tell you what she specifically wants by this Thursday along with getting the remainder of the payment to you. No money no cakey!
As for the future when it comes to samples I agree with what the others have already mentioned, first meeting samples are free, but like any good sugar dealer, you get them hooked then charge em! The first tasting is a freebie and YOU control what they get, no specialty requests unless it comes up from them on the initial interview (things like a chocolate or strawberry allergy), then if they want to try any specialty flavors it's $20 each.
A while back I had a bride who was friend swith my sister, I already knew she was very difficult and undecisive. She finally met with me about 3-4 weeks before her wedding. She had a whole list of things that she wanted, 10 different cake pictures, etc. She liked the cake but had to see what her fiance thought. He wasn't sure about the cake and she called my sister freaking out b/c she really wanted me but he didn't like it, blah blah blah. She wanted to know if I could change my recipe (um no way, I've had ALOT of satisfied customers w/ that recipe) Basically she wanted to keep me hanging but was still looking for another bakery that fiance liked and that would do her design. BTW, Charm City laughed at her when she called and asked for a sit down and tasting so close to her wedding! I decided that even though it would have been good money, I knew from my and my sisters experiences with her that they were not going to be completely satisfied. I emailed her and told her that it would be better for them to go elsewhere for the cake. With 2 kids uner 3, I did not need the extra stress. It was her own fault for not having her stuff together so close to her wedding. Maybe she was going to bad mouth me to her friends, I've had one unhappy bride before, (loved the taste, didn't like the design). Maybe even she bad mouthed me, I STILL HAVE BUSINESS. I haven't noticed a sudden stop in bridal businees. That's business, you win some you lose some. You have to make decisions that are going to be best for you.
Little princess needs a kick in the fanny 
and you need to be the one to give it to her. I'd say something like this. " My policy is to provide one set of sample as past of the wedding package, and we've provided you two. I am happy to provide 6 inch cakes in whatever flavors you'd like for $30 each if you are having trouble coming to a final decision. In the meantime, I have had another inquiry for Aug 11th, and since we don't have all of the details confirmed, I am going to be compelled to return your deposit if we can't get this situation resolved by Friday."
You are a professional. You need to project that image. Be nice, but be firm. Remember that the dress shop gave her deadlines, the reception hall gave her deadlines, etc etc. Act like a professional and you'll get customers who expect a professional.
I would be tempted to give her a default wedding cake if she doesn't make up her mind immediately. Default wedding cake = white cake +white butter cream frosting +white decorations in the size needed. Then she can't say you ruined her wedding by quiting on her at the last moment.
I agree with who ever said to have her sign the contract at the time of the first (and only) tasting and paying of the deposit. Have a definate deadline for them to choose style, flavor, and to bring the cake topper and pay the remaing balance. If they don't meet this deadline then return the deposit. Be firm, witch doesn't necessarly mean being rude.
No checking with fiance CaCaPootie. It's their wedding, if it is important for them to have just the perfect cake then both need to be present at the tasting. I am also a home baker and know it is hard to supply samples. It is easier to make a a 6 inch cake or cupcakes but instead of giving them the entire cake to sample just give them a slice and only provide a certaing number. When they call for an appointment maybe you could ask if there is a particular flavor they would like to try. Let them know the initial number of slice samples are free and you would be happy to provide a additional slice samples or a small cake at an additional charge.
I feel for you. It is hard when you have to deal with difficult people. Going out of your way to make them happy to no avail. I learned the hard way to get everything in writing with signatures. Provide them with a copy. Get sample ribbons or material of the colors they are asking for so there is not confusion when what they asked for doesn't match what they see in their heads. Charge extra for people who wait untill the Monday before the Saturday wedding to order a cake for 150 people.
Good luck
I agree with mezzaluna, you should have nipped this one long ago. Maybe it's because I've had more than my share of difficult customers. $1,000 or $10,000, it's not worth it. She truly sounds like the type who will give you trouble down to the very last minute, and may even make you chase her down for your payment. You only got $100 deposit. That's nothing for a $1000 order. At this point I wouldn't buy one single supply for this order unless I had half down. If it were me, I'd tell her to find another baker. Your time and effort is worth more than this.
Another poster said she'd never recommend you if were to turn her down. Well, so what. Who needs difficult customers? She's the one being the pain in the patooty, not you. Just my opinion.
Mickig 
one thing to think about is brides may not know the work that goes into these things and may not realize that not having the flavor picked out is a big deal.
It is your job as a professional to help your customer have a plesent experience and make things go smoothly for you and them. You have to keep things in check and stay in control.
I am sorry, but why hadnt you been calling her to let her know you needed things done before this point? You have to set deadlines. You cannot expect a customer to know when they need to have information to you or decisions made by.
Refusing to do a tasting without the bride AND groom present cracks me up. My husband and I were married last year. We had 4 months to plan and are both very busy professionals, so it was all about divide and conquer. I care about food, so I handled that. Music was important to him, so he took care of that. If any vendor had insisted both of us be present, I would have said goodbye immediately.
Ok- so back to the original question. I think Txkat has it just right. The fact that you work from home makes it even more important to be as professional as possible. But that doesn't mean getting railroaded. Decide what (if anything) you are comfortable with offering and compromising on before you contact her again and stick to it. Sounds like she definitely needs a firm hand.
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