I Need Strength. Long

Lounge By Karadactyl Updated 17 Mar 2011 , 3:35pm by Karadactyl

Karadactyl Posted 16 Mar 2011 , 11:19am
post #1 of 8

I lost my mom to cancer in August. She'd been sick for 5 years and put up a hell of fight. She was 51 when she died and at the time I was 22 weeks pregnant with my 2nd child, my now 3 month old baby girl.
Sunday was 7 months since she'd died. My best friend's mom had been sick for 3 years, also with cancer. She died on Sunday. Seven months to the day after my mom. She was 52. My best friend is currently 22 weeks pregnant with her first and her mom's first grandchild, a little girl.
Melissa, my best friend, is the oldest of her siblings but only 25. All of the arrangements have fallen to her. I've been trying so hard to be there for her but its just like reliving August. The funeral home and black dress shopping, all of that. I just don't know how much more I can take. I was very close with her mom, considered her to be another mother to me. I was still reeling from the loss of my own mother and now I lost Jean and have to watch Melissa go through the same pain I go through everyday.
I'm not sure what point I'm trying to make or even what I'm trying to get from this post. I really just needed to write this down. If you made it this far, thank you.

7 replies
Ursula40 Posted 16 Mar 2011 , 11:28am
post #2 of 8

Melissa needs you now, you can do it, somehow, we find strength, when we think we are all out.

Will be thinking of you, I have been through so much, I know it is possible. Will be sending you strength through whatever means possible

KitchenKat Posted 16 Mar 2011 , 12:17pm
post #3 of 8

I cannot imagine how tough this must be for you. I have no words for you but I want you to know I'm here and I'm listening. I hear your pain and wish I could give you more than just this message. (((hugs)))

cheatize Posted 16 Mar 2011 , 3:32pm
post #4 of 8

It's been six years since my niece died and I still have a really hard time going to funerals. I'll pray for you. I know it's really, really hard.

ladyellam Posted 16 Mar 2011 , 9:42pm
post #5 of 8

First, I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my mother and it has never gotten easier, it's just different. I still think of her every single day. My mom and my aunt were best friends.

My cousin and his wife were murdered in a home invasion and shot my 2 year old cousin (thank God she made it). I went to comfort my Aunt and to see her in so much pain again it tore me apart. I didn't think I had the strength to go to the burial because of my mom. One of my aunt's sisters came to me and grabbed me hard and said "you've got to be there for her, she needs you!" I told her I couldn't and she grabbed me again and said "you've got to be there for her, even if you break down--SHE needs YOU!" So I went, broke down with her and just held her.

She needs you and it's going to be rough and raw but in the end....she needs you!

Again from the bottom of my heart and I'm crying right now thinking of you, I'm so so sorry.

Kellbella Posted 16 Mar 2011 , 10:24pm
post #6 of 8

I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother. I'm sending you cyber hugs{{{{ }}}} and prayers.

scp1127 Posted 17 Mar 2011 , 1:21am
post #7 of 8

Nobody told us that when we have children and grandchildren, we had to lose our parent and grandparents in exchange.

Karadactyl Posted 17 Mar 2011 , 3:35pm
post #8 of 8

Thank you so much for all your kind words, thoughts and prayers. It's been an incredibly long week helping with the funeral arrangements. The viewing is tomorrow night with the funeral on Saturday. I've tried to be as helpful as possible and have sat with her while she's cried a few times. It just breaks my heart to think that she has to go through all this.

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