I'm new to cake decorating. My husband is a teacher so I send all of my cake experiments to his school to solicit opinions. One of the teachers asked for my recipes, because she decorates cakes on the side too. I have spent countless hours coming up with all of my recipes, and I'm torn as to whether to give her the recipe or not. If she didn't sell cakes too I would definately just give it to her, but considering that she could sell cakes to all of the same people I could, I don't know what to do. Right now I'm thinking I"m probably just going to give it to her.... but I was curious what everyone else would do.

Have you ever noticed that the same recipe tastes different when made by two different people? I've noticed that...when I share a recipe, it comes out different from mine anyhow.

If you don't want to give her your recipes, don't. You can either just fib a little bit and say that you're using some out of a book from the library, or from the Wilton yearbook, and that you just change the flavorings around a bit to go with the cake flavor, or you can tell her that you don't share your recipes.

I have one recipe that I don't share with anyone. And when I tell them no, I say, "It's a family recipe that I've promised not to share."

I'd have to say no. Especially since you're the one who spent hours creating these recipes, and she's also a decorator!!

As a baker, she'll probably be fine if you don't want to share - she knows that we all have our secret recipes/secret ingredients/etc.

I may share some of my secrets (like I never make chocolate cake without some coffee or espresso in it) but I will rarely hand out the recipe verbatim.

She should understand and respect your standing if she's also a decorator. Just simply say they are your family recipes that you don't give out. Maybe direct her to others or "base" recipes you may have used. Don't feel obligated to give out something you worked on.

The reason she wants yours, yours taste better. Not me I wouldn't. Let her spend the hours to get the recipe she wants. I'm sorry if this sounds terribly rude. Let go through the expense, and time to perfect her recipe.

Mike

I agree, DO NOT give out your recipes. Most of mine I wouldnt give out. Just firmly but politely tell her you cannot give out your recipes. I am sure she will understand.

I wouldn't do it for the main reason that is basically your main competition.
It would be like legal seafood giving red lobster their recipes
ain't gonna happen.

I agree that you should just say they are family recipes that you're not supposed to share.

Tacky and rude to ask the competition to share...
My fave is "If I told you,I'd have to kill you." Usually shuts them up. If she is REALLY insistent, then give her a different recipe. With the explanation "Oh, I just start here, and kind of add as I go.. Good Luck!" She'll stop asking soon.

I'd be like..........you can buy the recipes...I have them for sale for $10,000.00 each.....because in the end that's how much I could make from them over time! lol Either that or tell her to cough up all of HER recipes first! Wonder how she'd feel??? Either way, I would definitely tell her that if you gave out your recipes you wouldn't have a cake bus.!

I wouldn't...she can search for and perfect her own. We all did, she can too.

I'm always blown away with other people's rudeness with their "innocent" little questions. This is as baudy as asking how much you paid for something. No class if you ask me.

I have had this happen often. What I've learned to do it say..... Oh gosh Im glad you like the cake, it took me years to get my recipe the way I wanted. You might try adding an extra egg or vanilla to yours and see if that helps.

I just leave it at that. This way you are being nice by trying to help but also saying, "you really need to take the time and effort to make your own recipes" in a kind way.

I've had this happen to me as well. Her asking for your recipes is like taking a short cut.

Why do people do that? She can obviously taste how good your recipes are and that is why she wants them. Why would you want to give something that you have worked so hard on?

Don't tear yourself up about it. Say no because you have no idea where your hard work will lead you.

Nope - don't do it. You can always say it is a secret family recipe - I have a fudge recipe that my grandmother got from her mother on her death bed (literally!) and never shared with her sisters. She gave it to my mom and no one else. I JUST got the recipe about 2 years ago!! It is not written down and I have to go through it with my mom every year to make sure I have it down. My 10 year old keeps asking when he will get it - I told him not until he is in his 30's at least!!! LOL!

I definitely agree with everyone, do NOT give out your recipes! You put a lot of time, effort and expense into the creation of your recipes! You wouldn't just hand over a scratch cake that took hours to decorate, would you? You can't go to the store and ask for the designer's pattern for a dress you like. You have to buy the dress or make one of your own.

DO NOT share your recipes. Specially if she also sells cakes to the same people.

there's no way i would give her the recipe, especially if she does cakes too.
i think she sees you as competition.

I wouldn't lie to her by saying it's a family recipe when it isn't. If you don't want to share, tell her just that - you don't give out your recipes, or you only give out some of your recipes; whatever the case may be.

I think a polite "no thank you" is good enough. People don't realize that it's the recipes that make or break you!

Thanks guys! I was really feeling guilty about not wanting to give it to her. I thought I was being rude and selfish by not wanting to share. I feel much better now. Thanks for your support! I really appreciate it!

You can always tell her you don't have a recipe... I know when I bake I usually just throw some stuff in without measuring. Something along those lines will probably drop a big enough hint that she won't ask again