First some background. . .

I decorate cakes as a hobby and have done some for friends and family. I was scheduled to do a wedding cake for a co-worker on Aug 22, 09. This was postponed until next year.

This same co-worker has a family member that was getting married on June 27, 09 and her cake decorator passed away suddenly a month before the wedding. So the co-worker as me if I would do the cake. This was to be a BIG cake so I said get me the information and I'll see what I could do to help them out with that. This wedding got postponed.

Now I get a IM on facebook from a gal that graduated with my husband. We are not close friends but do talk off and on and she's had some of the cookies I've taken to the school for our kids parties. She asked me about doing her wedding cake for Aug 22, 09 and since the 1st wedding scheduled was postponed I told her I'd look into it. She was supposed to call me the beginning of last week to discuss the details. I get another IM on Tuesday of last week telling me the amount of servings, the colors and the shape of the cake and that she would call me for further details.

Now if your still reading, and thanks BTW, this is my problem . .

I haven't heard from her since then. It's frustating because I have never done a wedding cake and I get really excited and then let down. I don't know if I should just leave it up to her to call me or if I should initiate any more contact. My husband thinks I should leave it to her but if she thinks I'm doing it and then at the last minute doesn't have anyone to do a cake, I will feel bad. (I know I shouldn't but that's me).

Should I contact her or wait for her to call me?

After she IM'd you the details did you respond?

If not, then yes, I would definitely contact her and tell her that you'd like to get the contract finalized by 00/00/09. (Give her a definite date so that she knows this needs to get done) Definitely use a contract and get a deposit.

Good luck!

My guess is she was waiting to hear back from you on the price.

I did discuss an estimated price with her during the IM, we were chatting briefly because she had to go, but said the the final price would be determined when we discussed more details. I don't know what flavors, BC or fondant, exact design, nothing, so I can't give an exact cost.

My problem is I'm NOT a legal baker (which she is aware of and came to me anyways) so I don't have a contract or anything. This was just on a friend basis.

I'm so confused and frustrated. Should I be pushy in this situation?

Again Thanks for any advice.

Contact her and tell her you need to finish discussing the details and get all the information so you can give her the price. Inform her that you need all the details finalized by July 10 (or what ever date in the very near future you pick) or you won't be able to do the cake.

After that, if she doesn't contact you back, let it go.

I understand the position you are in. Asking about and discussing a cake isn't always an order, even though people feel if they mention they need a cake to you, they ordered it. If you want to avoid her IMing you the week before the wedding, then be very clear what information you need and when you need it by.

I would email her the list of information you need, then follow that up with a call to her to let her know you sent her an email and ask her when it would be a good time to get together and discuss the cake.

Thanks to all of you for the advice. I think I will email her like you all suggested.

Update . . I emailed her a friendly reminder to get back with me and she called last night. We have the cake details finalized and she will be dropping off color swatches and a down payment on Tuesday. Yippee - this may actually happen.

Thanks to all of you for your advice. It means a lot to have people that understand to talk to.

Nikki