Oh my goodness, are you married to my husband too? My SIL acts the exact same way! LaBellaFlor got it exactly right: she acts that way because her family allows it. You would never put up with this crap from a regular customer, so don't put up with it from her either, ESPECIALLY when you were already planning on giving her extra discounts. Take her off the special discount list and treat her like a normal customer. She doesn't want to spend a lot of money? She can either go get a coupon or get a more simple design.
I don't know why you seem so upset about the possibility of her ignoring you... sounds like a little bit of a blessing to me! 
Ok, I haven't read through all the responses yet, but I feel like I need to give my advice since I also have a PITA SIL who thinks the world revolves around her. This would be against my better judgement to do with anyone sane though, so that is my little disclaimer. But if you care about your DH and want to make things tolerable for him, sometimes you need to swallow your pride.
With people like this, YOU are always wrong, and they are always right, there is no winning, there is no getting your point across.
Meet with her in person: by phone or email things can be misinterpreted, you need to clear the air face to face, and make sure there are witnesses (your husband and her husband, not so you don't kill her, but so she doesn't turn around to your DH's family and say that you said/did something that you didn't do). You do not need to say "I am sorry" but say, "I am sorry you feel this way", that way you don't need to feel like you lowered yourself to apologize for something you didn't do, but rather you regret that she feels this way. Be sympathetic to her cause, or at least pretend to be. Tell her that you really wanted to give her the best possible price for the cake, but unfortunately you need a coupon to give her the deepest possible discount since there needs to be some sort of "paper trail". Maybe you could offer to get the coupon for her, to make it easier, afterall as I mentioned the world revolves around her, so why should she lift a finger, right?
I know it is hard to swallow your pride- I have been there myself not too long ago, but I think it is really important to clear the air for your relationship with your DH and his family. Remember that you are doing it for him, not her!
Whew, sorry that was long!
No one deserves to be treated poorly by another just because you are related or are trying to "keep the peace." Don't get me wrong, I strive for happiness all the way around, but it sounds like she and your husband don't mind making you less important to get what they want. I don't get mad, I get even! 
No one deserves to be treated poorly by another just because you are related or are trying to "keep the peace." Don't get me wrong, I strive for happiness all the way around, but it sounds like she and your husband don't mind making you less important to get what they want. Yes, that stands out a mile - well said indeed. I don't get mad, I get even!
So did Ivana Trump - lol lol
Bluehue 
I can't believe I"m wasting my energy on this thread about someone who is SO drama queen in a family that teaches her it's ok to act like that.
Why the HELL are you even worried about it? She might not speak to you for months? Woooooo-whoooooo!!! JAckpot!!! 
If it was me, I'd be TRYING to find ways to piss her off so she'd leave me alone.
Give her a ticket to the Jerry Springer show .... THAT audience will appreciate the antics of someone like her.
**** her.
don't feed the drama llama!
Love it! 
Ok, I'm a newbie, but I'm going to add my 2 cents... this is no longer about her getting a cake at a reduced price, it's about her having control over her brother and you not being first in your husband's life. She is a control freak and will do anything to run all situations; she really doesn't want the cake, she just wants the final outcome to be in her best interest. Don't give her the cake, don't call her. Yes, you will be the bad guy (in her eyes only), but I know you will come out on top in the end. I've been there.
well, it sounds like sooner or later you will end up on this SIL sh**t list, so why suck up to her about making this cake... she said, 'forget it' , so if she brings it up, say , you told me to forget it, so i did'... everybody in the family knows she is like this, so it's not like they will be on her side... laurie
Don't mean to sound like a snot here but I'm not going to bother reading all the posts. Your SIL has already shown her real colors. She's not only like this with you but with her father too. Probably everyone has to cow tow to her or they're left in her dust. If I were you I'd stand up to her right now, while there's a chance so she knows she's not going to walk over you. She won't change. If she said "forget it" about this cake I'd do just that, forget it. Forget she ever asked about a cake. I mean as if it never happened.
I made my nieces wedding cake 5 years ago and she got mad about it, never gave me any specifics, and said it wasn't anything like what she wanted except the heart shape. In fact is WAS what she asked for except I couldn't place the roses between the separators exactly the way she wanted them because she snipped the stems completely off so all they'd do was roll around. I didn't know this until I got to the site to set up. Thankfully I had baby's breath to stuff tightly into the space to hold the roses in place. Also everything was outside in October, it was freezing out (like in the 40's) with about 30 mph winds and she wanted petals scattered on the top and around the edge of the other tiers. I glued some petals down and put the rest around the tiers and on the table sure that most would be blown away. As it turned out nothing blew off. It still was very pretty but she was not happy. Never thanked me for it in person. I found out months later that she wasn't happy. She went so far as to tell me that there were several times when she felt like telling me to forget it altogether. I wish she had. I did a wedding cake here (KS) for a Sat. wedding, went home and packed my car and drove to CA the next day to start working on her cake. I could have actually enjoyed the week with my sis before the wedding if I hadn't been working on her cake in a strange kitchen. I forgave her my hurt feelings but we don't talk cakes. I go to her little boys b-day parties 3 times a year and always tell her the cake she made is cute because it is.
Life is too short to mess with relatives or non-relatives like this.
My discount policy goes like this: If I feel like giving one I will. No blanket discounts for anyone.
Maybe you could offer to get the coupon for her, to make it easier, after all as I mentioned the world revolves around her, so why should she lift a finger, right?
I know it is hard to swallow your pride- I have been there myself not too long ago, but I think it is really important to clear the air for your relationship with your DH and his family. Remember that you are doing it for him, not her!
I wasn't going to comment again but man..........
Swallow your pride?? Stand up to her now or forget about ever trying later on. She'll have you peg as one more doormat. My MIL drove me nuts until I had an honest talk with her and we have been closer than I am with my own mother for 40 years now. Don't do it for your dh do it for you! He has a relationship with her already. He's a big boy he can handle himself. You are the new kid in the family and you need to establish that you aren't going to be a second class citizen, now form the get go. You can expect more of the same if you don't. Good luck!
Swallow your pride?? Stand up to her now or forget about ever trying later on. She'll have you peg as one more doormat. My MIL drove me nuts until I had an honest talk with her and we have been closer than I am with my own mother for 40 years now.
abso-freakin'-lutely! My MIL tried something 2 weeks before our wedding and hubby was all hand-wringing about "what do we do? what do we do?" I said, "Nothing. I get along with your mom great but if I give in to her on this, I'l be giving in to her for the rest of my life. And I'm not going to do that."
I LUV my MIL.
And how come in these situations, everyone's advice is always "0h just give in and let the bitch have her way for the sake of keeping the peace." She's a spoiled brat and letting her have her way "to keep the peace" is the same as letting your 4 year old live on Hostess Ding Dongs and staying up until 2:00 a.m. so he/she doesn't scream all night. She's throwing a tantrum and everyone is letting her. SOME-body has to stand up and "be a parent" by telling her "The party's over, babycakes!"
I am sorry.... I do not kiss no one's a** if you get mad oh well... too bad if you can not come and talk to me like a grown up... then I do not have time for you. I will give you the silent treatment and my cheek will always be turned. I have that problem right now with my MIL you ask me for my opinion... well you will get it I do not sugar coat NOTHING. I will not side with you if you are clearly wrong. And don't try to get my husband to turn against me in your favor NOT gonna happen. Well that is what is happening in my crazy life. but this is my intake on it treat me like sh** then you will get the same treatment. Last week was her birthday, the week before my husband and kids went to visit her, I met them after I made my cake delivery and closed the shop for the day. Did she not say hello to me when I arrived heck NO.... she acted like I wasn't there. Hmm.. so I am the one that goes and buys presents, cards, and shops for gifts.... did she miss out this year YES... of course I do not reward for bad behavior NOT I will not put up with that from anyone of my family my side or his. My time and money are valued to much by me. The same thing should be for your situation. Glad to hear I am not alone.
Sorry for the long vent I guess I have had that bottled up too long LOL!
She won't talk to you? Great! I have a sister who the world revolves around her and she was mad at me, my other siblings were jealous of me! dont let her step on you ever!
I get along much better with my MIL now that she is dead....oops, did i say that out loud?
O.K. after much consideration of everything that was said here. THANKS LADIES!!!! I tried two times to catch her after her classes (which by the way are to become an EMT which is what I have been doing for 6 yrs now but 3 months after she met me she started EMT classes, coinsidence I think NOT) and at her home but I couldn't catch her I guess she was with her "FRIEND" while her husband and daughter were at home if you get my meaning. So then i sent this text.
"I've been trying 2 catch u at school r home but keep missin u I honestly think u misinterpreted my intentions about both discounts so now that we both have had time to chill give me a call when u can."
Showed it to my husband and he suggested adding "call when you can please" and I said NO I am not begging her to call me and that is what that sounds like. So he agreed
Then he suggested adding"I really want to save our friendship" And again I said NO, That makes it sound like I'm in the wrong and again like I'm begging to be her friend and if I let her run over me this time then it will never stop once I let her get away with it. So he said to send it the way it was.
I have a wonderful husband who would never take her side over mine. I think she will be suprised when she realizes this fact.
About 15 min later she texted me "Its really ok., dnt worry about.
SO I'm not I'm finished she is not getting a cake from me.
BTW there was a 3rd choice in the poll but it didn't show up It was ignore her all together.
One Final thought (for sugalips) I don't get mad or get even I GET AHEAD. lol
Thanks again ladies It felt good to have support and opinions from so many of you. 
GirlI kno im kinda late but I would tell her to kiss my a** and u dont have a business by giving ur cakes away! People like that jsut piss me off! Id tell her if she doesnt like the fact that u have to buy ur supplies and take ur time to make cakes and u have business partners that u have to split money with then she can buy all of ur stuff, pay them their money, spend her time makin it, and ull gladly let her have it!! LOL!
GirlI kno im kinda late but I would tell her to kiss my a** and u dont have a business by giving ur cakes away! People like that jsut piss me off! Id tell her if she doesnt like the fact that u have to buy ur supplies and take ur time to make cakes and u have business partners that u have to split money with then she can buy all of ur stuff, pay them their money, spend her time makin it, and ull gladly let her have it!! LOL!
I guess she was with her "FRIEND" while her husband and daughter were at home if you get my meaning.
This sounds like you might be ready to tread where you should not. Where this type of comment could be going has nothing to do with the cake and could do far more damage than ever could place over a cake. Best be careful!!
Quote by @%username% on %date%
%body%