hate to disagree with some on this discussion, but at the very LEAST, people could have commented on how the cake TASTED! To recognize that someone put in effort to making a cake (whether or not the viewer felt it compliment worthy)....the cake maker should at least be recognized for BRINGING the cake to share and for the taste of it. (unless of course, it was horribly tasting, uncooked, or burnt).
Thank you to everyone who can sorta-kinda feel how I am feeling. Although I wasn't asked to do this cake, I thought there would have been some kind words. If someone did an ok cake and you could tell that alot of effort was put into it, I would definitely say something nice about it.
But, nevertheless, I will continue to do cakes....even when not asked to do one. I made a 'just because' cake (and wrote that on the top of it) for my in-laws to practice doing roses. I guess I thought that if I just put flowers on it, it wouldn't have been special and everyone would have thought that it had been purchased at a store or bakery. I wanted it to be alittle more personal.
Oh well...not to worry. I'm past it now. I would have posted this when I was feeling bad about it, but I work 12 hour shifts so it is hard to find the time to bake, when you are either sleeping or working.
Thanks for the kind words everyone. It is muchly appreciated.
sorry for the double post.....but I agree with Doug,Bethola, and bobwonderbuns.
Learning to appreciate people's efforts is a skill that is learned through time, maturity, and experience. It's about being appreciative, regardless of the circumstance. The cake doesn't have to be at Collete Peter's level to warrant thankfulness and appreciation for the effort put into it.
You know, its really difficult to convey meaning well in these kind of posts. We cannot see body language or vocal inflection of the person talking, so we have to guess. I am sorry to the original poster if I offender her, I meant no harm.
In the last two years I have endured a 24 yr old daughter getting married, and then being diagnosed with cancer and dying all within 18 months, and I have reached a point where i do not focus on things that i see as trivial. In my estimation whining over a cake that didnt garner enough kudos at an event is one of those things. That is a statement of fact as i see it from my personal perspective, so please don't pummel me with defenses for having an opinion. I try hard not to rain on others parades but some parades are not worth participating in. Fussing about what didnt go over with with a bunch of strangers is one of those things.
I did try to offer encouragement to the original poster. I hope that something I said has offered someone who read it some encouragement.
oh, Mmichellew I am so sorry and sad for your loss.
Here's my take and please don't take this the wrong way. I just don't sugar coat much! I think most of us here (me included for sure) are a bit cake obsessed and the rest of the world really could care less. It's a cold hard fact that most of us cake people don't like to think about. 
Think about how many posts we read and look at this fantastic cake that someone makes for a client only to have the client pick it up and barely say a word but thanks and here's your money. They don't see it as an art form or even have the slightest clue how much work goes into a custom cake like it sounds like you made. It's very hard to get used to and to learn that you won't get feedback everytime. We'd all love to have it/hear it but that ain't gonna happen. Even though your dm saw you bring it in, did she know you took the time to make it? Probably not, right? Think about it this way-did you compliment everyone that made a dish that night? Probably not. It's just the nature of those situations. Like someone else said you were there for business and the food wasn't the business. Besides that's what you have us CCers for! You know we're going to give you the love! 
So hold your cake head high and keep working on your craft and most of all have fun with it and try not to take it so seriously. And we can't wait to see your creation and hope you share it with us soon!
mmichellew - first off, let me extend my deepest condolences to you on the loss of your daughter. A mother should never outlive her children. Never.
Having lived a life watching many close to me suffer and die (brother who was 14, aunt who was 26, and father who was 63, and witnessing the horrible accidental deaths of two close friends), I know the feeling of finding everything else in life trivial when held up against the pain over losing someone you love. Reading someone else's worries over her cake and how it was received very well may seem unimportant compared to the deep rooted feelings of loss, grief, and despair you are still very likely working through.
I guess, for me, having gone through those situations (and LIVED through them), it changed me in a way that made me appreciate the little things in life. I learned that time is precious AND limited. I learned that I never wanted to make anyone feel that any feelings they might have are insignificant or unworthy of my time and attention. I began to realize that I never know when someone's last day might be....and MY words of encouragement, hope, and support might be the only ones that a person might hear before they breathe their last.
Living through deep loss has made me want to be the type of person that people can rely on to come to for tactful honesty, encouragement, and always a smile.
I feel for you....and hope in time, your grief will only serve to make you all the more the person whom your daughter so loved.
Hey just checked out your cake photo this cake IS great! I cant get my BC that smooth and I am guessing you did the design freehand? Another thing I find really hard to do! (heck I have enough trouble colouring in the Wilton character pans! ) Awesome work!!
In complete agreement with bethola. I am a believer in if you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all; but not in situations like this. Someone got a custom cake, not sure if they paid for it (?), but regardless; all that needs to be said is "Thank you". I had a similar situation with my pink and black cake in my pictures. It was given to a friend. It's been over a month, I put it on the bottom to the cake carrier and explicitly told her I needed it back and have not heard one word from her, not even to say the cake was good, bad or otherwise. My good friend *Patty gave me some advice to somewhat ease the sting of not hearing from this other "friend". She said "Natalie, I know how you feel and why you feel it because I would feel the same way; but you can't take it personally, because not everybody has common courtesy and manners." And she is absolutely right (especially about this other friend); so try not to be too stung by it and keep on truckin'! BTW, I think your cake is really cute, I saw it earlier (pics are slow so haven't commented!)
just saw the cake, and they TOTALLY should have said something about the design. It looks great! The only think I can think of (when I saw it) was that maybe they didn't like the taste of the black icing. I made a cake once that had some black icing.....and the parts that had the black tasted gross! I told the people not to take the black parts!
Anyway,...the cake looks great.
I think it is a great cake...fabulous job!!
I feel for you...There is nothing worse , when you put your heart and soul in something and they disregard it.
My inlaws are like that..I just did a couple of cakes for them....NOTHING! I had to say....To them...DO YOU LIKE IT? duh?
I am a girl....I like and diserve Compliments!!!! DAMN IT!!!
Well....watch I bet you will get orders from your night...They may of just been to shy to say something.
mmichellew - first off, let me extend my deepest condolences to you on the loss of your daughter. A mother should never outlive her children. Never.
Having lived a life watching many close to me suffer and die (brother who was 14, aunt who was 26, and father who was 63, and witnessing the horrible accidental deaths of two close friends), I know the feeling of finding everything else in life trivial when held up against the pain over losing someone you love. Reading someone else's worries over her cake and how it was received very well may seem unimportant compared to the deep rooted feelings of loss, grief, and despair you are still very likely working through.
I guess, for me, having gone through those situations (and LIVED through them), it changed me in a way that made me appreciate the little things in life. I learned that time is precious AND limited. I learned that I never wanted to make anyone feel that any feelings they might have are insignificant or unworthy of my time and attention. I began to realize that I never know when someone's last day might be....and MY words of encouragement, hope, and support might be the only ones that a person might hear before they breathe their last.
Living through deep loss has made me want to be the type of person that people can rely on to come to for tactful honesty, encouragement, and always a smile.
I feel for you....and hope in time, your grief will only serve to make you all the more the person whom your daughter so loved.
I commend for all to read: "Our Town" by Thornton Wilder -- especially act III.
In writing about why he wrote the play, Wilder asserted it was intention to show the VAST importance of the SIMPLEST things in life. Pay close attention to what Emily says "Goodbye" to.
Yes, life is precious and far to short, and we tend become SO self-absorbed if not even self-obsessed, that we forget the needs, wants, desires, dreams, and feelings of others.
One of my mother's mantras was: "It took me 2 hours to cook it, you 20 minutes to eat it, and NO one even said thank you." Her way of reminding us, that yes while she was expected to do the cooking (and.....) a "Thank you" was still in order as an expression of our gratitude and would be the validation that what she did had worth. She wasn't asking use to rave or fawn over it; just appreciate that she had done it for us. (see Act 2 of OT for a similar discussion between George and his father)
Having buried both parents, a brother, countless relatives, friends and even students, I know the void such losses leave and the constant nagging regrets of "if only I had time to say......." -- and think of how many times you finish that w/ "Thank you for......".
Carpe diem! -- sure, but remember we are but the chaff the wind blows away, poor flowers who spend a day in the sun (before hopefully joining THE SON) and use that "day" to make someone else's time in the sun a bit more enjoyable too.
wonderfully stated, Doug. For some reason, this topic reminds me of that song by Jim Witter called forgiveness. The last verse reminds me to take the time I have now to say those little things to those I care for.
Forgiveness
Bobby Tomberlin/Jim Witter
Little Mickey Johnson was my very best friend
In first grade we swore wed stay that way to the end
But in seventh grade somebody stole my bike
I asked Mickey if he knew who did it, and he lied
Cause it was him
And when I found out it hit me like a ton of bricks
And I can still see that look on his face when I said
I never want to talk to you again
Sometimes we lose our way
We dont say things we should say
We hold on to stubborn pride
When we should put it all aside
To waste the time were given seems so senseless
And one little word shouldnt be so hard
Forgiveness
A little card arrived on my wedding day
Best wishes from an old friend was all it had to say
No return address, no, not even a name
But the messy way that it was written gave it away
It was him
And I just had to laugh as the past came flooding through my mind
I should have picked up that phone right then and there
But I just didnt make the time
Sometimes we lose our way
We dont say things we should say
We hold on to stubborn pride
When we should put it all aside
To waste the time were given seems so senseless
And one little word shouldnt be so hard
Forgiveness
Sunday morning paper arrived on my step
The first thing I read filled my heart with regret
I saw a name I hadnt seen in a while
It said he was survived by a wife and a child
And it was him
When I found out, the tears just fell like rain
Cause I realized that Id missed my chance
To ever talk to him again
Sometimes we lose our way
We dont say things we should say
We hold on to stubborn pride
When we should put it all aside
To waste the time were given seems so senseless
And one little word shouldnt be so hard
Forgiveness
One little word shouldnt be so hard
Little Mickey Johnson was my very best friend
Countrykittie,
I haven't seen your cake but I do understand how you feel. I've read most of the comments...well, majority of them and honestly, I'm like whoa! No matter what your cake looked like, tasted like or smelled like, you still want to be appreciated. Anyone putting forth an effort for anything, wants to be appreciated for it. You can feel that way...you can! No matter what level of experience you are on...there will always be that one person that comes out the woodwork and not like it...can't tell you to just get over it or prepare for it, but it IS coming. REGARDLESS of what anyone else may be going through in their lives, a kind word is still nice. No one wants to be kicked when they are down...no matter what reason you're down. You have feelings and you can "whimper" and "whine" if you like....'cause that's how YOU feel. No one should tell you how to feel 'cause no one wants to be told how to feel. I work really hard at what I do...(and let's get HONEST) I don't ALWAYS look for compliments but the appreciation is great. If I didn't work hard at it, I probably wouldn't care. My very 1st cake was the worst thing on the face of this earth...and they laughed at me but it was all in fun, I didn't care. I laughed too. But I when I got into this professionally, I had someone that didn't like what I had done and I beat myself up about it. I did learn that I can't beat myself up like that but it's okay to feel. I had supportive friends and family around me that supported me and said "Hey, it's okay" and I still do. I know you were looking for friends & support when you made your post, someone to say "Hey, it's okay". Some people can relate and some people that "don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all". No one wants to be told GET OVER IT.
Countrykittie, if you ever want to "cry" with me...I'm here, I feel ya! 
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