I Bequeath To The Cake Decorating Forum

Decorating By leah_s Updated 23 Aug 2009 , 11:49pm by KKristy

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leah_s Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 1:59am
post #1 of 39

the Friday Night Cake Club.

I am still completely pissed off about a dust up on another Forum, and I will miss you guys talking about all your cool cakes tonight. If and when I calm down I'll be back.

Until then, someone please take over.

38 replies
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Deb_ Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:15am
post #2 of 39

Leah, I for one am hoping that you'll reconsider and come back to the forums..........you are always very helpful to all of us.

I'm pretty sure I know of the thread you're speaking of. I myself have been "chastised" by other members here for always bringing up the importance and appropriateness of becoming licensed/legal before selling cakes.

I will NEVER back down from this advice and frankly I too am tired of all of the unlicensed bakers making ME feel like I'm wrong for suggesting that they NOT charge for their cakes until they're licensed.

I guess this "age of entitlement" is reaching the cake world too. icon_rolleyes.gif

I hope to see you around here, don't let the few bad eggs on here keep you away.

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MaryAnnPriest Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:27am
post #3 of 39

Yeah, what dkelly said! I know what post to which you are referring. I was really surprised by the response. My line of thinking is that if you are not able or willing to accept all advice from the question one puts forward, then don't post your question.

As a hobbyist in the cake world, I have absorb tons of info here especially from you. (Finally took the leap and went the SPS way because of you! Love it! I have not worried about a cake making it to a family function since.) I can understand taking a break when emotions are to high, but please return soon. You will be missed!

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Lenette Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:32am
post #4 of 39

I do not know for sure what happened but I am very sorry that you are leaving. You have a wealth of knowledge to share that folks here will miss out on.

I hope that you will be willing to return soon. It is hard to read the forums here sometimes. I can understand your being upset.

It is sad that so many members have left here. The ones that have been lost were all so helpful. Perhaps this is a good time for all of us to step back and remember why we are here.

I have learned so much from CC and I appreciate having somewhere to go with questions and for inspiration. I know I wouldn't be where I am with my business without CC.

People are people and we are going to disagree which is okay. I think we all benefit from the info and members here.

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MnSnow Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:34am
post #5 of 39


WE NEED YOU!!!! icon_cry.gif

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Teekakes Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:53am
post #6 of 39

You know, I am not taking any side one way or another but I would like to say this; Cake Central was not created for anyone to be chastised for being a legal cake baker, or not a legal cake baker. Cake Central, to the best of my knowledge, was not created for just "legalized bakeries" nor was it created for just "non-legalized bakeries". If someone other than another "legal" cake person bothers a person then maybe that person should simply not say anything at all regarding the subject. Like you, Deb, I too read the thread I think Leahs is referring to and can find nothing in the OP's question that had anything to do with being legal or not legal. So why should anything about legal/not legal have even been said. There is no point in taking a subject off into the weeds and making an entirely separate issue out of it.
A person being licensed to do what they do does not necessarily make that person more knowledgeable than someone not licensed but with equal or greater than experience.
I am many years beyond the "age of entitlement" group you are speaking of and I don't agree with that attitude either. I ignore those remarks as quickly as I ignore the remarks on the opposite end of the spectrum. Nobody knows it all, and a know-it-all knows nobody. Neither end of these two spectrums are well accepted by the general public.
Everyone needs to simply think about what their reply is going to contribute before it is posted.
Hateful, rude, mean and nasty never did make a friend that will stick by ones side.

Just my thoughts on a dead horse subject that I rarely ever jump in to....not sure why I did this time. icon_rolleyes.gif I guess I just wish this kind of meaningless behavior would come to a stop on CC.
We are all here because of one common interest....the love of the art of cake decorating.....without any one of us being any better or worse than the next. thumbs_up.gif

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Deb_ Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 3:31am
post #7 of 39

Well when a question is posted in the "cake decorating business" forum asking about pricing/selling I think it's very helpful to tell that person that before they sell they need to look into licensing requirements in their state/county.

Many people that join this site have no idea that it may be illegal to sell cakes from their homes without the proper licensing.

I'm not sure why some people become so defensive when that little annoying bit of information is brought up. It's just part of the business side of things.

BTW....I don't see where leah was hateful, rude, mean or nasty. She is a professional business owner who always gives out helpful information on these forums......I'm pretty sure she knows a lot because she's living this "business". I'm grateful that she's so willing to share her knowledge with me. I'd be proud to have her as my "friend" stuck to my side. icon_wink.gif

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indydebi Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 3:52am
post #8 of 39
Originally Posted by Teekakes

A person being licensed to do what they do does not necessarily make that person more knowledgeable than someone not licensed but with equal or greater than experience.

If you factor in that leahs has shared that she was an unlicensed baker that was busted by the health dept, then I would hope you'd conceed that she is more knowledgeable than most in this regard. She takes it very seriously and doesn't want anyone else to go thru that. As dkelly says, many people don't realize it is not legal to sell from your home in many states. It is sharing info, which is why we come to CC ... to share our recipes, techniques, knowledge and experience.

Sometimes it is mentioned that the OP didn't ask about this-or-that. If the logic is that we can only answer the question that was asked, I predict there will be problems with cakes. I've seen many threads where question A is asked, but the answer to question A many times leads to "....but be careful if you do that because of the following factors." This is no different from "I want to start a business out of my home....what should I charge?" and the answer being "Charge the going rate for your area but be sure it's legal for you to sell out of your home."

If that's the direction we take, I predict a lot of threads in which folks come back very irritated because "....well no one TOLD me that!" icon_eek.gif

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Teekakes Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 3:57am
post #9 of 39

I understand what you are saying. But on the opposite side, what does her price question have to do with being legal or not? She ask a question about the price of her product and had no inquiry whatsoever about being legal or not legal. Again, keeping to the point of OP's question, only, and not getting off into the weeds with another subject.

It's not so much that people get defensive over a subject, but rather the manor in which it was spoken/typed...........again, the question was never answered. In the reply, had a market price been given this would never have happened. In addition to a fair market price being given perhaps the legal issue could have been injected into the subject with something like "Be sure to know your local laws regarding selling baked goods outside of friends and family and in to the public! icon_biggrin.gif
This lends a friendly, suggestive and helpful approach to the subject of whether one should be legal or not, depending on where they live. It opens a door for the person to walk through and ask questions regarding the subject.

Referencing the rude/mean/nasty............I never even came close to implying Leah was acting in any of these manors. That is for each reader of the thread to determine.
The reference is to the MANY threads turn hateful/rude/mean and nasty here at CC. icon_smile.gif

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Suzycakes Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 4:05am
post #10 of 39

I totally agree with Leahs, dkelley, indydebi and MAPriest!! I saw the thread as it was unfolding and my first thought was "If you don't want to hear someones advise then don't ask!" You can work for 30 days straight gathering pricing, costs and making spreadsheets -- BUT if you can't legally sell cakes from your home - then you're wasting time!!

The OP of the other thread didn't know how lucky she was that Leahs was on and one of the first to respond to her question. Leahs is a wealth of knowledge and so willing to share and help anyone who asks. You can go through 100's of threads and you will find Leahs giving information, suggestions and encouragement every day. But Leahs also has done everything legally and by the book and she expects everyone else to do the same - as we all should. My opinion tonight is the same as it was when the **it hit the fan -- the OP owes Leahs an apology.

As far as I'm concerned -- If Leahs is not conducting the FNCC -- then it needs to come to a close. FNCC is her baby -- if she's not on then i don't care anything about participating in it. There have been several Friday nights when I haven't had any cakes to work on -- but I always get on and read and see what Leahs and everyone else is up to. I almost didn't look tonight -- but gave it a shot and found this thread.

Leahs - I know you're pissed - you have every right to be. Look at it this way - you are going to be here next month, next year and the year after that -- I have to wonder how long the OP of the other thread will be 'in business' if they don't like to take advise they don't want to hear!


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all4cake Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 4:41am
post #11 of 39

Okay...I sure hope the dust settles soon 'cause, Leah, at around 10:30p.m. on Fridays, your ass needs to be here bringing the FNCC to order! Everybody has a view on somethin' and it ain't always gonna be in line with everyone elses' thinkin'...

If I ain't right on nothin' else, can ya'll agree that I am right on this one????

Most times, when I make a comment, either I ain't sayin'(typin') it right or it ain't bein' taken the way I intended....no one on here knows me well enough to say "oh, she didn't mean it like that." or "huh? oh, I know what she meant now." which usually leaves me explaining what I meant or leaving the electrified field alone.

Use your finger and your thumb and dig your panties out, roll your eyes and get back in here and play with us!

(for anyone who hasn't figured it out, I am sayin' all this in fun but I'm serious...I don't mean to offend anyone)

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LaBellaFlor Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 4:56am
post #12 of 39

I agree with Teekakes. She is not wrong in her opinion. I defiently don't like the whole "age of entitlement" attitude. No one I know of on here is old enough to be my mother. I also feel that it's life expierence, not neccessarily age that brings wisdom. I know some really young dumb people and I know some really old (and 50 is not an age I consider very old) dumb people. I also know some really wise young people, just like I know some really wise older people. Also, maybe we should answer just the question thats asked. If there are wondering about legalities, I'm sure they will ask, as plenty of people have asked those very questions.

I also agree with leahs. She's just imparting her knowlege. I personally have never read her coming off as just flat out rude or just beating someone on the subject of beng legal. She always mentions it first and then proceeds to answer the question that is asked. Can she seem a little blunt, yes. But why is that a bad thing.

In the long run I feel A LOT of people are just flat out being TOO SENSITIVE! It has been expressed many times that the business forum is where people are going to "keep it real". I have seen people be flat out rude in their initial response and we all know that is just stupid, cause it's so uneccessary. I have seen people complaing about people not getting comments are being favorited on their pictures, though they have many views or HAVE been favorited many times on some cakes, but not all cakes. I have seen people ask for COMPLETE directions on how to make a wedding cake. If you don't know the basics, why did you offer to make something that can be as challenging as a wedding cake?! I think everyone needs to take a step back, think about what they are asking and just take the responses for what they are, just opinions. I think we should think about how we may respond sometimes. But I definetly think this being overly sensitive NEEDS TO STOP! And leahs I enjoy you a lot on this site. I like your honesty. But I have to admit, I am very surprised that you won't come on here anymore, cause someone else. I don't know what happened on another thread, I don't know if it was the one that you said, "Thats the last straw", I just know you are stonger then this.

By the way, working on a 2-tiered whimsy cake. icon_smile.gif

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NatiMF30 Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:04am
post #13 of 39

Wow, I am saddened to see something like difference of opinion and the law make people upset or leave such a wonderful forum that was created to, "share our recipes, techniques, knowledge and experience" (indydebi). But "the law" has done worse to people.

I do not want to see such talent leave the forum and by the looks of it many others feel the same so this is an opportunity for us CCer's to take a stand and show who we really are! What I mean is if Leahs needs an apology (tho she did not ask for one) by golly let's give her one!

Leahs, I am so sorry that you were hurt, offended or pissed off by one these forum posts! You are a great, knowledgeable woman and we need you! Please reconsider your leaving and stay a while longer.

Now CCer's let's step up and show that we aren't just a bunch of drama Queen's/King's but passionate about what we do and that we appreciate all answers that people are willing to take the time to give so we can be the best at what we do!

Thank you and good night!

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diane Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:13am
post #14 of 39
Originally Posted by leahshasleft

the Friday Night Cake Club.

I am still completely pissed off about a dust up on another Forum, and I will miss you guys talking about all your cool cakes tonight. If and when I calm down I'll be back.

Until then, someone please take over.

i've have been on cc since 2005 and i've seen many who've left because of things like this. all i have to say is...why in the world are you letting it get to you?? so what...let them say what they want. they know they are doing wrong and it's irks them to have someone point it out to them. take a breather...do what you need to calm yourself...and then return! thumbs_up.gif

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all4cake Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:14am
post #15 of 39

See there...seriously, you need to bring this thing to order! I completely forgot to share that I'm supposed to be working on a smash cake...that's it...I ain't even interested in doing it.

I got bummed out earlier about another cake issue ("oh, I know about how much the cake is going to cost...thank you for trying to save me some money...but this is the cake set up I will be getting...I know it's going to cost more....(for freakin' months! still, never committed....no deposit(kinda friend thing))...finally I was given the actual numbers....leave the quote on her cell phone(so she could swallow it(I just kneeeeeeeeew it would be hard for her handle regardless of what she'd said earlier))...TODAY...she calls me back basically wanting to know WTF???? "see what you can do for me for $___(which happens to be less than half!) I told her that that was BASE PRICE. She said she'd get back with me...lol...in a couple of weeks....LOL...her wedding is 5 weeks away right now...lol...I told her to call around..."you do know, even Wal~Mart does wedding cakes, right?" 4 tiered cake with a trail of multi-colored gp roses& buds, 12 dozen cupcakes with a gumpaste bud on each, and a 1/2 sheet groom's cake...she wanted it all for $250!!!!!!!!!....I'm sorry...I'm still bummed...not about not doing her order but about how understanding about how costly(even though total wasn't given...she knew per serv price and the cost of the ccs and the flowers and the gc...all she had to do was multiply her guest count by the ps cost and get a guesstimate..KWIM?)...I want a freakin' Mary Alice!!!!

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GenGen Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:29am
post #16 of 39

ah leah, i wouldn't let things like that get to you.. takes more effort and energy to stress and fret over it then it does to shrug it off, or ignore it and move on. not saying your not entitled to feel something..


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Lenette Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 1:41pm
post #17 of 39

You know what I don't get is this (seriously, don't get it --not trying to offend):

If a person chooses not to be licensed then it is their decision, own it, be okay with it. Why be pissed when someone points out that in many areas it is not legal. I mean, generally speaking, no one is being called out on it on a personal level. There is general discussion and the licensing issue is brought up and then folks get mad.


Most of the time a person such as Leah is simply saying know the rules for your area and follow them. Well, information never hurt anyone and many have been pleasantly surprised after talking to the HD.

Now, if a person chooses not to investigate, or not to follow the regulations, etc etc. Again, you are an adult, made an adult choice and it was yours to make. Just own that decision. Don't get mad when others are just trying to inform.

I see too that many folks don't know you need to be licensed, are we not supposed to put that info out there for those that need it because someone else doesn't want to hear it?

And another thing I don't get is why questions are asked in the business forum then someone gets up in arms when a business owner answers with a business perspective. That one really confuses me!

I just don't get the anger and resentment from some of the members here. And yea, we have people here who are blunt. Take it for what it is, information. On the thread that was referenced, perhaps Leah was in a hurry so she just got down what equates to bullet points to get the info out there.
A lot of cakers just jump on here for a quick break and may not have time at that moment to type out a longer response.

And I agree with LaBellaFlor, I am a pretty sensitive person, but CC is getting a bit over the top lately.

I'm done rambling now, sorry! I just hate to see yet another member leaving here like this.

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Deb_ Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:04pm
post #18 of 39

"I have been trying to create a pricing matrix but feel that my pricing is coming out higher than it should be. Does anyone have a suggestion/format that they use? Also, I am not a licensed baker - I do it out of my home, but how do you reserve a name for the purpose of business cards etc and just where do I start if I want to become liscensed?"

The above is the OP's question from the other thread that we are all referencing.

As noted in bold print, she has clearly stated that she is "not a licensed baker" and that she wants to know "where do I start if I want to become licensed".

So for those of you who said Leah, brought up the legal/illegal topic, you're wrong. She was directly answering the OP's question. She didn't "just bring it up".

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Shelle_75 Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 2:53pm
post #19 of 39

And, as stated about, she was in the Business Forum. A place, we all know, was declared (by Leah herself, I think) to be kitten, puppy, and rainbow free a long time ago. If you're going to go into business, the first item you should purchase is a pair of big-girl panties.

Leah, please come back. You might not always give us what we want to hear, but you ALWAYS give us THE TRUTH.

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LaBellaFlor Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 3:01pm
post #20 of 39

Not just Leah, but SEVERAL people have declared it the kitten,puppy, and rainbow free zone!!! What gives?!?

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Motta Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 3:48pm
post #21 of 39

Leah - please take your time to think it over and calm down, whatever it takes. BUT please don't leave us. I respect your advice so much and you've selflessly helped us all so much already eg. SPS instructions. I would hate to lose someone so experienced from this forum. It's purely selfish on my part but I know this community too would benefit greatly from you staying on and it would suffer with your absence.

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Ruth0209 Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 4:12pm
post #22 of 39

Leah, I too hope you'll decide to continue to participate on CC. There are several names I look for in the forums because I know the information is professional and accurate, and yours is one of them.

CC is the only place I've ever participated in forums, and I was plain shocked at first at how touchy people can be when they ask for advice, then don't get the answer they want. My philosophy has always been that I don't ask a question unless I actually want an answser to it, and then I have to be prepared to possibly hear things that differ with my opinion. If I don't want people telling me I'm wrong, then I just don't ask.

Anyone who has read the forums for 5 minutes has to know that saying they're not licensed (which at least implies that they know maybe they're supposed to be) is like tossing a match into a haystack. You'd better stand back because you have to know that your eyelashes are about to get scorched!

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grandmom Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 4:24pm
post #23 of 39

I agree with the sentiments of the posts in support of Leah. Please don't take that to mean that I am against the OP, it's just that it is really hard to read intention into email. I just wish that people wouldn't try so hard to read intention - unless someone directly calls you a dunderheaded idiot, assume the best intentions. Sometimes all caps is just for emphasis - not yelling!

While I respect the advice and answers of all those who take the time and effort to help, there are a few who rise to a truly professional level, and Leah is one of them. I particularly value her experience and knowledge because she is just 50 miles down the road from my town.

Leah, if you're listening... please reconsider.

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Caths_Cakes Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 4:52pm
post #24 of 39

Ive no idea about the whole buisness side of it.

But very very sad to see such a knowledgeable helpful person lost from this sight. Always willing to share her knowledge to help others when she could easily say. pfft im not telling my trade secrets. Sorry to see you go leahs icon_sad.gif X

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sadsmile Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:00pm
post #25 of 39

I have been seeing this lots. Specifically talking about how the typed word is taken/understood and read. And I have seen a lot of times where people read so much into a short and to the point message and say the poster was being mean. I tend to type like I talk but I know you can't hear the chuckle/seriousness in my voice or see the implied mischief/concern in my eyes to know absolutely when I am joking or being serious. It's REALLY confusing sometimes! And it is sad to see these misunderstandings construed out of shape. I think it is also emotion tempering responses. Like if someone didn't like what was said they are more inclined to believe the other person was being mean or hurtful. But her on this side of the screen it is in actuality hard to determine in short and to the point messages, like Leahs, if she was being mean at all. Stick around Leahs or I'll, I'll... icon_razz.gif stick my toung out at you!!!! icon_wink.gif

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playingwithsugar Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:24pm
post #26 of 39

Two years ago, I had suggested a list of topics that should be banned from discussion here on CC, as they always cause arguments. Legal/illegal was one of them. I probably read this particular thread, probably put a watch on it, maybe even participated in it, but there have been so many of them lately that I don't recall a specific one.

LeahS, I am so sorry to learn about this. I have been bitten at a few times in my years here over things I've said, too, so I know how ticked off you are.

I want you to know that I respect your opinion regarding this particular subject.

I hope that you can resolve this issue in your heart, and return to us soon. And you know, if you need to vent, you can always PM me directly.

Theresa icon_smile.gif

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leah_s Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:26pm
post #27 of 39

You have humbled me completely with your kind words both in this thread, by PM, and email. And many of you correctly pointed out - it's often difficult to "hear" the typed word, on both sides. I missed you all last night and I'll be back next Friday Night to call us to order for the FNCC. You'd better be here!!

Big girl panties are now unwadded. icon_smile.gif

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NatiMF30 Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:50pm
post #28 of 39


I did not know there was a FNCC until I read this post and, after reading what everyone has posted, I definitely want to be a part of it!

Glad you are back and in action Leahs! I will always wear my BGP's and keep them wad free!

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playingwithsugar Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 5:55pm
post #29 of 39
Originally Posted by NatiMF30


I did not know there was a FNCC until I read this post and, after reading what everyone has posted, I definitely want to be a part of it!

Glad you are back and in action Leahs! I will always wear my BGP's and keep them wad free!

Just an FYI to you, NatiF30, and all others - you do not have to be working on a project in order to participate. You can be surfing design ideas, reading threads, anything. It's nice to have people around to encourage the Friday-nighters and procrastinators to keep plugging on.

Leah - welcome back. We'll see you Friday night.

Theresa icon_smile.gif

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jenng1482 Posted 22 Aug 2009 , 6:23pm
post #30 of 39

Oh thank goodness!! Last night was my biggest project ever and there was no FNCC to help me thru it icon_cry.gif It was a 3 tier main wedding cake and 30 (yes 3-0) 8" rounds for the tables!! I'm so glad the club will be reinstated! icon_biggrin.gif

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