Bad Day Even Worse.. Rant Gonna Start Drinking Everclear Mad

Decorating By wgoat5 Updated 1 May 2008 , 5:31pm by BrandisBaked

wgoat5 Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:19pm
post #1 of 34

So I have been having cake problems since yesterday.. hasn't been a good week at all.

Let me explain.. I have been doing the cakes at school for a long time. My kids attend this school. I don't charge a arm and a leg (my fault). I decided to donate my sons 8th grade graduation cake AND his sports banquet cake. (Now remember I said donate) I offered this to the sports director about a month ago. Well.. oh she loved it that I was doing it.. (who wouldn't want a free cake???) I was also doing this as a favor to my son. These cakes are to feed 100 ppl apiece. FREE... So she says something about the sports banquet and senior grad cakes... both to feed 100. I send her a note saying I'd do them both for 400.00

So here is the letter I got back


I'd love to get you to do the high school banquet and grad cakes, but unfortunately the athletic department can not afford that due to our huge transportation bill.

I hate to ask this, but are you donating the cakes for the middle school banquet and middle school graduation? If not, I'll have to go another route for the aforementioned reasons.

If you are - I will send home via Will (my son) the numbers for the banquet on Thursday. If not, please let me know at your earliest convenience.

Thanks bunches,

Now what would you write back if you were me.. . I want to send her something tomorrow. IT REALLY P*SS*S me OFF!!!

33 replies
mamacc Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:28pm
post #2 of 34

Duh!!!...why would you say $400 if you were planning on donating them??? That's a lot of cake to donate!

HerBoudoir Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:35pm
post #3 of 34

So she wants you to donate both the ones for your son's middle school AND the ones for the high school?

akgirl10 Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:42pm
post #4 of 34

I guess she figured if you could donate 200 servings, what's the big deal over another 200? yeesh.

JanetBme Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:54pm
post #5 of 34

I think she is trying to say that if you are donating them to the mschool sports and the ms grad- so if you are doing that- why wouldn't you donate to the hs sports and hs grad nite....she thinks you are doing it for advertisement.

But The way I see it is- answer her that you have a CHILD in middle school so that's why you are donating those- but you don't have a graduating senior and a hs kid., Perfectly logical reason... She's bating you to get you to cave- Tell her sorry but you can't afford to just do it for everyone- that the first cakes will cost you quite a bit to do! Let her check out prices of other cakes-if they go with walmart or somewhere cheaper- so be it.... then they'll see your cool cakes for the ms stuff while they end up with walmart sheet cakes -done crappy.

Amia Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:55pm
post #6 of 34

Write her back and say, "Yes, I'm donating the cakes in exchange for a $400 donation, from the school, to my bank account." icon_wink.gificon_smile.gif

BrandisBaked Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:55pm
post #7 of 34

I wouldn't take it personally. They have a budget, and can't afford to pay your prices. 2 less cakes you have to do, right? icon_wink.gif

jenncowin Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:57pm
post #8 of 34

I would explain to her that you are willing to donate the cake for the middle school since your son is in attendance there, but you can't donate the additional cake for the H.S. Maybe you can work something out for the cost of ingredients instead.

Last year my boss and I donated 5 sheet cakes that served 64 each for my daughters 8th grade graduation and didn't even get a "Thank You", won't happen again. A few simple words were all it would have taken. I understand that schools are strapped on their budgets, but they can't get EVERYTHING for free.

Good luck and keep us posted!

wgoat5 Posted 30 Apr 2008 , 11:59pm
post #9 of 34

My main problem with this letter is... She knew I was donating due to my son. But then she pays someone else?

terrylee Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:01am
post #10 of 34

Thanks bunches.......??????

that's sicky sweet.....asking for a bit much isn't she?

Good luck with Costco or Walmart cakes. She will find out the hard way what's good and what's not.

HerBoudoir Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:02am
post #11 of 34

More than likely she'll look for someone else to donate them rather than actually pay for them.

BrandisBaked Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:03am
post #12 of 34

The bakery I used to work at sells full sheet cakes (96 servings) for $65, and they give a 10% discount to schools. I can see why $400 for 2 cakes would be out of their price range if they are used to paying prices like that.

wgoat5 Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:04am
post #13 of 34

Here is what I thought about writing..

Dear XXX

Due to my transportation expenses also I will no longer due Clxxxx Independant school cakes.

I will donate to my sons mid school graduation and his sports banquet and that is it.



terrylee Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:08am
post #14 of 34

Who you choose to donate to and for is your choice.
She would realize that . Just because your child goes to that school doesn't make you the only donator of cakes.

She should be thankful you do what you do and not ask for more. Some people, always looking for a freeby. I realize school budget are tight but come on........

If she wants them for free maybe members of the graduating class could each donate cakes. We have done that for several events for the kids,,,,FFA, 4-H and school

BrandisBaked Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:09am
post #15 of 34

I'm really confused why you are so offended. Please take a moment to calm down before sending her anything... icon_smile.gif

imartsy Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:10am
post #16 of 34

I think you should just write back that it's unfortunate this isn't going to work out. Just let her know gently that you are donating to your son's school because he is in attendance there and you have already included that spending in your family budget. Just tell her the budget doesn't have enough room to donate that much cake at this time. Also tell her that you don't own a bakery (I think you said you didn't), so you really have nothing to gain by donating - whereas a business may gain customers by donating a cake to a charitable organization or school, you as an individual don't have any expectations of receiving new customers or building your "brand" of business by doing charitable works.

Thank her for asking, but tell her it's just not something you can do right now.

Good luck! I hope it all works out.

Amia Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:14am
post #17 of 34
Originally Posted by BrandisBaked

I'm really confused why you are so offended. Please take a moment to calm down before sending her anything... icon_smile.gif

I think maybe she's offended that they expect her to donate but would willingly pay someone else.

FromScratch Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:16am
post #18 of 34

I wouldn't be too offended either. She is just assuming.. and making an a$$ out of herself. Just tell her that you donated to your son's class but cannot donate to the high school and thank her for her interest. Badda bing badda boom done. icon_smile.gif

I'm sure she just wanted to be sure that she wasn't going to get an unexpected bill for the middle school cakes too. Don't let that boot cake anger spill over into the rest of your life.. icon_wink.gificon_lol.gif

Cheesefairy Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:20am
post #19 of 34

I guess I'm not reading it the same way...I thought she was ok with the fact that you would charge for the high school cakes and declined. Then, because you would charge for the high school cakes, she wanted to check if you also planned to charge for the middle school cakes or were donating them so as to avoid a misunderstanding. If you were going to charge for the middle school cakes, that's where she has to go another route.

bakerchick Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:25am
post #20 of 34

I think it's the old addage give them an inch and they'll take a mile!

my suggestion is writing back with something like this in mind - you thank her for the offer but tell what she can do with it - very politely of course! and still have a smile on your face!! icon_wink.gif Oh and don't fret if she does go elsewhere for her cakes, i don't think this is the sort of customer you really want - she'll be haggling for every cake she asks for in the future. icon_confused.gif

Dear XXX

thanks for the offer of making the H.S cakes, however i must decline as i am only able to do my sons cakes as a good will gesture free of charge.

I am sorry to hear you are having budgeting issues, might i suggest you ring other bakeries to see what they have to offer that is more within your means.

If i can be of further assistance please let me know.

regards thumbs_up.gif


wgoat5 Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:34am
post #21 of 34

If she had said.. Christi THANK YOU for donating the cakes... it would be different.. but if my cakes were to be paid for then pretty much NO WAY... That is why I got so upset. Plus, the cupstacking cake I am doing.. well is being paid by the school.. hmmph go figure

Ok... I'm ok.. just I guess frustrated icon_sad.gif

Sorry for the vent

indydebi Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:37am
post #22 of 34

Well trust me you couldn't send my suggestions. icon_twisted.gif But it really bites that consideration of everything you've done to this point doesn't carry any weight at all. You can bet your royal behind that the mom who shows up at all the ball games and waives the banners and provides hot chocolate for the marching band at football games gets recognized for her 'contribution'.

This isn't about the money. It's not about getting the business. It's about recognition and APPRECIATION for the support you've GIVEN to that school to this point.

Happened to me with a volunteer organization in my hometown years ago. I was doing wedding cakes and some small catering, so I volunteered to do lunches and refreshments at a number of events for this orgz. I did sandwiches, salads, munchies, veggie trays, fruit, cake ... the whole nine yards. It's sounds very baby-fied now, but I was completely overlooked for a simple thank and recognition and I stopped donating all of this food.

Suddenly just cookies and punch was "good enough". They were perfectly willing to accept my goodies (and the expense I put out for the big spread!) and all I wanted was thanks and recognition for my contribution ... just like everyone else who contributed.

It's not the money .... it's a simple thank you.

wgoat5 Posted 1 May 2008 , 12:44am
post #23 of 34
Originally Posted by indydebi

This isn't about the money. It's not about getting the business. It's about recognition and APPRECIATION for the support you've GIVEN to that school to this point.

It's not the money .... it's a simple thank you.

This is what I am upset about.. you hit it right on the rose nail head Debi icon_smile.gif

FromScratch Posted 1 May 2008 , 1:34am
post #24 of 34

Oh Christi.. I totally understand why you would feel a bit slapped in the face.. I just wouldn't let it get to me. I agree that the gesture of thanks goes miles further than the money. I would send her what Debi posted and call it a day. ((hugs)) Don't appologize for venting.

beachcakes Posted 1 May 2008 , 2:32am
post #25 of 34

I second what Debi & Jeanne said! Sorry you're having such a bad day - maybe just pour yourself a wee shot of Everclear? icon_wink.gif

JanH Posted 1 May 2008 , 2:38am
post #26 of 34

I certainly would have been upset, too. icon_mad.gif

Vent all you want, we're here for you, girlfriend. thumbs_up.gificon_biggrin.gif

(And as I'm sitting here drinking my water, I'm imagining it's Everclear!) icon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

fiddlesticks Posted 1 May 2008 , 2:41am
post #27 of 34

Some people just suck !! It makes you not want to even donate anything ! Sorry to hear your having such a rough week Christi ! I bet all of your cakes will be great though !

lorijom Posted 1 May 2008 , 2:48am
post #28 of 34

Christi, you need to put that d**n cup stacking cake and boot cake and the internet problems and now the HS cakes out of your mind for a few minutes. Think back to those fabulous days on the beach drinking everclear mai tais, getting a sun burn. Remember the good old days and all will be well with your world icon_smile.gif

Seriously, you have a right to have your feelings hurt...everybody needs to know they are appreciated and a thank you goes a really long way.

wgoat5 Posted 1 May 2008 , 3:11am
post #29 of 34

I decided I'm going to invent a stress ball that looks like a cupcake.. any takers? LOL

I think it's just that I had a lot of problems this week.. if it weren't so bad I think I would of taken that comment with a grain of salt..

*shrug* oh well shoulda coulda woulda huh?

dinas27 Posted 1 May 2008 , 2:09pm
post #30 of 34


My first thought is that she is extremely unprofessional in sending a note like that through your son. Its like everyone now sending emails and emails and emails instead of getting on the phone to clear something up! (dont get me wrong I love my email) People think that confrontation is ugly... (watching too much TV) and that things will turn violent or <cry> feelings will be hurt! People deal with text and numbers now, and think that they are doing everything themselves(when planning/organizing)! So when peopel provide $$ to them it is a big deal beacuse woo hoo they have it to spend themselves but when a person donates 'time in lieu' that effort often goes unnoticed.

So for my ramble... but I like to deal with people in person (that said there is a time in place, email is great for confirmation and to print/store for your records) as I find that things can be cleared up instantly and tones are not read into text

Back to the original dilemma...
I would either give her a call or write a note back
reassuring her that yes you are going to be donating the two MS cakes. Include the cost of what they would have been retail (ie the FUL cost of your donation - not any different that if you bought and donated the cakes yourself from a bakery! Then state that you are sorry but you cannot afford to also donate the HS cakes but that perhaps the money that they saved on the MS cakes could go towards the HS cakes at the aforementioned greatly discounted price. Perhaps ask her if she would like to approach some other parents to make the cake or donate some extra $$$ to the event (and if she says well no I couldnt do THAT - then reply but you were more than happy to ask me to donate an additional $400 to the event with raised eyebrows - then she'll turn bright red tapedshut.gif )
Oh the scenarios we could come up with!

Quote by @%username% on %date%