Hello all! I'm sure many of you have run into situations like this and I am curious if you have a way to nip it in the bud or have a polite comeback. Or really just a way to let it roll off your back. Recently at a ribbon cutting event I provided a mini dessert table. All was going great and we got rave reviews on the desserts. Then a person I know, but not very well, approached me and said what a beautiful table it was and would I consider doing corporate events. I said yes, of course, and he then proceeded to grill me on how I arrived at my pricing (not just was it per person or item, but how I actually arrived at the price). I was polite and answered his questions vaguely because I didn't want to get into any nitty gritty at the event. He went on about why what I was doing was wrong, how my table set up needed to be and what I HAD to do to get a corporate client. I finally just said I appreciated his input, that my pricing was on my website and I was happy to talk through events with clients. I really tried to be gracious, but I know my body language totally gave me away. He then went to my husband and commented that he had "only tried to help" me and I didn't appreciate it. Which really put my husband in an awkward spot because this person is sometimes a client of his. Long story short, I know people like this are rude and inappropriate, but it still does a number on my confidence. And never knowing who might be listening, I do not want to stoop to their level or come across as defensive. Do any of you have any advice on what to say and then how to not let these types of interactions ruin a perfectly good event-- or cause insecurities to pop up? Thank you in advance!

First, good you thanked him for the compliment on your dessert table. I would have  told this gentleman plainly, this is not the place to discuss business. Do not engage in business/pricing at a crowded venue, event. Hand him a card, and say I look forward to hearing from you. We can set up a time to discuss pricing for what I can do for corporate events. If they insist on asking questions, pushing, take a deep breath, and politely, but firmly state again, that you don’t conduct business at events, but by appointment. And if that doesn’t work, you can say, I have to leave because clearly you are not respecting my wishes, and walk away. If they make a scene, they make themselves look foolish, not you. You stayed, calm, cool and collected. At least on the outside. This gentleman is obviously used to getting his own way. Browbeating people. When you didn’t respond appropriately for him, he got personal. That is a classic tactic of a bully. Never, ever let anyone get personal, insulting you. Put them in there place, firmly and politely. Your heart may pound, and you may sweat, but that’s ok. The more you do it, the easier it will get. Don’t let anyone bully you. And make no mistake, he was bullying you. Hope this helps. 

Thank you, jchuck-- it really will help to move past this knowing someone else saw the situation as I did-- I did honestly feel like it was bullying. And this guy is a bit of a know it all-- but kind of soft spoken so it really catches you off guard! Its good advice to calmly repeat that I don't discuss pricing or even tactics at a large event and then just remove myself if it doesn't stop. I'm definitely going to try and be more prepared the next time-- maybe practice with some flash cards of responses :) Thank you again, jchuck!!

Your very welcome. No one likes to get bullied.

I totally agree that  this was bullying and a red flag immediately went up for me.  If this man put you in an uncomfortable, awkward situation right at the event, just imagine the level of control he will exert if you do events with him.  Think long and hard before you commit to work with him.

As June said, firmly state your position and if the individual does not respect your wishes, say, "oh my gosh, please excuse me but I must go to the lady's room!  I am about to pee my pants!"  Let's see what they say to that, lol!

Thank him profusely for sharing his dessert table expertise and ask to see photos of tables he has put together - - just so you can get a better idea, of course.

Yikes, good point, SandraSmiley-- I hadn't considered how working with him might be. HUGE red flag. Hahahaha--I love the comments about using the ladies room and looking at tables he has created, (cakefan92) -- they are going on my flashcards :) !!! I appreciate you all's support, and laughing about it helps get it into perspective, so thank you!