Ny Son Is Nussing

Lounge By paula1234 Updated 29 Aug 2010 , 4:53am by iluvpeeks

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dldbrou Posted 5 Jul 2010 , 3:43pm
post #31 of 73

Would it be possible for your local news station to post a news flash? We do it all the the time with elderly that wander off.

Hope he returns home safely and gets back on his meds. My father was also bi-polar and constantly threatened suicide. That never happened thankfully, but he was never a happy person.

Where in Ga. are you? I have relatives around Athens that I could send a note to look out.

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paula1234 Posted 5 Jul 2010 , 8:10pm
post #32 of 73

Dalton Ga. I have hung up my apron. I have given all my orders to a friend. I just can't think about cakes or anything right now. He always helped me with them. I just feel like I can't go on. As soon as I get my pictures together I will upload one. Once again, thanks for all the prayers, it is the only thing that can help us right now.

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subyu62 Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 3:05am
post #33 of 73

Paula,
Give me a few minutes and I will post info for you. I just need to gather it from the other forum.
Please be sure the police understand he is bi=polar and off meds. He is an adult so they don't treat it the same as a child. Also, he left on his own so that can change the way they handle it. You may have to be a bit pushy and keep on them.

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subyu62 Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 3:37am
post #34 of 73

Find out from police if he has been entered into NCIC .. if not push for it.
Have anyone and everyone you/he knows post his picture and missing info on myspace/facebook.
If his cell phone is under your name or plan request an itemized bill. That will help you see who he spent a lot of time talking to lately.
Do not put your own info on missing posters... use police dept, info only to avoid hoaxes.
The Natalee Hollaway Resource Center (NHRC) can help you with the process of getting the word out and help you navigate the system. They can help with resources you may need. [email protected]

Keep us posted.... If you need help putting up posters let me know.

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Karen421 Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 12:36pm
post #35 of 73

Paula I am so sorry for you. I keep checking back in hopes that you have found him safe. I have a son about the same age and my heart is just aching for you! Please know that we are all praying for you!!!

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paula1234 Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 5:27pm
post #36 of 73

I accessed my own phone records. He has not used his phone since june 30th. I have used family maps to try to locate him. it only works if his phone is on. I think he may have gotten another phone/

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KHalstead Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 7:11pm
post #37 of 73

Paula, I was hoping to see a report of his return by now. I will continue to pray for you to be strong and for your son's well being. How aweful this must be for you. I have lost a child myself but I knew where he was and who's arms he is in now...I can't imagine how terrifying this must be for you not knowing. I pray that you continue to get reports that he is in the area and safe! Hopefully he will call you and stop you from worrying (like a mother could ever stop?)

Continuing to pray for you....

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rosiecast Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 8:53pm
post #38 of 73

I will keep on praying for you. so sorry.

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JulieMN Posted 6 Jul 2010 , 11:26pm
post #39 of 73

Oh Paula....I am sorry to see that you are still waiting. I will continue to keep you and your family in my prayers.

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paula1234 Posted 7 Jul 2010 , 3:35am
post #40 of 73

I went to a store tonite and one of his friends works there and he told me that he saw him last night, told his friend that he bought a truck and was living in a near by town with his stepmom's parents. He has not saw his stepmom in 4 years since his dad's funeral. I am getting with the sheriff of that town and taking the papers from his doctor with me and hopefully he can help me. If he bought that truck, I know he hasn't thought about getting insurance on it. will try to keep everyone posted. My mom passed away 3 years ago and i hear her everyday saying You know, you have family everywhere. Family is all around you at all times, it is called your extended family. So I want to think my extended family here. I really can not bring myself to talk on the phone, so I text or go on cc. Once again thanks.

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KHalstead Posted 7 Jul 2010 , 12:21pm
post #41 of 73

Glad to hear of yet another report that he IS safe!! That's most important, at least he's safe.............now to get him HOME!

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iamcakin Posted 7 Jul 2010 , 1:02pm
post #42 of 73

Hooray! I think this is such GOOD news!

Thank you God, please continue to keep Tanner safe.

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rosiecast Posted 7 Jul 2010 , 3:13pm
post #43 of 73

Thank God he's safe. I wish you luck getting him back home. My prayers will continue.

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subyu62 Posted 7 Jul 2010 , 7:50pm
post #44 of 73

If nothing else ask the police to do a wellness check. Since he is considered an adult they won't "make" him come home but they can go and check on him and let him know your concerns. They will then let you know how he is.

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JulieMN Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 12:39am
post #45 of 73

I'm glad to hear that he has been seen. Best wishes on getting him back home safely. Will keep you all in my prayers.

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paula1234 Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 1:47am
post #46 of 73

Just returned from where he told his friend that he was. The people he was suppose to be was not home. Went to the police department and they told me since he was 18 there was nothing that they could do, not even if he was mentally ill. They did say they would watch out for his truck that he was driving to make sure all the paper work was in order. I even showed them the paper work I had from his doctor. Still nothing. Just keep praying for us. We stopped at a convenience store on the way back and the lady said she thought he looked familiar, took my name and number and said she would call if she spotted him. We have gotten more help from the public than the police.

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subyu62 Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 2:27am
post #47 of 73

Paula,
Please make a call to the police dept. closest to where you heard he is.
Request a wellness check.... should you meet with resistance ask for the shift supervisor. Be specific that you simply want a wellness check as your son is off his meds and you are unable to reach him. There is NO reason they cannot do that for you. I stated before they would not make him come home but they MUST do a wellness check,

If they are still resistant and you want some help let me know.... maybe I can find another route to the wellness check.

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adonisthegreek1 Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 2:45am
post #48 of 73

I am so sorry to hear that your son is missing. I pray that he will be in touch with you soon, and that he will be safe and get the medication that he needs.

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Cakerer Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 3:32am
post #49 of 73

I am so sorry you are dealing with all of this but I'm so thankful that you have had reports that he is safe. I know that doesn't replace having him in your arms but it may be a bit of relief for the time being. You are doing a great job and everything you can to help your son. I will continue to pray for you and your family.

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iamcakin Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 11:50am
post #50 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by subyu62

Paula,
Please make a call to the police dept. closest to where you heard he is.
Request a wellness check.... should you meet with resistance ask for the shift supervisor. Be specific that you simply want a wellness check as your son is off his meds and you are unable to reach him. There is NO reason they cannot do that for you. I stated before they would not make him come home but they MUST do a wellness check,

If they are still resistant and you want some help let me know.... maybe I can find another route to the wellness check.




I strongly agree.
You MUST insist, be persistent, but polite. Have you told them that you fear that he's a danger to himself or others? Just because they say there's nothing they can do, sometimes means there's nothing they WILL do. Many times, tho, the officers just don't KNOW what they can and can't do - it's SO frustrating. Keep trying until you get someone at the police department to listen/help.

And continue to drive around looking, I'm hoping and praying that your paths will cross.

Thank you for taking the time to keep us posted.

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subyu62 Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 1:05pm
post #51 of 73

When you request a wellness check DO NOT ask them about bringing him home. As hard as it is they can't do that because he isn't a minor. With a wellness check they go and speak with him, make sure he seems okay, that he left on his own. They will then tell you he was located and if he appeared to be okay.

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paula1234 Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 4:59pm
post #52 of 73

We have a friend in the police dept. here that is helping us locate him. He is using all his resources to find him, including contacting the out of town police dept. So hopefully by tomorrow I will have some more news.

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Cakerer Posted 8 Jul 2010 , 5:09pm
post #53 of 73

I am so thankful for your friend! Continuing to pray that tomorrow brings great news.

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paula1234 Posted 9 Jul 2010 , 1:10am
post #54 of 73

My oldest son got a call from a friend that was at our local mall and said that she spotted Tanner at a subway sandwich shop. Rushed there could not find him anywhere but got mall security involved. the friend said he was talking to a girl that looked like our neighbor's daughter. Called our neighbor and asked him if he had seen Tanner and he said yes. He said that tanner had bought a truck and brought it to his work and wanted to know if it was a good deal before he paid for it. He told Tanner that he needed to call me. Why did that neighbor call me. I told him what was going on with him and he could be a danger to himself or others. He said if he saw him again he would give me a call.

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Doug Posted 9 Jul 2010 , 1:24am
post #55 of 73

having a major league bi-polar niece who's story could fill a book and she hasn't even turned 30 yet....

is it just possible that Tanner really truly needs to create his own space? One he defines and controls? One where every move, every thought isn't parsed for possible trouble?

It may be that he really does need to get away.

Yes, you are right to be concerned, but -- maybe letting go right now, allowing him his space to figure it out on his own knowing the safety net of family is still there is just what he needs.

Hard to accept, but......maybe...

and yes my niece did the run away from home and family thing -- half-way across the country! -- for almost 5 years. Now back with the family, married and raising her last 2 children (previous 3 having been given up for adoption during that 5 year adventure). HIGH STRESSSSSS for the family, but we survived and it seems to be going most well now.

take hope -- Tanner knows you are concerned -- Tanner seems to be taking care of himself in a logical manner (after all, he bought a truck and got advice first from a trusted friend) He seems to be acting like a normal young man in that sense and in the sense of cutting the apron strings too.

I'm betting that after "a while", Tanner will be back -- but as an adult functioning on his own.

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paula1234 Posted 9 Jul 2010 , 11:51pm
post #56 of 73

Just to update on my son. I took my 20 year old for a job interview today and on the way got a call from the sheriff dept. The officer said he had just talked with tanner and he was ok. I asked him where he saw him at and he said he walked into the sheriff's dept. and told him who he was and that he was ok. The officer asked for identification and tanner showed him his license. The officer told him that he really needed to call home, that he had a mother that was very upset that he left and he needed to call me. Tanner told him he would either call me or come home, so far, neither. Please keep praying for us.

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iamcakin Posted 10 Jul 2010 , 1:18am
post #57 of 73

Thankful he's safe, still praying he returns!

As hard as it is to hear Doug makes some very valid points.

Right now, I'm just very thankful he's okay icon_biggrin.gif

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Karen421 Posted 10 Jul 2010 , 4:53am
post #58 of 73

I am glad he is OK! It does sound like he is thinking clearly, and trying to be responsible. I will keep praying that he stays that way and that he contacts you!

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paula1234 Posted 11 Jul 2010 , 1:43am
post #59 of 73

still no word at all from my son. Hopefully he will come home soon.

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rosiecast Posted 11 Jul 2010 , 10:23pm
post #60 of 73

I'm glad that he's ok. I hope he comes home soon.

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