Last night I dined with a close friend. She will be hosting a Pleasure Party in April, of wich I will be a guest, and wants me to bring in a cake of the male anatomy. We were enjoying a wine tasting wile we dined, so I am not sure she really "heard" what I had to ask. I asked if she would be paying for the cake and for how many people...I then stopped myself and said she and I should sit down alone to discuss specifics and cost. She just laughed it off and told me what she wanted then and there. I asked her again through the night who would pay for it, but she never gave me a straight answer. I don't think she was avoiding answering the question, as she was just having fun, but I do need a straight answer. She might expect me to "gift" her the cake. She asked if I would be willing to do that if she purchased some items and gifted them to me in exchange- only problem is, I am not interested in any "toys". How should I bring it up again when I know she is sober? We live far away and e-mail is the best way to get a hold of her. And I need help with the wording of any written contact between us. Anytime my name t attached to an e-mail or one of my cakes, I am very careful, friend or not. Any advise?

"I'm sorry (name), but I'm not in the market for 'toys' just now.
I need to pay the gas man... I don't think I want to give him 'toys' as payment - He might get the wrong idea!"
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Perhaps too much for an acquaintance, but you did say she was a close friend, didn't you?

She is a close friend, but becuause of distance and social lives, we don't see each other too often. she is very strong willed (not that Iam not) and doesn't like to take no for an answer. She networks A LOT and I think she sees this as an opportunity. I agree with you about payment.

I KNOW THIS MAY BE A LIL LATE BUT BETTER LATE THEN NEVER LOL. 1ST WHEN EVER I AM SOCIALIZING WITH FRIEND AND FAMILY , OR IN A NET WORKING EVENT AND I GET VERBAL ORDERS ON THE SPOT. I LISTEN TO THEM AGREE TO DO IT AND HAND THEM MY BUSINESS CARD EVEN IF THEY HAVE MY PHONE #. IT'S A NICE WAY TO REMIND THEM THAT I AM IN BUSINESS. I TELL THEM TO CALL ME SO WE CAN DISCUSS THE DETAILS. I EMAIL PICS OR INVITE THEM OVER FOR A VIEWING OF MY CAKE PICS. IF ITS A SPECIAL OCCASION LIKE A WEDDING, SWEET 16, OR A BIG EVEN LIKE THAT THEN I INVITE THEM FOR CONSULTATION AND A TASTING IF THEY HAVEN'T ALREADY TASTED MY CAKES. THEN I GO INTO THE ?'S eg HOW MANY PEOPLE, WHAT KIND OF CAKE ETC ETC THEN I GIVE THEM A PRICE. IF RENTALS ARE REQUIRES LIKE TOWER STAND OR TIER STAND AND THEY ARE CLOSE FRIENDS OR FAMILY I DON'T CHARGE THEM AS LONG AS THEY PROMISE TO BRING THEM BACK THE FOLLOWING DAY. THEY ARE HAPPY THAT THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO PAY RENTAL FEES AND THE MATTER WAS DONE IN A PROFESSIONAL MANNER WITHOUT ANYONE GETTING OFFENDED. HONEY IF YOU LEAVE IT TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY YOU WOULD BE OUT OF BUSINESS BEFORE YOU START LOL. I HOPE MY WAY OF DOING BUSINESS WITH FRIENDS & FAMILY PROVES TO BE HELPFUL FOR YOU GOOD LUCK.

Tata 65, Thank you for your input. It was not late advice. We (friend and I) spoke briefly about it and I told her I would e-mail her the detals based on what she wants. She will then approve (or not) the e-mail and we will go from there, in person, of course. I will take 2 copies of my contract as we may not have access to a xerox machine. I know she is none too happy about having to pay for it...she is a woman who is used to getting her way. But I guess she really wants this cake, and paying for it is the only way she'll get it from me. Thanks so much and I will keep your ideas in mind! Take care!

AI glad I could b of help. Sorry for da late replies but I don't always log on. I need to make time to do so. When dealing wit friends & family I get very professional so they know I mean business and that they are expected to pay.