I have been discussing with the gal at the gym that watches my kids in the day care about her August wedding since LAST August. She emailed me a picture of the cake she wants and has looked at my cakes on my website and blah blah blah. I have answered all her questions about wedding cakes and what is tradition and how this and that is done and I just found out this last week that I will not be making her cake!!!!!!! 
Her half-sister's mother will be making the cake. She is a pastry chef for the convention center in Seattle so apparently she is qualified and said that she will make the cake for $2.00 a serving. I quoted her $3.00 because of what is involved with making the cake. Shoot, I even told her what filling would go great with her red velvet cake!!! I'm pretty pissed! I think she just used me to get info and take that info somewhere else. Sure it's family, kind of, that's making the cake but dang it!!!!
Amy
Bummer - sounds like you got undercut. You're right...she probably went to the other lady and said, "This is what I want, and this is how much she is going to charge me. If you can beat that price, I'll go with you." But how much profit will that other lady make? Not too much if she's doing it a whloe dollar cheaper p/s than you quoted.
Oh, I don't think this is a situation where evil is afoot. It sounds as if she was genuinely interested in having you do the cake, but then this family-member-type-person agreed to do it close to cost. As far as picking your brain for ideas, the family-member-type-person sounds pretty capable in the idea department, and is probably sitting back snotting at having to follow some suggestion recommended by some other baker lol. Sounds to me like the girl just found a way of leaving the cake hastles to a family member.
I had this happen with a secretary at work. She ws adamant that I do her wedding cake...whenever she got married. Then, she found the right guy, set the date, etc. His aunt wanted to do the cake, and she decided to keep peace in the family and went with her. Apologized profusely. Was I upset? Not at all. This was family, and you keep the family happy.
Sometimes keeping the family happy is the best route to go. I remember a friend of my mom do our wedding cake for us. She did a great job and it was very inexpensive for us, even though we knew someone else that did cakes and we wanted to use our friend. I don't think she was picking your brain to give the other person ideas.
The same thing recently happened to me...my cousin, the groom, wanted me to do the cake, but the bride's aunt (who has no experience in cakes) insisted on doing it. I catered the rest of the event and silently laughed to myself when the wedding cake started to fall apart during the event and had to be cut into early before it completely fell apart. I know it sounds mean, but to this day, they admit they made a mistake by going the route they did.
I agree, she intended and was definately interested in my making her cake but she is definately a bride who is "shopping around" for the best price. She's spent the last six months gathering information and price quotes and is now making deposits on everything so I don't blame her. I'm just sad to miss the opportunity to do another wedding cake. They don't come often for decorators such as myself!. She did pass my number to her maid of honor for the bridal shower cake. Oh, she also inquired the other day about a groom's cake. She had never heard of one!!!!! 
She was appreciative of the info I gave her. Hey, at least I am confident enough in my knowledge about cakes/decorating to give her information about cost and design!!! I wouldn't have been able to do that without the aid of ya'll here on CC!!! 
Amy
My husband has three children. When his son got married, he told me right to my face that I was not good enough to make his cake...fine, I didn't want to anyway...then his other son got married, same thing..."you aren't good enough yet"...then when his daughter got married, her mother told my husband that she wanted a professional to do her wedding cake. My husband told his ex-old hag "I will put Candy's cake up next to a professional's any day"...(bless his heart!)...his ex-hag told him "the cake that Amber wants is going to cost you $600"...my husband said, "the cake that she is going to GET isn't going to cost me a DIME!" So they finally gave in and "let" me do it. Then she told my husband that she supposed the only thing that I could make would be cupcakes and sheet cakes!! WTF!!! So I made the most beautiful cake that she had ever seen!! It was EXACTLY what Amber wanted...when it came time for the cutting of the cake, the Old Hag's SIL came up to me and said, "my girls were expecting cupcakes and sheetcakes, they don't know how to cut THAT"...I said very politely to her, "I will be more than happy to show them how to cut my cake"...I got so many compliments about the cake. And AMBER loved it...that's all that mattered.
WOAH!!!
You are a good woman and your husband is a great man! GOOD FOR BOTH OF YOU! How presumptuous of them to think you could only do cupcakes and sheet cakes and to actually expect that!!!!!! 
Whatever, I'm so glad you showed them. Bet they'll stuff it the next time they need a cake!
Not good enough!! Sheesh!!! 
What did they know. You showed them!
Amy
Wow Candy...Not good enough? Well, they didn't deserve you cake anyway then.
OKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY....so yesterday a lady called me and wanted to come and look at wedding cakes for her niece's wedding in May. I told her how much it would be and she asked if I would deliver it to a town that is 45 miles west of here. I said, "yes, I can do that" and before I had a chance to tell her that I charge 30 cents a mile, she said, "I bet you can even talk her into throwing in a couple of bucks for gas"... A COUPLE OF BUCKS?????? 
Has she checked the price of gas lately??? I told her that for 90 miles it would cost her $27 for delivery...she said "It's only 45 miles to the town"...I shouldn't have said this, but she kinda pissed me off offering a COUPLE OF BUCKS to start out with...and I said, "well, unless you are going to buy me a house in that town, I'm gonna need mileage coming home too"... 
SHOULD I HAVE SAID THAT??? Guess we'll see if she really does come and look at the pictures that I have of the cakes. 
I think she just used me to get info and take that info somewhere else. Sure it's family, kind of, that's making the cake but dang it!!!!
Amy[/quote]
Although I know how you feel, I don't think you should feel she used you.
Brides will come to see what you do, and you have to sell your self the best way possible, even pitching some ideas that they might use somewhere else only that way you'll feel you did your best. I you keep the good ideas for your self, and she doesn't come back, you will be killing your self about the things you didn't say.
Give the price you feel is fair, and only the people who appreciate your talent will be your clients.
Paola
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