B B & B Will order one for you.

How 'bout this....order and prepay for one from bb&b and convince them to let you take the one from the display and replace it with the one they ordered for you. offer to sign a waiver or something. I mean...if you need it NOW.

Can you just use the whisk?

I am so sorry about the paddle for your mixer!! Do you know anyone that has one that you can borrow until you get a new one? Or can you borrow another mixer from someone?? even if it's not a KA if it gets you through for a little bit? Good luck, I honestly don't know what I would do without my KA. But in difficult times, you know?

Oh my, I would've loved to have been a fly on the wall during that party.

I"m sorry you can't find your paddle. Is there anyone you can borrow one from? Anywhere you can go buy one? A hand mixer? (I know it's not the same but just to make the cake...)

Here's hoping it turns up somehow.

I'll probably get flamed for this but........it sounds like you both have some growing up to do. Yes, it was rude of her to tell you to do a cake as a "gift". Yes, it was even more rude of her to tell you exactly how she wanted the cake to be since this was to be a "gift". Yes, it was even ruder of her to tell you to be there at a certain time since you were to be a guest with a "gift" and not as a caterer.

But...

You did have the option to decline her request. I understand it took you off-guard and agreed without thinking it through completely. Instead of fuming about it for days and getting yourself in a tizzy, you could have been the mature person in this situation and A) called her the next day and politely let her know that you mis-spoke and have decided it wasn't feasible to do the cake for her - period or B) treated this cake like any other paid cake order and, being the professional you are, been prepared to make it and get it there in a timely manner.

It's unfortunate that you couldn't find your paddle. Had this been a "paid" cake would you have waited until it was too late to do anything about it before starting to make it. It's unfortunate that you got stuck in traffic. If this was a "paid" cake, knowing how traffic can be, would you not have allowed extra time so that you would at least arrive in a timely manner and not 2 hours late?

To be the bigger person in this situation, even if you did everything as if it were a "paid" cake and still ended up having to purchase a cake and get it there 2 hours late, the least you could do is arrive at the shower with an apology and explaination and remain as the guest you were invited to be. Dropping off the cake and present without any explaination and taking off immediatly, then avoiding calls is just down right childish.

Maybe the missing paddle IS karma for not handling this in the appropriate way.

Remember she couldn't find the paddle BEFORE she was going to make the cake not after?

Instead of calling her immature and childish, why don't we all just say:

LESSON LEARNED. On both parts.

She didn't make this topic to get flamed, and I think she gets the point that she could have declined the request, but sometimes that's difficult when it's someone that you know pretty well.

Either way, I think she learned her lesson about difficult and rude people, and will probably know how to deal with them better now.

Don't flame her for it - because, you know, that's childish and rude also.

Well said, oneprimalscream!
Very well said!

I feel for the OP on this one. This is a long reply, so I apologize for that in advance.

When I first started the Wilton classes three months ago, I was gung ho to try everything I learned and get more experience with decorating so I could improve.

As I live alone and definitely don't need cake sitting around at home, I took all of my practice cakes to work for everyone there to enjoy. Soon, people started asking me if I would make cakes for them. At first, I was reluctant and said no, but soon was confident enough to try basic, simple cakes for people whose only other option was the Wal-Mart bakery. There's just something so much better about a home-made cake than an assembly-line, cookie-cutter store-bought cake.

Since I don't have a certified kitchen, and really wanted the experience, I told people I would just charge them for what it cost to make the cake. One of the girls in my department asked if I could make a car themed cake for her son's birthday. I jumped at the chance and started preparing for a piping gel transfer design from a coloring book picture on a two layer cake. She loved the idea...then told me they wanted a separate cake for the birthday boy so he'd have a smash cake all his own. No problem, I thought - more practice!

So I told her I would just charge her for the ingredients (which I rounded up to $5). The next day, she came up to my desk with two boxes of store brand cake mix and two cans of store brand frosting. I kind of laughed and said that I only used Duncan Hines mixes and that you couldn't use store brand frosting as it wouldn't crust and wasn't thick enough for decorating. Her reply? "Oh, well, you can use them for something else because I don't bake." I didn't feel as if it was worth arguing over $5 so I dropped off her 'supplies' in the food pantry bin and used what I had at home. The cake was adorable and everyone loved it when I brought it in. I actually got a few more orders from people who saw it. The smash cake was just a simple 3" layer with a shell border.

I was going to write the bad parts of the experience off (along with the cost of the supplies) and look on the bright side - I got more orders, after all! But then she came in the next day and said that while she and her husband really liked the cake, and especially because it was so cheap , her boys thought that because it was so decorated and pretty that it really should have had a fancy filling between the layers so they wouldn't eat it. AND, she gave me a big 'tip' that I should find a frosting recipe that wouldn't smear so easily because the bottom border 'melted'.

Well, I wasn't too worried about not having a filling as the buttercream looked good to me, but the idea of my border melting really got to me. I asked my instructor, looked online (I didn't know about this forum until a month later) but no one could figure it out. I asked her to bring in pictures but she said that it wouldn't show up. Everyone else in our department was mortified that she would make a fuss over a FREE cake.

This woman's aunt also works for the same company as I do, but in another department. She came up to me and asked if I could do a train cake for her other grandson's birthday. I asked her if she was sure she wanted me to do it as her niece wasn't happy with the cake I had done previously. She was stunned and told me that they were all bragging about the cake at the party...and that my border didn't melt - the youngest boy got into the cake and ate that border before it was served. Can you picture the finger marks? THE MOTHER KNEW ALL ABOUT THIS!!

I don't understand how people can behave so horribly...she knew I felt awful but still wouldn't own up over what really happened. But I did learn a big lesson about making sure both parties understand up front what is expected and what the charges will be. I'm a very non-confrontational kind of person for the most part and didn't want to cause a scene at the time but I am not going to lose money again over this kind of situation. If a person wants to pay for a cake's true value then complain I can handle that but if you're getting a cake for nothing they have no right. In the OP's story her 'client' was even more demanding but I probably would have agreed to make the cake because I didn't know any better. Now she knows so I don't think anyone needs to make her feel any worse over the situation.

By the way, this same woman asked me to make a cake for next weekend for another birthday but this time wanted a one-tier, two layer fondant wrapped present cake with fondant bugs all over it. I calmly told her $30 for the ingredients and I needed to use what I normally do for cakes. Her mouth dropped and she said that that was outrageous. My reply - "Well at least if I use fondant you won't have to worry about little fingers in the borders." Then I walked away. She had the nerve to go around the department trying to sympathy and telling everyone how rude I am...and not a single person would give in...they all stuck up for me!

So, hang in there, OP. You're not the only one who has had to deal with it. As far as I'm concerned, they asked for a cake and you gave them a cake so don't let it bother you.

Just wanted to say... I'm proud of you. You handled it well, and you got her a cake and a gift. Now, hopefully you will find your paddle. Good luck with the paying cakes!

Sorry, all, but I agree with Peajay on this one.

It is what I call being passive aggressive.

They do have BJ's in NJ and if you knew that's what you were delivering and going to arrive late, you could have made a phone call and given them the option of picking up a cake themselves to have it there on time.

The OP also knows that to just driving into NJ makes this at least 1/2 day commitment.

Blaming someone for the missing paddle attachment also indicates a perception of being a victim. Please tell me if indeed it was taken by the accused. I'll happily eat my words. (Put crusting buttercream on top, too.)

I wasn't shocked to see all the posts advocating giving the mother to be what she deserved, but I think the OP ended up making everyone miserable (perhaps herself too-NJ traffic is a ). It's sad since she already admitted she was mad at herself for not saying no in the beginning. It seems that there were a couple other points on the way she could have said no, but still didn't.

Houston, my mouth is just hanging open from reading your story. The nerve of some people!! I just don't understand how someone can blatantly lie to make someone feel bad. And what little boy is going to not eat cake because it doesn't have a "fancy filling"! LOL That's a good one.

You handled that very well. I'm sure she goes through life complaining about everything.

I might get flamed for this one.

I am not sure how elaborate of a cake she wanted, but in most cases I could make a cake a lot cheaper than what I can buy a nice baby gift for so I would have happily said yes when she asked for a cake as her gift. I am not so sure she was using you. She knows you love to bake and that you are good at it so she probably figured you would enjoy making something for her and the baby vs. buying something expensive from a baby registry.

As far as the way you handled it all...I think you should have thought about and just came back and said,"No" if you did not want to do it.

I understand about traffic and no that was not your fault. BUT to get out of the car and hand the lady a sheet cake and a gift and LEAVE....that right there made you look like the smaller person and almost as if you did it on purpose and then when she called not answering the phone or returning the phone call...How petty is that?????

I hope you find your paddle as well, but if I knew the night before the paying cake that I could nto find it I would have went out and bought a cheap hand mixer to use until I could find it. I mean you have made a commitment to these folks too and to say it is 11 am and they need it by 6 pm and there is NO WAY!!! I would be finding a WAY!!!!



I hope everything starts to lighten up for you and I hope after all of this the pregnant lady is still your friend!!

I agree with jennifer293 -

If someone is paying you for a cake and depending on you, you do whatever it takes to deliver and find a way.

I am sorry that the whole situation has caused you distress - but if doing cakes is your passion (as it is mine) - you should remember the looks of delight on people's faces when you make them a cake just for them.

Some people are rude, you can't help that. But you can control what offends you and how you want to treat others.

Try to remember how much you love doing this and you will be blessed for your efforts.

Wow, I am so late. I did not know all this was going on since my last post.


Peajay66 ( Leta, Jennifer293 & divaricks) I don't even know where to start. My paddle being missing was the last thing from my mine, so when I got home on Friday (Having all of my ingredients already in the house) my goal was to get my kids ready for bed do there hair and iron our clothes for the next day because I knew I had to be there at 2:30.

I have no problem being up all night because if it was a PAYING CAKE that is what I do. When I noticed the paddle was missing it was too late to go to the store to get anything. I live in BROOKLYN, NEW YORK, we do not have a 24 Walmart or something. I figured the best thing I could do was buy a cake.

I left my house at 12 NOON because I do know Jerseys traffic ON A SATURDAY. When I got out of the Holland Tunnel it was 2:30 and when I got to exit 14 Which is ONE exit away from the tunnel it was almost 4 so if it was a paying cake or NOT THINGS HAPPEN.

I was NOT just trying to be mean. That is not the type of person I am. I just came to vent a little frustration and you guys are acting like I killed somebody. I am not all in a TIZZY. I am not looking for sympathy I felt that you guys would understand what I was dealing with. There are people in every situation that is always trying to get over. Look what happened to Houston.

I think everyone has been given enough time to make their opinion heard and twindees stated on more than one occasion she learned her lesson. I am locking this post since twindees was kind enough to come back and let us know what happened.