Making Your Grown Children's Wedding Cake

Decorating By DivaMomma Updated 9 Feb 2014 , 4:14am by DeniseNH

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DivaMomma Posted 8 Feb 2014 , 9:49pm
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I have made wedding cakes and character cakes in the past for sale to family and friends, but it is not my primary job.  I do enjoy making birthday cakes for my extended family and people love them.  So now I have a quandary: my daughter is getting married and we are planning her wedding on short notice (4 months) due to her fiance's pending deployment.  


I've always dreamed of making my children's wedding cakes.  I felt it would add a personal touch and I know they would taste yummy!  The problem is, will this be insanely stressful?  I was going to start experimenting with flavors and recipes to see what we like best.  That will take some of the last minute stress out because I will know I have a fool-proof recipe.  I want to hear from others who have made their children's wedding cakes.  How was the experience?  What would you do differently? Would you do it again?  Her wedding is on a Friday evening, btw.  


Thanks in advance!

6 replies
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enga Posted 8 Feb 2014 , 10:02pm
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Hi DivaMomma, I made my oldest s daughters wedding cake. It was a huge undertaking on my part as I had never made a tiered cake before. It was 6", 8", 10", 12", 14" cake. I was a nervous wreck by the time I got it to the venue.


In hind site, I think I would have baked all the cake in advance and froze them to save time and my sanity. I also wished I had done more research on there driving route as there was a lot of road construction and detours to get the cake there. I would highly recommend doing a test drive to the venue in advance and maybe taking the cake unassembled in boxes.


Just my 2 cents, good luck with you cake!

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-K8memphis Posted 8 Feb 2014 , 10:36pm
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i've done my kids cakes and we all understand that as a result i then am not around for mom type things pre wedding--it's a trade off--on one hand none of us would have it any other way--on the other i'm mia for some of the gettin' ready festivities--and then also you have no time to recover before you are in the midst of the celebration of a lifetime--it's all good and wonderful but it's quite a big undertaking--


i detail everything and have back up plans for back up plans for back up plans--you would not want to inject any panic into any of this -- avoid panic at all costs-- but plan for what you would do if you did panic--


so it's an awesome thing to accomplish--i have tons of experience--my last cake for my daughter i enlisted help due to health concerns and i was very glad i had dedicated help--i mean my husband is always on my team--he is my delivery assistant--he knows all the ropes--plus he knows not to mess with me during the 'crucial time'-- that i'm working and that after the cake is set up his wife will return--until then--she ain't available ;)


my nephew came last time and was simply my able bodied assistant for whatever i needed--he was awesome and he made the whole thing possible--forever grateful to him--


analyzing what you said there--that having a recipe nailed down will help eliminate last minute stress-yes but there's so much more of course--you need to apply that for every phase in advance to make it--


best to you

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cakeyouverymuch Posted 8 Feb 2014 , 11:42pm
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I did my daughter's wedding cake in June 2012.  My daughter told me 1) I want plain vanilla cake and plain vanilla buttercream, 2) My colors are the ones on our invitations, 3) I want dogwood and hydrangea sugar flowers, and 4)  This is our date.  Beyond that, with minimal consultation, the choices were all mine.  Keep in mind she was 2000 kilometers away.  I didn't want to have a stacking disaster so we decided to have each of the three tiers on its own stand and have the flowers attached to branches so they could be set on top of the cakes at the last minute (no poking holes in the cakes).  I baked and froze the cakes, made all the fondant, made all the sugar flowers and attached them to apple branches which were then wrapped in florist tape and coated with melted chocolate.  Put all the cakes on dry ice, put all the fondant in coolers, packed all the flowers on sponge in cake boxes, packed up my KA and Cuisinart and drove 2000 kms with the lot (well, DH did the driving).  Cakes were still frozen when we arrived and went into the freezer there.  The day before the wedding I thawed the cakes, made the buttercream, colored the fondant and covered the cakes and put on the ribbon.  The morning of, we drove two hours up winding mountain roads to the venue with the chilled cakes, set them up, put on the flowers and enjoyed the ceremony and reception.  The only thing I'd do differently would be to pay the extra for the venue to cut the cake.  I did it myself and it was a pita. 


I'd also choose not to have my grandson born 5 weeks early by the side of the road a week before the wedding requiring the bride to spend several hours a day at the hospital breastfeeding.  It also required the whole wedding dress to be rebuilt in a week's time.  All things considered, the day of went off without a hitch because the mother of the groom was a very special, very helpful, lady.  


If you plan, plan, plan you should be able to pull it off without a hitch.  Just don't volunteer to do too much else, pace yourself and do as much ahead of time as you can so that the day of is as unstressful as possible.


The cake is here:

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leah_s Posted 9 Feb 2014 , 12:22am
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AI did it but I had delivery help. I also got 5 hours of sleep total in the three days prior to the wedding.

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cazza1 Posted 9 Feb 2014 , 3:04am
post #6 of 7

Just as well my kids reckon they are not getting married!

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DeniseNH Posted 9 Feb 2014 , 4:14am
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I did all three of my children's wedding cakes and wouldn't recommend it.  There's so many things that need to be taken care of the week before,......... emergencies and relatives arriving that you can't visit with, plus traveling to the florist for cake flowers then to the venue to set the cake up (while leaving the bride and her maids to fend for themselves (not good) and you need to get to the venue early so they probably won't have the table cloth in place yet and you'll need to wait until the linen truck arrives because you don't want them to move the cake.  Then dash home to change and put out as many fires as you can before climbing into the limo to go back to the venue.   No thanks.

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