As if my night couldn't get any worse... well I think it just did.
Let's see where do I start...
72 cupcakes for 8am pickup...baked (yes)
Cream Cheese Frosting...made(yes but not enough)
youngest son (19) on a tirade about his brother taking his pants (checkaroony!) (did I mention they were in his closet buried under a pile of other clothes)
So he decided to pull his brothers work clothes out of the washing machine (soaking wet I might add) and placed them in the KITTY LITTER BOX!!!!
Just broke up the fight and after darn near losing my mind asked both to return up to there rooms so that things could return to defcon 1 and we could neutralize a potential strike...
Started a load of laundry (son goes to work for 9am and needs his uniform)
well my 19 year old decided that he wasn't gonna listen and that he was the big tough guy and started spewing out all sorts of threats (usually harmless and just words) to his brother!
My response? "This is MY HOUSE and it is MY RULES, now you have a choice to make either go to your room or if your not going to listen then get the hell out!"
Well he left, and now I am worried sick. The area we live in is not the greatest and I doubt he would go to a friends at this late hour. Not to mention his closest friend is about 1 hour walking distance.
I have these cupcakes I have to finish, got to find an all night store or supermarket (25 min drive the nearest one) but I am torn cause I should be looking for my son.
I am still quite angry with him and he knows he crossed the line but the area we live in is known for its high crime rate, Drugs , prostitution and crack houses.
I know he is 19 but he is very naive about certain things and I am scared sick!
God I feel like such a crappy mother right now cause I want to finish my cupcakes too!
Ugggghhh! Ok pity party over just had to vent and get it out of my system.
Off to grab cream cheese and look for my son!
He'll be fine. He just needs to cool off a bit.
Hi Mensch I hope your right, Just got back from hunting down cream cheese and searching for him.
He's been gone now for four hours...I cant even begin to describe the horror show that's playing in my mind right now.
No sign of him out there although I did count 11 hookers, 3 pimps and I am sure a drug dealer or two.
God, I think it's time to move!
I love my kids but sometimes I don't like them!
I know I must sound like a terrible mom but God it's just how I feel right now.
I know he needs to cool down, we all needed that. But I cant help feeling like a piece of crap right now.
Ok time to frost the rest of the cuppies and take my mind off of everything.
You are not a terrible mom. You laid down the law and didn't budge an inch.... just like you should have done!
He's an adult and needs to start acting like one!! *l*
G _cakes, I know how you are feeling, You are not a bad mother!! He is too old to be having thise kinds of fights with his brother especially in your home! I hope your son is okay. I agree he needs some time to cool off. My sis is 21 and throws fits on my mother all the time. She constantly threatens her and acts like a complete jerk when things don't go her way or when she thinks something of hers in missing. My mom tells her to leave then she starts with the threats and guilt trips and makes my mom feel horrible.. When he gets home maybe you all can talk. Let him know you are not going to tolerate that kind of behavior..Good luck!
You are NOT a terrible mom. A terrible is the one who gives into her young adult child as if they were still 2...and even if they were 2 being 2 and given into, you would still be a terrible mom. I listen to the neighborhood you describe and if thats where your son grew up, he's not as naive as you think. Even he didn't grow up there, hes not as naive as you think. He'll be fine.
You are not his friend, you are his mother and a darn good one at that. You have every right to set the ground rules in your home. If he doesn't like them, he is old enough to get a job and move out on his own.
If it helps at all, my DH ran away from home for a couple of days when he was a teen, and while I am sure his mom was worried, she acted like she hadn't really noticed that he had been gone after he came home. He didn't do it again because he didin't get the reaction from her that he expected.
I do pray that your son is surrounded by angels and that he returns home safely.
You are a MOM doing just what a mom of a 19 year old should be doing. Laying down the law and then being worried sick when our kids respond so irrationally. Hoping for a safe return soon. When my da was 13 she ran away for a week with no word. I feel your pain! She came home when she found out the grass was not greener on the other side of the fence.
Thank you all for the support and words of encouragement.
He came home around 5am and we did talk. He never left our back yard (LOL) said it was too nutty out there to be wondering around the streets that late at night.
We talked for about an hour and we laid out some ground rules so that we could avoid this situation again.
I feel better knowing that he came home but those few hours I was a wreck.
Thank you all again I love you guys and CC
I am so glad he is home safe and sound.
Glad to hear he is home safely and you worked it out! Good luck!
I figured that was as far as he went! LOL My yunger cousin decided to run away (he was trying to miss the plain that would have took him back to his dad's house) with another younger cousin. Once he missed the plain the came home. the other younger cousin told his mom,"I'm not ever running away again. It's hard out there and I was hungry!" I think they were missing 6 hours!
I have to apologize because when I read your update and it said he was in the backyard the entire time because it was crazy out there I did a real life "lol".
It was a serious situation and I laughed.
You obviously did something right if he knows not to go "out there" after dark to hang out with the 11 ho's, 3 pimp daddy's and 1 or 2 dealers you saw.
Glad it worked out for you.
Thank you guys so much...
We had a great talk this evening and I think we managed to get a little closer (Im hoping)
He was feeling stressed out about school, he graduates in January and wants to go to university but was feeling like he wouldn't get into his school of choice.
He's been working real hard and is set to get a scholarship but I guess the pressure has finally gotten to him.
He lashed out at everyone around him and thus the ensuing storm.
But I think now that we have spoken about what was truly going on he feels a bit more relaxed and understands that if he don't get into University of Toronto then there are many other great schools he can choose from.
He is a smart young man and I know that any school he chooses would be happy to have him.
Thank you all again...(sigh...happy one)
I'm glad things worked out, but must point out he owes you at least one load of clean laundry.