ok, in another post i vented how upset i was that my mother's friends were offended that i invited them to dinner to celebrate my mother getting her GED and was making them pay for their own dinner. Seems I may have been wrong in assuming that people would understand a dinner inivation means......you pay for yourself. This is how it works and is understood in my circle of friends (hey we are going to dinner to celebrate XXXX, would love for you to come?? We know they aren't paying for us and we have never thought they were), but guess it's not the same w/everyone!! should not have assumed everyone would understand.

my husband and i have been wondering....how do you invite someone to a celebration dinner...AND let them know they are paying for it. We can't come up w/anything that doesn't sound.....dumb or rude??

any suggestions?? We still have few people to call and would like not to screw this up and offend everyone of her friends!!!

TIA,
christine

How about:

We are celebrating Mum's success in passing her GED, and are asking friends and family if they would like to join us at XXXX Restaurant. We have checked with the restaurant and anticipate it will be $xxx per person. Kindly let us know if your budget would accommodate this, and if you are able to come on xxxxxx at xxxxx. Look forward to hearing from you.

Something like that.....
Barb

I've only seen this thing done with family. When you issue an invitation, you're supposed to pay. So the "hey, want to meet us at Red Lobster" thing is reserved for family. If you want to invite others, then I would just have a reception at home. Chicken drummies, punch, bagged salad and cake are a cheap way to party and no one goes home starving.

I agree with bubblezmom if you invite, you pay. if you can't afford the elaborate celebration have something at home, its usually more fun anyways.

thanks, I like BritBB's idea. We can't have it at my house or hers....and couldn't afford to pay for everyone either way. And dinner is what my mom wants to do.

But as I stated.....dinner invites are what we do in my circle of friends..not family... and noone ever expects to have their dinner paid for just b/c they have been invited to dinner. it's just an invitation saying we would love your company. And noone has ever gotten offended and thrown a fit about it.....unlike the ones I'm dealing w/now.

oh well, they'll either come or they won't. And if they don't then, my mom will know who her true friends are!!!

oh, sorry i just re-read my post and it sounds a little harsh...nothing directed to anyone here. my mom's friends are frustrating me b/c they just won't let this go!!!

pinkbunny,

Maybe next time you can add the wording dutch treat so that they will know without a doubt that they are responsible for their own meal.

Congratulations to your mom on getting her GED.

forgot to add: Congrats on your mom achieving her goal, proving its never to late for success. Also, she will know who her true friends are, and if this is the norm, the friends that won't let go, well, she will probably have a better evening without them. I think they'll just complain that they were invited to something and had to pay their own way. Have fun at the dinner.