Wedding Advice For A College Kid :/

Lounge By lbain Updated 24 Jan 2009 , 9:53pm by Deb_

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lbain Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 3:42pm
post #1 of 10

Okay so here is the deal. Im 20 years old in college and my best friend of fifteen years is getting married next weekend and im the MAID OF HONOR!!!
In order to go I have to miss 2 classes....this is a problem with my parents because I had a bad semester last fall so they dont want it to happen again.

So my question is...i can either upset my best friend and miss her rehearsal dinner, bachelorette party, and everything and go to class or upset my mother and miss class (which I will be getting my homework in advance for)??

I dont know what to do???

i need advice thanks guys!!

9 replies
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krysoco Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 3:46pm
post #2 of 10

Missing class to go to the bachlorette party is probably a big no.
Missing class for the wedding is probably doable considering you're getting the HW.

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jen1977 Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 4:27pm
post #3 of 10

I wouldn't miss class for a bachlorette party if I had a bad semester previous. College isn't cheap, and if you've already had problem in class, I'd stay for class.

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dinas27 Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 5:05pm
post #4 of 10

ok so I'm going against the grain but hear me out.

I'm assuming that you are missing two classes but from two different courses. Not such a big deal really depending on what type of learner you are... if you have found that you comprehend well from the text book and have TA/prof office hours available to ensure you grasp the principles I think you're good to go.

School is important yes absolutely however, for me the guilt of missing my best friends big events would probably cause me mental anguish that would affect my grades WAY more than missing a couple of classes.

The key to this is asking your profs for the reading/material ahead of time (MONDAY CLASS) so that you can be ahead and go to the events Friday night guilt free, you will not be stressed about catching up the next week and you can inform your parents that you are ahead of the game and have everything already completed.

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Amia Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 5:13pm
post #5 of 10

I'm in college too, and I'm going to be real with you. It's such a "duh" thing from a mom's point-of-view (I am a mother) don't miss class for anything! But as a fellow college student and 23 yr old, I think you only get married (for the first time, anyway) once. So to me, that's a big deal...especially since she's your bff of 15 years! You're also the MOH and that is a big deal, and a big responsibility...though it really isn't more important than school. I would see if I could attend the same class at a different time. Surely your prof teaches more than one of the same class...most do. Or see if you can stay late or come early. Talk to your prof and see if they're willing to work something out with you. If you talk to your profs, get your homework done and turned in early, then I can't see this messing up your whole semester. It's very early in the semester anyway, you should have plenty of time to catch up if you apply yourself.

Talk to your mom too. Let her know you've worked something out with the profs so you won't be behind and hopefully she'll be okay with everything.

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dinas27 Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 5:19pm
post #6 of 10

oh yes I forgot about those first and second year classes having mulitple sessions a semester, I'm sure you can find another one to attend next week!

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lbain Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 7:19pm
post #7 of 10

yea thats a good idea!! I'm gonna check and see if there is another session I could go to. That would be perfect. I just feel terrible because she lives far and I didnt get to go with her to pick out her dress and invitations and other things you always think you will get to do for your friends wedding and so I want to be there for everything. I think If i went to another session my mom would be okay with it though....


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Deb_ Posted 23 Jan 2009 , 9:54pm
post #8 of 10

As a mother of a 20 yr old daughter whose college tuition we are paying for, I'll tell you what I'd tell my daughter if she were in your situation.

"Since your grades were not up to par last semester, I cannot give you my blessing about missing 2 days of class. Obviously, you need to attend the rehearsal dinner and wedding since you are the MOH so you have my permission to miss 1 day of classes.
By missing 2 days in a row now, it leaves you no room for the rest of the semester if you are ill and can't attend. Part of being an adult is putting your priorities in order. Missing an extra day so you can get there in time for the bachelorette party is not a priority." Sorry! icon_sad.gif

I know it sucks for you that your parents aren't on board with you on this, but put yourself in their shoes for a second. Imagine having to sacrifice to send your child to college and the first semester they don't do so well, so you give them a chance to make it up 2nd semester. Than that child comes to you and tells you they need to take 2 days off so they can attend these events. As a parent, my first thought would be that you're not taking this seriously enough.

Now, if YOU are paying for your own tuition, than you can do what you want. It's your money your throwing away, not your parents. KWIM?

I'm really not picking on you, it's just that I have 2 in college right now, so this is a sore subject with me. We tell our kids all the time that our job is to provide them with the opportunity to go to college and earn their degree, their job is to work their hardest to make good grades. It's not a party time all the time.

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lbain Posted 24 Jan 2009 , 4:26pm
post #9 of 10


I would only be missing one day of classes but that day i have 2 different classes.

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Deb_ Posted 24 Jan 2009 , 9:53pm
post #10 of 10

Oops sorry, I misread your first post I thought you were missing 2 days.

Okay, different scenerio, I'd give you my blessing to go since it's only 2 classes.

Let your Mom read this, maybe she'll change her mind if she sees another Mom is on board with you! icon_lol.gif

I hope she gives you her blessing so you can have fun!

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