It's going to be hard to outdo the hat box cake, but you have to! 
I would have your mom tell the aunt that you will make a cake "fancy or not" that you think your Grandmother will love and when it's time for her (the aunt) birthday if you're asked to make HER cake, you'll be sure and NOT make it fancy as to be sure and save all that sugar that otherwise would have gone to waste!
This is exactly what I was thinking! 
Go ahead and make the fanciest cake you want to for your Grandmother, then when it's Aunt Nasty's birthday, make her a plain sheetcake. And I mean PLAIN, no color, no borders, no writing, just plain flat white iced cake. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Tell her you know that she doesn't like to waste sugar, so you kept it simple for her!!!
Is your aunt a diabetic? If so, maybe she knows she shouldn't be eating sweets so she's pis....I mean raining...on everyone else's parade? Don't let it bother you. You aren't making the cake for her anyway. If your grandma loves it, that's all that counts.
Hope your phone call went well...
I think I can guess what your aunt's problem is. I read all the remarks and then looked at the hatbox cake.
Before I opened it up, I pretended that I was my grandmother---who is 80 something, and one of the most tactless people I know, other than my MIL.
The cake is beyond gorgeous! You did a great job and I can only hope to ever do something that phenomenal.
But the grandmother that I was thinking like didn't understand the fact that the cake was just the hat box. Why make everything else if you can't eat it? It's only art, for pete's sake. There's no use in art. Sure, you can take a picture of it, but you can't keep it. Why bother?
At which point I told my inner granny to stuff it. *LOL*
Edited to point out that I SO do not agree with your aunt and that I've been annoying my grandmother's sensibilities for years with "all that art nonsense". 
Dear Auntie:
Thanks for your concern about how much money *I* spend for cakes *I* pay for. However, when you pay my bills then you can tell me how to do. In the meantime, I'll be very happy to bend over to make it easier for you to kiss my a$$.
See you at the party. I'll be the one with the BIG, OVER THE TOP CAKE! (but then ... I tend to take the wise-a$$ approach to things!)
Ok, I looked at that cake. It's jaw droppingly beautiful. Is it possible that your aunt knew how much time and effort it took you (especially with four kids at home) and was just trying to make sure you didn't kill yourself trying to make another one? I can see any of my aunts saying the same thing but meaning it kindly.
sorry if this is repeated...I am in rush today and didn't read all the other post. but I am a bit onrey or Bitchy even. I'd take a plain cake right out of the pan. no frosting. no nothing. tell her you appreciate the offer of saving all your sugar.
then later in the day, I'd present nanna with her beautiful cake.
old people. my mother-in-law likes to give me that kind of "help" also.
melody
Okay so I tried to stand back and TRY and see where your dear ole Auntie was coming from..and I couldnt!
She was off base by saying what she said. I'm sorry. ~~~HUGS~~~
If you want to go over board then you do it. There not paying you and if it's your gift to Nanny then go over board if you want!
Its a shame you can't make a 92 layer cake....lol Sometimes people don't realize what they say how it will affect a person, I don't think they mean any harm but its the way it comes out. Continue to honor your nanny anyone that lives 92 years deserves to feel special on their b-day that's our problem we take so much in life for granted especially our loved ones.
Good luck and God Bless you and your nanny!!!!!!!!!
well...after looking at your cakes...i'd say she's a bit jealous of your talent. you don't do the ordinary sheet cake, but far more than that. non-cakesters know nothing except the ordinary, same ol' same ol', typical cake.
i wouldn't let it bother you. this is just her way of saying "WOW...YOU'VE GOT TALENT!"...in her jealous kinda way! 
Did you pick up the phone??????????
I agree with the other posters...I'd make the cake however I felt like making it if I were in your shoes. I wouldn't think twice about what aunt said...she ain't payin' for it so even if she was being snarky, I'd let it roll right off...but reading through your postings here, I would think she meant for you not to go to so much trouble, in a considerate way.
I couldn't help it, I had to make time to go back and read all the post.
I may be the only one here, who might MIGHT understand this aunt. like I said, she reminds me of my mother-in-law. have I mentioned that my dear helpful mil lives across the street from me? and looks out her binoculars to watch my house, so she can call my husband and scream at him if it looks like we might tear something up?
at my own house. grrrr
anyway, this comment would have come right out of her mouth and she really would have thought she was "helping" me.
helping me save my time, and money. she would also suggest that I just run to walmart instead and pick something up. 
feeling you girl.
melody
Make what you feel your Nanny would love. I lost my Nannie a couple of two years ago and thankfully I made her favorite cake for her last holiday she was with us and it was a recipe she handed down to me. She was tickled pink. She is the reason I love to bake and I know what it meant to her to have me make it. Don't worry about what others think or say for that matter.
OMG - sounds just like my sanctified and holy aunt who never has anything good to say about anyone but her kids... She insists on being in charge of my grandmothers annual birthday party (she will be 93 on her next so I know how blessed you feel that she is still with you) and gives granny gifts of plates and t-shirts with her picture on it. Make the presentation special, everyone else has to be quiet...I don't bother to lift a finger, which irriatetes her to no end because when I am at my dad's I cook really big and special meals for everyone. She does a sheet cake for every family reunion, but can't spell 'r-e-u-n-i-o-n', I could go on...
All those flashbacks aside, I would act like I was only asked to do a cake and know nothing about the other comment. Kill her with kindness. Works every time.
OMG! I made a HUGE mistake in my last post. Your cake is so perfectly done, I didn't realize the "platform" that everything was sitting on was cake, too! Honestly, when I looked at it the first time, I thought the bottom cake was just a cake board covered in fondant! Even my grandmother might have trouble justifying that as a waste of sugar. 
You did great and I hope you annoy the he!! out of your aunt this year.
Well, now! I see she's going all out for the party with her veggie baked bean dish! Probably doesn't want anyone else putting forth more effort than she's going to.
I really think it's a generational thing, too.
Hope it got straightened out.
Your hat box cake ROCKS!!!! (and I love the gift box cake too btw!) If I were you, I'd make the fanciest cake I could for Nanny's birthday (although the Mother's Day one was pretty darn fancy!)
This is for your grandmother...not anyone else.
Sorry you have to deal with relatives like this!
I see she's going all out for the party with her veggie baked bean dish!
I missed her veggie bean thing! Add to that the "wasted sugar" comment and I assume she's one of those healthy eaters who thinks it's her place in life to educate everyone else on how they SHOULD be eating. 
I would have your mom tell the aunt that you will make a cake "fancy or not" that you think your Grandmother will love and when it's time for her (the aunt) birthday if you're asked to make HER cake, you'll be sure and NOT make it fancy as to be sure and save all that sugar that otherwise would have gone to waste!
This is exactly what I was thinking!
Go ahead and make the fanciest cake you want to for your Grandmother, then when it's Aunt Nasty's birthday, make her a plain sheetcake. And I mean PLAIN, no color, no borders, no writing, just plain flat white iced cake. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Tell her you know that she doesn't like to waste sugar, so you kept it simple for her!!!
Don't even ice it! And leave the sugar out of the cake
My first thought is that she felt upstaged and felt like you got all the attention for the cake and she didn't get enough/any for planning the party. Now that she's doing it again, I would think the remark was made to keep you from stealing the show with another cake. You surely put as much work into the cake as she did into the party, if not more. I would make whatever you think would make your grandmother feel good. She has a limited number of birthdays left and it's her your celebrating, not your aunt, and she can get over it.
Make a beautiful tower of sugar for your nanny that says on one side "Happy 92nd Birthday Nanny!", and on the other side "Enough Sugar for You Auntie?"! Just make sure you place the cake correctly so that the messages are facing the correct people!
My first thought about what your aunt said was maybe your gift of the cake was so special that her gift paled in comparison. Then I remembered my husbands old maid aunt that said whatever she felt no matter how much it hurt. It was always a control thing with her. She had no husband or children and never learned to respect other peoples feelings. She just barked out orders and waited for the family to follow her orders.
I would make whatever cake you feel your grandmother would love and tell your aunt that when you give a gift it is your choice not anyone else's and when she pays you to make a cake then she can choose the decoration.
Hehe I think the beans are Bush's and she is just saying what kind she is using and nothing more.
I didn't pick up the phone when she called...LOL I may like to watch drama but i don't want to be in the middle of it. I did think it funny that I had emailed my mom with complaints about it and then my phone rang. I did rush to double check that I sent my reply to my mom and not my aunt by mistake.
Yeah that would have been bad.
So then I called my mom thinking maybe she had said something to my aunt in that short time or fwd my reply to her. I would have had a cow but my mom had not been home so nope. Just a quirky little coincidence that made me jumpy. I checked my voice mail and found a cordial happy voice wanting to talk to me about Nanny's party and what I wanted to bring yada yada.
Phew!
But still I pay, I make and I deside. Now if only I could deside...LOL I do have some time till Aug.
She does seem of "that generation" that just doesn't get the love of the art and what going "over the top" means. If you explain to her (thru email or at the party) that you doing this is an expression of your love for your grandmother, maybe she'll understand a bit more. Good luck, I'm sure you'll do a fantastic job! Do you have any ideas yet?
You could always go WAAAAAY overboard and commission Stevie Famulari and scare your aunt. That'll teach her.
I agree with all the other posters. Maybe I'd just add one thing.. I am starting to learn not to let people getting away with being insensitive and rude. When you deliver that gorgeous cake to Nanny's party, I would do something that might make you feel a little uncomfortable, but would be the right thing:
I would take her aside and say "Mom sent me a copy of your email last week since I was planning the cake. I just wanted to tell you that it's important to me to make something special for Nanny and even though it might seem a waste to you, I think she deserves a fancy cake."
That says a lot without saying a lot. To me it says "mind your own business about how I decorate." and "word gets around when you speak badly about someone's 'wasting'" and "never say anything to anyone you wouldnt say in front of them".
She might not learn, but at least she'll learn that you are your own woman who doesn't bow down to her ideas of right and wrong. And you love Nanny enough to pour your heart into your sugar art
I always wonder why after years of being treated bad by family why I haven't developed thicker skin. For me it's worked the opposite - just seems to hurt more. Guess I need to learn to not let people get away with it either, by saying it tactfully as you said here - instead of my usual instincts - pushing them off a cliff, pulling their pants down in public, putting Nair in their shampoo and so on
I think we must be sisters. I should have grown a thicker skin too and it never happens. It hurts everytime.... I feel like I am giving myself advice as much as you LOL
Here's a story: last week we were at a birthday party at 2PM on a very hot muggy southern day. We were out by the pool and my little boy who is just 2 years old was whining to be picked up. Then put down. Then he wanted something... on and on.
For the first few minutes, the little old ladies sitting at our table said "bless his heart" and just ignored him and my attempts at being stern. But I know my son and he just was tired and hot.
Well, my MIL who is very similar to your aunt, but probably worse... says in the iciest tone she could, "he has his MOTHERs temperment..." 
So I look at her and say, "he NEEDS a NAP." I told my mom about it and she said I should have looked incredulously at her and said, "EXCUSE me?"... but I didn't think of it at the time. That and I am not good with quick comebacks. Whew... hard to get that skin to grow thicker. I totally understand!!!!
[quote="loriana"]
... says in the iciest tone she could, "he has his MOTHERs temperment..."
when my oldest daughter was young and still doing the weekend-with-bio-dad thing, she was at his sister's house. My daughter is a lot like me (it's ok to say "Uh-oh!") and she said something that was on the sarcastic side. Her bio-dad's sister (my ex-SIL) said to my daughter, "You're just like your mother!"
And my daughter ... who was about 14 at the time ... said:
(and I was SO proud of her)
She said ..........
"THANK YOU!"
Luv my little girl! And yeah ... it DID tick hff the ex-in-laws! (yay!)
Wow...I checked the photo of that cake..AWESOME!! I am thinking Aunty has her nose a bit out of joint..not wanting Granny to be happier than she is, no doubt. Also not wanting you to getr too many accolades for your artistry. If she says anything at all, just say "I am sure Granny enjoyed it, and that is all that matters!" You are an amazing talent!
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