So...I confronted the guy at choir last night before choir began. I told him that his comments made me uncomfortable when they ventured to closely to my marriage. I told him I had nothing against innocent flirting...I'd always accept compliments about my voice/singing 
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He apologized - he did not realize that what he was saying affected me so. He thought that it *was* innocent flirting.
Our concert is this Saturday afternoon, and then I won't see him for the whole summer. I really hope this issue is resolved. Only time will tell.
Thank you again for your honest answers and support. I really appreciate it 
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Whew ~ I feel better and I can only imagine how much better you feel this morning. Like Shirley, I feel there is no such thing as "innocent flirting" 'cause like I said in the other post ~ one thing leads to another (kindof like the story of the Gingerbread Man).
But, nice compliments are great 
Glad you got it worked out. Lesson learned? There is no such thing as "innocent flirting" when your married. It can create problems like this by giving the other person the thought that it is okay.
I don't necessarily agree with that. My dh and I have two sets of friends that we flirt with...and them in return. It's done in complete friendship with absolutely NO connotations of it going any farther than words. It's just that we have extremely deep friendship feelings for them. Both couples are strong in their christian faith, as are dh and I.
The big difference is that everyone involved KNOWS without a shadow of a doubt that it's wordplay only. Unlike with the choir guy, where I do not know him well enough to gauge his real intentions...which is what made me nervous.
Glad you got it worked out. Lesson learned? There is no such thing as "innocent flirting" when your married. It can create problems like this by giving the other person the thought that it is okay.
I don't necessarily agree with that. My dh and I have two sets of friends that we flirt with...and them in return. It's done in complete friendship with absolutely NO connotations of it going any farther than words. It's just that we have extremely deep friendship feelings for them. Both couples are strong in their christian faith, as are dh and I.
The big difference is that everyone involved KNOWS without a shadow of a doubt that it's wordplay only. Unlike with the choir guy, where I do not know him well enough to gauge his real intentions...which is what made me nervous.
Ok, I was going to stay out of this, but it's been eating at me! I don't think there is such a thing as innocent flirting. Especially for females- we love attention like that from whoever will give it! I am not trying to be judgemental or condemning, please know that. Anyway, if anyone is interested I am going to post the website address of my church. Any service you choose to watch and listen to would be great, but there was one series in particular that comes to mind. It is called Lord of the Rings. It was so awesome. You can look it up in the series section. My favorite of the series was titled "How to have an affair".
If you don't care for the music, which is contemporary, and sometimes secular but goes with the sermon, then fast forward at bit. Don't miss the funny or interesting video that is usually right before he preaches, they are awesome.
And please, if you are not interested, don't watch it! I'm not pushing this on anyone!!!
http://isite78285.intellisite.com/225499.ihtml?id=225499
-Select Lord of the rings from the list.
Sherri
I am not in the least bit religious and don't mean anything Biblical in what I said. I just believe if you have commited to enter a marriage with one person, then innocent flirting with someone outside that marriage can be a dangerous thing. It can give the other person the impression that it is alright with you. Now would that man feel the same way if his wife were flirting with another man? I doubt it. I think you need to get your flirting out of your system before you are married, if you want to do any afterwards, do it with your own husband and it may even keep your love for one another fresh and as important as the day you married.
Shirley, I hope I did not offend you with my comments. I agree with you 100%. Even though I do believe the Bible is extremely relevant for this and other situations, I only brought it up because MissMeg said she and her friends all shared a strong christian faith.
BTW, Shirley, I have learned some incredible things from your threads on the site. You Rock! 
Sherri
Sherri ~ I'll have to check them out. I did a quick listen to one "How to Have an Affair" and I liked what he had to say about David. I hope anyone who is tempted to play around with flirting or affairs will have the courage to check out that website. I play to listen to them to help me in dealing with couples in the near future. Thanks for having the courage to share this
Shirley, I hope I did not offend you with my comments. I agree with you 100%. Even though I do believe the Bible is extremely relevant for this and other situations, I only brought it up because MissMeg said she and her friends all shared a strong christian faith.
BTW, Shirley, I have learned some incredible things from your threads on the site. You Rock!
Sherri
Not offended at all Sherri. I believe everyone should have the freedom to whatever they believe in. I just thought I was sounding preachy and didn't mean to.
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